everything changed after that summer. the summer where he betrayed me, the summer where i tired to drown myself because you left me when i needed you the most. how could u just walk away from everything? walk away from me? from your own baby? you left me in the time where i needed you the most. i was so frightened and tired. all i wanted from you was to hold me, to protect me , and u just walked away. did u ever think about what i went through ? what happened to me ? how i felt? probably not. because YOU didn't care, YOU didn't want to take responsibility! i remember the day that u left that stupid, pointless note of urs on the fridge a note which only said " i am leaving , bye". i remember how i went to the beach to get some air, so maybe i wouldn't explode ! but my brain couldn't relax, i keep thinking over and over again. about the baby. about that little human being that was living inside me. how was i going to explain to my family without ur support ? i saw no choice but to kill my self. i saw the ocean and i walked in deeper and deeper every second. till my full body was inside. then i stoped and turned around to look at the beach one more time. i sure was ganna miss it. this was the beach where i met you the first time. where we shared our first kiss. just thinking about you and the first kiss made me cry. these were tears of regret how could i have given my self up for you so easily? sigh. but i couldnt go back now. i had to die, if i didnt die then i would ruin my child's life or should i say our child. so i went in deeper and deeper till my legs couldnt reach the bottom of the ocean and my head was fully in side the water. i remember trying to survive. trying to get oxygen but the waves were strong and I wasn't. when i opened my eyes i thought i was in heaven because it was so white. i always imagined heaven white. but when i actually looked around i realized i was in a hospital.