This is one of my first stories, I dont consider myself a brony, because im not a fan. me and my sister are making stories for practice and we decided that we will make a practice story on MLP. This is my version and my sisters version will be out soon, (hers is better than mine because she spent weeks planning and plotting, i only spent a couple of days)

ENJOY!

Chapter 1: The Colt

A creamy tan colt looked down from a hill at a small town; it had some buildings clumped together with a few distinctive structures standing out from the others. The colt pushed away a strand of brown hair that was loose hanging over his face. He has over his shoulder the classic runaway pack that was tied to a stick which hes holding on to. As he looked at the village he could only hope and wish that it is there, as he made his descent.

The town was bustling, people getting ready for work and all the usual morning rituals that each and every pony plays out every day. The colt had a satchel over his beauty mark so nopony could identify him and potentially blow his cover. He began to cross the street only to notice a bouncing pink mare hopping around and greeting everypony outrageously loud. The colt tried to go undetected to the other side of the street, but when he looked back he saw the mare look right at him. He galloped behind a nearby barrel and hid. Few moments later he peeked to see if the pink mare was gone, he looked left and right to see if there were no signs of her. He let out a quiet sigh of relief and turned his head to find him staring only a few inches away from the pink mares face.

"Hi!" The girl said with an unusually high pitched voice. While the colt fell on his back with a yelp. "Oops! I didn't mean to scare you! I was just walking around saying hello to people, but then I saw you and I never saw you here before! So that just means your new because I know all the ponies in ponieville, so I just haad to meet you so I chased you and followed you behind these barrels!" The colt still wide eyed "W-wha…?" was all he was able to stammer out. "im Pinkie-Pie! What's your name?" he just laid there staring at Pinkie-Pie. "soo… Wahts your Name?" the mare asked, the colt mutered something under his breath and got up. "i-Im sorry miss, but I should really be leaving. Whatever you do, don't get in my way." The colt responded with a hint of a country accent and briskly walked away. 'hmmm' Pinkie thought. 'he must be a shy one!' she concluded, I'm going to make a welcome to ponyville party just for him!'

The colt looked behind to see that the mare was thinking, she looked constipated, but then she suddenly grew a big smile and jumped up into the air and ran off in a cloud of smoke. She's a mare he would never want to come across again!

Being more cautious, the colt continued down the street, keeping a watchful eye on anyone of importance that would want to let his identity known to the whole world. He finally came to the tree. He pulled out a piece of paper out of his saddle bag and looked it over, the map showed a tree with a X marked on it, the tree had some windows and a door, it was in the center of the map it was surrounded by buildings which show its exact location. Right here! The colt knocked on the door and listened for any sound. No answer, he knocked on the door again. This time there was a slam and some creaking footsteps. Then the door opened.

A dark purple mare came out and looked at him with purple eyes. She had mostly black straight hair with violet highlights, With some huge bangs ending at the middle of her eyes. "Hello" she said,

"hi, and who might you be?" he asked "uhh… my names Twilight Sparkles, and who are you?"

"That doesn't matter. Are you the owner of this uhhhh….Tree?"

"Why…. Yes I am"

"Good, great! I need to come inside if you don't mind."

"Actually I do mind because I only let people in that I know! As in know their name!" she narrowed her eyes at him, the colt sighed. "ok if I tell you my name you have to swear you won't tell anyone about it!" She thought about it for a bit then nodded. "My names Jack Waters."

"Jack Waters, hmm odd name" Twilight seemed to be looking up at her bangs. "well, my parents weren't that creative, now are you going to keep your side of the bargain?"

"Yes! I won't tell anyone!" she smiled

"No not that one! The one that lets me into your tree!"

"This is my house." She added. "also I never said I'll let you in." she continued, Jack gave her a cold stare. "But… if you tell me why you're here, I may consider letting you in…"

"Ugh, ok but if they come for you don't come after me for help!"

"Who are they?"

"You ask mighty lot of questions!" Jack country accent slipped out, Twilight could tell he was getting irritated. Jack walked into the tree, bumping Twilight out of the way, and he closed the door.

Jack turned around, "ok, I'm here for a special jewel," Twilight raised an eyebrow "I have sources that say that the idol is hidden in this very house!" Twilights second eyebrow went up, "Twilight, have you ever noticed anything odd about this house? Any secret passageways or mysterious cracks?"

"Other than this being a tree? I don't think soo."

"Hmm" Jack took out his map and looked at it. "Do you mind if I look around?"

"Only if I can come with you."

"Why?"

"Because I barely know you and I'm not comfortable with anyone snooping around my house by himself

"errgh! Ok, whatever you want to do you can do! But remember, I'm here for the jewel…."

"Don't worry; I have a memory of an elephant." She gave a smirk. Jack set down his traveling stuff against the wall.

"Good" jack said under his breath

He then walked upstairs and opened a door with Twilight following, Jack glanced around the inside of the room and walked over to the bed. "is this your….Bedroom?"

"Yes it is" twilight answered. "And there's a lot of personal stuff in here…." Jack picked up a stuffed animal on her bed. "…don't touch him!" Twilight yelled as she snatched the stuffed Pegasus from the colts hoof. Jack chuckled "what's his name" he said while opening Twilights closet. "His name is Newman!"

"Why Newman?"

"I don't know! Why don't you ask him?"

"He's a doll…"

"He's not just a doll! He has a family!" Jack gave a puzzled look and closed the closet.

The lights flickered on as the two ponies walked towards some towering bookcases. "You know I'm starting to second guess your reasons of being here…" twilight said. "I can assure you I'm not hiding anything" Jack replied, looking over a set and picked out a book of interest, 'The Apple Pickings'. Jack opened it and read a random page. Twilight saw a piece of paper sticking out of jack's saddle bag, she carefully took it from his bag and looked at it. Her eyes lit up and looked at Jack. Who was now looking at a book titled 'History of Appleloosa'. Twilight tapped him on the shoulder and showed him a mark on the map. He looked at the map and then looked at Twilight, "hey! You stole this from my bag!" he yelled while snatching away the map. "but wait!" she said snatching back the paper, "look at the magic symbol" she turned it around and shoved it to Jack's face. Who didn't move his face away but instead just stared at the mark making him appear cross eyed. "soo? I'm not good with magic. We're going to have to see a Magic expert an-"Twilight pulled the map out of the unicorns face and examined the mark. "It's not complicated" she closed her eyes and her horn began to glow. Jack only stared at her horn as it grew brighter until it engulfed the entire room. The walls began to shake, and then one of the bookshelf's opened up to reveal a musty dark hole in the wall. "Alright!" Jack exclaimed and looked back at Twilight who was still glowing. "Hey Twilight" he tapped her on the shoulder and she snapped out of her trance.

"wah?" Twilight gasped at the gaping hole in the wall. "That was behind my bookshelf?" She walked towards the hole. "I guess that explains why rats sometimes crawl out from under the bookshelf's. But luckily spike is around to eat them. "Jack walked up beside Twilight. "Who's Spike?"

"Oh, he's my assistant." Twilight looked around. "hmm where is Spike anyways?"

"Here I am!" a purple dragon with a greyish green belly and green spikes popped out from under some couch cushions. "Spike! Where have you been all this time!" Twilight asked a bit shocked. "I've been looking for more rats." Spike answered. "Their delicious!"

"Your disgusting!" twilight giggled. "I'm a dragon what do you expect?" Spike smiled.

There was a knock, and all three of them looked over at the door. "Hey Spike can you get that for me?" Twilight asked.

"Sure!" Spike jumped out of the cushions and opened the door. A pink mare jumped into the house, "Hi Spike! Hi Twilight! Hi…" The mare gasped when she saw the colt standing beside Twilight. "uhhh…Twilight!" she whispered gesturing Twilight to come to her. Half willingly Twilight walked over to her. "Pinkie! Kind of a bad time…"

"I was just going to inform you about a party I made, for him…" pinkie whispered while pointing over at the colt. "Pinkie don't you see a gaping hole in the wall?"

"Yeah I noticed, but the party!"

"Pinkie, once we get this over with, maybe we can go to your party."

"But the party is Much more importa-"Twilight shot Pinkie a stare. Pinkie looked at her for a few seconds "But the party is much more important!" she finished. Twilight huffed and looked at Jack.

"Jack, this is Pinkie….Pinkie-Pie. Pinkie this is Jack."

"Hmm, nice to meet you?" Jack greeted with a questioning tone. Pinkie appeared next to Jack, she grabbed his hoof and shaked it vigorously, "I'm glad to finally know you now!" she smiled and finally let go of his hand, only to bounce around wildly.

"Umm, if you girls don't mind I'm going to begin exploring this hole in the wall, the faster we find this idol the faster I can be out of your girls hair." Jack said beginning to walk towards the cave.

"ohhhh, but you can't go just yet!" Pinkie exclaimed. Jack looked at pinkie but continued towards the hole in the wall. "I have no time for parties." Jack informed.

"WHAT? Who told you about the party?"

Jack turned his head forward with a worried face, "Twilight you commen?"

Twilight trotted over towards Jack, following him into the hole. "Spike, stay out here. Make sure no one comes in after us. If were not back within two hours, then you can come and look for us." Twilight shouted, "you can count on me!" Spike exclaimed, saluting Twilight who was now barely visible in the dark hole. He looked over at Pinkie who was sitting down, with a crazy smile and an eye twitching.

How was it? Was it too long, too short, perfect? Was the writing good? Was it bad? Was it ok? How about the plot? The characters? Me portraying the characters… please review!