Dean was pacing back and forth in his room. He was rubbing the back of his neck as he muttered unintelligibly to himself. He had his eyes closed tight and the sound of his heart beat was too loud, so he didn't hear the fluttering of wings, or see Castiel as he appeared in the corner of the room.

For a moment Castiel just watched, fearful for what he was seeing. He had seen this side of Dean before, sure, but only when things were bad; really bad. There were few things in the world that could make Dean Winchester lose his cool.

Dean suddenly stopped his pacing, abruptly looking up and opening his eyes, and without much warning, Castiel found himself stunned by the sadness and pain in Dean's eyes as he looked back. Castiel had seen Dean hurt plenty of times, physically and emotionally, but somehow this pain seemed worse than all the others. The longer Castiel looked into Dean's eyes, the more he had trouble trying to speak, but in the end, it was Dean who broke the silence.

Castiel watched Dean's walls fall back into place as Dean asked, "What are you doin' here, Cas? I thought you were off trying to figure this locked out of heaven thing?" Castiel watched a few emotions cross Dean's face as he spoke, but couldn't read them. He had never been good at reading emotions.

Castiel let out a small sigh before answering, "I am, or I was. I just thought I'd take a few minutes to come and check on you and Sam." At the mention of Sam's name Castiel had no trouble reading the sadness and pain the flitted across the hunter's face. Cocking his head to the side, Castiel asked, "Are you and Sam alright, Dean?"

Castiel watched as a humourless laugh escaped Dean before he said, "Sam's doin' great, thanks to you." Dean did send Castiel a genuine smile before it turned sad, and he continued, "And I'm just great, Cas, never better." Even the Castiel that had first met Dean would have never believed that lie for a second, but Castiel had learned better than to point such things out to Dean. He had never met a more stubborn person, and if Dean didn't want to talk about something, then he didn't. Instead of trying to do the impossible, and get Dean to talk, Castiel decided that instead he would just get to the bottom of it himself.

Dean watched as Cas debated something with himself, before the angel seemed to decide. Dean saw the determined look that Cas often got when he had a goal and nothing would stop him from achieving it. He was going to ask Cas what he was thinking, but before he could the sound of fluttering wings filled the room and Cas was gone.

Slumping down onto the bed, Dean let the sadness from the loss of his angel wash over him. He no longer had the energy to even entertain the thought of fighting off his emotions when he was alone, let alone actually doing it. Putting his hands over his face, Dean let out a stuttered sigh.

Cas watched, invisible, from the corner of Dean's room as the hunter turned onto his stomach, sticking his face into his pillow. Frowning, he realized Dean seemed worse than before; before he had noticed Castiel watching him, but for the life of him, he could not figure out why.

SUPERNATURAL

After watching Dean sleep for a little while, Castiel ventured out into the rest of the bunker. He wasn't surprised to find Sam sitting at a table reading. Sam seemed to be fine, like Dean had said. He looked like normal Sam. Castiel only watched him read for a moment, just long enough to decide he was normal, before wandering off again. Even though he had lived in the bunker briefly, there was still a lot of the place he had never seen; after all, it was huge.

An hour later, as Castiel was wandering from room to room, he finally heard Dean waking up. He quickly made his way to him as he was in the kitchen looking for food. It was no surprise when Dean turned away from the fridge with a plate of apple pie, and a glass of milk. Castiel watched intently as Dean sat down at the table, and felt a small spark of hope at such Dean like behavior. He let himself hope that Dean was actually fine, but when Dean pushed the pie away with a sigh after only a few bites that hope died. Castiel couldn't help the sad sigh that escaped his own mouth. He was startled, though, as Dean looked right to the spot he was standing, and for a brief moment Castiel was afraid Dean could see him, but when Dean's eyes failed to focus on him the fear died as well.

Dean could have sworn he sensed a certain angel, but as he looked around the kitchen he saw no sign of him. He looked down at his pie one last time, but it made him feel sick just thinking about eating it, eating anything really, so instead he closed his eyes and leaned back in his chair. He covered his face with his hands and tried to will away all thought, but he couldn't shake the feeling of Cas being nearby, so his mind focused on that instead. A small smile crept onto his face for a moment, but it turned back into a frown as he thought about the angel's sudden departure earlier that day. Dean had gone weeks without seeing Cas, and to have him show up suddenly was nice, but it hurt when he was gone without a goodbye, like he used to do back when they had first met, before they had become friends.

Castiel watched in amazement as different emotions zoomed across Dean's face. He missed a lot of things about being human, but he didn't miss the level of pain human emotions could cause. He frowned as he watched Dean frown, wanting to do something to make it go away, but he had no idea what was even wrong so he didn't know how to fix it.

Both he and Dean jumped slightly as Sam walked into the room. Dean smiled, although Cas could tell it was fake, as he greeted his brother with a formal, for Dean, "Hey, Sam."

Castiel's frown deepened as he watched Sam walk to the fridge, never looking at his brother, only throwing a curt, "Dean", over his shoulder. Castiel saw pure pain flicker across Dean's face before it went blank. As Sam went about making himself a sandwich, Dean threw away the pie on his plate and put his dishes in the sink. He wasted no time in feeling the kitchen, and making his way out to the garage.

For a moment, Castiel stayed back. He had seen as Sam eyed Dean throwing away the pie. Castiel wanted to see the concern cross Sam's face, but when no such concern showed, he felt a stab of anger. If anyone in the world should know to be concerned about Dean throwing away pie, it should be Sam. Castiel was starting to understand what was hurting Dean so much. He had assumed that when they started hunting together again, things had gone back to normal between the two brothers, but now he could see that was far from the truth. He wasn't surprised this time to find Dean pacing and muttering in the garage.