Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia, 'cause if I did, whenever Spain showed up, "Sexy Back" would start playing :DDD
A/N: Fem!England and Fem!Austria
"I think we should just chop the whole thing off."
Sputtering and choking followed throughout the room, everyone surprised by England's statement. From her spot at the table, Austria sighed, placing her cup of tea on the coaster. Of course, England decided to act bonkers at her event, she just couldn't wait until it was her turn.
Austria glanced at the right, her nose turning up in habit. Prussia had a deranged look on his face, something that made him look even more uncouth than usual, something she hadn't thought possible. Eventually, the man seemed to calm himself and turn his attention back to what the Englishwoman had stated.
"You have to be kidding," Prussia began, looking at England as if she had grown another head. "You can't just chop off someone's manhood! That's the most unawesome and terrifying thing I've ever heard. No matter what Franny's done, he doesn't deserve to have his five meters taken away!"
"I believe the term is castration," Austria quipped mildly, ignoring Prussia's glare. "But, as loathe as I to admit it, I agree with Prussia. It does seem a bit... extreme given the circumstances to do such a thing. Why would you even want to do that, England?"
The blonde woman cleared her throat. "I just want the land that is rightfully mine."
"And that line just cements your role as the scorned lover, doesn't it?" Prussia yelled, infuriated.
A slow blush coated England's face, and she hurriedly looked towards the last member of the meeting, Russia. As creepy as Russia was, England was sure that he'd agree with her, especially since he was more ruthless than he was creepy. The previous war proved that much. Tapping her foot and placing her hands on her hips, the Briton gestured for the Russian to speak.
"If we cut it off, could I have it? Perhaps I could make soup out of it..." Russia trailed off, a spooky smile on his face. The three other nations shuddered, and quickly looked disgusted.
England sighed, slouching her shoulders in defeat. "Fine, we won't chop it off. We still have to do something though, there's no way I'm letting that bloody idiot keep all that land."
"Why, does it hurt too much when he fucks you?" Prussia leered.
Austria sighed again as England threw her cup of tea at the Prussian, forcing a squawk from the man, and began lecturing the man on how much of a asshole he was. As much as she wanted to join, Austria wanted to quell the headache she felt forming even more. Looking to Russia, she saw the man looking at the papers that Prussia had passed him earlier.
"You two, stop this idiotic behavior at once," Austria roared, standing up suddenly, Mariazell jiggling wildly. Almost immediately, England and Prussia were silent.
"We came here for business, and I believe we should deal with that, and act, accordingly. It's true that we can't leave France the way he is now, the world has become much too unpredictable, but petty squabbles will get us nowhere! We need to come up with a definite plan on how to stabilize Europe."
Austria sat back down and took a calming sip of her tea, trying not to let her glee show at England and Prussia's admonished faces. Russia was not even bothering to hide it, giggling and pointing at the two nations.
"It's easy enough to talk, Specs," Prussia growled at last, his red eyes narrowing. "But have you actually got a plan?"
"I would ask that you refer to me by my name, Prussia," Austria replied smoothly. "And of course I do."
It was England's turn to sigh and roll her eyes. She looked apologetically at Austria, and held out her cup to be filled. "If you had just said that..."
"You would still have ended up in a fight with Prussia."
England shrugged, glaring at the Germanic man. "Probably."
"Well, comrade, you are going to tell us your plan, да?" Russia called, leaning in excitedly. The Englishwoman too looked at the Austria expectantly, and Prussia's eyes brightened in enthusiasm. Austria straightened her dress, a bit back a small smirk at the others' eagerness. Everything was going according to plan.
"The countries whose land France had conquered are still around, correct?" Austria began, tapping the table with her fingers. "We simply must give those nations back their land and restore all of the monarchies to power. The only thing we need to do is make Europe like the French Revolution never happened."
Silence reigned in the room, each of the nations taking in what the Austrian said. Finally, Russia stood.
"Kolkolkolkolkol... you have such a refreshing way of thinking." The Russian laughed, pulling his coat closer to his body. "Now that it seems we're all done, I'm going to head back home. Ukraine is making Pelmeni for dinner. Farewell, comrades!"
Russia continued out the door, laughing all the way, and making the other three nations yet again shudder. After finishing her cup of tea, England too made to leave with an excuse about the long trip home, (which was just pitifully, they both knew that she was going to visit France) apologizing again about the cup of tea. This left only Prussia in the room with her.
Slowly, the Prussian too walked over to the door, his back turned to Austria. "You know, sometimes things will change, Specs. You can't always erase the past." With that, Prussia left, leaving the other Germanic nation alone.
Placing her cup down, Austria stared into the murky liquid. Sure, she couldn't erase the past from memory, the scars and nightmares proved that much, but couldn't the present be made to reflect the pleasant memories? Sighing again, Austria stood up, leaving the room barren off all life.
Perhaps that was just wishful thinking.
A/N: Okay, so this is, obviously, the Congress of Vienna. Hints of FrUk because my heart loves that pairing. This was just a little one shot since my AP is on Thursday, and I'm officially flipping out. Argh... stupid world, why do you have to be so old?
Please Review, and good night Starship Rangers!