Rating: G for a change for strictly SABER.
Author's Note: Just a little something sweet... It's Robert Davi's birthday and I was in the "birthday mood".
MANY HAPPY RETURNS
"What a rotten day," he thought.
Bailey sighed and took another drink from his glass of Jameson's. It was after 9, and he was the only one still at the office. The rest of the VCTF had left for the day - they apparently had a life and a reason to go home. He did not, he thought ruefully. It was his birthday, and who gave a damn? Oh, he knew that the team knew it was his birthday. Grace had even wished him "Happy Birthday", but he rest of the guys knew better than to bring it up. It was not a happy day for him.
He took another long puff on his Monte Cristo - a special indulgence he had allowed himself today. "Happy Birthday to me," he thought sadly and puffed again. "Happy" was something he hadn't been in a very long time. He did his job - went through the motions of living - but the spark was gone.
There were birthday cards from both of his daughters, they had remembered him. But they were both in other states and that still left him alone... and lonely.
He had felt this way ever since she had left... over a year now. At first, she had sent him an occasional note... a Christmas card. He had fooled himself into believing that she might come back into his life someday... after Chloe had recovered... after she could forget "Jack". But the notes had suddenly stopped. Not a word from her in over four months. He had to face the fact that she had made her decision. She had obviously moved on and didn't want him in her life.
He drained his glass and sighed.
Sam Waters was the reason for his sadness. They had been friends for so many years. He couldn't remember when they weren't. He also couldn't remember when exactly his feelings for her had changed... when he had fallen in love with her. But he had... and he had fallen hard. But his love was unrequited. He knew that she didn't feel the same way towards him. There was a time when he thought there might be a chance... after Frances had shot him... but then... And he had never dared to tell her of his feelings. He was too afraid that he would lose what they already had... that very special friendship that meant so much to him. That he would make her uncomfortable and drive her away. He laughed sadly. He had done that anyway... driven her away. He blamed himself for her departure. If he had only gotten Jack out of her life sooner... if only...
He stood and walked over to the decanter of liquor and poured himself another round. He wanted to forget, and the booze seemed to be the only thing that helped these days. He turned and walked back towards his desk.
"Hey."
He froze. The voice... that sweet familiar voice that he missed so much.
The booze must really be getting to him he thought. It sounded like Sam.
Bailey turned around and looked towards the door. Sam was standing
there. He rubbed his eyes in disbelief... He looked again... she was still
there. Without thinking he walked... almost ran to her and wrapped her
in his arms. "Sam," he cried and held her tightly. He didn't care why she
was there he just needed to hold her. He buried his face in the warmth
of her hair and drew in the smell of her. He reveled in the feel of her
body in his arms. This felt so familiar... so right.
His senses were on overload and his brain was reeling. Why was she here? What did it mean? Finally, he released her from his arms and looked at her.
"Sam. What are you doing here? It's so good to see you." God, that sounds so lame, he thought. But the words wouldn't come to him to express how he really felt.
She smiled back at him and his heart broke. He wondered if he would ever be able to look at her without feeling like a schoolboy with his first crush.
"I came to see you and wish you a 'happy birthday'." She kissed him lightly on the cheek. " I might have known that you'd be at the office late on your own birthday. Why aren't you out celebrating?"
He smiled sadly. "I'm not much on birthdays anymore, Sam. They just remind me how fast time is passing... how much I've wasted." He took her hand and led her inside. "But sit down and tell me how you've been. How's Chloe?"
"Much better." She sat on his leather couch and he sat next to her... still holding her hand. "The doctor thinks she has made wonderful progress and is back to 'normal'."
That's great, Sam. I'm so glad for you both." His voice was a low whisper. "And what about you... how are you doing?"
She smiled brightly. "I'm doing fantastic. I've been seeing a therapist too and he's done wonders. Made me face a lot of things about myself... about the past."
"That's great, Sam. You look happy."
"I am. And I have exciting news..." she paused and looked at him. "I'm in love."
Bailey heard the words in slow motion... the pain hit him slowly too... like a knife being pushed into his gut... an inch at a time until it was in up to the hilt... The ache seemed to start in his stomach and was radiating out to his extremities. He released her hand and tried to hold his emotions in check. The words kept reverberating in his mind. "I'm in love... I'm in love... in love... in love."
His brain screamed out "NO!" but instead he asked evenly. "Really? Who's the lucky guy? Anyone I know?" His voice was calm... giving no hint of the panic that was consuming him. It was finally too late. Any chance he had with Sam was over. God, why hadn't he said something sooner?
Sam smiled knowingly and took his hand back in hers. She stroked it and looked deeply into his eyes. "Can't you guess?"
He couldn't answer and only shook his head sadly.
She placed her one hand on his cheek and smiled again. "It's you, Bail. I'm in love with you."
He thought later that he would always remember those words for as long
as he lived. The world stopped and he tried to comprehend what he had just
heard. Was he really losing his mind? She couldn't have said what he thought
she said. He was numb and looked at her as if in a trance
.
"Well... aren't you going to say anything?"
"Sam... I..." He looked into her deep blue eyes and tried to see if she did mean it... that she was in love with him. "Are you sure?"
"I've never been more sure of anything in my life. It took the therapist to make me see what had been right in front of me all these years. I love you, Bailey. I've been in love with you for so long but I just wouldn't let myself see." She kissed him lightly. "Please tell me it's not too late, Bail. Do you feel anything for me?"
"Oh, Sam," he sighed and kissed her back passionately. His mouth gave her the answer she wanted. He covered her with kisses and pulled her tightly against him. His hands caressed her back and his tongue did the same with her mouth. Finally, he pulled back and looked at her... his breathing ragged... his eyes blazing with love. "Sam, I can't believe this. I've been in love with you for so long. I can't remember when I wasn't."
"Then why didn't you tell me?"
"I don't know..." He answered shyly and bit his lower lip for control. "Except I never thought that you would ever feel the same... that you could love me as a man. I thought you would only want me as a friend."
"Oh, Bail. You are my best friend. But so much more."
"I guess I didn't want to risk losing what we already had... and then you left..."
"And that was the worst day of my life, Bail. It took all the strength I had to walk away from you. But I thought I had to... for Chloe."
"I know, kid. You don't have to explain."
"But I want to. When I moved away I thought I could put all the past behind... start over... make a new life. I wanted to forget all about the VCTF... about the dark side of life that had been 'my' life for so long. But I wasn't happy. Something was missing and I didn't know what." She smiled at him. "That's when I went to the therapist... to find out why I still wasn't happy."
"And he helped?"
"Yes. He made me realize that leaving Atlanta wasn't the answer... That I had left behind something very important..."
"Your work?"
"No, Bailey... you. That's what I needed. That's what I needed to make me happy. Only you."
He hugged her against him and stroked her hair gently.
She looked up and smiled. "And what now? Do you want me back?"
He caressed her face. "Do you have to ask?" He leaned down and enveloped her mouth with his. They kissed hungrily... years of repressed desire finally being released. When he released her mouth, they both took some much-needed air.
Sam stroked his face and sighed. "I love you so much, Bail. Please forgive me for going away."
"Sam, that's all in the past. I understand. All that's important now is that you did return... to me."
"Happy Birthday, Bailey." Sam wrapped her arms around him and kissed him lovingly.
"I love you, Sam." He held her face in both of his hands and kissed her deeply. Then, he gazed into her eyes and whispered softly. "You're all the present I'll ever need."
The end.