Title: Why Are We Still Friends?
Author: Liete-chan
Part: 1/1
Genre: YAOI
Pairing: MitMiya
Rating: PG
Contact: Cynical_by_Nature@hotmail.com
Warning: UNEDITED. Might be a little OOC
Author's Notes: Please C&C and enjoy!!
Disclaimers: Slam Dunk doesn't belong to me. The characters aren't mine
either. I just use them for my evil purposes. Bwahahahahahahah!!
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"I can't believe this!" Miyagi exclaimed exasperatedly as he shook his beer can. "We're out of beer!"
"We are?" Mitsui moved his feet aside so he could see the empty beer cans that lay messily on the table. "But the game hasn't even started yet?" he pointed toward the TV, which was currently showing an advertisement for a particular brand of cologne.
"No duh!" Miyagi frowned, throwing the mess of beer cans a look of pure distaste. "What now?"
"Don't worry!" Mitsui grinned from ear to ear. "There's a secret stash on the refrigerator! I always keep it there for emergencies."
"Cool! Okay then." Miyagi sat back, waiting for Mitsui to stand up to get some more beer. When the taller boy didn't get up, he asked, "Well? What are you waiting for?"
Mitsui gave Miyagi a sheepish grin. "Well. between you and me, you are seated nearer to the refrigerator.so.."
Miyagi sighed. "So. I should go and get the beer?"
"Exactly!" Mitsui's grin widened. "So.?"
"Okay okay." Miyagi stood up shakily. The alcohol was starting to take effect on him.
"Thanks!" Mitsui said cheerfully, the grin never leaving his face.
"Lazy bum." Miyagi grumbled as he made his way towards the refrigerator, which was located in the dining room.
Mitsui laid his head back and whistled along to a familiar jingle of a popular advertisement.
"Where is it??" Miyagi called out from the dining room.
"I think it's in the freezer!!"
"I can't find it!!"
'Let's see.." Mitsui racked his mind, attempting to remember where he hid the rest of his secret stash of beer. "Look in the vegetable bin!"
He could here rummaging before he hear Miyagi's voice call out from the dinning room, "I found it!! Really, who in his right mind would put beer in the vegetable bin??"
"What else would I put in there? Vegetables?" Mitsui laughed. As he listened to the sound of the refrigerator door close, he looked down at the empty beer can and asked suddenly, "Is Sakuragi THAT special or something??"
Miyagi groaned as he appeared on the doorway to the dining room. "Not this again. how long are you going to mope about it??"
"I mean. he's the only one who stayed behind for a secret training camp with Anzai sensei! Why???"
Miyagi resisted the impulse to roll his eyes. "Maybe because he's new? Geez, I don't know! Will you stop being such a big baby?" Miyagi threw a cold beer can at Mitsui.
"I am NOT a big baby!" Mitsui frowned as he caught the can easily. "I mean, how did you feel?"
"Of course I thought a special training camp with Anzai sensei would be an honor." Miyagi said as he sat down beside Mitsui on the couch and propped his feet on the wooden table. "But. you have to admit. our camp at Josei was cool too."
"Well.. it WAS cool.I showed those Josei bastards not to underestimate our team!" Mitsui opened the beer can and took a sip. "Man this stuff is cold!"
"It's supposed to be cold, you idiot. Are you sure these things aren't expired or something? I mean, these things could really kill you." Miyagi raised the can and looked at the base of the can, looking for a date of expiry.
"Well, there's only one way to find out!" Mitsui took a swig. "Hmm.. Well, it tastes fine to m." Suddenly, Mitsui was still, his eyes widened. Then his free hand went to his throat. "Ack." Mitsui made gagging and wheezing noises. "H.Hel.help. C.Can't ..B.Breathe."
Miyagi glared at Mitsui. "Haha! Very funny." Miyagi grabbed a pillow and threw it in Mitsui's direction.
Mitsui caught the pillow with his free hand and laughed. "What?? I thought my acting was perfect!!"
"That little act of yours couldn't even fool my grandfather!" Miyagi turned his attention towards the TV set. "Hey! It's starting!"
Mitsui looked at the TV. Indeed, it was now showing the Tokyo Central Coliseum getting filled up by audiences, all of whom are excited to see the finals of the College Basketball Tournament.
"I can't believe that the finals are televised this year." Mitsui observed as he saw several media crew milling around the gym, setting up their equipment.
"This is big time because I heard there are several ace players who have NBA recruiters following them around like lap dogs." Miyagi replied with a note of distaste.
"Good for them." Mitsui threw the now empty can in his hands and stretched his arms at the back of the couch.
"Hmm?" Miyagi replied, his attention fixated at the television.
"Nothing." Mitsui looked at Miyagi. His long arms were stretched out over the back of the couch. It wasn't like he had his arms around Miyagi, but if the point guard sat back, his arm would come in contact with Miyagi's back.
They were very close to one another. Ever since Mitsui came back to the basketball team, they got to know each other better. Mitsui couldn't even figure out why he could ever be angry with Miyagi. They had so much in common. They both have this tendency to be physical rather than to reason out. They come to school at the same time, since they both wake up late. They both love to tease their teammates specially Hanamichi, whenever he makes stupid mistakes. Both of them are cocky, egoistic and determine. Even their teamwork was absolutely divine.
Mitsui sighed. Miyagi once joked that he was like a brother, a best friend. Mitsui had smiled at that comment, but the truth still remained.
I don't wanna be like your brother.
I don't wanna be your best friend.
I want to be..
I want to be your.
".Everything." Mitsui said the last part of his thoughts out loud.
"What?" Miyagi looked at Mitsui. "Everything what??"
"Oh. um. it's nothing." Mitsui turned his attention back towards the television. He wanted to kick himself for saying his thoughts out loud, but sometimes he couldn't help it. He was tired of it all. Everything he felt became thoughts and nothing more. He could never say it out loud because he knew, no matter what he does, or what he says, Miyagi and he will end up just being friends.
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"Oi Micchy! What's wrong with you??"
Mitsui looked up and saw Hanamichi looking at him with extreme scrutiny. "What? oh. it's nothing."
"Hanamichi, what are you doing?? Miyagi said as he ran towards the bench. "We're in the middle of practice!"
"The Tensai doesn't need any practice!! Nyahahaha!" Hanamichi said, doing his usual Tensai pose. "and Micchy here isn't practicing either!"
"Ah. gomen. I have lots of things on my mind." Mitsui said, looking at Hanamichi.
"Is everything alright?" Kogure said as he approached the three.
"Ah. I'm okay." Mitsui waved them off. He was beginning to attract the attention of a number of people. "Just. continue practicing, okay?"
"Okay." Kogure said, his brows still knotted in concern.
"Hai hai! And I know you two would want to be alone." Hanamichi said, looking at Miyagi suggestively. "kekekekeke." he laughed as he went back towards the center of the court.
Mitsui's glare followed the redhead. He knew Hanamichi meant it as a joke, but he hated how it had come so close to home.
Miyagi sat beside Mitsui. "Oi! This isn't about that secret training camp again, is it?"
Mitsui looked at Miyagi incredulously. "No!"
"Good, because if you were gonna mope about that again, I'm gonna have to strangle you." Miyagi scolded in a voice loud enough for Hanamichi to hear.
"Oi Ryochin!" Hanamichi said. "That isn't the way to comfort your koishi! I thought you'd get all lovey-dovey or something!!"
Miyagi frowned and yelled back, "Hanamichi, just because you have a relationship with another guy, doesn't mean everyone else does!!"
"Nani!!" Hanamichi exclaimed. He stopped running and looked at Miyagi. "Demo Ryochin-" Hanamichi never finished the sentence as Ayako decided to grace the redhead with her paper fan skills.
"Sakuragi Hanamichi!!" Ayako yelled. "Keep your mind on the game!!"
Rukawa shook his head in utter disbelief. "Ahou."
"Mou kitsune~" Hanamichi whined. "You're supposed to be on my side~!"
Mitsui shook his head as well and looked at Miyagi. The shorter boy was looking at the team manageress, with a content smile on his face. Mitsui looked at Ayako. He had to admit; he could see why Miyagi liked Ayako. The girl was beautiful, assertive, intelligent and confident. But she was too serious. She couldn't possibly be the girl who would just fall back and fall in love. In fact, he thought that falling in love was Ayako's last priority.
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"So how's the sky??" Miyagi asked as he climbed up the ladder.
Mitsui looked up. "A few stars. the moon is almost full.. Not a cloud in sight."
"Cool." Miyagi sat down next to Mitsui and looked up as well, enjoying the beauty of the night sky. They always hang out at the rooftop, looking at the sky and talking.
"You were looking at Ayako again at practice today." Mitsui commented, wanting to see Miyagi's reaction.
"What? You mean, it's THAT noticeable?" Miyagi laughed. "Well. I mean..so what?"
"I mean. do you plan to tell her about what you feel?" Mitsui looked up. He didn't like talking about her. He didn't like hearing Miyagi enumerate on why Ayako was the perfect girl in the whole wide world.
"I was planning to tell her tomorrow. but I don't think I can." Miyagi admitted. "I don't think. I'll ever come around to doing that."
"What do you mean?" Mitsui laughed. "Geez. you are such a coward. Come on. I'll help you out."
"What?"
"I'll teach you what to say to her!!"
"Really?"
"Yeah!!" Mitsui stood up carefully, not wanting to fall. "Let's pretend, okay? I'll be you, you'll be Ayako!"
"Wait!" Miyagi protested. "Why do I have to be the girl?"
"Because you don't know how to be the guy!!" Despite more protests from Miyagi, Mitsui was able to pull the shorter boy to his feet.
"Okay. first things first. Talk to her in a private place.like the garden or something."
"Why?"
"So that when you get dumped, no one will see your humiliating moment!" Seeing the hateful look on Miyagi's face, Mitsui quickly added, "Joking! Come on. let's see."
"Do we really have to do this?"
"Of course!" Mitsui said, a little bit too happily.
Miyagi looked down and grumbled, "Why isn't love ever easy??"
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"Why isn't love ever easy??" Mitsui asked himself as he made his way through the hallway. He was headed towards the garden to see how Miyagi was doing. He quickened his steps.
What if Ayako loves him too?
What if I lose Ryota?
He practically ran through the garden gate, in a hurry to find them. What am I thinking? Even If I get there. what would I do? Stop them?
He stopped running as reality struck him. No matter what he did now, it wouldn't matter at all. Even if he saw Ayako and Miyagi, all he could do was stop to eavesdrop.
"Mitsui san?" he heard a whisper behind him. Mitsui turned around and was surprised to see Miyagi there, looking all slumped and tired. His eyes were reddish, as if he had tried to prevent himself from crying.
"Miyagi. what are you doing here? I thought you were with Ayako?"
"Aya-chan.she." Miyagi tried to speak, but his lips trembled as he said her name. He blinked several times, as the tears threatened to pour once again.
Uh-oh. Mitsui thought as he saw Miyagi's shoulders quake. Mitsui approached Miyagi cautiously, afraid of the possibility of an emotional outburst.
He had just taken two steps when finally; a small cry broke through Miyagi's crumbling defenses and escaped through his lips. Hesitantly, Mitsui put his arms around Miyagi, who started to sob freely. Miyagi kept his head buried on Mitsui's chest, unable to look at Mitsui in humiliation.
"Want to talk about it?" Mitsui asked. He felt Miyagi's head shake left and right, indicating a 'no'. He wanted to help Miyagi, to share in his pain. Was it his fault? He knew that Miyagi was on the trail of a suicide romance, and that he was headed for rejection. but all he wanted was to keep Miyagi hoping for the best. Was it fair? He felt like rejoicing right now, since he did not lose Miyagi, but seeing the boy hurt deep in disappointment, anger, humiliation and resentment, Mitsui suddenly felt guilty.
What did he want?
If Ayako had accepted Miyagi, he would lose someone he loved dearly. Was he secretly hoping Ayako would reject Miyagi?
Mitsui was awakened from his reverie when Miyagi sniffled. Mitsui realized he was holding Miyagi too tight, too close for a very long time now. "Ah. I didn't mean to." he started to loosen his embrace, he felt Miyagi grip at his shirt.
"No.don't." Miyagi pleaded. "I.I need you."
Mitsui bit his lip as he pats Miyagi gently on the back. He never saw him this vulnerable before. "It's okay. you'll see. Everything will turn out okay."
As Miyagi tightened his grip on Mitsui's shirt, and as he began a new fit of sobs, Mitsui asked the same question he had been asking all afternoon.
"Why isn't love ever easy??"
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"Where's Miyagi?" Akagi asked at practice one afternoon.
"Right! Where's Ryochin?" Hanamichi looked at Mitsui.
"What?" Mitsui shrugged Hanamichi off. " Why me?"
"You always know where he is! I mean, you're always together!" Hanamichi debated.
"Whatever." Mitsui said. He didn't have the time to argue with the redhead. The truth was, he was really worried about Miyagi. Miyagi had been like a zombie for 4 days now, silent for a long time before breaking out into a mad fit of incessant ramblings, curses and violence upon walls, posts, and pillars, which often resulted with the shorter boy breaking into tears helplessly like a kid with a bleeding fist.
Mitsui stood up and began to walk towards the door. "I'm going to look for him." But just as he reached the door, he ran into Miyagi, who strangely had a smile on his face.
"Where have you been!" Mitsui scolded. "Do you realize that you're late for practice? I was so worried! I thought you had jumped off a bridge or something."
Miyagi blinked at Mitsui, smiling as if he was under a spell. "Jump? Why?"
"Because of Ayako.remember?"
He saw a flicker of pain in Miyagi's eyes but the boy was quick to hide it. "Aya who?"
"Are you feeling okay?"
"I feel soooo good!!"
Mitsui sighed. He grabbed Miyagi's arm and led him outside the gym. "Tell me."
"I was walking around the campus. thinking. then I met this girl! Her name is Mayu. she's a freshman and.well, she's just perfect! We talked for a while. then I realized we had a lot in common!" Miyagi started to walk back towards the gym. "I'll tell you later. Now, we have to practice!"
Mitsui could only stare as Miyagi practically skipped back inside. He was glad Miyagi had gotten over Ayako but.what was this? Could someone fall in love that easily?
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"Hey, do you know anything about Greek Literature?" Miyagi suddenly asked.
"What??" Mitsui asked.
"It's just that Mayu loves Greek Literature and I wanted to impress her so."
"I thought you said you and Mayu had a lot in common." Mitsui said, looking at Miyagi. Miyagi kept his eyes down, avoiding Mitsui's gaze.
"Well.we do! I mean. it's just that you know. to make everything perfect! Oh yeah. she loves intelligent people so. do you have any thick intelligent looking books around here?"
"What?" Mitsui asked again in disbelief. "You hate studying!"
"This will do." Miyagi picked up a book from Mitsui's shelf. It was thick and dusty. "Perfect!! You know, maybe I should also get glasses. you know, like Kogure san? Mayu wears glasses too and she."
Mitsui stood up. He's had enough of this nonsense. He took the book from Miyagi's hands and placed his hands on Miyagi's shoulder. "What are you doing??"
"What?? I'm just trying to impress this girl that I like!"
"No you're not! You're pretending to be someone else altogether! Tell me, do you really love this girl?"
"Of course I do!"
"What about Ayako?"
"What's this now?" Miyagi shouted back. "First, you wanted me to get over Aya-chan and now that I found another girl. you're against it! What's up with that??"
"You don't love THIS girl!! I can see it in your eyes!! You're just doing what you used to do!! You're just using this Mayu girl to forget Ayako! You're just setting yourself up for another heartbreak!"
"How would you know Mitsui san? You've never really fallen in love, have you? You don't know how it feels to want someone so much that you think your heart is gonna explode!"
"Oh yes I do!"
"Then you know how it feels like, don't you?" Miyagi asked, his eyes brimming with tears. "When you want something to be perfect, you do all you can to make it perfect, even as far as changing yourself!"
Mitsui shook his head. "Then why do you spend so much time trying to make others love you when you don't have time for those who already do!!" he shouted at the top of his voice. He couldn't hold it any longer. He was emotionally spent.
Miyagi was about to say something, but he stopped and he looked at Mitsui. "What did you just say?"
"You heard what I said." Mitsui said, his voice hardly above a whisper. "You spent so much time trying to make some things perfect when there are things that already are."
"M.Mitsui san?'
"I can't do this any longer." Mitsui said, as he took a step away from Miyagi. "I'm not some dumping ground. The only time you really need me is when you're depressed after getting dumped. Well, you can just go and cry on somebody else's shoulders!! I have feelings too you know!!! But you never noticed!! Hell, you never had a friggin clue of what I felt about you!!"
Miyagi kept on looking at Mitsui, too shocked to say anything. "Y.you."
"Yes me! Now can you imagine how much it hurts? Everything about us, I held special while you only treated in platonically. It was ALMOST perfect!! I admit I was happy when Ayako dumped you because I did not want to lose you! Perfect except for the fact you didn't see it the way that I did." Mitsui looked at Miyagi intently. He needed an answer. It was the moment of truth.
"I can't believe. you lied to me. " Miyagi whispered, taking a step backward. "All this time." Miyagi didn't bother to finish. He simply took one last look at Mitsui, shook his head in disbelief, and ran out the door.
Mitsui winced as the door made a loud bang as it closed. He wanted to run after Miyagi, but realization hit him so hard that he had to sit down.
He thought confessing would finally answer his question if he and Miyagi were just friends or more than friends. It hadn't occurred to him that there was another possibility:
Less than friends.
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Miyagi collapsed on his bed, covering his head with a pillow. He didn't know what to feel right now. He was always the one who told his feelings. He hadn't expected to be on the receiving side of a confession. Now he knew how Ayako and the others must have felt.
What would Mitsui san feel? Miyagi wondered. I can't hurt him. like how I got hurt. What about everything? He remembered the good times they had together at their games, at the park, at Mitsui's house hanging out and out on the rooftop.
I can't lose him. I need him.
What do I do??
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Mitsui fished out the keys from the flowerpot next to the door. He never knew why his parents insisted on putting the house keys among the leaves instead of under the rug like normal people do.
Mitsui grabbed the doorknob and strangely, it opened, indicating that it was already unlocked. Mitsui's face bore a look of confusion and mild panic as he slowly opened the door. The windows were opened and the television was on.
"Hey." He heard a familiar voice greet him. When Mitsui came closer, he was Miyagi sitting on the sofa, with the TV remote in hand.
"What are you doing here?" Mitsui meant it in an inquisitive way, but a tone of annoyance crept through his voice.
Miyagi shrugged. "Why not? I mean, I always come in and out as I please."
"This is not exactly one of those days.." Mitsui said, finally stopping beside the couch.
Miyagi looked at the remote, until he found the button to turn the TV off. The loud chatter on the TV disappeared, replaced by a cloud of dread and silence.
Miyagi broke the silence by saying, "You are an idiot."
"What??" Mitsui asked, astounded.
"Please. sit down. we need to talk."
Mitsui sat down slowly. "Look. if this is about yesterday."
"Of course it's about yesterday.." Miyagi summoned all his courage and looked at Mitsui in the eye. "Why did you have to keep it from me?"
"Because I knew it would end up like this."
"Like what?"
"I mean. you.." Mitsui stopped. He didn't really give this scenario much thought.
Miyagi laughed. "You don't know me THAT well. why? Did you think I would reject you?"
"Well.yes." Mitsui admitted. He can't lie, not when Miyagi was being brutally honest.
"I thought about that too." Miyagi looked at the couch and started to trace the patterns with his fingers. "Then I thought about how I got rejected.how I got hurt. how you got hurt.then I thought about how Aya-chan didn't even give me a chance to show her how I feel." Miyagi's voice was starting to get shaky. "Mitsui. I don't want to get hurt anymore.it's too painful."
"I never meant to do that. "Mitsui shook his head. "I thought telling you how I feel was the best thing to do. I would be lying if I said that I want to be just friends."
Miyagi moved nearer towards Mitsui. "And I would be lying if I said I didn't care about you and I didn't need you."
"Ryo..ta."
"And that's what made it so hard for me! I kept thinking that if I hurt you, I'd destroy everything between us and I don't want that to happen. We had some good times together after we became friends. I didn't want to lose all that so I thought that maybe I should take a chance with you.to give a relationship with you a try.." Miyagi said, moving a little bit closer again.
Mitsui looked at Miyagi intently. "You did?"
Miyagi nodded. "But then I thought. wouldn't it be difficult? You're a guy. I'm a guy. I'm not used to all of that. I began thinking what other people would say. what I had to give up. whether the relationship would work or not. if I can handle it.. If we'd fight a lot.
"Look. if you don't want to. you don't have to.not for my sake."
Miyagi shook his head. "No. it's okay." he looked up and smiled at Mitsui. "You said everything would be fine. right?"
"I did." Mitsui said.
Miyagi placed his hand on Mitsui's hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "I thought of how hard it would be. but the problem was. I forgot one thing."
"What thing?" Mitsui looked at their hands and entwined his fingers with Miyagi's.
"I didn't have anything to worry about after all. you were right.."
Mitsui looked at Miyagi confused. "About what?"
Miyagi's smile grew wider. "I realized.. That everything about us.. It IS perfect." he said, his voice barely audible at the last word, as he felt the impulse to cry again. "I was just too absorbed in my own world to see it."
"Ryota." Mitsui smiled happily for the first time for what seemed like forever. He moved closer and held Miyagi, relieved when the shorter boy did not pull away. "I love you."
Miyagi smiled, rested his head on Mitsui's shoulder and gave his hand another squeeze, but he didn't say anything. This suited Mitsui just fine. He knew it would be a long time before he would hear Miyagi say those words to him, but he knew all it would take is time and frankly, he didn't care.
All that matters to him is that he knows, they are and always will be. more than just friends..
OWARI
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Whee~!! Yeah! Finally I got to writing! Yeah!! The idea for this fic is from 98 degrees' song, "Why Are We Still Friends?" I hope you liked this fic. I wrote it starting from 1:00 in the morning, so it would probably stink. but all the same, please let me know ^___^ MitMiya forever!! Hahaha. just saw that MitMiya was neglected here in FFN. hmmm. not good. not good at all!! Please review I ask of you!!!
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"I can't believe this!" Miyagi exclaimed exasperatedly as he shook his beer can. "We're out of beer!"
"We are?" Mitsui moved his feet aside so he could see the empty beer cans that lay messily on the table. "But the game hasn't even started yet?" he pointed toward the TV, which was currently showing an advertisement for a particular brand of cologne.
"No duh!" Miyagi frowned, throwing the mess of beer cans a look of pure distaste. "What now?"
"Don't worry!" Mitsui grinned from ear to ear. "There's a secret stash on the refrigerator! I always keep it there for emergencies."
"Cool! Okay then." Miyagi sat back, waiting for Mitsui to stand up to get some more beer. When the taller boy didn't get up, he asked, "Well? What are you waiting for?"
Mitsui gave Miyagi a sheepish grin. "Well. between you and me, you are seated nearer to the refrigerator.so.."
Miyagi sighed. "So. I should go and get the beer?"
"Exactly!" Mitsui's grin widened. "So.?"
"Okay okay." Miyagi stood up shakily. The alcohol was starting to take effect on him.
"Thanks!" Mitsui said cheerfully, the grin never leaving his face.
"Lazy bum." Miyagi grumbled as he made his way towards the refrigerator, which was located in the dining room.
Mitsui laid his head back and whistled along to a familiar jingle of a popular advertisement.
"Where is it??" Miyagi called out from the dining room.
"I think it's in the freezer!!"
"I can't find it!!"
'Let's see.." Mitsui racked his mind, attempting to remember where he hid the rest of his secret stash of beer. "Look in the vegetable bin!"
He could here rummaging before he hear Miyagi's voice call out from the dinning room, "I found it!! Really, who in his right mind would put beer in the vegetable bin??"
"What else would I put in there? Vegetables?" Mitsui laughed. As he listened to the sound of the refrigerator door close, he looked down at the empty beer can and asked suddenly, "Is Sakuragi THAT special or something??"
Miyagi groaned as he appeared on the doorway to the dining room. "Not this again. how long are you going to mope about it??"
"I mean. he's the only one who stayed behind for a secret training camp with Anzai sensei! Why???"
Miyagi resisted the impulse to roll his eyes. "Maybe because he's new? Geez, I don't know! Will you stop being such a big baby?" Miyagi threw a cold beer can at Mitsui.
"I am NOT a big baby!" Mitsui frowned as he caught the can easily. "I mean, how did you feel?"
"Of course I thought a special training camp with Anzai sensei would be an honor." Miyagi said as he sat down beside Mitsui on the couch and propped his feet on the wooden table. "But. you have to admit. our camp at Josei was cool too."
"Well.. it WAS cool.I showed those Josei bastards not to underestimate our team!" Mitsui opened the beer can and took a sip. "Man this stuff is cold!"
"It's supposed to be cold, you idiot. Are you sure these things aren't expired or something? I mean, these things could really kill you." Miyagi raised the can and looked at the base of the can, looking for a date of expiry.
"Well, there's only one way to find out!" Mitsui took a swig. "Hmm.. Well, it tastes fine to m." Suddenly, Mitsui was still, his eyes widened. Then his free hand went to his throat. "Ack." Mitsui made gagging and wheezing noises. "H.Hel.help. C.Can't ..B.Breathe."
Miyagi glared at Mitsui. "Haha! Very funny." Miyagi grabbed a pillow and threw it in Mitsui's direction.
Mitsui caught the pillow with his free hand and laughed. "What?? I thought my acting was perfect!!"
"That little act of yours couldn't even fool my grandfather!" Miyagi turned his attention towards the TV set. "Hey! It's starting!"
Mitsui looked at the TV. Indeed, it was now showing the Tokyo Central Coliseum getting filled up by audiences, all of whom are excited to see the finals of the College Basketball Tournament.
"I can't believe that the finals are televised this year." Mitsui observed as he saw several media crew milling around the gym, setting up their equipment.
"This is big time because I heard there are several ace players who have NBA recruiters following them around like lap dogs." Miyagi replied with a note of distaste.
"Good for them." Mitsui threw the now empty can in his hands and stretched his arms at the back of the couch.
"Hmm?" Miyagi replied, his attention fixated at the television.
"Nothing." Mitsui looked at Miyagi. His long arms were stretched out over the back of the couch. It wasn't like he had his arms around Miyagi, but if the point guard sat back, his arm would come in contact with Miyagi's back.
They were very close to one another. Ever since Mitsui came back to the basketball team, they got to know each other better. Mitsui couldn't even figure out why he could ever be angry with Miyagi. They had so much in common. They both have this tendency to be physical rather than to reason out. They come to school at the same time, since they both wake up late. They both love to tease their teammates specially Hanamichi, whenever he makes stupid mistakes. Both of them are cocky, egoistic and determine. Even their teamwork was absolutely divine.
Mitsui sighed. Miyagi once joked that he was like a brother, a best friend. Mitsui had smiled at that comment, but the truth still remained.
I don't wanna be like your brother.
I don't wanna be your best friend.
I want to be..
I want to be your.
".Everything." Mitsui said the last part of his thoughts out loud.
"What?" Miyagi looked at Mitsui. "Everything what??"
"Oh. um. it's nothing." Mitsui turned his attention back towards the television. He wanted to kick himself for saying his thoughts out loud, but sometimes he couldn't help it. He was tired of it all. Everything he felt became thoughts and nothing more. He could never say it out loud because he knew, no matter what he does, or what he says, Miyagi and he will end up just being friends.
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"Oi Micchy! What's wrong with you??"
Mitsui looked up and saw Hanamichi looking at him with extreme scrutiny. "What? oh. it's nothing."
"Hanamichi, what are you doing?? Miyagi said as he ran towards the bench. "We're in the middle of practice!"
"The Tensai doesn't need any practice!! Nyahahaha!" Hanamichi said, doing his usual Tensai pose. "and Micchy here isn't practicing either!"
"Ah. gomen. I have lots of things on my mind." Mitsui said, looking at Hanamichi.
"Is everything alright?" Kogure said as he approached the three.
"Ah. I'm okay." Mitsui waved them off. He was beginning to attract the attention of a number of people. "Just. continue practicing, okay?"
"Okay." Kogure said, his brows still knotted in concern.
"Hai hai! And I know you two would want to be alone." Hanamichi said, looking at Miyagi suggestively. "kekekekeke." he laughed as he went back towards the center of the court.
Mitsui's glare followed the redhead. He knew Hanamichi meant it as a joke, but he hated how it had come so close to home.
Miyagi sat beside Mitsui. "Oi! This isn't about that secret training camp again, is it?"
Mitsui looked at Miyagi incredulously. "No!"
"Good, because if you were gonna mope about that again, I'm gonna have to strangle you." Miyagi scolded in a voice loud enough for Hanamichi to hear.
"Oi Ryochin!" Hanamichi said. "That isn't the way to comfort your koishi! I thought you'd get all lovey-dovey or something!!"
Miyagi frowned and yelled back, "Hanamichi, just because you have a relationship with another guy, doesn't mean everyone else does!!"
"Nani!!" Hanamichi exclaimed. He stopped running and looked at Miyagi. "Demo Ryochin-" Hanamichi never finished the sentence as Ayako decided to grace the redhead with her paper fan skills.
"Sakuragi Hanamichi!!" Ayako yelled. "Keep your mind on the game!!"
Rukawa shook his head in utter disbelief. "Ahou."
"Mou kitsune~" Hanamichi whined. "You're supposed to be on my side~!"
Mitsui shook his head as well and looked at Miyagi. The shorter boy was looking at the team manageress, with a content smile on his face. Mitsui looked at Ayako. He had to admit; he could see why Miyagi liked Ayako. The girl was beautiful, assertive, intelligent and confident. But she was too serious. She couldn't possibly be the girl who would just fall back and fall in love. In fact, he thought that falling in love was Ayako's last priority.
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"So how's the sky??" Miyagi asked as he climbed up the ladder.
Mitsui looked up. "A few stars. the moon is almost full.. Not a cloud in sight."
"Cool." Miyagi sat down next to Mitsui and looked up as well, enjoying the beauty of the night sky. They always hang out at the rooftop, looking at the sky and talking.
"You were looking at Ayako again at practice today." Mitsui commented, wanting to see Miyagi's reaction.
"What? You mean, it's THAT noticeable?" Miyagi laughed. "Well. I mean..so what?"
"I mean. do you plan to tell her about what you feel?" Mitsui looked up. He didn't like talking about her. He didn't like hearing Miyagi enumerate on why Ayako was the perfect girl in the whole wide world.
"I was planning to tell her tomorrow. but I don't think I can." Miyagi admitted. "I don't think. I'll ever come around to doing that."
"What do you mean?" Mitsui laughed. "Geez. you are such a coward. Come on. I'll help you out."
"What?"
"I'll teach you what to say to her!!"
"Really?"
"Yeah!!" Mitsui stood up carefully, not wanting to fall. "Let's pretend, okay? I'll be you, you'll be Ayako!"
"Wait!" Miyagi protested. "Why do I have to be the girl?"
"Because you don't know how to be the guy!!" Despite more protests from Miyagi, Mitsui was able to pull the shorter boy to his feet.
"Okay. first things first. Talk to her in a private place.like the garden or something."
"Why?"
"So that when you get dumped, no one will see your humiliating moment!" Seeing the hateful look on Miyagi's face, Mitsui quickly added, "Joking! Come on. let's see."
"Do we really have to do this?"
"Of course!" Mitsui said, a little bit too happily.
Miyagi looked down and grumbled, "Why isn't love ever easy??"
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"Why isn't love ever easy??" Mitsui asked himself as he made his way through the hallway. He was headed towards the garden to see how Miyagi was doing. He quickened his steps.
What if Ayako loves him too?
What if I lose Ryota?
He practically ran through the garden gate, in a hurry to find them. What am I thinking? Even If I get there. what would I do? Stop them?
He stopped running as reality struck him. No matter what he did now, it wouldn't matter at all. Even if he saw Ayako and Miyagi, all he could do was stop to eavesdrop.
"Mitsui san?" he heard a whisper behind him. Mitsui turned around and was surprised to see Miyagi there, looking all slumped and tired. His eyes were reddish, as if he had tried to prevent himself from crying.
"Miyagi. what are you doing here? I thought you were with Ayako?"
"Aya-chan.she." Miyagi tried to speak, but his lips trembled as he said her name. He blinked several times, as the tears threatened to pour once again.
Uh-oh. Mitsui thought as he saw Miyagi's shoulders quake. Mitsui approached Miyagi cautiously, afraid of the possibility of an emotional outburst.
He had just taken two steps when finally; a small cry broke through Miyagi's crumbling defenses and escaped through his lips. Hesitantly, Mitsui put his arms around Miyagi, who started to sob freely. Miyagi kept his head buried on Mitsui's chest, unable to look at Mitsui in humiliation.
"Want to talk about it?" Mitsui asked. He felt Miyagi's head shake left and right, indicating a 'no'. He wanted to help Miyagi, to share in his pain. Was it his fault? He knew that Miyagi was on the trail of a suicide romance, and that he was headed for rejection. but all he wanted was to keep Miyagi hoping for the best. Was it fair? He felt like rejoicing right now, since he did not lose Miyagi, but seeing the boy hurt deep in disappointment, anger, humiliation and resentment, Mitsui suddenly felt guilty.
What did he want?
If Ayako had accepted Miyagi, he would lose someone he loved dearly. Was he secretly hoping Ayako would reject Miyagi?
Mitsui was awakened from his reverie when Miyagi sniffled. Mitsui realized he was holding Miyagi too tight, too close for a very long time now. "Ah. I didn't mean to." he started to loosen his embrace, he felt Miyagi grip at his shirt.
"No.don't." Miyagi pleaded. "I.I need you."
Mitsui bit his lip as he pats Miyagi gently on the back. He never saw him this vulnerable before. "It's okay. you'll see. Everything will turn out okay."
As Miyagi tightened his grip on Mitsui's shirt, and as he began a new fit of sobs, Mitsui asked the same question he had been asking all afternoon.
"Why isn't love ever easy??"
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"Where's Miyagi?" Akagi asked at practice one afternoon.
"Right! Where's Ryochin?" Hanamichi looked at Mitsui.
"What?" Mitsui shrugged Hanamichi off. " Why me?"
"You always know where he is! I mean, you're always together!" Hanamichi debated.
"Whatever." Mitsui said. He didn't have the time to argue with the redhead. The truth was, he was really worried about Miyagi. Miyagi had been like a zombie for 4 days now, silent for a long time before breaking out into a mad fit of incessant ramblings, curses and violence upon walls, posts, and pillars, which often resulted with the shorter boy breaking into tears helplessly like a kid with a bleeding fist.
Mitsui stood up and began to walk towards the door. "I'm going to look for him." But just as he reached the door, he ran into Miyagi, who strangely had a smile on his face.
"Where have you been!" Mitsui scolded. "Do you realize that you're late for practice? I was so worried! I thought you had jumped off a bridge or something."
Miyagi blinked at Mitsui, smiling as if he was under a spell. "Jump? Why?"
"Because of Ayako.remember?"
He saw a flicker of pain in Miyagi's eyes but the boy was quick to hide it. "Aya who?"
"Are you feeling okay?"
"I feel soooo good!!"
Mitsui sighed. He grabbed Miyagi's arm and led him outside the gym. "Tell me."
"I was walking around the campus. thinking. then I met this girl! Her name is Mayu. she's a freshman and.well, she's just perfect! We talked for a while. then I realized we had a lot in common!" Miyagi started to walk back towards the gym. "I'll tell you later. Now, we have to practice!"
Mitsui could only stare as Miyagi practically skipped back inside. He was glad Miyagi had gotten over Ayako but.what was this? Could someone fall in love that easily?
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"Hey, do you know anything about Greek Literature?" Miyagi suddenly asked.
"What??" Mitsui asked.
"It's just that Mayu loves Greek Literature and I wanted to impress her so."
"I thought you said you and Mayu had a lot in common." Mitsui said, looking at Miyagi. Miyagi kept his eyes down, avoiding Mitsui's gaze.
"Well.we do! I mean. it's just that you know. to make everything perfect! Oh yeah. she loves intelligent people so. do you have any thick intelligent looking books around here?"
"What?" Mitsui asked again in disbelief. "You hate studying!"
"This will do." Miyagi picked up a book from Mitsui's shelf. It was thick and dusty. "Perfect!! You know, maybe I should also get glasses. you know, like Kogure san? Mayu wears glasses too and she."
Mitsui stood up. He's had enough of this nonsense. He took the book from Miyagi's hands and placed his hands on Miyagi's shoulder. "What are you doing??"
"What?? I'm just trying to impress this girl that I like!"
"No you're not! You're pretending to be someone else altogether! Tell me, do you really love this girl?"
"Of course I do!"
"What about Ayako?"
"What's this now?" Miyagi shouted back. "First, you wanted me to get over Aya-chan and now that I found another girl. you're against it! What's up with that??"
"You don't love THIS girl!! I can see it in your eyes!! You're just doing what you used to do!! You're just using this Mayu girl to forget Ayako! You're just setting yourself up for another heartbreak!"
"How would you know Mitsui san? You've never really fallen in love, have you? You don't know how it feels to want someone so much that you think your heart is gonna explode!"
"Oh yes I do!"
"Then you know how it feels like, don't you?" Miyagi asked, his eyes brimming with tears. "When you want something to be perfect, you do all you can to make it perfect, even as far as changing yourself!"
Mitsui shook his head. "Then why do you spend so much time trying to make others love you when you don't have time for those who already do!!" he shouted at the top of his voice. He couldn't hold it any longer. He was emotionally spent.
Miyagi was about to say something, but he stopped and he looked at Mitsui. "What did you just say?"
"You heard what I said." Mitsui said, his voice hardly above a whisper. "You spent so much time trying to make some things perfect when there are things that already are."
"M.Mitsui san?'
"I can't do this any longer." Mitsui said, as he took a step away from Miyagi. "I'm not some dumping ground. The only time you really need me is when you're depressed after getting dumped. Well, you can just go and cry on somebody else's shoulders!! I have feelings too you know!!! But you never noticed!! Hell, you never had a friggin clue of what I felt about you!!"
Miyagi kept on looking at Mitsui, too shocked to say anything. "Y.you."
"Yes me! Now can you imagine how much it hurts? Everything about us, I held special while you only treated in platonically. It was ALMOST perfect!! I admit I was happy when Ayako dumped you because I did not want to lose you! Perfect except for the fact you didn't see it the way that I did." Mitsui looked at Miyagi intently. He needed an answer. It was the moment of truth.
"I can't believe. you lied to me. " Miyagi whispered, taking a step backward. "All this time." Miyagi didn't bother to finish. He simply took one last look at Mitsui, shook his head in disbelief, and ran out the door.
Mitsui winced as the door made a loud bang as it closed. He wanted to run after Miyagi, but realization hit him so hard that he had to sit down.
He thought confessing would finally answer his question if he and Miyagi were just friends or more than friends. It hadn't occurred to him that there was another possibility:
Less than friends.
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Miyagi collapsed on his bed, covering his head with a pillow. He didn't know what to feel right now. He was always the one who told his feelings. He hadn't expected to be on the receiving side of a confession. Now he knew how Ayako and the others must have felt.
What would Mitsui san feel? Miyagi wondered. I can't hurt him. like how I got hurt. What about everything? He remembered the good times they had together at their games, at the park, at Mitsui's house hanging out and out on the rooftop.
I can't lose him. I need him.
What do I do??
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Mitsui fished out the keys from the flowerpot next to the door. He never knew why his parents insisted on putting the house keys among the leaves instead of under the rug like normal people do.
Mitsui grabbed the doorknob and strangely, it opened, indicating that it was already unlocked. Mitsui's face bore a look of confusion and mild panic as he slowly opened the door. The windows were opened and the television was on.
"Hey." He heard a familiar voice greet him. When Mitsui came closer, he was Miyagi sitting on the sofa, with the TV remote in hand.
"What are you doing here?" Mitsui meant it in an inquisitive way, but a tone of annoyance crept through his voice.
Miyagi shrugged. "Why not? I mean, I always come in and out as I please."
"This is not exactly one of those days.." Mitsui said, finally stopping beside the couch.
Miyagi looked at the remote, until he found the button to turn the TV off. The loud chatter on the TV disappeared, replaced by a cloud of dread and silence.
Miyagi broke the silence by saying, "You are an idiot."
"What??" Mitsui asked, astounded.
"Please. sit down. we need to talk."
Mitsui sat down slowly. "Look. if this is about yesterday."
"Of course it's about yesterday.." Miyagi summoned all his courage and looked at Mitsui in the eye. "Why did you have to keep it from me?"
"Because I knew it would end up like this."
"Like what?"
"I mean. you.." Mitsui stopped. He didn't really give this scenario much thought.
Miyagi laughed. "You don't know me THAT well. why? Did you think I would reject you?"
"Well.yes." Mitsui admitted. He can't lie, not when Miyagi was being brutally honest.
"I thought about that too." Miyagi looked at the couch and started to trace the patterns with his fingers. "Then I thought about how I got rejected.how I got hurt. how you got hurt.then I thought about how Aya-chan didn't even give me a chance to show her how I feel." Miyagi's voice was starting to get shaky. "Mitsui. I don't want to get hurt anymore.it's too painful."
"I never meant to do that. "Mitsui shook his head. "I thought telling you how I feel was the best thing to do. I would be lying if I said that I want to be just friends."
Miyagi moved nearer towards Mitsui. "And I would be lying if I said I didn't care about you and I didn't need you."
"Ryo..ta."
"And that's what made it so hard for me! I kept thinking that if I hurt you, I'd destroy everything between us and I don't want that to happen. We had some good times together after we became friends. I didn't want to lose all that so I thought that maybe I should take a chance with you.to give a relationship with you a try.." Miyagi said, moving a little bit closer again.
Mitsui looked at Miyagi intently. "You did?"
Miyagi nodded. "But then I thought. wouldn't it be difficult? You're a guy. I'm a guy. I'm not used to all of that. I began thinking what other people would say. what I had to give up. whether the relationship would work or not. if I can handle it.. If we'd fight a lot.
"Look. if you don't want to. you don't have to.not for my sake."
Miyagi shook his head. "No. it's okay." he looked up and smiled at Mitsui. "You said everything would be fine. right?"
"I did." Mitsui said.
Miyagi placed his hand on Mitsui's hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "I thought of how hard it would be. but the problem was. I forgot one thing."
"What thing?" Mitsui looked at their hands and entwined his fingers with Miyagi's.
"I didn't have anything to worry about after all. you were right.."
Mitsui looked at Miyagi confused. "About what?"
Miyagi's smile grew wider. "I realized.. That everything about us.. It IS perfect." he said, his voice barely audible at the last word, as he felt the impulse to cry again. "I was just too absorbed in my own world to see it."
"Ryota." Mitsui smiled happily for the first time for what seemed like forever. He moved closer and held Miyagi, relieved when the shorter boy did not pull away. "I love you."
Miyagi smiled, rested his head on Mitsui's shoulder and gave his hand another squeeze, but he didn't say anything. This suited Mitsui just fine. He knew it would be a long time before he would hear Miyagi say those words to him, but he knew all it would take is time and frankly, he didn't care.
All that matters to him is that he knows, they are and always will be. more than just friends..
OWARI
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Whee~!! Yeah! Finally I got to writing! Yeah!! The idea for this fic is from 98 degrees' song, "Why Are We Still Friends?" I hope you liked this fic. I wrote it starting from 1:00 in the morning, so it would probably stink. but all the same, please let me know ^___^ MitMiya forever!! Hahaha. just saw that MitMiya was neglected here in FFN. hmmm. not good. not good at all!! Please review I ask of you!!!