2005, a stargate: sg-1 fanfic

2005

A fanfic based on Stargate: SG-1

By RogueDragon and Nebulan (common Screennames)

NOTE: Authors' Note: I, RogueDragon, had this idea in my head for quite some time, but I figured it would have been done by now but my search to find a fanfic with this general idea failed. I scribbled my thoughts down and Nebulan read what I had, added some, and now hers and my work got pretty well mixed together. All the Tok'ra were created for the story except Jalen who appeared in "Exodus" and "Fail Safe."

Please, give it a chance, read it, and let us know what you thought! Written winter of 2004-2005

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How long should I wait?

How long am I going to pace laps around this Stargate until I ought to try dialing it and seeing if...

Would I know if they succeeded? What if they hadn't? What if... I sigh to myself. There would never be any going back to the Earth I knew: if they succeeded or not. I check my watch again. Fifteen minutes. They should have opened the gate by now.

I soon as I had stepped through the gate to Chulak, I had signaled to Teal'c to go on through. I wanted to go back with him right then, but they wanted me to explain why they did this... if they failed.

They can't fail. Too much is at stake, or was at stake.

Just in case they would try and track me down, which I knew they wouldn't do right away, I had automatically dialed a different Planet after Teal'c's wormhole disengaged. So here I am, waiting in the beautiful building in the Land of Light where Tuplo's people had moved the Stargate.

Ugh! I can't stand it any longer. If I can establish a wormhole to Earth, something would definitely have gone wrong. Who cares about the truth? If I can help, I'm going back!

Wow, I didn't even realize that I had already begun dialing up Earth as I made up my mind. Well... It's a bit scary. I hate a fear of the unknown. There have been way too many unknowns in this whole ordeal.

My hand is shaking, but I finally push the DHD's center jewel and it glows up. I look up to the Stargate. Did it just flicker as it established? Or is my mind playing tricks with me?

I'm sick of thinking. With a quick deep breath I run towards the gate and throw myself into it.

I feel the normal bizarre feeling that comes with gatetravel, but I feel like I'm also being put through the agitate cycle of a top-loading washing-machine. Next thing I know I'm being thrown out of the event horizon, freezing cold.

I see my friends.

They're all dead.

Then it disappears, my whole surroundings fade to... an airport? My heart rate increases. Well, Janet, we're not in Kansas anymore.

Busy crazy airport. I forgot what these were like. Being in an unfamiliar place, not even knowing why, I head towards the exits without even thinking about it. This place brings back so many memories, but it doesn't fit. If only Sam was here, she'd be able to figure it out.

Taxi. I should try and get to one. Money. Do I have any money with me? It's not like Teal'c's or Tuplo's people would have done much with it. I find I do still have my wallet and some cash. My hands are shaking.

Will they take my cash? This isn't the Earth I left less than a half-hour ago, so what should I expect?

I find I am standing next to a taxi with a bored driver who's wondering what I'm trying to decide.

"Colorado Springs," I say.

He stares at me and responds politely, "I can take you to a bus station that can send you in the right direction."

I smile nervously, "that'd be alright."

I barely breathe this whole trip. I don't know what's happening, plus I just realize that I'm in a bit of shock. One awful trip later, I arrive at the familiar surroundings I lived in for several years... several years ago.

I wasn't too hard to get to Cheyenne Mountain.

As I feared, it was a different Cheyenne Mountain than the one back home...

I didn't have an ID or anything. That could be a problem. I approach a guard, "Hi, I was wondering if I could speak to someone inside."

The security guard looks at me with a cocked eyebrow, trying to tell how serious I am, "and who would you like to contact?"

Would the people I knew be there? How about I just try... Dr.? Major? Colonel? "Samantha Carter, please," I respond boldly only after a moments contemplation. "Last I checked she had an office on level nineteen."

The guard studies me some more, and then grabs a list from his desk. He picks up the phone in his limited space, dials something, and hands me the phone.

"Carter."

"Sam?"

"...yes?" she sounds unsure, but it wasn't a normal call anyway.

"Hi, I'm here at the Mountain's entrance and I need your help." Please understand... Please understand...

"Who is this?" she demands sharply, startling me.

I swallow, "Dr. Janet Frasier."

There's silence at the other end and then the phone is hung up. I don't have to wait long for a contingent of soldiers to come and take me down to a holding room at the SGC.

Welcoming bunch.

Fear creeps up my spine, but I still have some lingering Air Force training and I hold myself together. Why do I feel so at home when I know I'm so far from it? And I know that I am most likely stuck as well.

I sit in the holding room for a few minutes until a doctor I do not recognize comes in and gives me the basic examination for strange people... including a blood sample and Goa'uld check.

Over the following ten minutes, I rediscover some nervous habits that I had thought I left behind in grade school.

Finally, my official welcoming committee has arrived. It's Sam, looking very nostalgic in her generic green pants and black shirt. Behind her is another familiar face, as crabby-looking as ever, but do I notice... he's got stars on his uniform... that's very different.

They stare at me, mouths hanging slightly unhinged. I break the ice. "Look, obviously things are very strange for you at the moment, but believe me, it's nothing like the spinning world I'm getting overwhelmed with."

Sam and... General Jack exchanges glances. Sam paces slightly, faces me, crosses her arms in front of her chest, and prepares herself to begin her interrogation, but not sure where to begin. "First off, do you know where you are?" She trying to figure out just how foreign I am.

"Yes," I reply simply, "this is Stargate Command, a location at which I was stationed for four or so years." I state as-a-matter-of-fact-ly. "I am Doctor Janet Frasier, but I think you might already me."

Sam nods more to herself than to me, "how did you get here?"

My shoulders sloop. I think about the events of the last week. So much has changed. Everything I knew... everyone I knew... are probably gone... or ceased to exist or something. My mind flashes to an image that I had in my head just as I got thrown into the Airport. My friends all died, with no one to know of their heroism. Did I see my reality just for a moment before I fully entered this one? Tears start to sting my eyes and I think Sam noticed my abrupt change in mood and seemed ready to change subject, but I answer her.

"To be honest, Sam," I look up to meet her eyes, "I was hoping you could help me figure that out."

"Ahh, there," O'Neill says as Sam and I sit down, "That's more comfortable." There are guards posted around the briefing room.

"Oh, I'd prefer the infirmary," I say nervously. "I miss being an old fashion doctor." O'Neill raises an eyebrow. Sam looks at me like she's trying to solve a puzzle, oh, I sure hope she can figure this one out.

"Ok," O'Neill starts as nicely as is possible for him, "Let's start at the beginning, who are you?"

Uhg! He doesn't believe me? How can I make them understand! "I'm Janet Nicole Fraiser, I was born in Kansas City, Missouri, I received my doctorate at University of California Medicine. I joined the Airforce in 1989, I joined the SGC in 1996 where not too long later I found myself trying to discover the cure for a disease that made Sam seduce you in the locker room..."

"Ah!" O'Neill interrupts me. Sam is blushing but smiling. "Look, we know who you look like, but we know you're NOT Janet Fraiser." He sounds angry and unconvinced.

I don't understand? Wherever I am, they have their own Janet?

O'Neill continues, "now, our medical staff did check for one of those funky devices that those funky aliens used when they strung us all up in that one room with gooy webs." O'Neill was making hand motions as he talked to suggest his discomfort, "but we didn't find anything...so we're just waiting for those blood test results to prove..."

"Not necessarily sir. She may still be genetically the same person as Janet, but we may be dealing with an alternate Janet."

Hello! I'm still here! So I interrupt, "but I didn't go through any 'Quantum Mirrors' or anything. Wouldn't you like me to tell you how I got here?"

O'Neill blinks, "From where?"

"Well see, I was at the Land of Light, and I dialed Earth, and when I got here, I remember seeing the Earth I remember, but you..." No, I don't want to see them dead anymore, they're ok, they're right here. "...Well, and then all of a sudden I was in a different Earth? An airport in DC to be more exact."

The general looks at the colonel, "Sir, I don't think it's possible for inter-dimensional travel with the Stargate but I'd have to research it..."

"...Hey Jack!" A new voice is heard entering the room, "remember those tablets we found an P2C-749? Well, I think it a derivative of Goa'uld but with actually a Spanish flav-... uh, what's with all the guards?"

I turn around quickly, my heart leaping, "Daniel!"

His jaw drops, and so do his papers, his face goes pale. "Janet?" He finally whispers. I don't understand, what is so different about me? I don't think I want to know. I'm so tired, I hardly got any sleep on that bus. I rub my eyes and aching head.

Sam breaks the silence. "Daniel, please meet, who we think is probably an alternate-Janet."

"Or an imposter," General O'Neill mumbles.

Daniel is still staring, "Alternate? As in Jack-and-Sam-are-married-where-you-come-from alternate?"

My hands are still rubbing my head, "No, she married a civilian."

"Pete?" Sam smiles.

"No, Joe. Joe Faxon."

Sam's eyes widen at this. "The ambassador? He died nearly three years ago."

I cock an eyebrow, but then sigh deeply. Sam says, "You must be tired..."

O'Neill interrupts her, "Daniel, will you and the guards escort 'Ms. Fraiser' to some guest quarters? Carter, a word?"

I get up nervously. As I leave the room, I hear Sam say something about "benefit of the doubt." I think that it's going in my favor.

Wow, everything looks the same!

Daniel is still walking with me to my quarters, but he hasn't said anything. But still, it does feel nice to be home. When we get to the door, he says good night. I can't leave it like that, so I add, "Daniel...I-"

"I know." He said softly and left before anything more awkward could be said.

I cried myself to sleep.

I was there again, in the Stargate departure area, I'm looking up at Daniel as I wave him good bye, goodbye for good. Then to Teal'c , I put my hand on his shoulder as he leaves Chulak, and then I'm alone, afraid. I'm back in DC again, and there are my friends dead on the floor, I rush to their sides, I try to save them. My hands shake, I'm useless. There's a knocking, the door opens, in enters Borren, I yell at him, and then he says, "Janet?" in Sam's voice. I sit up quickly.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," Carter says gently as she sits on the side of my bed. I'm sweating and shaking.

Sam continues, "You've been asleep for nearly twelve hours."

"I haven't slept well the last few days." I say groggily. The last couple days I could hardly sleep on the bus, and then before than I could barely sleep after I gave my Sam that examination...

Sam asks me gently, "I was just wondering if there was anything unusual when you went through that gate from the Land of Light."

I didn't want to talk about it. Sam could tell from my expression. There was a knock at the door.

"Teal'c!" Sam looks pleased to see me smile.

He bowed his head (which had hair on it! It looked very good!), "I thought perhaps you would enjoy breakfast?" He came bearing gifts on a tray. I note that he still had the golden first-prime symbol of Apophis on his forehead. Then again, where I came from, Teal'c had gotten rid of it a couple of years after the SGC shut down and turned into a museum.

Teal'c sits next to Sam as I start sipping my orange juice. My eyes widen as I taste the drink. "Wow!" Sam and Teal'c look at me confused, "It's been a long time since I've had real orange juice."

"Your enjoyment of the food reminds me of Jonas Quinn." Teal'c smiles.

"Who?"

Sam smiles, "An alien who took Daniel's place when he died."

My eyes shoot open in shock, "he died?"

Sam laughs, "He got better, we'll explain it all later." There is a pause as I slowly eat. Sam starts again slowly, yet very curious. "Janet?"

"I don't have any of the answers you want, Sam. I have no idea what has happened." Of course, there is more I'm not telling her.

"Well, if there's anything you can tell me that was unusual..." Sam trails off.

I ask, "is it possible that a solar flare can cause me to switch realities?"

Sam is startled by this, "No, I don't think so, as far as we know, it can only cause time travel."

I say softly and solemnly, "I doubt it matters how I got here, I'm stuck here."

Sam says, "But you can't stay permanently in another dimension..."

"I know," I say, "I remember. But I didn't go through a quantum mirror..." I stop. I don't really want to continue. This toast looks good.

Sam sighs but asks, "Do you have any idea why the Stargate took you to DC instead of Colorado?"

"Because in my reality, the Stargate is in DC. They moved it there when the Stargate was opened to the public."

Sam's eyes lit up at the idea, the possibilities. "I wonder if the general will allow me to go to DC and see if I can find any evidence..."

"I doubt it." I interrupt. "I doubt he'd let you go. No offense, I'm sure O'Neill makes a great general, I just..." I hang my head, "miss George."

"George?" Sam questions, "George Hammond?"

"We can contact him in DC if you would like," Teal'c offers.

"He's alive?" I smile. Sam and Teal'c raise eyebrows. My face falls, "and Cassie?"

"She's doing great!" Sam smiles

"Really!" I look at Sam shocked.

"She got into Cornel, and she's majoring in Bio-Physics."

Tears came to my eyes. Sam guesses and pats me on the back.

Suddenly the alarm rings. Sam and Teal'c run out of the room to see what's going on. I am left alone. "What's going on?" I ask the guards at the door.

One of them pulls up a radio and asks that same question. "SG-11 encountered some of Ba'al's Jaffa, wounded coming in."

"Who's Bahl?" I ask, expecting no answer. Probably staff blasts... Wait! I had four years of experience with staff weapon damage, "I can help!" I call after them. I wait anxiously, there but no one let me help. Teal'c later tells me that the injuries weren't too back and I probably would have just made the medical staff uncomfortable. Once again, I'm useless.

I enter Daniel's lab, comfy and messy. I never hung around in here much, but I always felt a warm excitement when I did go in.

"Hey," I greet. My heart is pumping, but it feels nice to be around him again.

"Hey, oh yeah, thanks for coming," he responds and gives his head a nervous scratch. He glances at my escort, "you don't have to stick around, I'll keep an eye on her." The SF nods and moves out of sight. Daniel clears his throat and puts his nervousness aside. He motions to a seat while he ruffles through papers, "I wanted to try and get a better idea of what our two universes have in common and what not." I sit and he figures out what papers he wants at this point. He rolls his wheeled chair over to his computer and brings up some files.

He looks at his paper and pushes his glasses up his nose. "Alright, from what you know, how was your Stargate program started... in a nutshell?"

I take a breath and begin to give him what I could remember. After all there were details I needed to know, so I tell him about the Langfords and try to remember specific dates. Daniel continues on asking questions. So far everything seems the same.

"You stayed on Abydos because you found a place among them, something you once told me you definitely didn't feel you had on this planet. You became a teacher and a husband, while continuing to uncover the history of Abydos."

Daniel has stopped marking his paper and is just watching me, with a look of fond memories in his eyes and a pleasant grin on his face. "I remember our Janet talking with me on more than one occasion, helping me out."

I hope I'm not blushing. "Yeah, I remember times when you were down, and we found ourselves talking about Sha're." I say, we smile at the memory. My face grows worried, "I do hope I was able to help you find your place?"

Daniel's expression becomes distant and says under his breath, "I found my place..." he breaths deeply, "But I feel like there's still something..."

"Missing?"

He half shrugs in agreement.

We continue on a little bit and talk about SG1's motivations. We talked about Sha're and Skaara as Daniel and Colonel O'Neill's motivations and I explain that "Teal'c just wanted to kick some goa'uld butt in a very, very, very stoic way!"

Daniel and I laugh, "yeah, it took him a few years to shift out of emotionless first prime to the smiley-jaffa-freedom-fighter he is today," Daniel grins.

I smile too, "well, Sam was in SG-1 for the sole purpose of boldly-going where no Earth-Woman-Scientist-Soldier had gone before." Daniel smiles as he jots some more notes, remembering the same in his own Sam.

A half-hour later, we had covered almost a year of our SGCs' histories and have found no noticeable differences so far. "Our worlds seem so similar, it's amazing how different they are," he remarks and then glances at one of the missions on his list. He cocks his eyebrow and glances up at me curiously, "did you guys ever encounter a Quantum Mirror?"

I nod, "yeah, it was near the end of the first year, you found yourself on an Earth where Teal'c was leading an invasion of the SGC."

Daniel stares at his paper and me in confused deep thought, "and Sam and Jack were engaged?" he inquires. Something's bothering him. When I answer in the affirmative, he reaches for a phone and dials, "Sam? You busy?"

When Sam arrives, Daniel brings up a confusing thought, "from what Janet tells me," Daniel explains, "her realities' Daniel went to a universe just like the one I went to with engaged General Jack and Dr. Carter and all. But the one I went to, well... I went to and not some other Daniel Jackson."

"Well, theoretically, there can be universes almost exactly like ours, including travel to a universe almost exactly like that one," Sam offers knowingly and hypothetically.

"Still," I conclude the as-of-yet unspoken thought, "that's quite a coincidence." We all exchange glances.

Sam stays with us throughout the rest of the interview, but however we look at our universes, up to whatever point we had been talking about, our worlds seemed to be exactly the same.

We have just finished talking about the time when General Hammond was black mailed. "The harcesis son of Apophis and Sha're comes for a visit and puts me into a sort of coma..." Daniel says, continuing on down his list.

I blink, "coma?"

"Well, it was like a coma but I was still dreaming, I remember you mentioning... but Shifu was actually 'teaching' me. Actually, he presented to idea of what would happen to me if I had the genetic knowledge of the Goa'uld," Daniel babbled.

"I was there?" Sam had noticed my confusion, Daniel hasn't yet.

"Yeah, you were trying to figure me out while down the hall the Tok'ra Aldwin was interviewing him with a Zatarc Detector. You were even there when he turned into energy and floated out of the room."

I blink a couple more times, "doesn't sound familiar."

Since we had been doing this for over a three hours, the change in gears was unexpected. "It doesn't?" Daniel blinked. I rub my head trying to remember what was happening around that time. "I don't have a more detailed list of what ha-happened," Daniel reaches for another clipboard and fumbles around, "between General Hammond's blackmail and Shifu's appearance..."

I sigh, "when was that?"

Daniel glances at his paper, "first part of 2000."

My mind races. That was about when we met the Aschen. Did they ever meet the Aschen? If they knew how powerful they are would they try to ally themselves despite my warning, planing to use the Aschen or something and then turn on them once the Goa'uld are gone? Why is our realities identical up to that point?

"I think I might know where we split off." The other two look at me expectantly and curiously, "but, I guess it's not really something I want to repeat... I'd rather tell you all at once..."

I was on the spot. Why was I afraid of some people who are so much like my close friends? Maybe I feel intimidated by O'Neill, this General was more serious and that scared me.

I swallow, "in the year 2000," I begin, "we met some aliens who were our dreams-come-true." The others cock an eyebrow in unison, "they defeated the Goa'uld..." it's understandable that they're impressed, but can't they hear the overlaying tone in my voice? "They cure all disease, slowed the aging process, and completely revolutionized our planet."

"I sense a 'but...'" General O'Neill observes.

"You, or rather the other Colonel O'Neill was also quite suspicious, but we all told him to calm down. I mean, we've accepted trade with aliens who could help us but they turned out bad. But we told him that this was not the same, these people were good. So he went his separate way. I don't think he ever forgave us...

"Years past. We hadn't heard from Colonel O'Neill in a long time. At the 10-year Anniversary of forming a treaty with... these aliens, Sam, Daniel, and Teal'c showed up for the ceremony and it was there that Sam and I chatted about her and her husband." I am staring at the table and my hands, so if there were any glances, I missed them, "she and Joe had been trying to have children, but were unable for three years. The alien doctors said she and Joe were fine, but I told her to let me give her a checkup. Since doctors were no longer needed, it wasn't like I'd be doing much else. My results said that there was no way she would ever have children," I wonder what their faces look like at this point, but the table is so fascinating. "Our alien allies had lied to her. To all of us. "

"World-wide infertility, right?" Daniel guesses. I stare at him with wide eyes.

"The Aschen!" Sam sees what Daniel's getting at.

"You've met them?" I ask, shocked. Oh no.

"Yes, but it was in 2001," Daniel explains, "we met a world who were allies with them. We got a close look at their history. There was an expansive city, covered in farmland, undiscovered by the locals."

"We became suspicious when the Aschen homeworld turned out to be one we had been warned not to go to." Teal'c says. My eyes dart to him, stunned.

General O'Neill says smiling, "We gave them a nice set of gate addresses including a black hole."

Sam notices that I'm frozen. "Janet, what is it?"

I say suddenly, "tell me about this warning."

"It was a piece a paper," O'Neill says confused, "with my handwriting and signature saying not to go to P4X whatever..."

"Where did it come from?" I ask forcefully.

"Through the gate," Sam explains, "We never did understand where it came from or when the Colonel wrote it... Or when it came from, for that matter."

I can't hold it in. My face falls into my hands and the tears begin to flow. "It worked," I cry. Sam moves to put a hand on my shoulder. I throw my hands around her neck and cry on her shoulder, "it worked," I repeat, "you didn't die in vain."

The men are all uncomfortable. Daniel shifts in his seat and blinks, "who died?"

I pull myself together; Sam sits next to me. "When we realized the Aschen were plotting our destruction, we put into motion a plan to stop it from ever happening."

Sam watches with deep interest. I continue, "We used the Aschen's own computer against them and predicted a solar flare. I went to Chulak to signal to Teal'c to go back to Earth... They had to dial the gate and get the note through in a limited amount of time, past a whole slew of automated defenses... all before they missed the solar flare..." my voice cracks. I try to hold it in.

I hear O'Neill say softly, "That explains the blood..."

"I didn't want to return directly to Earth because I didn't want to mess anything up, so I went to the Land of Light from Chulak. I wanted to help, but they wanted someone to be around incase... they failed. But after a time, I went anyway. I was shocked to establish a wormhole, and that made me worry more. Come to think of it... I vaguely remember the event horizon flickering... The trip was violent and freezing, and I saw a flash of my Earth... with all four of you...dead..." I fight to pull myself together, "before I found myself in your world's airport." Sam's eyes went wide.

O'Neill asks curious, "Why does that sound vaguely like our trip to 1969?"

"Yeah, and you know what this means?" Sam looks around excitedly.

"What?" O'Neill, ever playing more dumb than necessary.

"First off," Sam turns toward me, "what year was that?"

I'm confused, "when? When we met the Aschen?"

"No," Sam excitedly gestures with her hands, "when you sent the note, discovered their secret and all."

"2010."

Sam grins, "Janet, are you aware that the year here, is 2005?"

This surprises me. I didn't know I time-traveled too.

"Don't you realize what this means?" Sam excitedly asks the group, "Janet may not be from an alternate reality at all!"

She has our full attention now.

"Maybe Janet's SG-1 did succeed and somehow the effects hadn't reached her yet."

"Is that possible?" General O'Neill doubtfully inquires.

"I don't know," Sam continues, "theoretically, if they changed time, the effects would be instantaneous. But our working knowledge of parallel universes and time-travel is very limited, so the possibility exists, and there's no way to know how her gating to Earth lined up with the time-change. I mean, we've seen the Stargate do strange things with time. Then there's the fact that wormholes have a dimension of their own...

"Maybe the wormhole Janet was in protected her from the change like a bubble. And as reality as we know it changed, she was released where she should have gone. And like when we went to 1969, real briefly, she was in her own time and reality. The thing is" Sam concludes, "it makes sense, Janet is simply from an alternate future and with the flare and such, was thrown only half as far into the past as the note had traveled!"

We all took this in.

I was in my quarters later, and my eyes are still red from crying. Daniel pokes his head in, and he brings coffee. "Hey, you feeling better?"

My heart jumps and I smile through my tears, "yes actually. Granted I've got five years of catching up to do. But even if you won't let me work in the Stargate program anymore, at least I can still be a real doctor, unlike those other doctors who will cure all your diseases for a price!" I'm pacing around the room. Daniel sits down and starts sipping some coffee. I continue, "I'm in a world where everyone survives! Hammond is alive, so is Cassie, and you weren't killed by the Aschen!"

"Not everyone made it," Daniel says quietly into his coffee. "Joe was killed when he stalled the Aschen long enough to save Sam, and Earth."

I sit down. I had gotten to know Joe very well over the last couple years. Daniel adds, "There were others who died..."

"Sam mentioned something about you dying..."

He chuckles, but then frowns.

"I died too, didn't I?"

Daniel looks up, "Who-..." He looks confused.

"It didn't take long to catch on," I respond.

He sighs, "It was hard on all of us." He looks down, he looks so hurt. Was it harder on him? I sigh. Why does he have to look so attractive when he's down? I want to hug him.

"I imagine your death was probably hard on me." I look at him understandingly. He nods.

"Dr. Fraiser?" Teal'c voice of concern comes through the door. I turn around startled, tears falling. I am watching the documentary about heroes and my funeral service for the second time. I turn it off as he comes in. "Is it wise to be watching this?"

"I...I wanted to know." Teal'c sits down next to me. I continue, "It's not everyday you get to see your own funeral."

"This was a particularly rough assignment for Colonel Carter," Teal'c says. I just stare at the blank screen. Teal'c picks up the remote and rewinds the video. "Emmett Bregman did an excellent job on this."

"Who?"

"A reporter to whom you had familiarity. I do believe you had dinner at least twice."

"And then I died." I sigh. I had no idea how much I would be missed.

Ironic. Two different Earths, stemming from the same timeline, but in one I survived yet the six closest people to me did not. And in this world... I'm the one that's dead.

On a far off barren world

She's desperate. She needs to evacuate, now! But where to go?

She dials the gate to the Tau'ri homeworld. She doesn't have an IDC, but she hopes her communicator still works.

"Stargate Command, this is Jalen of the Tok'ra, we need emergency evacuation and medical help, may you please allow us admittance?"

A voice over the communicator is heard, "is there no other location to which you can rerout?"

"No, and many are still dying, Please!"

"This is General O'Neill," a new voice replies, "if memory serves, we've met before."

"I met a Colonel O'Neill once on Vorash before it's evacuation," Jalen replies, "if you are the same. I was base manager at the time you had arrived with Cronos' mothership. We also met when we received your distress signal and offered assistance."

Jalen desperately waits for a moment before she hears him say, "alright, for starters, only you come over."

The Tok'ra complies and limps through the gate. Once her foot lands on the Tau'ri's ramp, she looks up to their control room where O'Neill stands, "alright, proceed to bring your people through."

Jalen breathes a sigh of relief and instructs her people to follow her through the Stargate to Earth.

PA: Medical Team to the Gateroom! Repeat, medical emergency teams to the Gateroom!

I poke my head out the door. I look at the security officer who reads my mind and calls over the walkie-talkie to see what's going on.

"A group of Tok'ra were ambushed, almost everyone of them is seriously injured."

"I can help!"

The officer sighs, she looks like she wants to let me, but doesn't know if she'll be able to, "Janet Fraiser would really like to help."

"I'm not sure if that would be... appropriate."

"Why not!" I demand, "I know I'm like a ghost to you, but if things are as serious as they sound, I'm sure you could stand to have some more help! Yes, I haven't had much practice in the last ten years, but my skills are still above nursing levels!" The SF is holding the walkie toward me to catch my yelled demands.

Several medics running a couple of stretchers to the infirmary interrupt the conversation. I can't take it any longer, I immediately run to the side of one of the stretchers. One of the nurses I remember, Jim, I ask him what is going on. At first he seemed nervous with me, but he got back to business, it is all coming back, it's like I'm still back with the SGC back before the Aschen.

It's chaos in the infirmary. I run to the next bed. He was shot in the hip. It looks pretty bad. If he wasn't Tok'ra, there was a possibility we'd have to amputate, but since he's Tok'ra, I'll give him a chance. I start tending to his wound.

He shuns me, "my symbiote will heal me." I roll my eyes.

"Having a Tok'ra doesn't make you immortal, let us give him a hand, hmm?" I call to one of the nurses, "Let's get this man some dressing and stitches, then move him out of the way for one of the critically wounded."

The next bed, the woman was shot in the torso, can't tell how extensive the damage is. Surprisingly, she's conscious. She groans and says, "My symbiote may still yet heal me,"

What is it with these guys and their symbiotes? I ask, "Can I speak to your symbiote?"

"She is weak..."

"Let me speak to her." The Tok'ra closes her eyes and when they open they flash. "How much internal bleeding is there?"

"The blast was deep," She spoke deeply and tiredly, "it damaged some of the surrounding organs..."

"What can we do?" I question her all the way to surgery.

"We're running out of places to put these people," I run, out of breath to tell General O'Neill who is standing with Col. Carter and the Tok'ra Jalen.

"What are you..." General O'Neill starts but stops himself.

"We are in the depths of a mountain, correct?" Jalen inquires when O'Neill regains his composure.

"That's correct," Carter replies.

"May I see a layout of is base?"

The General blinks and says, "Uh, no."

Carter gives him a dirty look. O'Neill notices and adds, "I mean, I really can't allow that..."

"That is understandable." Jalen says firmly and suddenly moves out of the room to another down the hall. We follow. While Jalen inspects the wall, I see to the patient who was in the room.

"Is there nothing behind this wall?" the Tok'ra inquires.

"Nothing but miles of bedrock," Carter replies in confusion as Jalen begins digging around in her bag.

"Why," O'Neill demands, "what do you plan to..."

Before O'Neill knew it, Jalen was jamming a crystal into the wall, upon release, the concrete gives way to the crystallized hallway being formed, heading off from their position. The Tok'ra patient seems unfazed.

"Sweet!" O'Neill finds himself saying before he could stop. He recomposes himself and half-yells at the Tok'ra, "you know, you could have asked before you did that!"

"I apologize," Jalen responds, "may I continue to make more rooms from this tunnel I have already created?"

"Alright," O'Neill says as if it's a favor.

As Jalen heads down her new hallway, Carter leans in to whisper to her superior, "Sir, having some extra tunnels and rooms on base could come in handy. Not to mention a possible advantage some rooms not in the computers might give us in possible foothold or NID situations or something."

"Yeah," O'Neill smirks.

Jalen comes back, "When the others are better, in here we can set up our temporary operation until we can leave."

"And... when would that be?" O'Neill asks skeptically.

"It may be a few months, it depends when we can find a way to contact the rest of the Tok'ra..."

"What! We don't have room..."

"But...I just made room," Jalen didn't seem to understand.

"Sir," Sam interrupts. "There are fewer of them then of the Haktyl Jaffa we gave sanctuary to for a time... and there are fewer horses and children, so they shouldn't be a problem..."

General O'Neill says cautiously, "yes, but horses and children aren't a security risk..."

Jalen and I stand uncomfortably as we watch them argue.

"Sir, can I recommend we discuss it and let them stay at least until they are well enough to travel?" Sam argues.

"Carter!" General O'Neill barks and signals for her to follow where they can talk out of Jalen's hearing range.

"I do not understand why he dislikes us so," Jalen's host murmurs to me, "he has done us favors in the past and we have come through for him..."

I sigh, "look, I haven't seen much of him in the last four years" the details aren't important, "and I haven't totally caught up, but it seems to be more personal to him now. It's worse than it used to be for him which was simply a distrust and annoyance of the Tok'ra. Do you know if a Tok'ra has done something to him in the last few years?"

"No, we have been in a cutoff base for years."

I sigh as regrets start to resurface.

"... How many people are you condemning here? GOOD people, who need YOUR help! Yet you despise them all because you taught one of their people the importance of taking care of each other!"

"This is not specifically about Kanan, Carter! How many times have they just screwed us over, no matter what we do for them!"

"They are our allies, sir! Even the Tollen you've respected more!"

"Ahem," I interrupt.

"Could you at least have an SF on your tail!" O'Neill demands of me.

"Actually, I lost her back at the infirmary," I apologize, "I can't sit back and watch, General."

O'Neill sighs, "was there something you wanted?"

I swallow a lump in my throat. "Jack," I don't think he's used to me calling him that, "where I come from, a lot of allies and good people were lost. Especially with the Tok'ra. Many were slaughtered right along side the Goa'uld. I mean, it makes sense not to warn them since the Goa'uld might find out about it... at least that was their reasoning... But the Aschen's bio-weapons were indiscriminate."

Sam studies me, "that sounds like the Tok'ra's symbiote poison. Very deadly stuff."

"You mean the Tok'ra would create something like that?" she nods to me, but I'm confused, "why then haven't you used it to defeat the Goa'uld like the Aschen did? If you were capable of it, why are our timelines still so very different?"

"Because the symbiote poison would kill Goa'uld, Tok'ra, and Jaffa alike. The death toll for the Jaffa alone would be unthinkable... and has already cost too many lives."

I'm stunned by this, "you know, they never talk about how many Jaffa were killed..." I lean back against a wall because standing seems to have become difficult. "Sam and I theorized that the Aschen had some control over the media... Jaffa would have died... but they made it sound alright, necessary casualties or something." Tears form in my eyes; I put my hand over my mouth, "No wonder the Jaffa hated us! What had we done! What had we done! Countless Jaffa were killed and I never even thought about it! Thousands? Millions? And they made it sound okay!" I have slid down and am now sitting on the floor with my knees pulled up under my chin. I'm in shock. "How could we have been so ignorant! We really hadn't heard from any of our other allies! The Aschen must have been keeping them away to prevent them from interfering with what they were doing to us! And we just let it happen!"

I feel the familiar hug of my best friend, no matter what timeline.

Emotions and random thoughts fly through my mind and I remember my surroundings. My head shoots up and I glare at General O'Neill, "and you! Be grateful that you're allies are only annoying and are just as imperfect as you are!" I snap, "be grateful they aren't slowly coiling around your neck and choking you to death and all the while blinding you from the truth!"

General O'Neill doesn't say anything, he just stands looking down at me.

I could tell he was thinking of all the things he hated about the Tok'ra, but all the while he knew they really were good people. O'Neill bites his lip and turns to Sam, "tell the Tok'ra they can stay as long as they need, but not to push it." With that, he turns and heads down the hallway.

Sam walks me to the infirmary. Sam hopes to bump into Jalen and try to work things out. As we draw near, I hear a medical alarm go off. My automatic doctor mode turns on and I run into the infirmary. One of the severely injured Tok'ra is going into shock. The other doctors and nurses rush to help, as well as a minor-ly injured Tok'ra who wants to help her friend. Sam keeps her out of the way. We try everything, but we knew, from the beginning, it would be a struggle for the symbiote to heal the host. The monitor goes flat line. I don't know that much about Tok'ra, should I keep trying? Then I hear the other Tok'ra say sadly, "that's it, Jakse could not do anything more for Kih." I take her word for it, if there's nothing more we can do for the host, I move on to help the next patient.

"What about the symbiote? Is there anything we can do for him?"

"He may be too weak to leave the host," she says sadly, knowing that she is probably losing two friends here today.

"Can we remove him without hurting him?" Sam's eyes go wide at my question, Tau'ri usually ask that question in reverse.

The Tok'ra responds, "I-I don't know."

"Well, it's worth a try" I say, knowing that if the host won't be able to make it, hopefully the symbiote may yet be saved. We rush the body to surgery and attempt to remove the symbiote. When we had the skin out of the way, the symbiote was able to wriggle it's way out, but too tired to do too much, so we rushed him to a tank to rest.

Later that day, another host dies, but this time, the symbiote dies with it.

"Of the 17 Tok'ra that came to our base three days ago," I state at the briefing where seated was O'Neill, SG-1, Jalen and another Tok'ra leader, Rian, "Six came in with minor injuries. Four had more serious injuries, but with the combined effort of my medical staff and the symbiote, those injuries are healing well. There are three Tok'ra who were critically wounded but from what I've seen over the last three days, I believe they will pull through. There has been one Tok'ra fatality, both host and symbiote died. There were two hosts that died, the symbiotes could not heal them and are in stasis for now. And there is a last one where the symbiote is really struggling, but I don't know if the host will be able to pull through." I try to make this report not sound too cold referring to these beings as 'symbiote' and 'host'. But I also didn't want to depress the Tok'ra in the room who have lost friends in the last few days.

"Sure, save the snake..." I hear O'Neill mutter under his breath. I don't think the Tok'ra heard.

"Sir, if I may say," Sam says quietly, she must have heard him too, "but saving the symbiote is the last thing you can do for a dying host. When I lost Lantash, I lost all I had left of Martouf as well."

The general nods uncomfortably.

"The victims who are recovering well, we are moving to the Tok'ra tunnels where we are setting up a small base of operations," Rian says.

"Base of operations?" O'Neill asks suspiciously.

"You are welcome to inspect it at any time," Jalen says respectfully.

"What are you going to do with these symbiotes?" O'Neill asks her, down to business.

"All we really can do is keep them in stasis until a suitable host can be found."

O'Neill gives a sympathetic nod, almost as if he realizes that these are friends that they have to lock up in a bottle.

"Sir, if I may be so bold," I perk up, "I know you probably wouldn't believe this, but there may be willing hosts right under your nose."

Sam and Daniel sit down with me in the commissary later, I am working on my PA speech.

"Would either of you do it?" Daniel asks, "become a host, I mean?"

Sam and I look at each other as we thought about it. I say to Daniel, "I can understand why you wouldn't want to, with you tendency to have people close to you become Goa'uld hosts..." I sigh as I shut my mouth.

"You know," Sam changes focus, "after Jolinar, I thought I would never want to go through that again..." Sam hesitates, "But there is one symbiote I would be host to, I think. If my dad were to be injured beyond repair, and there was no other available host, I would take on Selmak, because, I think it would be what Dad would want."

"You'd have to leave the SGC." Daniel says.

"Yeah, that's only if there were NO other hosts. How about you Janet?"

"Well, the long life option wouldn't be tempting because I'm already going to live a little longer than the rest of you." The others give me a look. "It's an anti-aging vaccine that the Aschen gave us... Trojan Horse..." I add under my breath. "Though a symbiote could probably heal the infertility I probably have too, if I wanted to have children..." I avoid eye contact, "Though I have become pretty fond of adoption." We smile at each other.

"Speaking of children, did you ever get married in your alternate future?" Sam asks me, changing the topic.

"No, after the Stargate program was shut down, I dated around," I gave Daniel a quick glance, I hope he didn't notice, "but nothing ever became of anything." After all, my timeline did come to a sudden end... "How about you?" I change the topic, "Who is this Pete?"

"He's a police officer." Sam smiles happily.

"When's the date?"

"We haven't set one yet."

"Well, don't put off having children, you never know when you won't be able to have any anymore." Sam smiles at me, I continue, "Besides, all those radiation treatments I put you through..."

Daniel is really getting into his food. I think the conversation has become too uncomfortable for him. So I decide to make it even more uncomfortable.

"And how about you?" He perks up from his food. "Any new girls in your life?" He sits and thinks for a moment, I hesitate before I ask, "did...did Sarah survive?"

Daniel clears his throat, "Yeah, the Tok'ra were able to remove Osiris. She's working in the archeological division of Area 51 now, actually."

"Oh?" Sam asks with interest.

"But, she... uh, kind of wants to move on. The whole Osiris thing... kind of traumatic." He picks at his broccoli.

"Ahh..." I kick myself for asking.

Daniel looks at his watch, "Hey, I've got some stuff I need to show Jack, I'll talk to you guys later."

There was a silence before Sam asks me, hesitantly and quietly, "Hey Janet, did... did General... er... Colonel O'Neill ever get married?"

I wince, "no," I bite my lip, "after we wouldn't listen to him, he felt as if he had no friends among us so he cut himself off from people and lived in Minnesota in seclusion."

"Ah," Sam shifts.

"You know," I continue on, "I've been wondering what would have happened in the same sort of reality as this one, only Joe survived." Sam narrowed her eyes to study me. "Although you and Joe would have gone out a couple more times, you would still have the SGC, making your teammates the men you would spend the most time with and much less opportunities for Joe and his schedule." I wonder where I'm leading with this anyway. "I guess, the thing is... the Colonel had the hardest time when you didn't believe him and I think that you marrying Joe may of contributed to the seclusion..."

This obviously is distressing her, oops.

"He wouldn't have encouraged me to be happy and be dishonest about his opinion on the subject, would he?" she inquires. " Guess what I'm trying to say is... he wouldn't encourage me to marry one man, and then kick himself about it forever, would he?"

"Nah," I reply, "he was brutally honest with us all by that time."

There's a pause before I ask, "Was there... was there anything ever between your Janet and Daniel?"

"You know what, I don't know. I mean, I know you guys went out a couple of times, but I don't know if it was ever more than friends. I mean, he really went out of his way to be there for you when Cassie was really sick. Though we all did stuff as friends. Daniel would often take me on dates, but that was usually after one of...my guys died." She hesitates, "He would try to help me get my mind off things."

"Did you two... ever become close?" I ask.

"No... you know Daniel, always holding out for someone who's out of reach."

I roll my eyes at her and smirk, "Yeah, Daniel's the one whose doing that..."

She blushes and lowers her head. I tap her on the shoulder, "well, I'm going to stop by the infirmary before I go make this announcement."

I check on the most critical Tok'ra, the one that we were not yet sure if the host was going to survive or not. She rouses from her sleep and asks me tiredly, deeply, "What is wrong with him?" I look at the patient who occupies the bed next to her. He's an SGC soldier who's been in the infirmary since before I got here.

"He was injured in a battle a little while ago and has been in a coma for little less than a week."

"Will he make it?" The symbiote asks concerned.

"Yes, we think he will be coming out of the coma in a couple of days." I hesitate.

"But...?" The Tok'ra asks.

"He took a blast in his lower spine. He's paralyzed. He won't be able to be a part of the SGC anymore."

The patient starts coughing up blood. "Whoa, take it easy." I soothe as I tend to her.

"I'm not going to make it." It's the host talking now. "Tevel won't give up. She keeps on fighting to keep me alive."

"Hey, let her."

The host gives a laugh that turns into a cough, "I am old, we have been together for many years, I worry she is afraid of change."

"Attention all personnel, as you are all aware, many wounded Tok'ra have taken up temporary residence in the SGC. For us Tau'ri, the idea of being a Tok'ra host can often sound unappealing, so the question has never been fully asked. Being a Tok'ra host is a major change and commitment that many of us wouldn't be readily willing to accept, but I know there can be people in this very base that wish they could do more, or get more out of life. Being a Tok'ra host will certainly keep you on your toes. As a host, you can see new worlds, learn all sorts of new things, great health benefits and you will always have someone to talk to and understand you. And they have a great dental plan!

"Some of our Tok'ra guests have lost not only their hosts but also close friends. If you would be willing to make that decision and become a host and give help to our allies, please contact us as soon as possible but not without careful consideration. Please give thought on your family situation and the knowledge that you would be leaving Earth and would rarely visit. You have but to ask any of the local Tok'ra about the benefits of blending and you have but to ask General O'Neill all the negative details. But please, if the possibilities for you may actually be worth considering, than please do so."

I look up from the microphone. Walter gives me a nod of approval and so I pick up and start to move out of the control room. Suddenly Walter gets a ring.

"Dr. Fraiser?" He calls, "You're needed in the infirmary right away."

When I get to the infirmary, I push past the doctors and nurses around the critical Tok'ra, her monitor is flat line.

I inquire what happened and a doctor responds, "I think the symbiote couldn't go any longer."

"It couldn't," a shy nurse draws our attention, "the snake, symbiote, whatever...I saw it! It went into... into him!"

I rush to the side of the paralyzed SG-team-member who was in the bed near the dying host.

"Ahh..." I say sadly "I thought she might do that." The others look to me for an explanation. "The symbiote wasn't sure she could heal her host. I guess when she did as much as she could, she realized she wouldn't be able to heal her, and moved to the officer here, who's injuries would be easier for her to heal. She felt sympathetic to him..." The others look like the symbiote had violated the human. "Don't worry, after she has heal him, she will leave him and join the others in the stasis chamber."

"Are you so sure?"

"Don't worry, the Tok'ra will make sure of it." The others look at me, I move to leave, "Call me when he's awake."

I met up with Daniel to grab some food from the Commissary. "You think General O'Neill might consider letting me get some variety in eating locations eventually?" I ask, "I've been craving a seafood restaurant lately."

"Well, Jack apparently has been letting you wander around without too tight of a leash," Daniel points out, "I think he'll eventually figure something out and you'll be allowed to get off of the base."

I grin and distractedly pick at my food, "would you be willing to show me a good restaurant that is still around?" I glance up at him carefully, "just you and me?"

Daniel smiles, "sure, I'd be happy to."

I enter the infirmary after being informed that the paralyzed officer is awake. When I enter, he is lifting his legs and experimenting with moving his toes. I cross my clipboard in my arms. "How you feeling, soldier?"

He sits up excited. "This is incredible, last this I remember I was being told I could never walk again."

I smile, "How is Tevel?"

He considers for a moment, "sad" he responds truthfully.

"That's understandable," I respond, "Captain, would you be willing to remain Tevel's host until a replacement is found? We hope it will be a good bit less than a week."

"Sure!" He responds much more willing than I expected. He pauses in a daze, "Wow, she's smart..." I don't think he's really talking to me, just thinking out loud, "I think she'd love Battlestar Galactica..."

"Hey, Doc," O'Neill greets as he casually strolls into the infirmary, "how's things holding up?"

"Well, Sir, Captain Durst will be well enough to leave tomorrow morning, I think," I reply, "but I figured you'd want to have a chat with him and his temporary symbiote about what they can and can't do and all of that..."

General O'Neill nods and is quiet before he gets to his point, "They have a Zatarc Detector," he bluntly states.

We're sort of avoiding eye contact at the moment. "I noticed that the medical staff has been keeping an eye on me and I'm rarely alone, so I've assumed that you still have your doubts, and I don't blame you, sir." I face him finally, "when?"

That evening, I check on Durst in order to keep my mind off tomorrow's test. I brought a portable TV and we were watching it when Daniel comes in. I stand up from where I had been sitting next to the captain and went to talk to him.

"Hey," He says in hushed tones, "what's going on?"

"Durst mentioned that he thought Tevel would be interested in some TV, I thought it'd be nice to have something to do while they recover."

"Ah, is this that new Battlestar Galactica show?" We sit back aways so that our conversation doesn't interrupt the show for the officer and Tok'ra.

"Oh, you've heard of it?" I smirk, "I figured you were more a History Channel International type of person."

He chuckles quietly, "Actually, there are a lot of historical references in the storyline, especially the lost tribes of Israel." He chuckles again. "This reminds me of when I got my appendix out."

I laugh, "Yes, uh, this portable TV has come in handy."

"I really enjoyed that." He looks at me.

"Well, I figured you'd feel lonely..." I look away and then add, "So I, uh, thought Indiana Jones could keep you company." I look back to see his eyes still on me.

"Thanks."

I smile but fall quiet.

"What?" He asks softly.

"Hmm?"

"Is there something bothering you?"

I sigh, "The, uh, Zatarc test, it's... been on my mind."

"Nervous?" I hesitate before I nod. He gives me reassuring pat on the back. "Don't worry."

"What's to worry about?" I give a false laugh, "for all I know, the last ten years for me are just implanted memories!" Daniel wraps an arm around my shoulder and I feel more comforted.

In the Tok'ra's new wing of the base, Jalen has set up the interrogation room. Daniel and Teal'c join O'Neill as observers while Sam is the one who will question me.

I don't realize how little I'm breathing. In all honesty, I think I'm scared again. These things nearly condemned my friends by misdiagnosing a partial-truth as a lie and false memory. It can be picky in determining truth and fabrication.

Sam turns on a video recorder that's positions to watch me and to be able to see the swirling blue readout that says if I'm being totally honest or not. She takes a breath, "Please state what your full given name is."

"Janet Nicole Fraiser," I state carefully.

"How old are you?"

"I was born in 1968, yet I am 42 years old due to having lived five extra years... if the date really is 2005."

She continues to question me in more detail about my alternate time-line and events leading up to the time-traveling note. I get more detailed in my descriptions than I had before, just to be on the safe side. I guess I may have been trying to forget how different I am than them.

Sam glances at General O'Neill to confirm that so far my story checks out.

"So many of us were still around in your future? Except General Hammond, for one," Sam's question stabs me. There was one death that I avoided talking about but the others might have guessed at. I wish I hadn't thought of it, now I have to tell to turn that red-lair light to the blue-honest light.

"One person..." I swallow my tongue, "that we're all rather fond of... did not make it." My eyes tear up, "My daughter grew sick and determined to go back to the world she was born on... working hospitals that could diagnose her condition were becoming rare, and the one place that would have worked, the SGC infirmary, was now a museum. While trying to get an Aschen doctor... she ran away and ran to D.C. where she gated to Hanaka... I was able to get a team to go after her, including Sam and Daniel." I choke, "We found Cassie in an abandoned Goa'uld lab... and it was too late to save her."

Sam stares at me in amazement, "I guess we were lucky that a teenager couldn't sneak through our gate," Sam comments, "I'm sorry."

So we've covered my background story and that seems to check out... which means my last ten years worth of memories aren't false or anything, which is nice to know, I guess. So Sam moves on to a line of questioning I wasn't prepared for.

"What are your intentions now?"

"Excuse me?" I blink, not having thought about it before. "Um, I guess since I'm stuck here, what I'd really like to do is pick up when I left off." I wonder how the detector takes answers that I hadn't even decided on before now. "I mean, the Janet you knew, is me, really, with four years of amnesia and ten years of alternate memories, but I'm the same person," I'm almost begging for this to be truth.

"Yes, maybe we may be feeling like we're betraying the memories of our past-on friends, but we're the same people! Same universe! I just want to be the Janet you knew again!" Okay, I'm definitely begging now, "think about it: we've been given an opportunity here. I died. But now I have the chance to continue living, even if I've had an experience that no one else here knows what it's like.

"As far as I can tell from your reactions and the blurry reflection of the Zatarc Detector's readout in the video recorder, the world I came from was real! I've seen a no-longer possible future, but I'm still Janet. I just want to help people again. Do the job I loved again! Be with the people I loved again. All I ask is you give me a chance to take my place again in your lives."

"You've been given your Janet back," I continue in firm breaths, "and I've been given the chance to help save my world from the future I've seen." My voice cracks, "I've been given a chance to fix my mistakes." My eyes are fixed on Sam. "A chance to save my... friends." My eyes and thoughts shift to Daniel. From the corner of my eyes I see a hint of red. Oh, I shouldn't have done that. Holding something back equals lying on that thing... What's done is done, I have to say it, "...to save the ones I ... love." I eye Daniel down. Curse this retched thing.

Sam shifts uncomfortably and my attention is back to her. She hates to do to us exactly what was put on herself and the general years before. "Were you... closer to some of us more than others."

I think I've gone red. "Colonel O'Neill had shut himself out from us. The rest of us had seen little of each other before the anniversary. Sam and I grew close, spending as much time together as possible. But there was one person I really wanted to spend more time with. We spent time together in our last days, but I don't know if my desire to just be with him was reciprocated as more than friends, but I never found out," I found myself looking at Daniel again, tears formed in my eyes. "...before, he died."

Sam still doesn't seem satisfied with the results, "I hate to put you through this, but can you describe the last time you saw each of us, and how you felt."

"Daniel and I went to the terminal together. I had my travel documents ready to go." I look at Daniel, he's looking at the floor with his arms tightly folded. "Before I started down the escalator, Daniel gave me a nod and my hand a squeeze. I nodded back and headed through the security check. We gave each other a parting wave before I entered the gate for Chulak. The look he gave me made my heart shrivel." I was able to hold back a sob, "I knew it would be the last time. I felt sick before and after the wormhole travel. I gave Teal'c's arm a farewell squeeze before he left for Earth. I didn't want to left go." my eye brows grew scrunched, "I should have given him a hug." My face fell into my hands, "I should have given them all a hug."

I hear Sam give a sigh of relief. I look up to see the detector had turned blue. O'Neill grumbles, "Blasted thing, it tortures your emotions before it'll turn blue!" I'm rather touched that General O'Neill is sympathetic to me now that he's accepted me for who I am.

Jalen is at the side taking notes, "Yes, I have noticed it has a tendency to get hung up on hidden emotions...I apologize."

Even as the others start moving out of the room, I resolve to avoid Daniel as much as possible after that. I start by seeking out the Tok'ra leader to chat with her one-on-one.

"Jalen," I call to her, "can I have a word?"

"You wish to speak with me?" she translates.

"Yeah," the others are gone, I take a deep breath, "I had a history teacher once say something like: if we do not learn from our past and history, we're doomed to repeat it."

"Wise words," Jalen says simply to let me know I have her attention.

"Well, my past is not anyone else's history, but I still want to keep it from happening again. I thought it I could spread around," I begin, "it may become a parable or something, but still people could relate why we're not meant to have the galaxy handed to us on a silver platter..."

I tell her my tale. Hopefully my tale will remind the Tok'ra, the Tau'ri, and whoever would listen that all that is good in the universe is worth fighting for...

I am on my way to the infirmary to meet General O'Neill. When I enter, there are three people in SG uniforms and a woman in civilian clothing. Sam and Jalen also join us.

"These," O'Neill says reluctantly, "Are your volunteers."

My eyes burst open, I was shocked to see "You all don't mind leaving?"

O'Neill clears his throat and begins the introduction. "This is Captain Kaufman. His sister, Tanja," He motions to the civilian, "is the volunteer. The captain came to me after you made the announcement and basically asked permission to tell her about the...opportunity. We agreed on what he could tell her, and if she accepted, we would tell her the rest here with no going back."

"Why?"

"I have AIDS," Tanja spoke up, "I just... want to make a difference."

"She always had a thing for aliens..." her brother inputs.

"They're in the middle of a war," O'Neill says irritated.

"A war that can help protect Earth?" Tanja inserts. "I'm a lot more useful to an alien as a means of transportation than dead!"

O'Neill nods and backs off.

"This is Lt. Royal." O'Neill continued, "His reason is more a long the lines of not being satisfied with his life..."

"That's not it." Royal is a short stalky officer, "I'm not that bright, and I'm not that strong, but I can do a lot more with them than I can walking these halls all of the time. That's all I do, patrol. I want to be useful!"

"And you know Ensign Srawts." The last volunteer is the SF that had been my leash and guard when I first came to this timeline.

She shrugs, "What can I say, the concept of having an alien inside of me, split personalities... it fascinates me." I could see the general rolling his eyes.

"Well, I guess you can meet the symbiotes." I say nervously, not knowing where to begin, I've never done anything like this before. I wonder if the other Janet had...

"Durst is temporary host to Tevel..." I walk to Durst's bed where we is sitting up.

"Doctor?" Captain Durst asks, "I was wondering... could I stay host to Tevel?"

"Are you sure that's what you want? To leave the SGC and join the Tokra?" I ask him tenderly.

"I'm not close to my family, say I died saving another, which is kinda true. Tevel has told me a lot about the Tokra, I would be proud to help them."

"I don't know how to take all of you wanting to leave the SGC so readily..." General O'Neill grumbles.

"With all due respect sir..." Strawts says openly, "SG-1 get's all the action..." Sam gently walks over the SF, pulls her aside and explains to her why she doesn't want all the action, the whole risk, loosing loved ones...whole SG teams being lost... that sort of thing.

O'Neill brings up, "How do we know that this is really what Durst wants?"

"Actually," Durst says nervously, "while she says I'm great and all, she has always had female hosts in the past, so I'm not exactly her first choice. It's really my choice and she'll prove it to you."

Durst stands up, walks to the tank where the two hostless symbiotes were, takes a canister and fills it with the salt water from the tank. Durst opens his mouth and out shoots Tevel into the canister. Durst takes a moment to recover. "This is what I want general. Sharing your body with an alien can cause you to make friends fast."

"No wife or kids? Other responsibilities you may be trying to avoid?" O'Neill questions. Durst fervently shakes his head. O'Neill finally gives a nod and Durst puts the canister back up towards his mouth through which Tevel jumped back into her host.

Well, I guess that Tevel is a he now... Jalen goes over and chats with Tevel/Durst.

"So..." I start, "Which volunteer doesn't become a Tok'ra?"

O'Neill walks over to the group, arms folded. "Ms. Kaufman obviously should." O'Neill walks infront of Strawts. She keeps her military composure while she looks like she wants to complain. "With...all due respect... Royal is significantly older than you, so I trust his decision to be more... well-thought-out, I should say. Give it two months. If you still desperately want to be a Tokra, then you can run off and hang out with them until one of their hosts keel over."

"So, would you like to meet your new, roommates, shall I say?" I walk Royal and Tanja over to the tank, accompanied by Tevel/Durst to make the introductions.

"Now," Daniel reassures her, "she's the same person, only that last four years have been different for her and she's experienced a possible future."

Daniel stands in my doorway with the person he's talking to out of sight. When he seems confident, he brings the other person in.

We're both stunned for a moment and don't know what to say.

"Mom?" she finally gets out.

"Cassie!" I sob as I rush to her and throw my arms around her. "Oh, I've missed you so much!"

"I can't believe it!" Cassie gets out. She pulls back to look at me, "Daniel was being very cryptic, but he says you're still the same."

"There's differences..." I reply as I raise my hands to hold my daughter's face, "like I haven't seen you in eight years!"

Cassie throws her arms around me again and continues to sob. Daniel makes a quiet exit. We just hold each other a long time before we begin talking. I excitedly inquire about what she's been up to that I've missed. And when she finally asks, I gravely tell her what I've been doing lately. Then we just talk about boys. After a couple hours, Daniel pokes his head in, which causes us to abruptly change subject.

"Hey," Daniel softly says, "sorry, but visiting hours are up." We walk Cassie to the elevator where we part.

"Hey," Daniel places a hand on my shoulder as we head to the commissary.

"You arranged that?" I inquire.

"Sam helped me out a bit there."

I throw my arms gently around him, "thank you," I whisper, tears wet his jacket.

I feel awkward the rest of the way to the commissary. When we settle down to eat, Daniel finally brings up the topic, "so, did you and I keep in contact at all after the Aschen?"

I avoid eye contact, "well, you did send me Christmas Cards every year when you actually remembered Christmas." He gives me a confused look. "You spent a lot of time at various digs. You were in love with the Aschen's archeological technology. You were often off-world digging up histories and such. Since Sarah had died with the rest of the Goa'uld, you didn't have to work on getting her back. You had probably more freedom than any other Archeologist on Earth."

I still avoid looking at him.

"When I was finally jobless, thanks to the Aschen miracle medicine, I eventually came up with an idea about joining you on a trip to southern Africa that you had mentioned in a generic letter to me, Sam and friends. I thought that it would be nice to be a doctor to the remote villages out there, out of Aschen contact." I stab the fruit in my jello. "And I... really wanted to spend more time with you."

I look up at him when his hand had reached out and picked up mine, rubbing his thumb across my fingertips. "I can't believe I ignored you."

I blush slightly, "well, you didn't know. I didn't really want sympathy. But when we met up again at the anniversary, I think I may have jumped into that female make-them-guess-and-suffer-guilt-trip mode when I started a bit of a rant about how I didn't have a job."

He gives my hand a squeeze, "I think... you and me, working down in Africa together would have been really nice."

That makes me smile "I always thought so."

"General O'Neill," Jalen faces the SGC commander in a very respectful manner, "I would like to express my sincere gratitude for everything you have done for my people..." Jalen does a head bob and the voice that follows is a normal human voice, "our family," the host adds, "we have become quite close over the last few years in isolation and your help and generosity is very much appreciated, especially since we know that one or more of us must have seriously wronged you at some point and we are pleased you have looked past that."

General O'Neill nods in acceptance and Jalen sits down so he can start the meeting, "so, how are your people doing?"

"Tevel, Jakse, and Tusiel are settling in well with their new hosts." Jalen reports, "Tusiel has cure the disease afflicting Tanja and Tanja has asked me ask you if she and her brother could leave the base and say good-bye to her family."

"Alright, I'll try to arrange that, they can ask Carter what excuse she and her father used when he blended with Selmak," O'Neill responds offhandedly as he makes notes.

Jalen nods her acknowledgement as Rian, the other Tok'ra leader brings up a new topic "One of our information databases is damaged. We were wondering if we could convert the data to be compatible to transfer to your database. We could then wipe the old database, repair it, and have you copy our information back."

O'Neill scrunches up his eyebrows, "with that take up a lot of harddrive space or something?"

"I think it's doable, sir," Sam replies, "plus, sir, they are offering to let us keep all of the information they transfer." She raises her eyebrows really high, "A lot of it could be quite useful, they were a research outpost for the last few years, after all."

Jalen cocks an eyebrow and grins, "plus we can share information from our other databases as well."

"You'd do that?" O'Neill asks eagerly.

Jalen smiles at his childish excitement, "I don't see why not."

"Cool!"

O'Neill watches as the Tok'ra and Sam leave, chattering excitedly about the information they could share. I cross my arms and turn my attention to him. He takes a double-take before he realizes I'm staring at him.

"What?"

"So... Are you gonna let them stay?" The General goes silent. "Sir, I may not have much to offer, but I have seen a world where we found out who our allies were and enemies really were the hard way. I mean, your gut instinct about the Aschen was right, and if you're saying Tok'ra can never be trusted... but they're healing devices can be very handy in the infirmary while they are here and...I mean, Jalen..."

"She's alright." He says honestly but more to the wall then me. He silently leaves the room. I smile.

I've been working on getting an apartment and the government has been working on bringing me back from the dead. So while I wait, General O'Neill finally lets me step foot off base, but I still have limitations until I'm fully alive again. Daniel eventually takes me to a nice sit-down restaurant. I am surprised that I had forgotten how enjoyable it was to spend time with him, one on one. It was the best date I'd been on in many years! That evening we took a stroll in a park.

"Hey, Janet?" Daniel attempts to casually ask me, "if the Aschen turned out to not be evil or anything... do you think you'd prefer it there?"

"Are you kidding?" I respond without any thought, but I think before I continue, "granted, the safety, peace of mind, the world and galaxy wide peace and a united world was a nice place to dwell. But maybe I feel we didn't earn it, especially when I learned the truth," I focus on the sidewalk down which we are strolling, "but here, I have my friends back in my life, my daughter back, the chance to make my life have meaning again. I won't be useless anymore. I have another chance to try to find my place, and the chance to..." I don't know how to finish that thought.

Daniel stops and steps nearer to me. He's so much taller than me. He seems to know what I was trying to say though, "chance to...?" he leans closer to me, "to finally do this?" He gently lowers his head until his lips touch mine.

My entire body wants to explode in excitement and melt into a puddle at the same time.

He breaks off from me and hovers close to me.

I smile broadly. "On second thought, I think I've found my place."

He gazes down at me. "Me too."

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