A/N: Just so you know I carry a spatula, be afraid be very afraid.
DISCLAIMER: If I owned Harry Potter the third Harry Potter movie, The Prisoner of Azkaban, would have been good…what a shame PS- THIS FANFIC WILL MORE THAN LIKELY CONTAIN SEXUAL SCENE AND INUENDO OH AND SMARTASS COMMENTS SO YOU WERE WARNDED.OH AND THERE IS MALE/MALE RELATIOINSHIP SO IF YOU'RE A HOMOPHOB YOU MAY WANT TO TURN BACK NOW, BUT IF YOU'RE A HOMOPHOB AND REALLY WANT TO READ THIS THEN TAKE YOUR HOMOPHOBIC PILLS.
R&R NO FLAMES, I GET IT PEOPLE I SUCK, I REALLY DON'T NEED YOU TO REMIND ME.
Chapter 1: Maybe it was Liver of Goat
Severus Snape starred around at his mediocre potions class. The bell had just rung to start class and the last of the slow walkers had just arrived, and by slow walkers I mean the trio.
"Granger, Weasley 10 points each for being late, and a extra 5 for handholding."
Ron and Hermione both scowled at Snape and gave Harry, "Your probably going to get the worst of this" look, and made their way to the table in the back.
Snape's mouth curved into a grin, 'Time to fuck with Potter' he thought to himself.
"20 points for your lateness Potter"
Harry rolled his eyes and went to sit with Hermione and Ron, until Snape called out to him.
"Actually Mr. Potter, how about you sit with Mr. Longbottom today, Weasley and Granger's frolicking back there may become a distraction to you. Your grades can barley been seen with a magnifying glass now."
All heads turned to see a blushing Hermione; you couldn't see Ron due to the fact he had sought refuge in his hands.
Harry glared at Snape before reluctantly heading for the vacant seat beside of Neville in the front. He threw his bag down on the ground and flopped down in the seat.
"Hi ya Harry" Neville smiled
Harry gave a small wave. He tried to drown out Snape's lecturing about some sort of potion they were to be doing with partners. It was kind of hard to drown out the sound do to the fact of constant quill scratching paper as Neville wrote down each thing Snape said apparently not wanting to fuck anything up.
Harry rolled his eyes. He hated everything about his potions master right down to his long pointed nose. As Harry continued to glare Snape flicked his wand and cauldrons appeared on every table.
"Now look at the insolent fool you're sitting next to, that is your partner. You two are to work on a Metamorphing potion, but only, a minor one. As soon as your potion is complete you will say the thing you want to morph into and then drink some of the potion. If it is done correctly you will turn into whatever you said for only 5 minutes and you will turn back any questions?"
Hermione raised her hand with a determined look about her. Snape tried hard to suppress his eyes from rolling into the back of his head. "Yes Miss Granger" he hissed out, knowing the know-it-all was sure to have found some loophole in the potion's name.
"Professor Snape, I think I have found a loophole in the potion's name."
"Oh, really do let us know what the loophole is please." Snape said sarcastically.
"Well, why would it not be referred to as the Poly Juice potion. It is basically the same thing. Who would want to make a potion that turned you into what you said for only five minutes? If you ask me-"
"Unfortunately I did ask you, but you know Miss Granger I don't give a rats ass if I asked you or not. Shut the hell up and make this goddamn potion if you want to pass my class. Any more stupid questions, comments or concerns?"
Neville slowly raised his hand. Snape grip his chair, if the chair hadn't have been there it would have been Neville neck he would be gripping. Snape took in a deep breath and let it out "Yes Mr. Longbottom?"
"What happens if we mess up the potion" Normally every one would be laughing at Neville's retardedness but every one else seemed to be wondering the same thing.
Snape still held on tighter to the chair in front of him, he was sure he heard it crack beneath his hands.
"Well to be honest with you Mr. Longbottom, I don't for sure know, nor do I think I want to find out. "Though I am sure that we will all find out due to you small attention span, unlucky for Mister Potter here for being your partner."
Harry looked up and saw the evil glint in Snape's narrowed black eyes, Harry's mouth opened slightly, Snape was right.
Harry picked up his chair and slid it to the very edge of the table. Neville looked hurt "Oh come on Harry I can't possibly screw up I have written everything down that He said, for once in my life I am not a fucker upper" Neville smiled some what assured. Harry could see it in his smile; even Neville himself had a little doubt.
"Now begin the potion, I will walk around and give you F's….. I mean check to see what you're doing." And with that every one began to work on their potion.
Harry looked uneasy at Neville as he began to read aloud. is lips curned in to a devilish grin ""
"Take the liver of frog…. Oh wait or is that liver of smog?" Neville laughed uneasily and frantically tried to read his writing as Harry quickly found Jesus.
Neville gasped. "Oh…. Liver of goat." Neville slapped himself in the head, "Duh!…Do you want to get it or should I?" Neville looked at Harry, who was glaring at him with his emerald eyes alert and his mouth agape, Neville shifted his eyes "I guess I'll go an fetch it." He stumbled out of his seat and into the supply closet.
Harry watched as he disappeared from view.
Harry's gaze wondered to where Hermione and Ron were sitting.
Ron whispered something in Hermione's ear that made her go red in the cheeks. Covering her mouth to muffle out the giggle she whispered in Ron's ear. Harry sighed.
He was so happy when Ron and Hermione finally realized they were meant for reach other. Though Harry had to admit, it made him jealous. He wasn't jealous in the fact that they were dating, he was jealous at the fact he wasn't. Yeah he had tried with Ginny, he really enjoyed I but there was always something missing.
"Potter come out of your fantasy world or I may have to deduct more points" Snape sneered over Harry. Harry turned his attention to the front of him Snape was standing there smirking.
Harry bit his tongue "I won't say anything smartassed, I won't say anything smartassed." He chanted to himself until Neville showed up. "Okay Harry I got the Liver of fox." He showed him a murky looking goop in a jar; Harry cocked his eyebrow at Neville.
"Er... Neville?"
"Yeah Harry" he replied while getting all their supplies ready to be put into the cauldron. Snape watched with his eyebrows raised. Something wasn't right.
"I thought you said it was Liver of Goat you needed, you never said anything about a fox." There was much obvious worry in Harry voice but he didn't care, he did not trust Neville with potion ingredients, he barley trusted Neville with a stick.
Neville caught the worry look in Harry's eyes. "Oh well I figured out that it was Fox instead of Goat. I guess I was writing to fast." He smiled and starting adding ingredients. Harry looked at the first bottle that was in his hand. 'Lugwart' was what Harry read on the purple bottle. He watched as the brown liquid poured in to the cauldron. Harry looked around at everyone else's tables; he saw no purple bottles.
"Neville" Harry said hoarsely as Neville grabbed a small blue bottle that read "Armadillo Skin." He poured it into the cauldron, which made the most terrible hissing sound. Harry listened at every one else's cauldrons; there were no hissing sounds. He looked up and caught gaze with Snape.
Looking into Harry's eyes Snape quickly lowered his to Neville's hands as they grabbed the Liver of Fox. 'OH shit.' Running towards Neville Snape yelled out, "Mr. Long bottom, do-"
Harry realized something was wrong as he saw Snape run towards Neville with his hand out stretched ready to grab the bottle from Neville's hand. At the same time Snape and Harry both grabbed Neville's hand. It was too late. The potion was poured into the cauldron and there was gold light swarming above it. Snape stared at the gold in shock. He looked down and the three hands together.
Neville quickly wrenched his hand back form Harry and Snape.
Following in suit with Neville, Harry tried to pull his hand back but it wouldn't budge. It was like some invisible rope had bound Snape and his hand together. Harry's eyes widened He looked at Snape about to ask him for an explanation, but that would have to wait. The cauldron exploded engulfing Snape and Harry into a purple mist.
Harry felt like he was being electrocuted. He yelped out in pain. The last thing he remembered before passing out was Ron running for help and Neville whining in his hands.
"Maybe it was the liver of goat."
END OF CHAPPIE
OMG I love how the first chapter came out. I have an awesome chapter two in the works. IN chapter two you will find the plot. I didn't want to give too much away in the summary; I wanted you guys to ponder what might happen. If you are dying for more you need to review. If you like my work read some of my other stories while you wait. I am so proud I went in to more detail yay me
JESS