This is completely random and not my fault. Enjoy if you can. That is all.
Bzzzzzzt. Bzzzzzzt.
"What?"
"Did you get the fries yet?"
"Ruby, I just left five minutes ago. I haven't even gotten to the MacDonald's yet; can't you give it a break?"
"…Sam, the restaurant is three minutes from the motel, tops. What are you doing, playing Angry Birds on your iPhone again?"
"Cute, but no dice. Try sitting in traffic watching the light blink red off my windshield on for size. Have you watched the news lately?"
"Not an excuse fuck-up. I could have walked there and back in the time it's taken you to make it this far. Can't you just run a few red lights or cut someone off already?"
"…"
"Oh wait, I forgot you had morals. Never mind then, I guess I'll just go take a shower by myself, since you're too inept to make a five minute food run. Good riddance."
"Seriously? I'm out getting you a midnight snack and the only thing you're capable of doing is bitching me out just because you don't have anything better to do? I feel so loved."
"Bitch please, jackass. Now bring me my goddamn fries before I drop your laptop in the bathtub. You have exactly ten minutes before she gets it, and I am not joking."
"Well, fuck you very much woman."
"Nine and a half minutes. And you're welcome."
Beep.
Snarls. "Yeah, I love you too."
Still not my fault, but review anyway if you please. I've never actually posted anything Sam/Ruby related. Cheers!