It was a dark and stormy night. A cliche, perhaps, but a good one. Five men, two holding AKs and on the lookout for cops, the other three loading the car with non-descript briefcases. Lightning flashed, and one of them thought he saw a crouching silhouette. He shook his head, muttering to himself about 'the bloody French', and 'their obsession with gargoyles'. "Let's get a move on, lads. The coppers could be here any minute.", murmured an AK.
"What? How?" exclaimed another.
"You notice Lorenzo is nowhere here tonight? He'll be signing up for a witness protection scheme right about now". Suddenly, a small tune started playing in the darkened alleyway. "F*** tha police comin' straight from the underground" came the voice of Ice Cube. Then the street lamps spluttered and died. Then came a hissing sound and a dull thud. One of the men shined a flashlight on where the sound had come from. What looked like the end of a grappling hook was embedded in the roof of the black Mercedes-Benz. "What the sh** is going on here?" yelled the high-pitched Londoner. Then whatever was on the other end of the grappling hook came whizzing to the ground. Then the flashlight went out. All the while "F*** tha Police still played, amidst sounds and flahes of a vicious brawl and gunfire.
Chief Commissioner Boulard was enjoying his beauty sleep, when his 1950ss telephone rang. Yawning, he picked up the reciever. "Bonjour Commissioner! I am sorry I interrupted your beauty sleep-"
"You damn better be sorry, Leuitenant! I hope this is important.", said the enraged commissioner.
"Well sir i think it is. It's hard to explain, but we could be facing another terrorist attack, or possibly an Akumatized civillian. You should come immediately. I already have Ladybug and Chat Noir on the scene. Sighing, the aged and wearied man hung up.
When he arrived on the scene, Commissioner Boulard crossed himself. There, hanging chained from a street lamp, were three men, a black Mercedes-Benz, all hung as close together as possible, and spray-painted with a white 'Q'. Beside the post, paramedics were checking two mens vitals, while Post-Mortem tried to get the others down. Other police detectives were analysing briefcases. The media were already on the scene. Leiutenant Auguste walked up to him,, along with Ladybug and Chat Noir. "Report!", barked the commissioner.
"Yessir. Civillians discovered this scene at about four a.m, where they were reportedly playing Pokemon Go.". All the policemen in earshot immediately stopped what they were doing and spat twice. " When the paramedics arrived, three of them were dead, the other two barely clinging on to life. There were signs of a brawl and a shoot-out. One of the briefcases that were hanging next to them contained evidence exposed a drug cartel completely hidden under our noses, until about 9 p.m last night, where a certain Lorenzo del Mar went into witness protection. These men were all part of the cartel.". The Commissioner nodded, waiting for the man to continue. "We also found an iPod touch, and a bluetooth speaker, playin F*** tha Police by N.W.A on a repeated loop.". Again all the policemen spat twice. Boulard had a worried frown on his face. "Leiutenant! Limit the media release on this.". The thin man nodded, and walked off. "Ladybug and Chat Noir, what's your opinion on this?'. Ladybug opened her mouth, but Chat cut her off, saying"It must be an Akuma, sir. This pattern of violence befits one of Hawkmoth's cat-nnoying minions.', he said with a grin. Rolling her eyes, Ladybug said:" Apologies for my partner's puns, sir. I believe this is an unknown vigilante, of unknown prowess, perhaps one of Hawkmoth's Akumas, perhaps not.". Boulard nodded, agreeing with her.