Disclaimer: I do not own Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. or any related characters.
A/N: This one-shot takes place during the time Fitzsimmons spent at the bottom of the ocean. Kind of missing scene-ish. Enjoy!
They'd gone through so much together. The academy, training, field work. . .they had seen moments in one another's lives that bonded them closer than words or attraction ever could. But to Jemma, that simply made them best friends. Nothing more. Nothing less. She loved him, certainly, but not the way he loved her. He didn't linger in her thoughts as she did in his. Her heart didn't ache to know if he felt the same way as his did.
His heart ached painfully because he knew. He knew he was losing her. Precious time was slipping away from him, and he missed outrageously obvious opportunities to risk it all, to lay it all out on the line. But somehow, it was easier to risk his life than to risk his heart or their friendship the way it was. He cherished their friendship. He knew it could be the core of something much deeper if it worked out. But if it didn't work out, if she didn't feel towards him the way he felt towards her, that beautiful friendship would fall apart and nothing in the universe could ever make it the same again.
Jemma wanted love. She might be socially awkward at times, and too smart for her pretty face, but she was romantic. She wanted prince charming to come along and sweep her off her feet, to make her heart swoon. What if he wasn't that knight in shining armor? He was not some suave agent, or poetic. He was Fitz. Just Fitz. A tech geek. A scientist more comfortable taking gadgets apart than making nonsense conversation.
And then there was Agent Triplett. He was everything Fitz was not. He had earned a special place in Jemma's heart without even realizing it, without ever trying. Not only did that annoy Fitz to no end, it seemed entirely unfair. And it was all because of that bravery he threw into action, that charming smile, and quick witted personality. Actually, if Fitz thought about it, he and Triplett had a lot of attractive traits in common, just in displayed and acted out in different ways. And it so happened that Triplett's way was what caught Jemma's attention.
And now, at the bottom of the ocean, Fitz watched Jemma briefly as she slept. He did not want to be caught staring at her when she came to; however, he could not help but marvel at how peaceful she looked, even after everything that had happened. That is, aside from the scrapes and blood on her face. Her eyelids flickered, as though she were in a dream. Fitz wondered what she dreamed about, when she was not restricted to her duties as an agent. When her imagination and heart could take the reigns of her thinking.
Fitz looked away quickly and tightened his sling. He looked for something to fiddle with to keep his hands and mind busy, to keep himself from panicking. That was one thing he was absolutely wonderful at: panicking. He'd learned that keeping busy pushed the panic aside, shoved into a dark corner where it kept his adrenaline pumping but avoided a heart attack. But he'd made a decision. He was going to tell Jemma how he felt before they died down here, before they ran out of oxygen.
Somehow, someway, he was going to tell her that she was more than just a friend to him. More than just his partner in the lab, his fellow student at the academy.
She was so much more than that.
END