"What the fuck Sam?" Dean roared as he pushed Sam into the motel room.
"It worked didn't it?" Sam yelled back, shucking his coat off and tossing it on the chair.
"Yea, but it left me wide open and if I wouldn't of realized it, my neck would be separated from my body at the moment not that you care do you?" Dean was practically shaking as he stripped his own jacket off.
"What are you talking about of course I care" Sam asked facing Dean.
"Oh really, that's why you tell me you want me, tell me you want to be with me then I see you being fucked against the wall out side a bar"
"Sure like you don't go off and find available cock every chance you get or are you going to pull that bull shit that it's just my cock you want"
Red flashed across Dean's vision as he grabbed the front of Sam's shirt and shoved him into the wall. The thump of Sam's head hitting the wall should have stopped Dean, but he was to far pissed off to care.
"You know what you fucking prick, it is just you I want," Dean growled. "I have done everything always to make sure that you were protected and safe and you left me high and dry with a pissed off father just because you wanted to be normal"
"And I would have been if you wouldn't have come back into my life" Sam growled back, then groaned as Dean's fist came into contact with his stomach.
"Oh I'm so fucking sorry that I wanted your help to find dad, I guess it was just my mistake that maybe family was a little important to you"
"Dad told me to get out and you wouldn't stand up for me so why would I think I was important"
Dean growled again and pulled Sam from the wall and tossed him face first on the bed, where Sam only had a second before Dean was on his back, pinning his arms behind him.
"Lets see how about all the times that I would take the wrap when something YOU did went wrong?" Undoing his belt, Dean manhandled Sam over and tied his wrists to the head board.
"What about when I would plead with him to let us stay a few more weeks if you were close to finishing school JUST so you could make sure you made to the next grade?"
An annoyed huff came out of Sam's throat as Dean got his boots off and undid his pants roughly.
"Oh like you had to do anything hard, you were always dad's favorite"
"Yea right," Dean snarled, pulling Sam's pants and boxers off. "That's why he put all of the responsibilities on me right? Why he left me alone when I was just a little over 6 to take care of YOU"
"Well you did a great job didn't you? of all the people you could fuck you go for your brother"
A coldness ran through Dean and his hand struck up to Sams throat, squeezing enough to make Sam gasp.
"Shut up, I told you to NEVER use that against me I love you, you fucking asshole and it took me so long to come to terms with that and you pull that now" Dean's tone was ice cold.
A look of panic passed over Sam's features at what he just did. Trying to apologize, Dean just squeezed his wind pipe shut again till Sam was light headed.
"You don't get to say another word," Dean said just above a whisper. "If this is so wrong why do you love it so? Huh? Am I raping you Sammy? Do you not want me to touch you, kiss you, make love to you?"
"Dean I"
"I still didn't say you could talk"
Grabbing a tie from the duffle near the bed Dean shoved it passed Sam's lips and tied it tight. The rough pull of it making tears spring to Sams eyes as Dean undressed himself and pushed Sams legs apart, moving between them. Grabbing the lube from the bedside table, he slicked up two fingers and pushed them into Sam. Letting out a whine of pleasure and pain Sams back arched off the bed as Dean moved his fingers at a grueling pace.
"Do you not want this huh?" Dean asked, tears of frustration and pain filling his eyes and spilling down his cheeks. "Do you want me just to be your brother again?"
Sam shook his head.
"Liar" Dean snapped, adding another finger quickly.
Sam shook his head again only to whine as Dean bit his collarbone, hard.
"They why aren't I the only one you go to huh? Why do you still get fucked by random men? Do you want to get an STD and give it to me?"
Pulling his fingers out, he grabbed the lube and added a palm full to his cock and arranged him self quickly. Pressing in quickly, it was nearly to much for Sam who sobbed around the gag, arms pulling at the restraint.
"You want me to die don't you?" Dean gasped, fucking into Sam too fast and hard. "Never want your filthy brother to touch you, fuck you. You never wanted my love did you, just accepted it for some reason"
Tears were falling from both the Winchesters eyes as Dean grabbed Sams cock and started jerking him. Leaning down Dean's teeth found Sams collarbone again, biting him hard enough to break the skin. With a muffled shout Dean felt Sam come between them and the extra pressure around him making him fall over the edge as well.
Letting go of Sams length Dean leaned his forehead against the collarbone that wasn't bleeding and sobbed.
"God damn it Sammy I fucking love you with all my heart, why do you do this to me?"
Pulling out of Sam, Dean headed to the bathroom and cleaned himself up quickly, then grabbed a towel. Moving back to Sam, he cleaned him up gently, tears still falling down his cheeks. Unhooking the belt after tossing the towel on the floor he put his head in his hands and let out a choked sob.
"Dean" Sam's voice came from behind him as he felt the bed shift as Sam sat up.
"Just fucking leave, you're good at that" Dean said bitterly.
"No Dean I'm sorry"
"Don't lie to me, just go spend the night with someone that you actually want to be with"
"That's you Dean"
Dean turned and looked at Sam. "Then why?"
"I don't know, really I don't," Sam sighed and looked down at the sheets. "The last time I was in a serious relationship, look how it ended"
"Yea, it was my fault remember?"
"No it wasn't and I shouldn't have said that, since I know it wasn't"
Dean stayed silent as Sam picked at a loose thread on the sheets. "I do love you Dean and I won't see anyone anymore, I promise"
"Why should I believe you?"
"Just, please believe me and I'll prove it, I swear I will"
Dean let out a sigh and nodded a little.
"I'll believe you for now, but I swear you do anything to make me doubt you I will become your brother again and that's it" Dean said, moving to lay on the bed, facing away from Sam.
The younger Winchester moved behind him, wrapping his arms loosely around him.
"Good night Dean, I love you" Sam whispered into the skin of his neck.
"Love you too Sammy always have"
~*~*~*~Authors Note~*~*~*~
Well screw you Gabriel, why are you making me have feelings like this. He wanted Crying, angsty smut and here it is.
T_T Why Gabe why?