A/N: So this is my first songfic! At least I think its considered a songfic. Uhh, well it has lyrics of the song Don't Go by Bring me the Horizon. ;D Does that make it a songfic? I don't know because I haven't read too many before. Oh well. Regardless, I hope you like it! ^_^
I was raised in the valley, there was shadows and death.
Got out alive but with scars I can't forget.
Nezumi knew that he was dreaming. Even though he was aware of this fact and knew nothing here was real, parts of the nightmare were still as vivid and tangible as they were from his memory.
The forest was a blur of green and black around him. His heart beat furiously in his ears as he ran on; his legs were numb with fatigue but he pushed himself onward anyway. His pursuers' footsteps followed closely behind. The only thing he knew was that his parents and the rest of the forest folk were dead—or rather, murdered. It was only adrenaline and instincts of self-preservation that drove him forward.
There were few things that let him know this was a dream. First of all, the mere fact he was in the forest signaled to him that it wasn't real. Each time he had this dream, he was in a different place. As he ran now, the forest was randomly changing, and even though he knew it was the forest he grew up in, he kept getting lost.
Secondly, his attackers' faces were usually blurred and fuzzy. He never knew who his attackers were. However, occasionally they'd appear as people he knew, which sometimes made the dream scarier than if they had undistinguishable faces...
Suddenly, Nezumi tripped over a tree root, hitting the ground hard. He always tripped over something, whether it was a root, a piece of trash, a limb, his own feet, etc. Stupid stupid stupid! he thought. How could I do that? They'll get me for sure now, I'm dead I'm dead I'm dead—
He tried standing up, his adrenaline still coursing through his veins, but slipped on the mud. It hadn't been raining before; suddenly purple rain came crashing down from the sky.
The footsteps behind him stopped. He knew what was coming next. BANG! His shoulder stung with excruciating pain—he fell from his knees face down into the mud, gripping his injured shoulder. He squeezed his eyes shut as he heard the voices behind him say the usual things. They'd gotten him, and now all the vermin were dead! The worthless Forest Folk. One of the voices questioned if Nezumi was still alive, and the other one told him that it didn't matter. The bullet was apparently coated in something special.
With an effort, Nezumi turned his head. He shivered—the rain was icy and piercing, his sopping hair hung in his muddy face, and he felt numb with cold. His shoulder was burning. Out of the corner of his eye he finally caught a glimpse of his two attackers. One was blurry, but—he gasped, horrified. The other one was…was—
—Sion.
His moon-white hair was untidy, and despite the fact that it was raining, it was not wet at all. His clothes were the same—dry, and the ones he usually wore. His eyes were red.
But that's impossible, thought Nezumi. Sion didn't know me until after this happened…and besides, Sion would never hurt me—Sion's too pure for that, too gentle—he would never—
Nezumi's vision was becoming hazy; the dream was falling apart. A scream ripped from his throat.
We all have our horrors and demons to fight.
But how can I win when I'm paralyzed?
They crawl up on my bed, wrap their fingers 'round my throat.
Is this what I get for the choices that I made?
"Nezumi." Sion's voice called his name, and Nezumi watched in terror as the dream Sion's lips moved. However, even though they moved, he realized there was no sound coming from them…where was the voice coming from?
"Nezumi!" Sion's voice came clearer and louder this time. Slowly the forest faded completely and Nezumi's eyes flew open. He sat bolt upright, his heart thudding madly in his chest. He was back in his house again; the familiarity of the piles of books and squeaking mice calmed him. It wasn't real… he told himself.
"Nezumi?" Sion said tentatively as Nezumi's eyes finally rested on him. He was sitting on the edge of Nezumi's bed, his face a mixture of genuine concern, worry, and fright. Finally back to his full senses, Nezumi responded, "What is it? Had a bad dream and couldn't sleep by yourself?"
"No," Sion retorted. "I thought you had a bad dream. You were thrashing around in your sleep."
Nezumi's mind was still weary; suddenly he didn't feel like making a witty reply. "I suppose so. Just some baggage I can't seem to forget, no matter how hard I try." Quickly, he added, "But it doesn't concern you. It's nothing too special. Just forget it."
Sion ignored this. "You know, I heard talking about nightmares helps."
Nezumi looked away from Sion. "Sounds…ridiculous."
He didn't see how talking would help. He knew why he had the nightmares in the first place; he felt guilty that he was allowed to live while his family died. Why was it them instead of him? Why did the people he held dear slip away from him so easily, while he was allowed to continue living? It felt wrong. He felt like he should have died with them.
God forgive me, for all my sins.
God forgive me, for everything.
Sion shrugged. "Well, if you don't want to, then its okay." He got up to leave, but before he could, Nezumi grabbed his wrist.
"Wait..." He didn't care about acting tough right now. Not in front of Sion. He felt physically weak from the dream and didn't know how many more times he could take going through that mental agony. He thought he could withstand anything—anything—but maybe he wasn't as strong as he thought. "Don't go."
Sion stared at Nezumi for a few seconds. "What is it?"
Tell me that you need me because I love you so much.
Tell me that you love me because I need you so much.
"I...I don't want to be alone right now. If you go, I'll be scared again. My…my nightmare. I have it all the time. Its about the night I was shot." Nezumi looked down, almost feeling embarrassed. He'd never shown Sion any signs of weakness before now. He immediately felt stupid and felt his cheeks grow warm.
Nezumi felt Sion's wrist slide through his grip. Sion had moved his hand so that it was now gripping Nezumi's tightly. It was warm. "Not all people are evil. Don't worry, you're safe now."
Meeting his eyes, Nezmi looked up at Sion. How long had he been waiting to hear those gentle words? He didn't even know he'd been waiting for them in the first place.
"I…" he started.
Tell me that you need me because I love you so much.
Say you'll never leave me because I need you so much.
Don't go. I can't do this on my own.
"I love you, Sion."
"I love you, too."
"Can you…stay with me, until I fall asleep?"
Sion smiled warmly. "Of course."
Although Nezumi hated admitting it, Sion was the only person Nezumi would ever share his weaknesses with. He was the only person he ever needed.
Don't go.
Again, Sion ends up being more seme-ish. xD I can't help it, Nezumi's too darn cute, and I really like it when he shows his softer sides to Sion. :3
