In the Dark: A Collection of Short Stories

Cregga's Madness

A/N: Though I am a new author here I have written a lot of fanfiction and I will be posting after a quick rest in which I can reorganize into chapters and stuff like that (I will also re-edit all my work, which will take a while). Anyways, this is a collection of short stories so I won't be constantly working on this, but I'll just post a short story once in a while when I'm not stooped up on other stuff. This collection is rated "K+" because of some coarse language, violence scenes, and some sensuality. These will not necessarily be in this story, but involved in the whole collection as a whole. Anyways, this story is about the great battle that is referred to in The Long Patrol, though the book takes place before the battle starts. The story will be centering from Damug Warfang's to Colonel Eyebright's point of view. Without further ado, let's get this show on the road…

Damug Warfang

We've been at the fire mountain for three days now, our fleet being moored in the peaceful bay. We haven't attacked it, just sizing it up, like two combatants circling each other. I think it's a foolish idea, but no, my father thinks we can take the mountain with ease. We have slightly over thirty hundred while the hares number between one thousand and two thousand. Maybe we outnumber them two to one in numbers, but they outnumber us five to one in valiance.

Cunning is needed to bring down this strong enemy, and I would give plenty of mine at the war councils, but no, my stupid dad keeps on prattling off that I'm underage and since Byral's slightly older (he doesn't add that it's also because he's the favorite) he is allowed at the war councils. What balderdash!

The bowsprit that I lean on is sparkling clean, but it won't be so eye throbbing once we've gone through some violent encounters, or it might even be under the sea, with our corpses swimming along it. And mine could very well be along them. But no, I'm too smart for that. Gormad may charge in front of his forces, illumining that a leader with such courage inspires valiance in his troops. But then what use is a leader if he is slaughtered at the first sword stroke?

"Whatcha doing, ya big mackerel," calls out my hare-brained brother (on second thought the mountain hares are smarter than him) who had crept up behind me. He then cracks down and starts cracking out guffaws at his joke. Oh, jeeze what drollness!

"Don't laugh to hard, you might crack," I warn him, smirking. He doesn't hear me, he's still rolling around on the recently scrubbed deck. A thought pops in my mind. Byral always tries to beat me up, but I never really get to strike back at him-now here is my chance when nobody's looking. Thrills of wickedness arched down my spine!

A booted kick from my foot left him breathing hard, staring surprised at me. My hands, clenched in a fist, were smacked down on his bulbous belly. His torso arched up, and I grabbed his neck, smacking his head against the bowsprit. He shuddered with pain. I hauled him by the scruff of his neck into a cabin door. He peeled away, splinters pricking his whole body. I was about to repeat the action again, when a fist smacked into the side of my head.

Gormad Tunn had helped the bruised Byral to his feet, and now he howled with rage at me using incoherent syllables. Spit flecked my face. I knew what was to happen next. Was a brief moment of joy really worth this?

-Colonel Eyebright

Oh barnacles, and confounded barnacles! Or rather vermin, and confounded vermin! The bally blighters always think they've got the force and cunning to rule the land! Oh, alright so these bubbleheads do outnumber us by two to one and the mountain's never had as many hares in the last flippin' generation!

Gormad and his spawn have done nothing but just jolly stand around and jaw all day. I'm egging Lady Cregga to attack, but she keeps on blubbering about waiting for the bally time. I'll give the blighters time. All us hares are getting rambunctious of our closed quarters (we can't walk a few paces without knocking down something) and no spirit of war when there could be an absobally-flipppinglutely battle going on!

"To arms!" sounds a ringing cry. Yes! I buckle on my abbasi and a bilbo. I also grab a few javelins and rush outside on the balcony.

The beach is stewing alive with hundreds of rows of soldiers, chanting a dreadful war cry and waving their weapons like crazed baboons. Hares on the balcony begin going to their weapons. As the highest commanding officer, I am supposed to lead the troops.

"Archers, slingers, and javelin throwers, release your airborne weapons," I commanded in my best military voice. "Release, then fall back and let row of shield-carriers to the front!"

Carrying a few javelins myself, I added to the attack; I was awarded by death cries. Come on, I taunted the enemy silently, Show me what you've got!

A few archers retaliated from the army below-our attack had not made a dent in the army. "Bring me the boulders, " I snapped in a brisk tone. In seconds boulders are mounted on the ramparts. My soldiers push them and they plummet, squashing the enemy warriors. That was when I noticed that a few troops had started trying to smash through the entrance. It was really a feeble attempt, but I couldn't let any attack stem us.

"To the gate," I hollered, and set off with some soldiers in hot pursuit…

-Damug Warfang

"If this attack was any weaker, I'd send my grandma to finish off Gormad," I informed Lugworm.

We were at the back of the army. This was part of my punishment. I was supposed to be embarrassed by being neglected as a fighting beast, and everybody would laugh at me for such cowardice. I didn't care. With any luck, I'd be the one laughing over Gormad's or Byral's dead body. I didn't want to join in such a weak attack anyways. If not for our soldier quantity, the Rapscallions would have been wiped centuries away from the surface of this planet.

Shrieks of pain and surprise echoed as the party at the entrance was ambushed (idiots). Thirty scores of hare soldiers poured out of Salamandastron, hacking furiously with sabers and baselards, thrusting with pikes and lances, bludgeoning with maces and iron clubs. The troops around me fell back at an alarming pace, and I found myself at the front of the regiment.

Since I was the present commander of these troops (I didn't know where the heck Byral and Gormad fled) I decided I might as well do them a good turn. "Loose arrows and other missiles!" I shouted above the din. "Kill as many enemies as possible before engaging!" I caught a hare from behind and swiftly slit his throat with my claw. He didn't have time to respond. I tore his saber from his deceased grasp and walked away. I'd killed a hare. That was more than others had done or would do, and I decide it was satisfying for me.

Unfortunately fate wouldn't have it my way. A trio of da#$ed hares were going after me with thoughts of avenging their companion as I made my way to the good ol' back of the army. But they were gaining on me dreadfully fast. The leader slashed at me with his blade, and I sidestepped the swing just in time. Turning quickly I smacked him a good one on the side of his head.

I should have kept on running when I had the chance. The seasoned hare recovered in an eye blink and his hind legs pummeled into my abdomen. I kneeled over in pain and my adversary smote my brains with the flat of his blade.

The chaos around me swirled in a single cover of suffocating darkness…

-Colonel Eyebright

"EULALIAAAAAA!" The single, gigantic cry made the earth tremble as our lady badger, Lady Cregga charged into the never-ending mass of vermin. She was like a bally tsunami, calling death to the killers she threw herself upon, her great pike thrusting, stabbing, slashing, and parrying. Those who weren't killed or injured by her maniacal swings, she just jolly squished with her hulking bulk or cracked their skulls with a powerful kick. Myriads of vermin clambered on her, stabbing with their weapons, drawing some blood. But that didn't stop Cregga, oh ye bet it didn't.

She shook herself in fits, throwing off the warriors on her back, and continued surging through the army. The Major Perigord tapping a paw on my shoulder, interrupting me. He showed me an unconscious, young rat.

"Found this blighter as a flippin' commander, sah," he saluted. "Took him a 's a prisoner of war. Any order's, sah?"

'You can flippin' throw him in the sea, for all I jolly care, sah,' was about to be my instant reply, but I thought better about it. "Mount him on the ramparts, hold a dagger to his neck, and tell those bally vermin that they better stop this whasamacalit chaos, or their leader is gonna' be jawing with the barnacles in a few moments," was what I actually said.

Just as Perigord saluted and went on his way, another scum charged me. Jeeze, the flippin' nerve of young un's these days. I took him down with a kick at his groin, and then flipped him aside like a rag. "Better luck next time, sah."

It was just about then that I glanced at shore and my jaw dropped to my feet. The sky was darkening and the waves had begun rising higher. Talk about confounded tsunamis! I grabbed Sergeant Clubrush who was fighting alongside me. "Get every hare inside the palace, some tsunamis are breeding up by the sea," I rapped into his face. "I'm going after Lady Cregga." I left him spinning, and started sprinting alongside the bloody beach…

-Damug Warfang

"What the?" I began sputtering alive as the hare that had defeated me started dragging me up the stone stairs. "Where am I? Yeah, I'm talking to you, ye big buff! I'm the-" My voice trailed off as I was supposed to say the name of my exalted father. That would not be a good idea. "I'm just a common soldier," I concluded. "I was forced to join this army, after the Rapscallions burned the village I lived in and murdered my family!" I began wracking a few sobs at the fake memory. I had begun talking in such earnest that I had actually started to believe myself a bit.

"Yeah, yeah," retorted my enemy. "Tell that to your daddy."

I squinted at him suspiciously. "Oh, yeah my poor little daddy taken to the dark forest at the first strike of those pirate's ambush-"

"Nope, I mean your actual daddy." We had reached a balcony overseeing the bloody chaos below. There stood Gormad and Byral, both bound tight with leather ropes. Oh great.

"Come to join us?" spat out Gormad with utmost hate (hey, no love lost betwixt us).

"At least I wasn't captured in the first blinkin' second," I retorted.

"That's because you were at the back of the force, twiddling your thumbs," Gormad shot back. Byral started to giggle idiotically, but because of his raspy voice, it turned to hiccupping.

"Well, you can settle this reunion later," smirked the hare. "But right now you better get up on your confounded paws and march to the blinkin' rim, straight ahead, sah."

Gormad was not so willing. "I ain't going," he spat out scornfully at such an idea. Hey, maybe Gormad would die before me with some luck!

The hare (Major Perigord, in fact) stopped and sighed. I could understand his feelings.

What happened next surprised me. Gormad, his legs and limbs unusable, hopped over the rim of the balcony using wracks of his body. He wished through the air and squashed a soldier on his descent. Beckoning to a close rat soldier, he shouted a phrase that carried up to us: "Cut my bonds, quickly."

Perigord moved in front of us. "Don't any of you try that, or ye'll find yerself jolly dead, with mah blade between your shoulder blades, sah!"

Byral was just foolish enough to try it. He head butted the sturdy Major in the stomach, but Perigord did not give way. His hind legs shot out and caught Byral on the skull. While Perigord was doing this, I saw my chance and jumped over the ramparts myself.

WHOOOOSH! And then CRACK! I had not been so lucky to land on a living beast. My arm lay useless at my side, blood streaming from the broken limb…

-Colonel Eyebright

"Death to you!" I cried as the vermin before me fell in two halves. I was battling my way towards Cregga, who had not noticed the tsunami. The vermin, however, had. They scurried around in panic, crowding me in close quarters. Cregga, who now found herself a clear path, charged towards the harbor, intent on destroying the fleet.

Gormad Tunn and his army also were also racing towards their ships in a desperate attempt to avoid the giant wave by boarding their ships. They still had a chance.

Cramps had begun to slow me down, but I still pushed on valiantly. I was getting closer…and so was the tsunami. I sighted Cregga and the vermin sloshing through the shallows. The scum were closer…

I reached the shoreline; water sloshed at my ankles. Half of the Rapscallions had boarded a ship, but Gormad was making for the biggest ship, his ship. So was Cregga. It was a race against time.

I heard a sound behind me and was surprised to see both of Gormad's sons when I turned. "How'd you manage to get past ol' Perigord?" I breathed.

"Skill," boasted the taller one.

"Pure luck," muttered the younger one under his breath.

I am sad to admit I never saw the rock that the younger one carried in his hand. It came up in a blur, but I still had enough time to duck. This left me prone to an attack, as the older one realized, and he quickly smote me across the forehead. I collapsed to the ground and the two walked on (DO NOT TELL ANYBODY ABOUT THIS, OR I WILL HAVE YOUR GUTS ON GARTERS!).

I came to my senses just in time to witness the raging tsunami break forth. Some vermin still had not boarded and they were swept up in a wave of howling water. Lady Cregga had holed a ship with her great pike and now she turned as the tsunami swept her up in its grasp…

-Damug Warfang

Gormad's fatally wounded.

I heard the lady badger got away, together with her minion.

It was a failed attack: a thousand of our force drowned in the tsunami, if not more.

I knew it would happen this way, since we landed on the forsaken shore.

Vermin will never prevail. We mean destruction-the gods want peace. It will never turn out this way.

To knock down an idea like Redwall, like Salamandastron, like peace and Good, even the most elite warrior will fail. To kill a lot of goodbeasts is an awesome achievement, and it's the farthest we'll ever get.

I know my fate and destiny already-I saw it in a dream-nightmare would be a more appropriate term-last night. Gormad will die. I will defeat Byral in the fight for the Firstblade. I will travel and fight a war against Redwall and Salaman-dastron.

I will fail of course. But lots of good beasts will fall at my whim. And oh, that lady badger will have her full penalty at my sword. In the dream she was permanently blinded. And if things turn out well, she might even die. Oh, wouldn't that be great!

I shook my fist at the furthering shore. "Watch out you mad badger!" I howled, going blue in the face. "It's femme fatale for you! I won't fail like my idiot father! Don't sleep at night-or you might just find a dagger in your ribs, you bi#$!"

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A/N: Well, that's it. It's not that good, since I wrote it all in one day, and it is somewhat rushed at parts. Well, that's it, and don't forgot to leave a review (click the purple button please).