into
m o r n i n g
"What do you mean, something more valuable?"
"Hard to say. I'll know when I find it. What is it you want, Vaan? What are you looking for?"
"Me?"
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Tap. Tap. Tap.
Someone in the next room was pacing. He leaned against the floor, predicting the next step - Tap, tap, tap. Pause to turn, and... Tap, tap, tap going farther away, this time. They'd been doing it for the past hour, and it was beginning to really annoy him. It wouldn't have been so bad, except that whoever it was was wearing heels (which meant it was neither Basch nor Penelo) and the floors were all wood. He or she turned at the far wall and began back toward his.
What was he looking for?
Tap. Tap. Tap.
Reks used to always tell him that he was too impulsive, and that he'd get himself killed if he didn't start thinking before he did anything. He used to say that he'd have the rest of his life to be stupid and there was no need to be an idiot kid, too. Reks always thought too much, and didn't act enough. He'd spend so long trying to figure out what to do that the problem would just solve itself, or someone else would fix it.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
Maybe that was why he did it. Reks didn't like being given a lot of responsibility, said he'd screw everything up. He liked to just follow orders and do what he was told. He'd do it right, but he couldn't ever make his own decisions. Vaan always thought that Reks had no right to tell him that he reacted too fast when Reks never seemed to react at all.
Tap. Tap. Tap. Pause.
Reks believed in people, trusted them.
The person in the next room sighed heavily and slumped against the wall behind him.
What are you looking for? A way to achieve the impossible? Did he want to change the past, or just himself? Reks used to call him selfish because he believed in finding a way to get what he needed, no matter what. Reks tried to do without and scrape by with whatever he could, but Vaan could never make do with scraps. He needed something more than Rabanastre could have ever given him. Reks used to say that without him, Vaan would end up in prison because he stole the wrong thing from the wrong person. And he was right, really.
Was that Ashe? Was she crying, or just frustrated?
Reks always thought that things would work out for the better if you could just hold on long enough. Vaan always thought that nothing would happen unless you did it yourself, and that simply hanging on wasn't enough.
Ashe was crying in the room next to him. But Ashe never cried, right?
Why did Vaan have to be right? Why couldn't it be so easy as just not letting go? Why did Ashe have to see her husband's face, and why couldn't she accept the way things were? Why couldn't he? Why couldn't any of them? Was Reks really that far off the mark? Was his brother so wrong about everything?
There was a thud from the next room. Apparently, she had slammed her fist against the floor.
Reks believed in people. Vaan believed in himself. What was he looking for?
Tap. Tap. Tap. A door closed, and the footsteps passed his room.
Why couldn't he come up with an answer?
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(A/N: Blame the plot bunnies and bluelaguna for not being up so I couldn't waste the night making movies. I was watching the scene where Ashe gives Balthier her ring, and noticed the top bit at the end. Unanswered questions equals fun angst. So I bit. I'm sorry if it's a little difficult to follow. I tried to fix anything too confusing. And apparently I've got this thing going about fics not connecting at all with their titles. Oh well. I liked the look of "Into Morning." Sounds all hopeful and kinda tragic. Like it oughtta be on something better. Review if you like.)