okay, i have no knowledge of the law, the most i know is from law & order. yes, it sucks, but my kindle broke so i got bored and decided to write this.

disclaimer: naruto is not mine! ...yet.

Chapter 1

"Hi! My name's Haruno Sakura!" A pink haired woman in casual jeans and a button down shirt said brightly, beaming at the irritated professional pant-and-tie-suit guy with dark hair.

"Hn, Uchiha Sasuke." He said apathetically.

The woman continued to wave, but sweatdropped. Well, wasn't he charming.

She wouldn't even have to be here if that guy hadn't gotten her temper going. Damn Kiba, she was gonna kick his ass when she got released!

And damn Naruto, with his loud mouth.

And GAARA! BASTARD!

He had to go say something about her forehead, jerk.

So, when he called her forehead large, she pummeled him. Hard.

And he had the audacity to yell rape! RAPE?

SHE WOULDN'T TOUCH THAT PANDA-WHO-HAS-AIDS-THANKYOUVERYMUCH THAT WAY!

Ohmigosh, do they know who she is?

So he yelled rape, and this old lady (frickin blind as a bat, they really shouldn't be allowed outta the house, let me tell yahh) heard him yelling, and called the cops. So she was escorted calmly to the police station.

(Don't you dare buy into those scumbags sayin' she took out four police men before they got her handcuffed, it's all lies!)

And here she was.

Haruno Sakura.

Uchiha Sasuke.

Donuts.

"Why the hell are staring at me?" She asked from on her spot on the cold cold metal bed in her cell.

"Hn." He replied.

"WHATTHEFUCKDOESTHATMEAN?" She roared.

"Hn."

She gave that conversation up.

"When do I get my first call?"

"Now." He got up from his desk and unlocked her cell, then escorted her towards the phones.

Sakura dialed Ino's number, trying to ignore Sasuke's eyes on her back.

"Hello?"

"PIGWHERETHEHELLAREYOUUUUUUU!"

"Calm down forehead!" She was the only one allowed to call her that. "I'm on my way, and I've got all the money!" She said happily, and Sakura just knew, just knew, that she had ice cream. She was only that happy with ice cream.

"OHMIGAWSH YAY! I'm tired of this place already, all the cops are broody!" She whined. Ino laughed.

"Well, I'll be there in-"

The line was cut off.

o.O

She glared at Sasuke, and he smirked back.

"I wasn't done!" She seethed.

"Sorry, your time was up."

"I didn't get to tell her to pick me up mint chocolate ice cream!" He raised an eyebrow.

"Oh well."

And with that, she found herself back on her metal bed.

Day: 1 Hours: 1 1/2 Mood: Hopeless

She was never getting out! This was it, she'd be sentenced to 256 years in jail, and that wouldn't make sense because who could live that long? But they'd do it anyway!

Ino was never coming, she probably got sidetracked by gum on the ground, because Ino was a blond and ditsy like that.

"Sasukeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-kun, can I have a donut?" She asked sweetly. He glared at her.

"Do you see any?" He asked icily. Sakura blinked.

"No, but you're a cop..."

"Hn."

Guess that stereotype wasn't true.

Day: 1 Hours 2 Mood: BORED AS HELL

"What the hell are you doing?" Sasuke asked.

Sakura gave him a blank look.

"What do you think? I'm drawing tallies on the wall, like they do in movies. Show how much time I spent in here."

"Well, stop it, or you'll get more time for destruction of property."

Sakura sighed and muttered, "Hardass," under her breath.

"What am I allowed to do?"

"Nothing."

Well, hell.

Just then, they heard a loud crash, and a yell of, "DATTEBAYO!" And Sakura slapped her forehead.

"Naruto..." She groaned.

"SAKURA-CHAN, I'M HERE TO BUST YOU OUT!" He yelled as he slammed open the door.

Sasuke immediately jumped up and started throwing demands.

"Put your hands behind your head."

Naruto looked over, shocked, like he didn't see him.

But, knowing Naruto, he probably didn't.

"Whoa dude, calm down! I'm not really gonna bust her out! I've got the bail money with me!" Naruto said with his hands in the air in a sort of, "chill man, chill" kinda way.

"Hn, dobe." Sasuke said.

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TEME?" Naruto yelled in rage.

Sakura snorted and rolled her eyes, honestly, he started fights with everyone!

"NARUTO SHUT UP!" She roared.

Naruto snapped his mouth closed and cowered in fear. Sasuke smirked.

"Where's Ino?" Sakura asked.

"Oh, she called me and told me to come over, and I did, and she was like, 'Go get Sakura, blah blah, I heard the ice cream truck, blah blah blah,' and then something about gum on the floor?" He said while scratching the back of his head.

Stupid pig! She's officially on my, "Kick Ass" list! SHANAROOO!

"Okay, so hand Sasuke the money so I can get out of here!" She commanded.

"RIGHT!" He said and started patting his sides and rummaging through his pockets.

"Uhm...I don't know where it is!" He said in a panic. Sakura gave him the nastiest glare she could muster, and somewhere Itachi felt a chill deep in his bones.

"WHAT?" Naruto gulped and tried to hide behind Sasuke, who up until then had been watching the interaction with amusement.

"NARUTO YOU STUPID FAT BITCH! HOW COULD YOU HAVE LOST IT?" She screamed.

"I-I dunno!" He yelled in fear. Sasuke sighed.

"Dobe, did you ever look in your wallet?"

"Of course I did teme!" He said indignantly but pulled it out anyway.

Low and behold, the money was in there!

"Hn." Was all Sasuke said to the resent discovery, along with his patented smirk.

Sakura looked ready to strangle Naruto.

And Naruto looked like he had just took a dump when he had been constipated for a month.

"Give him the money." She said calmly.

"Here yah go, teme!" He shoved the money in his hands.

"COME ON SAKURA-CHAN, LET'S GO GET SOME RAMEN!" Naruto said enthusiastically. Sakura opened her mouth to agree just as enthusiastically but was cut off by Sasuke.

Honestly, did that boy know manners?

"Sakura, can I talk to you?" He asked.

"Uh sureeeee, Naruto go wait in the car I'll be right out."

Naruto looked between the two of them confusedly but nodded and left anyway.

They stood there in an awkward silence for a while.

"You wanted to talk to me...?" She said unsurely.

"Hn."

Sakura twitched.

"Well?"

"I would like to court you." Sasuke finally said.

Sakura blinked, then burst out laughing.

She laughed for a looooong time and Sasuke lost his temper.

"I don't see what's so funny." He snapped.

Sakura's laughter dissolved into giggles when she started wheezing out a sorry.

She finally stopped, clutching her sides and wiping a tear.

"I'm sorry, but courting?" She had to refrained from giggling again.

"Yes."

He sounded so serious.

"Well, Sasuke, I'll allow you to court me."

He looked relieved.

"But, when we go in public, it's called dating."

"Dating...?"

"Yes."

"Oh, okay..."

He looked so vulnerable, and so CUTE!

Sakura squealed and gave him a hug. Sasuke was shocked at first but slowly responded. Sakura breathed in his scent and opened her eyes slowly.

And saw a box of donuts sitting under his desk.

Her eyes narrowed and she hissed out, "Sasuke, what are those?"

They broke apart and he looked to where she was pointing.

"YOU BITCH, YOU LIED TO ME!"

Naruto looked towards the yell and found Sakura walking proudly from the police station munching on a donut with a full box in her hand and a brooding Sasuke with a nasty bruise on his face right behind her.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAAA! TEME WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?"