Disclaimer: I don't own anything affiliated with One Tree Hill, because if I did Brucas would have been married with kids a long time ago.
AN: AU Season 7. Flashbacks are in Italics.
I dedicate this story to my sister, Rachel who pushed me to write this oneshot when I told her I got the idea from a dream.
Tree Hill is home for me. It's the only place where I've experienced every kind of emotion known to man. When I came back from New York, I had a hunch that Tree Hill is where I'm supposed to be. Yet, the time has come for me to move on and settle back in New York once and for all. Everyone that I know has started moving on and a few of them have already spread their wings around the country.
Nathan and Haley are moving to Charlotte since Nate's been offered a spot playing for the Bobcats. Since they'll be moving, Haley is relinquishing control of Red Bedroom Records and is offering the position to Miranda who's been approved by Peyton. Haley has also been offered a recording deal by Peyton which she intends to pursue once they've moved to Charlotte.
Other than career prospects and the move to Charlotte, the Scott clan has been blessed with the news of Haley's pregnancy. She's four months along and both Haley and Nate are brimming with joy since the doctor confirmed they were having a girl. Jamie is excited that he's having a sibling and he's already proclaiming how he'll be a great older brother which I know he would be.
Nate's been going around announcing that baby girl Scott is going to be a basketball player. He has no idea that Haley and I have made plans to ensure baby girl Scott will grow up being all girly and feminine. I can't wait till she's older, then we can hit the stores, put on make-up and talk about boys.
The ringing of the phone jars me and I grab the phone from my nightstand.
"Hey Tutor Wife, what's up? Yeah, I know…I'm actually in the midst of getting ready. Okay, be there in half an hour. See you soon. Bye."
I put the receiver back before wandering to my closet. I put on a pair of dark blue jeans coupled with a simple red tube. I turn to my dresser and put on a little bit of mascara and gloss before I'm off. As I'm jogging down the stairs, I hear the shrill sound of the phone ringing and I hasten my steps. Before I reached the kitchen, the voice mail picks up.
"Hey Brooke, how are you? We've both been great. The reason I call was to let you know that we'll be visiting New York in a couple of days and were wondering whether you'll be there. We hope to see you and catch up. Anyway, let us know soon. Take care."
The message ends and I stare blankly at the phone as my mind wanders.
Before Alex started working for me, Julian and I were in a good place but once she came along, our relationship started to deteriorate. Soon, we both decided to take a break. I started doubting our relationship when Julian confided to Alex that I could not have kids. I was angry that he ignored my wishes and confided something sacred to her without so much as a blink. Once the anger dissipated, feelings of insecurity consumed me and I became conscious of the fact that maybe Julian and I aren't meant to go further than where we were.
I knew this because my entire relationship with Lucas had filled me with notions of insecurities on whether I was ever good enough for him. When he got together with Peyton, my heart broke and despair washed over me. I always knew at the back of my head that I wasn't the one who was meant for him but that didn't mean I hadn't wanted it to be me. I had prayed with all my heart that he would stay with me till the end. Instead, he left me in a lurch when he kissed Peyton again.
The moment the truth was revealed, I realize that no matter where I stood, Peyton would always be his go to girl. Since, they had already hurt me before; I decided to break it off than go through the whole cheating process all over again. But that didn't mean the break up was any less painful. Lucas was my whole world and Peyton was my sister and in the end I had to give up my happiness for theirs. If I had to do it again, I would still take the same path because that's me. I'm Brooke Penelope Davis and my friends and family mean more to me than my own well-being.
I guess that's the reason why I had always kept Julian at arm's length. Yet, over time, Julian showed me that he was different and he would be the guy to put me back together. The instant I decided to start something with Julian, I knew that a huge part of me opened myself to him because he reminded me of Lucas, the guy who stole my heart.
Ever since we ended our relationship, I've never seen him this happy. In the aftermath of her attempted suicide, Julian looked after Alex. During that time, he saw a different side of her that made him fell for her. From then on, they have been going strong.
Although, Alex is still one my models and my relationship with Julian is somewhat okay, the three of us has never really hung out outside of business. It just feels too weird being around them even though, I'm happy that they have found love in one another.
As soon as they got together, I was reminded of the fact that once again, the guy I'm with has left me for someone else. It irks me that no matter what I do, the guy I'm with will never stay with me till the end.
After getting hitched, Julian and Alex left Tree Hill for LA and now, they're expecting a baby. The news of Alex's pregnancy was a sucker punch to my gut. Once I had accomplished everything that I had wanted, I had hoped to have a child of my own.
This has been a dream of mine after seeing Karen having Lily and seeing Haley with Jamie. Sometimes, I wonder wistfully what would have happened if Lucas and I had a kid in high school. Would we have still drifted apart or would we be going strong like Naley.
A car backfiring pulls me out of my trance and I grab the keys from the counter before heading out the door. I look at my watch and am surprise that I'm running late. I shift the gear into reverse pulling out of the driveway before thundering down the road. Once I've put the car into park, I realize I'm shaking. I try to calm my breathing as I get out of the car slowly. It's been a while since I've thought about the past and the memories have left me winded.
I stand in front of Naley's porch smoothing my top before proceeding to knock. Just as I'm bringing my hand up, the huge oak door swings open.
Haley's at the door and she greets me with a smile on her face. Before I can reply her face turns into a frown as she looks me at clearly. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I just had a lot on my mind. Don't worry, it's nothing major," I said as I head for the dining area.
"Aunt Brooke! You're here," Jamie says as he gets down from his chair. He runs towards me at high speed before I'm being enveloped in a hug. I hug him tightly and hold him close as I bask in the moment.
Once we let go, Jamie drags me to sit beside him. As soon as I'm seated, Nate enters the room.
"Hey Davis, glad you could make it," he says as he grins at me.
"It's not a problem, Nate. You know I'll always be here whenever you guys want me," I answered as I flash him my patented Brooke Davis smile.
Before digging in, Jamie says grace. I'm just about to put some mash potatoes on my plate when Haley scoops a generous helping onto my plate pilling the gravy. I nod my thanks as I take a bite of Haley's mouth-watering food.
Dinner at Naley's was wonderful. We talked about New York and Charlotte and the plans we had. After everyone had stuffed themselves silly with Haley's blueberry pie, we headed to the living room to lounge around.
We sit quietly beside the fireplace enjoying the silence that lingers in the air. Twenty minutes later, the silence is broken.
"Jamie, honey, tell Aunt Brooke good night," Haley orders.
"Okay Mama," Jamie replies as he walks to me. "Good night, Aunt Brooke. I'm going to miss you very much…Please come and visit as much as you can," Jamie says as he holds me tightly.
"I will Jamie and I'm going to miss you so much," I answered as I kiss him on the cheek.
"Let's go, little man," Nathan says as he steers Jamie up the stairs to his bedroom.
Once they're both out of earshot, Haley looks at me. "Nathan and I have been talking and we've decided to have Brooke as our daughter's middle name."
"Thanks Haley!" I squealed in delight. "Wait…What about Sawyer? Doesn't she have Brooke as her middle name too?"
"It doesn't matter…You have always been there for me. We actually thought of using Penelope but we knew how much you hated that name so, Brooke it is. Besides, Jamie has Lucas as his middle name and it's your turn now since we're having a girl."
Just then, Nathan comes along and wraps his arm around Haley. "Did you tell her?"
"Yes, she did."
"I hope you're cool with it. You're also going to be her godmother too," Nathan lets on.
"Really? I thought it would be Peyton since you both are Sawyer's godparents."
"You're a wonderful person and the most amazing best friend a girl could ask for. What's more, you're a kick-ass godmother," Haley supplies.
"Who's the godfather?"
"We both agree it should be Luke," Nathan answers.
"Thanks guys. I can't believe I'm godmother to both your kids," I graciously said. "Wait…Have you guys decided on her first name?"
'Well, we have a few on our mind but it's undecided as of now. We've thinking maybe Isabel, Leah or Emma though Nate is leaning more to Isabel," Haley informs.
"Ooh…Isabel Brooke Scott. Hhm…That's a lovely name," I said testing it out.
- xxx -
An hour later, I'm home. I head to the kitchen placing the keys on the counter before grabbing a mineral water from the fridge. A picture on the fridge catches my eye as I closed the door. I pluck the picture with watery eyes when I see it's a picture of Lucas, Angie and I.
I'm transported to the day I had Angie and images of our time together fills my head.
When I looked after Angie, I knew with clarity that having a kid is what I'm supposed to do. I had everything I needed to provide for a child but the only area I was lacking was the absence of a husband to make my own happy family become a reality.
In many ways, Angie brought Lucas back into my life. Before Angie and Lucas's failed wedding, we were friends but the spark we had between us was gone. Lucas played a huge part in Angie's life and to a certain extent in mine too. Angie came into our lives when Lucas was in a dark place after being left at the altar by Lindsey. The moment she was in my arms, I knew she could be the one to help Lucas get out of his funk and he did crawled out from his deep dark hole with her presence.
Angie was a source of light in Luke's darkening world and when I handed him an olive branch, he held on to it dearly. After that, Luke and I spent almost all of our time together looking after Angie and keeping ourselves company. It was a long time since high school that I felt this close to Lucas, though the time we spent in New York acting as a fake engaged couple was one of my best memories. The best bit about Lucas being here is the feelings I get in my stomach whenever he was near. Although, Peyton and Haley were there for me, it was Lucas who I turned to when I was most in need of help in dealing with Angie.
The first time I went to Luke for help was when I couldn't calm Angie and I had to complete my sketches for my new line. When I arrived at his door looking worse for wear, Lucas just looked at me before stepping aside letting me in. He played with Angie while I finished my sketches and when I looked over at them, I could see how great he was with her and how much Angie adored him.
I knew then that Lucas would be a wonderful father. I've seen him with Lily and Jamie but its different seeing him with Angie who isn't related to him in any way and the way he holds her shows me how much he treasures spending time with her. In that moment, I knew that I was once again falling deeply in love with Lucas and at the end of the night when we curled up together on the couch with me beside him and Angie in his arms, I felt contented and it was like we were a happy family. I remembered him pulling up a blanket to cover me and me shifting to lie on his shoulder as we slept comfortably.
From then onwards, Lucas was the only one I trusted to look after Angie. He came with me to all of her appointments with the doctors and he was there comforting me when Dr. Copeland told us about the surgery and its procedures and risks. Without Lucas, I would not have survived those arduous times.
When Angie's operation was underway, Luke came to the hospital and sat beside me through the whole procedure never leaving until Dr. Copeland announced Angie had made it through the operation. He held me close as I cried tears of relief knowing the little girl that I have been looking after would be okay.
Only when I told him it was okay to leave, that Lucas actually left for his game. I was pleased when he came back later that night to check on us. At that time I had no inkling that he had been suspended and when I found out, I was thankful to Lucas for taking Angie under his wings without any reservation. His actions proved how much Angie meant to him.
Handing over Angie was one of the worst things that I had to give up. I had grown attached to her and for her to be leaving so soon after the surgery tore me up. I left a voice mail for Lucas letting him know Angie was leaving and telling him not to come to see her off as I could not bear for him to see me so wrecked.
After handing Angie over, I sobbed my heart out as I turned to leave. As the crowd parted before me, I saw Lucas standing there looking forlornly at me and in that moment, I felt so grateful to see him.
"You got my message…I told you not to come."
"I know," he says as he gazes at me meaningfully.
"She's gone, Luke."
"I know." He pulls me gripping me tightly in his arms as I cry silently into his shoulders. A while later, he holds me securely to his side as he leads me out of the airport.
Later that day, he came to see me as I sat on the couch holding Angie's purple monkey. He sits beside me asking where is Peyton when I inform him that she's at work. He's surprised to hear my answer and asks why I told him not come to the airport. I replied I hate for them to see me vulnerable. My heart caught in my throat when he said "Well, that's how I see you Brooke…But I think it's kind of beautiful."
He watches me intently before smiling. "I've been thinking about all the things that you have done...for Angie, Rachel and me and all kinds of people. You save people, Brooke Davis, that's what you do. Thanks for letting me share that."
I smile at his proclamation and nod my head.
He gets up to leave telling me to let him know when Angie's safely back home.
Before he leaves, I blurt "Hey Luke...We've been through a lot, me and you but I wouldn't have made it today or a couple of other days without you, so thanks."
"You're welcome."
I gazed at him for a second before handing him the purple monkey. He gapes at me quizzically.
"This is for you," I state as he takes a hold of the monkey. "I love you, Lucas Scott, you know that?"
"I love you too, Brooke Davis," he answers softly.
Once he replied the same, I turned away from him. When I uttered those words, I meant that I still loved him very much since the day I fell for him in high school. When he answered, I knew he only intended it as a friend and that hurt more than I could ever say.
A part of me wanted to scream out loud asking him directly whether he had ever really loved me. But, I kept my mouth shut as I was terrified to hear his answer. It's better if I had no clue than for him to express that he has never really loved me the way he loved Peyton.
I don't think I could survive hearing him voice that to me.
That night, Lucas left Tree Hill with Peyton. I was crushed when Haley and I heard their message, although I quickly recovered to cover my shock and disappointment. I had no intention of ever letting Haley know how I really felt seeing them being together all over again. Thus, I acted happy for them when inside I was dying. A few months later, they got married and had a daughter, Sawyer Brooke Scott before leaving Tree Hill.
The sound of glass shattering brings me out of my stupor and I look down to see shards of glass on the floor. I cleaned it up and grabbed the picture before heading to my room.
Since I'm still keeping the house, I only packed my essential items. I look around my room seeing if I missed anything important before checking my closet. I look through the rows of clothes stopping at a red Brooke Davis Original dress. I knew I had to bring it along and I tugged it from its hanger but instead of falling into my arms, the dress falls to the floor of my closet.
I bend down retrieving the dress when my hand brushes across something. I grab my dress before tugging the object towards me. I'm amazed to see that it's a box. With my dress on my lap, I sit cross-legged on the floor with the box in front.
My breath quickens when I realize it's my Lucas box. I had forgotten that I had hidden it there when Peyton moved in.
I open the flap cautiously before seeing all the letters that Lucas wrote to me and his Keith Scott Motors sweatshirt. The last time I wore it was at Rachel's cabin. I pull out the letters and my fingers trace the curve of the each alphabet, when memories of Lucas flash by.
It's the worst storm to hit Tree Hill and I'm out there trudging in the rain trying to get away from Lucas. I'm pissed to find out he wrote the same line "You're mine forever, Love Lucas."
He doesn't get why I'm pissed and yells "IT WAS A MISTAKE!"
I whirled around screaming "WHICH TIME; WHEN YOU WROTE IT TO ME OR PEYTON?!"
He answers that I shouldn't be mad since I was snooping through his closet before I angrily stomp away.
He catches up to me replying "Know what I think? I think you're trying to sabotage us. Find any reason you can to end it. So that you don't have to worry about getting hurt again."
"The exact same words?!"
He shook his head. "I never sent that letter to Peyton."
"I never sent my letters to you either but they still meant something!"
I stare at him for a moment before asking the question that has been plaguing me since we got back together. "Just tell me, why me this time. Why not Peyton?"
He responds "I can't say anything bad about Peyton. She's my friend, and she's your best friend!"
"That's okay; you can say bad things about her."
He shakes his head. "The truth is I care about Peyton."
I retaliate "Then what is the difference?"
He declares "The difference… the difference is I love you, Brooke. I wanna be with you, not Peyton."
I eye him dejectedly. "But why? I need to know why."
When he confessed why it was me he wanted, my heart melted. The words he uttered were like a song on a continuous loop playing in my head over and over again. "Because you… kink your eyebrow when you're trying to be cute; because you quote Keimoo, even though I've never actually seen you read! And because… you miss your parents but you'll never ever admit that. And because… I've given exactly two of these embarrassing speeches in my entire life… and they've both been with you." "I mean that's… gotta mean something, right? And because we're both… gonna get pneumonia… but if you need to hear why I love you, I can go on all night."
"You did pretty good," I answered before stepping closer and kissing him.
We were soaked to the bone and yet we stood under the pouring rain kissing feverishly to our heart's content. That was the night we made love for the first time since we got back together and it was passionate, tender, loving and everything that I had wanted it to be.
Another memory pops in my head and I see us arguing on the dance floor at Naley's second wedding before I leave for the back room. The entire conversation we had flickers by and it's like I'm having the same conversation all over again.
"I need you to listen to me, okay? I'm sorry you didn't know about the kiss and I'm sorry for springing it on you but I meant what I said. It didn't mean anything," he recites.
"A kiss always means something."
He counters "Okay, you're right but it wasn't a romantic moment! And you would know that if-"
"If what, I was there? As you so sweetly pointed out at the party- the party that I threw for you- I wasn't there, was I?"
"Is it possible for you to forgive me? I forgave you," he states.
"For what?" I shouted.
"For sleeping with Chris Keller," he divulges.
The words he spat were a slap to my face. I began to cry uttering "You know what Lucas, I loved you for that. You had such grace in that moment that I fell in love with you all over again. I can't believe that you would use it now as a bargaining chip."
"I'm not – I'm not – I'm not. I just - I need you to trust me and believe me when I tell you that my heart is with you. But a part of me feels like ever since we got back together, you've just been waiting…waiting to PUSH ME AWAY!" he exclaims.
"Oh great! You kiss Peyton AGAIN and I'm PUSHING YOU AGAIN!"
A minute later he says "I love you Brooke. I don't know how else to say it."
"How about, how you show it? I am not pushing you away Lucas, I am holding on for dear life! But I need you to need me back! I mean, why didn't you tell me about the kiss and why didn't you call me while you were away and why won't you ever just let me all the way in?!" I sobbed as I pounded his chest with my fists.
Once I calmed myself, I said "We have to go give our toasts now. About love."
"Please don't be mad at me Brooke," he says.
I regard him despondently before answering "I'm not mad, Lucas. Not mad." I'm actually devastated that the boy I love has no clue who I really am.
The next scene that comes to me is the last time we were in close proximity as we danced our last dance.
"Did you miss me while you were away?"
He confessed "Everyday. I was just angry and upset about Keith but that doesn't mean I didn't miss you Brooke. Because I did."
"I needed to hear your voice. There was just so much stuff going on with me and-"
"What kind of stuff?" he cuts me off.
Instead of replying, I kiss him with everything I have. He kisses me back fervently and I realize with a pang in my heart that he knows that he has already lost me.
I break the kiss and leaned into his embrace. He holds me close as we swayed to the music.
The memories end and I'm shocked to see that I'm clutching his sweatshirt tightly in my hands. I close my eyes and inhale deeply. I shake my head to clear my thoughts as I look at the box blankly. Next thing I know, I'm pushing it back to its rightful position and closing the sliding panel of the closet.
I turn away looking around my room before heaving my suitcases out the door. As I inch my way towards the stairs, my heart thuds painfully in my chest. I push myself forward when I realize that my feet are rooted to the spot.
My heart speaks to me saying I need to turn back and take the box with me but my head says although, it's painful, I should leave it here in Tree Hill. That's when I grasped the fact that if I ever wanted to move forward, I had to let go of everything that has been holding me back. In order to start anew, the first step I had to take is to leave the guy that has always been a part of me behind.
With a heavy heart, I continue descending down the stairs. Once I reach the foyer, I look around the house once more before twisting the knob to leave.
- xxx -
A few hours later, I'm in New York. I head towards the baggage carousel and grab my bags.
I've only taken a few steps forward before the ringing of my phone cuts through the air. Instead of stopping, I continue walking while scrambling to get my phone from my bag. Just as my fingers closed in on my phone, I bumped into a tall figure.
I started apologizing profusely before looking up. When I looked up, I find myself staring at the person in front of me and my mouth snaps shut. I open my mouth to say a word before slamming it shut again. There are a million questions running through my head and as much as I wanted to articulate them, I could not as my voice has deserted me.
I see him opening his mouth and before he gets the chance to say anything, my voice comes back and I stutter "What are you doing here?"
He laughs before answering "Funny running in to you. I actually came to New York to see you before leaving for Tree Hill. I went by your place and your assistant said you're in Tree Hill, so I decided to grab a flight today to see you, Haley, Nate and Jamie."
"I actually just left Tree Hill for good today. I'm working full-time in New York now."
"Why what happened?"
"Naley's leaving for Charlotte and everyone I know has left or is leaving Tree Hill soon, so I decided to leave since there's no one left. Besides, I left the running of my store to my assistants."
"Wow! A lot sure has happened since I left," he exclaimed.
"Yeah, they sure have changed," I whispered.
He gives me a piercing look before pulling me into his embrace. As he circles his arms around me, he murmurs "Gosh, I have missed you so much, Brooke Davis."
I smile and leaned into his embrace. I snuggle contentedly in his arms and believe maybe its fate that we met. After all, the only thing that has been occupying my head today is memories of him.
I can't wrap my head around the fact that he's here in front of me after almost 2 years of being apart. I grinned happily pulling him closer to me. It's weird that just when I decided to leave Tree Hill for good, I bumped into the one guy that I have always loved. Now that I'm in his arms, I don't want him to let go.
I lay my head against his chest hearing his heart beating. I push my face lightly against his shirt mouthing "People who are meant to be together will always find their way in the end."
Thanks for reading and reviews are appreciated :)