A Grand Detour

Summary: Alice shows Tarrant what mischievous girls from London do to stay cool. This is a prompt from the Alice in Wonderland Writing Challenges Discussion Forum here on FFN: "Only mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the noonday sun." (Noel Coward)

Genre: Romance

Rating: M to be safe; contains non-explicit adult themes

Disclaimer: Written for fun; only borrowing the characters for a story, not for gain. But if Disney wishes to pass the rights over to me, I won't complain! ;)

Story Notes: definition: sacchariferous – containing sugar. I think it's a fun, Underland-type word! In this story, it is used as the name of a sweet fruit.

A/N: This prompt was HARD. Not quite sure I nailed it, but at least I tried. =) Happy reading!

Summer was thoroughly enjoying his stay Underland, as Time was being lazy and let the days drag by. There were many festivals and celebrations on warm summer evenings, but as the season reached its peak, the afternoons became unbearable and were mostly spent indoors.

Today was especially hot, as there wasn't even a slight breeze. Yet somehow Alice found herself walking next to Tarrant on the path to Marmoreal in the middle of the day.

They had spent the morning in their home, hidden in the shade of trees, in an attempt to avoid the heat. Tarrant had brought Alice a glass of ice cold sacchariferous juice and asked if it helped keep her cool.

Alice gave her husband a grateful smile, "Yes, thank you!" She took another long, slow sip. "Mmm… delicious."

"Good," Tarrant clapped his hands and abruptly stood up smiling, "now that you're cool, we can leave for Marmoreal."

"What? Now? It's the middle of the day!" Alice protested. Alice was wearing a lightweight, strapless, linen dress he had fashioned for her that fell just below her knees. But even so, she still had to sit by an open window and continuously fan herself to stay comfortable. The idea of walking around in the noonday sun was not appealing in the least.

"Of course it's in the middle of the day, Alice. We couldn't quite leave at the beginning of the day as that has already passed and leaving at the end of the day wouldn't work at all as the day would already be over a—"

"Hatter!"

He cleared his throat, "Thank you."

"Tarrant, you have to be mad to go out at this time of day!"

Tarrant giggled, "Of course I'm mad, Alice, and so are you."

She tried to protest and negotiate, but she knew when she was defeated. It was a half a day's walk to the castle and they had promised Queen Mirana that they would join her for dinner this evening. She would go, but she wouldn't be happy about it.

And so, Alice found herself on this hard dirt path in the middle of Underland.

This length of the route was mostly grassy fields with trees few and far between. Luckily, there was a pond a few yards ahead where they could stop and get water.

The pond brought back memories for Alice, and none of them involved quenching her thirst. London summers could be considerably warm, and she often found herself on the banks of a pond with a set of very improper twins. The two would tease her about not getting in, but Alice didn't want to risk getting caught.

Alice smiled at the memory and how she used their secret against them at the failed engagement party. Suddenly, she had an Idea. Ordinarily, she would think of it as a Bad Idea, scandalous even, but today she would blame it on the heat.

As Tarrant bent down to refill their canteens, Alice took off her sunhat and tossed it over to him as she walked further down the bank.

"Alice? Why did yo—" Tarrant's breath caught as he looked up and saw his wife shimmying out of her dress.

Alice stood several feet away with her back to him. She looked over her shoulder at him and winked before letting the dress fall to the ground.

"Alice, ye nae wearin' knickers."

"It is far too hot to wear undergarments, Tarrant," Alice's eyes flittered down to the growing bulge in his pants, and smiled. "Or any clothes at all," she added shrugging her shoulders.

With that, she turned back fully away from him and removed the ribbon and pins from her hair, causing the golden curls to cascade freely down just past her waist. Aware that Tarrant's eyes were watching, Alice ran her hands through her hair, shaking her head slightly side to side. She then stepped out of the pool of clothing at her feet and walked straight into the water.

Ankle deep, Alice cupped her hands and bent over at the waist to take a drink. Through the curtain of her hair, she could see that Tarrant had discarded the canteens and was loosening his cravat.

Continuing her tease, Alice took another handful of water, but this time dripped it over her body. She started with her legs, letting the water fall freely down her thighs. She then wet her arms, rubbing the water over her skin. Turning toward Tarrant, but not making eye contact, she released another handful of water down her stomach so it flowed straight to her womanly folds.

"I think I'm going to go a little deeper," Alice teased, as Tarrant walked over to the bank closest to where she was standing. He had shed his waistcoat and the crotch of his pants looked like it was going to burst at the seams.

Alice once again turned away from him and walked waist-deep into the pool of water. The water was cold in comparison to the dry heat in the air, and her nipples stood at attention. Taking advantage of this, she turned back toward her Hatter and splashed water over her breasts. She cupped them, and allowed her thumbs to roam over her hard peaks.

Even in the middle of the pond, she could feel the electrical tension building between both of them. Tarrant was unbuttoning his shirt, and Alice took the time to take in his firm chest as it was revealed to her. She could hardly wait any longer, and she knew that he couldn't either.

"Tarrant?"

"Aye?" he growled.

"It's too hot to stand in the sun. I think you need to come cool off."

Tarrant needn't to be told twice. Alice bit her lip in anticipation as he tossed off his clothes with lightning speed and dove into the water. He grabbed her up in his arms and gave her a passionate kiss filled with all the desire that had been building during her tease. She eagerly returned the kiss with just as much fervor.

The Hightopps would definitely be late for dinner.