This is Kate and Petruchio's (Piers) wedding night. Again I have lifted some of Sally Wainwright's words. I have gone along with Shakespeare, Sally and Harry that Kate was a virgin, no matter what she implies to Petruchio.
The song that goes with this is Amy Wine house's "Teach me tonight"
Did you say I had a lot to learn?
Well, don't think I'm trying not to learn
Since this is the perfect spot to learn
Oh, teach me tonight.
Starting with the ABC of it
Right through to the XYZ of it
Help me solve the mystery of it
Teach me tonight.
The sky's a blackboard high above you
If a shooting star goes by
I'll use that star to write I love you
A thousand times across the sky.
One thing isn't very clear my love
Should the teacher stand so near, my love?
Graduation's almost near, my love
Teach me, please teach me tonight.
Because this is the story of the wedding night of this very passionate couple, it is explicit.
If you think this may be offensive to you, please don't read it.
TEACH ME TONIGHT
"Can I have one of your cigarettes?" I said. God! I haven't smoked for years, not since Uni. "Yeah, Yeah." Harry said hurriedly, surprised. And giving it to me lit it for me. I shivered uncontrollably.
"Can I?" and I took the half empty wine glass that was on the table and drained it greedily. There were a few bits of bread on a plate and I pinched them together and crammed them into my mouth.
"Saturday, it was all an accident, you know." Harry said "There was a jam, that's why we were late."
"And the drink? He was drunk."
"Yeah, well, he was scared."
"What of?"
"I don't know...whatever it is that anyone is scared of on their wedding day."
"And his clothes?" Harry shrugged, "He's always been like it, done that. When he's unsure ... apprehensive."
"But why then? Why not before? Why not talk to me about it? Before?"
"I don't know. Perhaps he thought that if he wore the suit, you might think he was one of the grownups, and he's not, you know, not grownup and never will be, never be more than about six," he grimaced, " He just wants someone to love him: for what he is."
"I rather gathered that." I said rather caustically.
"And he loves you, you know. He does love you in his own way."
I wouldn't meet his eyes.
"And what about you?" Harry asked. "Why did you marry him? Because the Party told you, because it would look good? Or do you love him?"
I felt the tears prickle behind my eyes. I wasn't going to tell this creep, Bianca's ex. anything and started to shake my head, but found the tears had welled up and I was giving a half nod.
"Well then."
"What about my career?" I burst out. "Everything I've ever wanted, worked for?"
"I shouldn't think that matters, an eccentric aristocrat ...not in your party! Anyway, is it more important, your career?"
I hated his smug, awful... very kindly face.
"Well, yes."
That startled him."Is it? Is it really? "
I stared at him through a prism of tears and as they brimmed over and fell, I shook my head.
We both heard the crunch of gravel as he returned.
"Here it is, Kate. Your bag, Harry's brought it all the way from Pisa. "
I wouldn't, couldn't turn to look at him, not with tears running down my face. He walked straight past us to the edge of the pool and stood there.
"He's going to throw it in, isn't he? Going to taunt me with a week's worth of clean knickers and then throw it in the pool."
"Looks like it." Harry said resignedly.
"I'm going to throw it in the pool unless you're nice to me. I am going to count to ten and it's going in."
And he began to count. "TEN...nine..." I stared at the dirty dishes on the table willing myself not to cry anymore. I took a puff of my cigarette, " six...five ... not unless you are nice to me, Kate ...three ...two...one ...and a half ..." I took another puff.
"One."
A pause and then came the splash of my suitcase landing in the pool. I took a deep breath, gave the cigarette to Harry and went to my husband.
I had no idea what I was going to do when I start to walk to the pool, but when I got to him, we looked at each other, then I looked at the stream of bubbles rising in the pool.
"I don't wear knickers; not when I'm on holiday anyway." I lied but he wouldn't know.
Then I reached up and pulled his head down to me and I kissed him. He had kissed me before, lots of times, not as much as he would have liked nor how he would have liked but I had been keeping a tight rein on things. Till last night. That was a bit of a revelation, to me anyway.
And so I kissed him, rubbing my lips against his, holding him tightly, till his lips parted. I let him go.
"I'm going to bed now." I said and turning walked away towards the house, past Harry. I didn't speak, couldn't speak, and didn't know what HE would do. Then I heard his footsteps on the gravel coming after me. My knees were shaking but my heart was thumping. Through the house; I was on the stairs before he caught up. I felt his hand take mine and we went on up hand in hand, till we reached our room. He opened the door for me, slipped through after me and closed it. I was shivering and shaking.
I am an M.P. I can face up to Ministers of the Crown, TV pundits, the Media. I have the most fearful of tempers, most cutting of tongues. I am a 38 year old virgin with next to no experience of men. No boyfriends to speak of, no-one that lasted more than a few dates and none at all since Uni. I don't suffer fools gladly; I am cleverer than most and most men are frightened of me.
Then I was trapped in a lift with this big noisy forceful overpowering incredibly handsome man with his thick black hair, the most amazingly beautiful green eyes and I fell. I fell for his looks, for his charm, for his way with words, his lovely voice and if I'm honest, his ancient title.
!6th Earl of Charlbury.
How he made me feel, what he made me want, I don't know. Yes I do, I wanted him, wanted him to kiss me to hold me, to touch me. He quoted Shakespeare to me and sang to me, beautiful old songs. He told me he loved me over and over again until I, the most cynical of women, believed him.
Now, I was shivering and shaking, wondering what to do next.
This is it girl.
Straighten your backbone, put on a face as you did as teenager when everyone admired your beautiful, charming sister and ignored you.
I walked into the room towards the bed, kicking off my shoes, then unbuttoning the over coat of my wedding dress, dropping it where I stood.
Shit, I forgot I couldn't reach the zip of the dress, it was at the side and Mummy had had to do it up.
"Um. Do you think, could you undo it?"
"Yes, sure "and he came to me "Um. Er, how do I ?"
"There's a zip, then 3 hooks." And I lifted my arm a little for him to unzip my wedding dress. As I felt it loosen, I pushed it down and stepped out of the frothy heap of satin and tulle. He hadn't moved away and I realised he had taken off his coat and tee-shirt.
"I would not have put you down as a stocking girl, Kate." he said, his voice husky.
"I'm too small for tights." I was undoing the suspender when he said "How the hell did you do that?" He looked staggered.
"Do you mean this" and flipped the other one.
"It must be a woman thing "I said flippantly, "like multitasking."
I was beginning to feel more sure of myself now, verbally anyway. He dropped to one knee and our fingers touched. I let him roll down first one and then the other stocking, putting my hand on his shoulder to steady myself as I lifted each foot. It was warm and firm, like his hand brushing my thigh. He stood, undid his belt and pants and I was pulling the suspender straps out of my knickers when I saw him.
I had never seen a naked man. I'd seen pictures and statues of course, but not seen a fully aroused man even if it was still inside his shorts.
It was huge and straining the fabric beyond anything I could possibly have imagined. We'd had a bit of a tussle, well fight, last night when he had threatened to... exert his conjugal rights, and I thought...well. It was pretty big then but now!
I caught my breath.
"What? What is it?" Then he realised I was staring at his erection."My cock?"
"It's big "I whispered.
"I'm a big bloke, Kate." he said. I was struggling with my suspender belt trying to undo it.
"But I'm not." I said in a rush "Will it I don't think do you think it will go in?" He put his arms around me, unhooked my belt, dropped it, and then moved up to take off my bra.
"I mean to try Kate. Oh! I mean to try." he whispered.
My head was swimming. His touch was burning me. He was talking; I don't know what about; about my breasts.
I mean, I am small, 5ft and half an inch and I am not particularly well covered. I do not have big boobs but he seemed to be enchanted by them.
"You have the most delicious breasts."
"Are you implying that my breasts are small?" God, why do I have be so prickly!
"Now how did you work that one out?" Laughter in his voice.
"Magnificent is big." I said. "Anything else is small"
"I think your breasts are in perfect proportion to the rest of you."
"Small" I said.
He slid his hands down my arms, lifting them, put them around his neck and wrapping his around my bottom, lifted me.
"Do you know, your bottom is like a perfect peach." and jumped onto the bed. We bounced on this big downy bed and suddenly a giggle burst out of me. He looked down at me with his laughing green eyes.
"Kate, I love it when you laugh. Kate" and kissed me all along my jaw to my ear, whispering the name that I always refused to be called. Which he insisted on calling me, kissing me over and over again till I didn't care what he called me as long as he didn't stop kissing me with these intoxicating dizzying lightest of kisses.
I rested my hands on his shoulders; he was big, his shoulders and back so broad, I touched the back of his neck. He kissed the hollow of my throat his tongue moving in it. Then he cupped my breast, rubbed my nipple the gentlest of touches, a little shot of electricity went through me to the tip and then from my breast down to my groin, making me catch my breath.
He played with my nipples with both his hands rolling them between his fingers all the while his eyes watching me, looking at what he was doing, looking at me and I was beginning to lose my breath.
He moved slightly to my side, stroked my ribs, my waist, my belly, his finger circled my navel, sliding down over my hip and all the time he was kissing me. His hand rested on the lace of my knickers, slid his fingers under the edge. He hesitated then he pushed them down; I raised my hips to let him take them down until he couldn't reach further and so, I twisted to take them off as he took his off too.
Oh God I could feel the enormity of him, feel the heat between us.
He lay on me, squeezing my breasts pressing his hips into me and the he began kissing me wide open mouth wet kisses, his tongue exploring, his lips on mine. He moved to his side kissing my throat, caressing my belly, twisting my hairs around his fingers.
"Touch me, Kate" he whispered and as I stroked his shoulder I felt him smile.
"No, like this,"
He took my hand and put it on him and for the first time I felt him the length, the hardness, the incredible soft velvet smoothness of him and wondered at it. His hand showed mine what to do, what he liked. I heard him draw sharp breaths when I touched certain places, and all the time I was full of amazement and something else.
Panic.
Then his hand left mine and he murmured "Open your thighs Kate." and for the first time he slid his fingers into me.
"God, Kate you're wet."
Confused and embarrassed by this, I didn't know if this was it good or bad?
Then I felt him spread my juice around me inside then out until every part of me was wet and I knew. It was good, so good. He was sliding his fingers gently just inside me. Oh God! God. Up and around me spreading me open, exploring. We were both gasping and breathless, then on an upward stroke he found my clitoris. I knew it existed but had no idea what it felt like to be touched there, I had never explored myself.
I caught my breath.
"There?" he whispered. Wordlessly I nodded and he began stroking me, kissing my open mouth, touching with tiny firm movements and all the time murmuring wordless sounds.
Then, "Kate, I must come in you, I must, I'm so near, please Kate, Kate," I was astonished at how he was, the tension of his body was like a coiled spring, feeling his tiny whispering breaths on my face ,my throat. I was nodding without being aware I was, then he was kneeling between my thighs, opening me with his finger. Suddenly the panic changed, I was not panicking, I was very still, I was afraid, sharp gasping breaths afraid, when he put that hard silken length against me, moved and his weight pushed him into me. Oh God, his knob was huge and it was in me. He moved again and went further into me, I felt him tear me. I put one hand against his chest to push him away, the other to my mouth. I bit it hard to stop me crying out loud with the pain; and then he was pushing up, up until I felt his hairs against mine. Oh God, this huge thing in me, this enormous rod filling me. Then he began to pump me, harder and harder, lifting my hips to him. Thrusting and thrusting, I could hear little whimpering moans, was that me? And over them, my name "Kate, Kate, Kate". Then one huge surge, then small spurts deep in me.
He lay on me, dragging deep breaths into his lungs as I lay and wondered.
Was that It? What everyone went on about? What people had died for? His head, his hair was against my face, he was sliding out of me, I bit my lip at the soreness of it, then as I did, I wanted to touch his hair and I smiled as a strange feeling came over me, love, tenderness, exultant joy, Wanting to shout with what? Superiority? Yes! Superiority, as if I was at the top of a mountain and he was just below. As if I knew all the wisdom of the ages, that every woman before me had known, and I rested my head against his and smiled.
"You O.K?" he whispered.
"Mmm."
He kissed my breast so softly so gently, as we lay together and he said "I must be heavy on you."
"No" but he slid off me, gathered me into his arms and held me.
" Kate Kate sorry. Sorry ... It was too fast." The words were hurried and garbled. "I didn't mean it shouldn't be... so fast. I haven't had ... done it for a long time. I wanted you ... so much."
"Sshh"
"It's like an express train... couldn't stop."
" Sshh. It doesn't matter."
"Kate, Kate, it does, it does. You were wonderful, it was wonderful. How, how was... was it alright for you?"
"Um ...yes ...it was nice"
I felt him stiffen.
"Nice?" his voice was soft, cool. "Nice?"
Somehow I had said it wrong.
"Lovely."
"Nice, lovely. That's not for us, not for you and me." His voice was taut, fraught. "Not for you and me. It should be shooting stars and fireworks, crashing waves, Carmine Burana and the Hallelujah Chorus. You will have them, we will have them. I promise you, I promise Kate." I kissed his mouth softly, touched his face and smiled at him.
We must have slept. I drifted up to bells and the chimes of a clock. I counted 12 with it.
I felt him move the slightest movement that told me he was awake.
"It's midnight." I said. "I counted the chimes. We've been married three days."
I felt his mouth against my hair.
"And they said it wouldn't last."
A little gurgle of laughter was in my throat.
I had laughed, and cried, more in the few weeks I had known him than in rest of my adult life.
I lay in his arms; we just held each other, saying nothing. He tucked back that bit of hair that would fall over my face and he stroked my eyebrows, my cheek, ear till his mouth found mine in the softest gentlest kiss. Then my throat, the hollow at the base my neck, his hands drifting slowly over me exploring every inch of me so softly I hardly knew he was touching me and I was touching him, his chest, winding the hairs there around my finger, across his shoulder, so wide, he was so big. Close to me, he was so big, I felt I could sink into him, fold him around me.
I moved my thigh, slid it up and across his, and felt a tremor run through him. I wrapped my arms around him and pressed my mouth against his chest, felt his on my hair, everything so soft and sweet that I wanted it to last forever. He nuzzled my jaw and my ear and I felt the smallest of movements against my belly, then a second one and I knew what it was, I could feel his smile against my hair and smiled too, the smallest of smiles but he could feel it.
"I thought you had to have a night's sleep before you could do that again."
"Fallacy " he said and slowly softly caressed my arms, my shoulders."All you need is some rest and a little, um, manipulation. Fancy some Kate?"
"On whose part?" I asked.
"Oh I think both of us" he said, I could hear the laughter in his voice. His hand moved to my breast and caressed it, played with my nipple, I gasped and he asked if he had hurt me. "A little sore" I said but it wasn't just that, it was the jolt that shot down to my groin that made me want him. I moved and he was lying on me, both hands on my breasts stroking both nipples.
"They are so beautiful. Like raspberries on mounds of cream."
His mouth on mine was soft yet demanding and I could feel him growing between us. He rolled taking me with him, his hands were touching, stroking all over me. He rolled me onto my stomach beginning again to touch, stroke, explore every inch of me, my ribs, my spine, running his fingers down the crease of my bottom.
"It's so soft, just like a perfect peach."
We rolled again our thighs parting, sliding between, everything so slow and gentle.
It was heavenly.
His hand found what he wanted. Deep in me, his fingers wet with my juice, slowly sliding out, lubricating me, searching for the nub that he knew would arouse me. There, he could feel it and he began caressing it slowly softly, again and again till it was so swollen under his fingers standing proud of the softness. My eyes were closed, my mouth slightly open, my breathing imperceptible, I was limp against his thighs. He put his arms around me.
"Touch me." he murmured softly and I did, feeling the wonder that was him, hot and hard between my fingers. Then his were in me rubbing, I gave a little moan for the soreness, for the thrill, the excitement.
He could barely hear what I was saying, "Don't stop...don't ...stop.
"I'm not going to" He went back to my clit moving in circles around its base pressing back the softness
" It's big." I said into his chest.
"You didn't have to worry though, did you? I mean, about it going in. It went in Kate. All of it, all the way and I'm going to do it again."
His voice thickened and he kissed me all along my throat to my ear saying my name over and over between each kiss and his fingers moved; his mouth took a nipple and his other hand had the other, I held my breath moving and twisting with him, then his hands were all over me, then back again. I feel his breath getting faster and he was murmuring, wordless sounds that were so thrilling to me. He turned me onto my back, knelt between my thighs and took me. A little soreness but then that was lost in the demands he made, the beat, his voice thick with desire saying things.
"You're so wet, so soft." He slid his arms under my hips to raise me.
"Oh God you're so tight, so tight. Oh Kate, my Kate." He began to thrust , firm, slow, deep, harder till I began to lose grip of myself and someone was whispering "Oh! Oh, Oh, Oh please." It had to be me for he was groaning with the strength of his need and I moaned and moved with him until it was almost unbearable. He was moving in the softest excruciatingly exquisite way and it was lovely. No matter what he said it was lovely. Oh, it was lovely.
I had never slept with anyone so waking with someone, curled like spoons, was a new experience. I gave a little stretch so as not to wake him but he was already awake, his arms around me, his hands holding mine, and I was aware of his erection against my back, very aware. He is my only experience of a man but it seems to me that he is pretty damn big, it is pretty damn big and this feeling, the desire began to well up from between my thighs.
"You awake?"
"Mmmm" I said.
"Turn around Kate" and suddenly I wanted to tease, to push, to provoke, to play games.
"Why?"
"Oh, I think you know why."
He moved pushing gently against me
"Do I?"
"Oh yes"
"What if I say no?"
"What if I make you?"
Yeah! He wanted to play the game too.
"Do you think you could?"
"Oh let me see. You're 5ft tall, 7 and half stones soaking wet, and I'm 6 ft tall, 12 and half stone, yeah! I think I could make you."
"I'd like to see you try." Before the words were out of my mouth, he had flipped me over and had my hands held above my head, demanding what I was going to do next.
Let's push this game a bit further, I thought.
"Oh, I'll have to lie back and think of England."
His reaction was not what I expected.
"No you bloody won't!" he said roughly. "Not in my bed. The only thing you'll think of in my bed is what I'm doing to you between your legs. And now, I'm going to fuck you"
Somebody had told me once you should pick your battles. Only fight the ones you can win, but I must have thought maybe I could still win this one.
So I said impudently, "I thought you had."
"No, I've screwed you, and I've shagged you."
"Oh, there's a difference?"
"Oh, yes" and he carefully and explicitly explained.
"And it's hot and hard, and dirty ...very dirty. Now my lady, what do you have to say?"
You've got to have the last word Katherine, haven't you? I thought. My cheek against his cheek, my mouth against his ear I said "Fuck me."
With that he suited his actions to my words, with his fingers, his hands, his mouth and I began to fall down that long slippery slope to the magical world he had introduced me to. Of joy, ecstasy, hard and soft, fast and slow, of giving as well as taking, touching and being touched, of mouths meeting, of moving and stillness, of whispers and moans, words "don't stop" "never" groans ," I want" "Tell me" and "please... Please." Of the world where there was only him and me and he was in me giving me what I wanted, what he wanted. He put both his arms under my hips to lift me high to his thrusts, deeper, harder, I lifted myself to him and he bore me back down with his thrust and I lifted to him again and again, I was throbbing swollen wanting,... only wanting him deeper in me knowing nothing but him. I felt as though giant waves picked us up and threw us down over and over. As though I was falling, falling...
Am I dying?
Yes, this is what you could die for.
We lay sweat running down us, the bed damp beneath us. I was his woman and he was my man, the only ones in the world. There was no superiority now, only the joy for the ecstasy he had given to me, had given us.
I opened my eyes and the dark blue of night had begun to lighten. His head was on my breast, calm now, he pressed his mouth against me, then holding me, rolled over me onto his side and curled me into him. I didn't care about anything else, only that he was what I wanted for the rest of my life.
My love. My dearest love.
My dearest love.
My dearest love, and being me I had to provoke.
"Where's my mobile?"
Without moving or even opening his eyes, he said,
"In the oven, with the foot pump."
Couldn't leave it there, could I? I proceeded to tell him what he was going to have to do.
"You've got a lot do this morning, haven't you?"
"Anything else you like me to do I'm at it?"
"Yes, I'd like an apology for all you've subjected me to over the last few days."
"Apology? Me? I'm the one that needs the apology. Any way it's still night, 'How bright doth shine the moon'. "
"It's the sun, pillock."
He told me he would not have me speak like that to him."Respect! Kate. I'm going to have respect. Respect between us." Then he told me what he thought a woman's place was and he was going to put me there.
Discretion is the better part of valour, keep your big guns for the last, she who fights last, fights longest, and all that; so I held back, letting him think I agreed. I closed my eyes, letting him go on.
"And no more talk of divorce. Kate, no divorce... Kate? KATE. "
"No. No divorce." I murmured. I was waiting, like a cat waiting for a mouse. So he thought he would be complimentary about our wedding night and virgins in particular.
"Last night," and he gave a little laugh. I opened my eyes.
"It was pretty spectacular. I mean, for a virgin. "He slowed to a halt as I narrowed my eyes at him.
I coolly raised my eyebrows.
"Well," doubt creeping in." You are ... were a virgin. Weren't you?"He looked at me."I was lead to believe ... I mean Harry said, I mean Bianca told Harry..." He trailed off as I fixed him with my basilisk stare.
So now I've got you, I thought. Now, I'm going to squeeze you, and told him in no uncertain terms what I thought about gentlemen who discussed ladies' virginity and husbands who inquire about their wives' personal history.
He beat a hasty retreat." I'll make us some breakfast, shall I? I'll um just have a quick shower, then make it... "
I twisted into the bed covers smirking to myself.
That round to me I think!
Could I leave it there? Of course not.
He came out of the bathroom, and having found one shoe, was looking the other.
"I can't find my sodding shoe."
I rolled over.
"I think you'll find it over here under my dress."
He rummaged about, found it and sat on the bed to put them on.
"About last night," I said.
"Mmm." he said, struggling with his shoe.
"It wasn't spectacular." quoting his word back at him. He stared at me curled up in the tangle of sheets and covers that we had created.
"No?"His face became blank, a cool blank and his eyes were watchful.
"No!"
And I let him have it!
"No, it wasn't! Not spectacular at all!" I was watching that still face.
"No, it was all shooting stars, fireworks and crashing waves, Carmine Burana, the Hallelujah Chorus, with the 1812 overture thrown in."
He lunged at me, grabbed me and kissed me.
I smiled at him and he said "Shall I get back in?"
"If you do, I will never have any breakfast."
He smiled at me and my heart jumped.
"I love you, Lady Charlbury.
Then I said it easily, effortlessly, for the first time.
"And I love you, Lord Charlbury"
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