Title: Love Hate
By: ExquisitelyInked
Summary: Touya is not supposed to love Syaoran when he is Sakura's boyfriend, but neither is Syaoran supposed to love his girlfriend's brother.
Rated: T
Disclaimer: I don't own Cardcaptor Sakura. CLAMP does.
Author's Note: I don't really like this story much. I didn't think my first foray into CCS would be a Touya/Syaoran (I was kind of hoping it'd be Touya/Yue, even though TouSya is my CCS OTP) but, whatever. Please review. First CCS fanfic.
Touya hates Syaoran. The brat with the fire in his eyes and his heart on his sleeve—there is nothing Touya hates more than Li Syaoran. He wants to protect Sakura from him, knowing Syaoran would definitely hurt her in the future, hurt her with no chance of recovery, but the immeasurable trust she puts in everyone prevents Touya from shielding her, and he resents that. They go on dates. Movies, shopping, sometimes obliging to Tomoyo's requests of cute—Touya snorts; cute—photographs of them together as a couple.
Touya despises the way Syaoran does not appreciate the true beauty of Sakura's nature—her unbreakable trust—because he is self-centered in his own little arrogant way, a way indefinable, because he might be the only one in the world arrogant enough to claim all the cards as his own, even when Sakura is getting them of her own accord and hard work.
Yet when Syaoran looks at him, with a scorching gaze long and hard, Touya finds himself melting, falling for him. Syaoran is playing around with him, because being with Sakura doesn't make him happy; it bores him out of his wits, and that is why Touya is now the victim. Syaoran could always make him feel like that; like he didn't have anything to hide behind, he was no longer the responsible university student, he was the same age as Syaoran, sixteen, the age where teenagers were most annoying ... and the most beautiful.
His eyes are large, round, long-lashed; almost feminine. Touya hates eyes like that; maybe it's because Syaoran's eyes are so similar to the description. His fingers are not long; Syaoran is not meant to be an artist or a pianist, and maybe Touya once—once, twice, a thousand times—imagined those fingers slipping somewhere dirty, somewhere unmentionable—
He gasps out loud and the room falls silent.
'Something the matter?' Syaoran asks Touya as he watches the latter's face go slowly red. The whole Kinomoto family is in the living room, where they are all watching TV with Syaoran slowly heating his gaze up at a clearly-uncomfortable Touya. 'I'm fine,' Touya snaps, and he storms up the stairs to his room. Fujitaka smiles softly, and says, 'I'm sure he'll come around from whatever bothered him.' Then as Syaoran gets up to leave Fujitaka offers to drop him, but then realizes he left his car at the office that evening. It is up to either Sakura to walk with him and then return; or use Touya's pizza delivery bike, because that's what he does a part-time job. They won't accept the option of Syaoran returning alone, because they are a family that just don't.
In the end Touya pushes past his sister, coming back down from his room, roughly volunteering to do the job. Syaoran's protests, I am a sixteen-year old, I can take care of myself are completely ignored by Touya as he makes Syaoran sit in front of him like a little child, and Syaoran is sure that is to degrade him in front of Mr. Kinomoto and Sakura.
In ten minutes they reach Syaoran's house. There are no lights on; Syaoran lives alone. Utterly lonely. The only way Syaoran keeps himself occupied, during sleepless nights, is by thoughts of Touya, because Sakura is nothing when compared to the sophistication, elegance, grace that Touya Kinomoto represents. Guilt gnaws away at the edges of his conscience but Syaoran, if faced with a choice of either of the Kinomoto siblings, would always choose Touya. Love is a fickle thing. Sakura loves Syaoran who loves Touya who doesn't love him. He doesn't even stop and consider the fact that he might be wrong.
The bike stops in front of the gates, shudders into silence. Syaoran makes to get off, but he can't unless Touya does. He turns his torso to ask him to do this one favor and suddenly Touya is kissing him, arms reaching to enclose him within Touya's warm embrace in the cold night, the absurdly chilly night in which Syaoran foolishly hasn't worn anything woolen, so of course he is eagerly leaning in. Touya loves winter. Touya loves Syaoran. Touya loves everything to do with Syaoran because he thinks he is suitable only for Syaoran. No one else.
Touya can't get enough. Syaoran is practically clinging to him, and both their dreams are getting fulfilled in this one moment in which they are as close as they can be with layers of clothes between their bodies and the bike seat beneath.
'I love you,' Syaoran manages to murmur softly to Touya, whose eyes widen. He knew this was coming. But then Syaoran wasn't dating Sakura as someone who really liked her ...
Sister? Syaoran?
Sister?
Syaoran.
'I love you too,' Touya kisses him again, and somehow Syaoran knows that somewhere in their vicinity tears are pouring down someone's face as they use the Fly to watch as their heart breaks all over again after a certain someone's best friend softly rejected them.
'Come inside, with me,' Syaoran says huskily in a low voice, eyes half-closed, and Touya just can't resist, kissing him again.
Please review. You would completely make my day worthwhile. Dec. 24 is my birthday, for heaven's sake. I'm posting this on my BIRTHDAY. Please review.