"Manticore Burn"

AUTHOR: Mystic25

Summary: Dark Angel characters go off on each other. Humor piece.

Rating: PG13 for things your momma probably warned you about.

A/N: I saw the phrase "Manticore Burn" on a Dark Angel Message board and the only thing I could think of was people trading insults. So I started playing around and scary enough I came up with this little ditty. If something doesn't appear to be laughable then you're just not on board with my warped sense of humor.

A/N 2: Choices is near completion yada yada, it's been almost eight months but the best things are aged blah blah…running away now. Enjoy my short yarn.

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Lydecker and Renfro

Lydecker: "The real reason, Madame Director, that you chose to go into a covert line of work is because you had to hide yourself after finally realizing someone can be that ugly."

Renfro: "You know what Deck? You didn't have to get out of Delta Force because you drank too much; they just got tired of you blowing the hell out of everything except the objective."

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Alec and Zack

Alec: Face it Zackie boy your ego is the only thing you have going on that's big headed."

Zack: "At least I didn't have to breach offset with manual stimulation for some half assed rescue attempt on my last date."

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Max and White

WHITE: "452 you lack any sense of ability, as a fighter and as a woman."

MAX: "From one woman to another Ames, so do you."

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Lydecker and Sondaval

DECK: "Tell me Agent Sondaval, is it hard to look in the mirror everyday and wonder what went wrong?

SONDAVAL: "With all due respect Sir it's not my face that initiates a week of fasting and prayer."

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Logan and Zack

ZACK: "You're nothing but a pathetic simple minded civilian trying to pretend you make a difference in society."

LOGAN: "That's quite a lot of big words coming from a man who didn't even know his own name until he was four."

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Original Cindy and Renfro

Renfro: "You call yourself 'Original Cindy'? Do you honestly believe that people care about you enough to want to know that you're an original?"

Original Cindy: "Do you honestly believe a supposed important sounding name like 'Renfro' is gonna draw any attention away from you bein' a complete bitch?"

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Bruno Anselmo and Herbal

Bruno: "You're such a dooshbag. I can't understand how you believe that your 'It's All Good Philosophy' shit actually works on anyone."

Herbal: "And I cannot overstand tat even with all the crap I be smokin' you still sound like da jackass."

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Original Cindy and Aunt Margo

Margo: "My dear what a lovely outfit you're wearing. I didn't know road kill could clean up so well."

Cindy: "I bet you hear that last remark from men all the time."

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White and Lydecker

White: "For a top class Army Colonel you're built like a fireplug; it's no wonder that you can't do your job without rolling down some hill."

Deck: "At least my job detail doesn't include dealing with circus freak rejects who believe that shaving off all their hair somehow makes them look better."

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Alec and Uncle Jonas

Jonas: "My boy you drain your small amount of intellect in trying to put on such false pseudo airs about your ability to render me the incompetent party in this situation."

Alec: "Only people with small minds use big words Jonas, think abou it if you can."

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Normal and Lydecker

Normal: "Do you honestly plan to insult my intelligence in trying to make me believe a stocky, dumpy little man like you is actually head of a highly classified military run project?"

Lydeceker: "It's no easier to believe then a pasty, librarian rejected middle aged man trying to pretend he has a grasp on anything outside his clothes."

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Max and Logan

Logan: "You have an unrealistic belief that your skills as a soldier are so flawless that men everywhere will piss in their pants when they see you, ignoring the fact that you look more like a impish minded supermodel who got lost in the dark."

Max: "What I look like is no body's damn business but my own Logan. And if you want to see men everywhere piss in their pants and run try reading them some of your poetry."

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Sorry, I couldn't help myself with that last part. Where would this diss session be without the Dark Angel and her Eyes Only guy? But here they'll apologize:

Logan: "Max I behaved liked a total idiot and I'm sorry."

Max: "Now that you got that out of your system how about you feed a female?" heehe…

I'd love any form of review on this. If you flame me on the 'content' of this ficlet I'll just laugh….what content I say? All I see is rambling, so it's supposed to be funny, outside that, not make much more sense.

Peace

Mystic