Long, Long Time
Amanda was driving home after a trying day at the Agency, glad to be away from Lee for the first time in years. All day they had been cooped up in Q Breau doing spring cleaning and for some reason Lee had been moody around her. He had been grouchy and short tempered, reverting back to his old ways of dealing with her. Just when she thought he was beginning to care for her he pushed her away. She would never get a break when it came to Lee Stetson, would she?
Her mother always told her that love conquers all and that was what Amanda believed. She even had the faith that someday Lee would see her as a woman, not his working partner. She had always know about his past and the women that had occupied it, be she held on to the belief that despite his past she would be able to get him to love her in return. Over and over he proved her wrong, saying any closeness they experienced was just part of the assignment, nothing more. Once when he said that after a near kiss that had nothing to do with an assignment she had replied 'not exactly' and walked away, hoping he would get the message. But Amanda learned that Lee had a thick skull.
Amanda had done everything short of seduction to get Lee to truly notice her, to get him to admit what she glimpsed in his eyes. At moments she would catch a burning glance, a protective touch, or taking her hand in reassurance, and this would give Amanda some hope that the 'One Man Show', the 'Loner' might, in some way need her. Still, despite his actions, Lee had begun to distance himself from her lately, almost as if he were afraid of her. Her, a housewife from Arlington, Virginia; it was nearly enough to make her laugh.
Keeping her wits about her Amanda hid the truth as well as she could: she had fallen in love with Lee Stetson. In her heart she knew that she would love him for a very long time, but she knew it was time to move on.
Earlier that day Lee had snapped at Amanda for no reason, hurting her deeply. Being the strong woman she was she bit back her tears and went about her day, deliberately avoiding Lee. She didn't know why it had hurt so much to hear a harsh word from him, Lee never having let her near him in any outside way besides work. Yes, he would always give her a good word, but ever a meaningful one that would make her feel worthy. And it was 'Scarecrow's' approval she wanted the most of all. He was always out on the town, being the perfect Player with hearts, failing the one woman that really mattered.
Amanda was waiting for the right time to leave the Agency, to get away from the man who unwittingly had her heart in the palm of his hands. She couldn't live everyday seeing the man she loved and knowing that even if she told him it wouldn't make a difference. That was one of the many reasons why agents were discouraged from falling for co-workers; that they would pay the ultimate price of losing either way they went. She wondered how many times she would have to suffer before learning her lesson that men were liars at heart, first Joe then Lee. Lee. A love that never was nor never would be.
Amanda knew at that very moment Lee would be opening an envelope on his desk, reading her words that she had wrenched out of her soul. Her resignation. Along with it a note of her feelings, pouring her heart out to him. She was gone, never looking back at the man who made her who she was. It was best to make a clean break.