Fun with Acid
As soon as John opened the door, he was hit by a stench that smelled suspiciously like burning hair. Even more suspicious was the wisp of smoke coming from the kitchen.
"Sherlock?"
"What? I'm kind of in the middle of something at the moment."
"Exactly what are you in the middle of that involves burning hair?"
"I'm not burning hair, I'm only-"
"Never mind, I don't want to know," said John, purposely not looking in the kitchen as he headed toward his bedroom, meaning to change out of his work clothes.
He emerged five minutes later. "Sherlock?"
"What now?"
"Have you seen my gray jumper?"
"It was lying on the couch this morning."
But, John saw, the couch was empty. Icy dread began to close in. "And… where is it… now?"
"I thought you didn't want to know what I was-"
"Sherlock!" John stomped into the kitchen to see his favorite jumper sizzling on the table, missing its left sleeve. As he watched in horror, the rest of it seemed to be slowly dissolving. "What did you do to it?"
"Well," explained Sherlock, "I simply poured some acid onto it to see how long it would take to dissolve the whole thing."
"You're buying me a new one."
"Why?" Sherlock raised an eyebrow. "You're the one who left it lying around."
"I shouldn't have to worry about my jumpers that I leave 'lying around' getting drowned in acid!"
"Well, you should have put it away, then."
"Yeah, like you ever put your things away!" He put his head in his hand. "And now I'll never get to put it away because it's completely dissolved."
Sherlock perked up. "Really? That took less time than I expected!" Grabbing a pen, he started scrawling down notes on a napkin.
With a big sigh, John stalked out of the kitchen. "I give up."
"Does this mean I don't have to-"
"You're still buying me a new jumper!"
"Fine," muttered Sherlock. It would go on Mycroft's bill anyway.