Disclaimer: I own nothing of Twilight but if I did, Leah Clearwater would have had a good ending. Please review if you enjoyed the beginning..
July 2009
"Leah!"
"Leah!"
My brother Seth's voice rose in decibel over the volume of my MP3 player attached to my bra strap under my clothes. I'd been listening to music while in the middle of painting my new living space a soft, creamy shade of yellow. From the way Seth was standing in my doorway, head cocked to the side and his eyebrows drawn together impatiently, he'd been calling my name for a good bit.
My hand holding the rollerbrush of paint left the wall, dangling downward over the paint tray. My free hand which was still spattered in paint, much like the rest of me and my clothes, reached up to yank the earbuds away from my ears. "What?" My voice rebounded slightly off the empty walls of my new place. The tinny sound of my rock music blared out to where we both could hear it.
The apartment wasn't large by any standards, just a simple art studio type space over the Cameron's double car garage. It had been home to Jared's great-grandma Lorraine Huatah up until four months ago when she had passed on to the spirit world. Now, for the cheapest rent I'd ever find on the small reservation of La Push, Washington, I'd be the one calling it home.
"Jacob called. He wanted me to remind you to be there tonight," Seth informed me in a voice that had a don't-kill-the-messenger type tone. He was already taking a step backward through the only door to the place.
I let out a soft huff of exasperated breath. My high and mighty Alpha had been giving me not-so-subtle reminders for the past two weeks that my presence would be required at tonight's little social gathering. The two wolf shape-shifter packs of the reservation would join together this evening around a large bonfire to eat, talk and re-tell the Quileute legends of our magic origins to the newest kid to phase, little Alex Warner.
Jacob knew how I felt about the bonfire gathering tonight. He also knew that I was likely to cry off from it with the excuse of setting up my new home. I was pretty damn certain from the fact he wasn't giving me his little reminder himself, that he knew I would have chewed his ear off about it had he shown up. But no, he had sent Seth, figuring my little brother to be safe from my fiery temper.
It wasn't that I minded hanging out with my packmates and friends. I loved eating, drinking and joking around with them, especially now that Rachel Black had been back from college the past few years. However, when it came time to sit down around the bonfire and listen to the old legends, I would always find myself feeling a familiar bitter resentment creep up on me. Whenever Billy or Old Quil would speak of our legends with pride, their words reflected the same gender over and over.
He. Him. Sons. Grandsons. Great-grandsons. Male Spirit Warriors.
I was the freak of nature; the genetic mystery. Of the entire history of Quileute legends, I, Leah Clearwater was the most legendary of them all; a female shapeshifter. Not once in our history (and I have researched every story in detail) does it ever mention any woman or girl taking the form of a wolf.
I could tell Seth was expecting some sort of answer to report back to our Alpha werewolf. I gave him a slightly annoyed look and retorted, "I'll be there." When he raised his dark black eyebrows at me in disbelief I found myself scowling and repeating, "I said I'll be there Seth so I'll be there!" The pique in my tone was obvious.
Any other packmate might have been agitated by my attitude but it rolled off Seth like water on a duck's back. He was just that good natured and that used to me. His eyebrow dropped and his dark black eyes lit up as he grinned at me. It was hard to stay upset with him when he looked so freaking happy-go-lucky all the time, and so I crinkled my nose at him which caused him to laugh.
Seth glanced around at the apartment asking, "How's it going? Do you need help?"
Three of the four walls had been painted over in my new color. I was working on the last wall, part of it already finished in my golden cream, the other part still covered in primer. Grandma Lorraine had been a fan of the color pink. Not just any pink either, she liked what the Camerons called "Pepto Bismal Pink".
"I got it," I told Seth with a shrug of my shoulders, "for now." I gestured to the empty room and said, "But I will need your help on Sunday with my furniture." I hadn't officially moved in yet because I was still renovating the room. I had a very specific idea in mind for my space. The Camerons were nice enough to let me paint and furnish to my tastes. The tiny, shower-stall only bathroom off the left corner of the room already had a coat of light ivory paint to help make the space look slightly bigger than it actually was. My knees could practically touch the sink vanity when I used the toilet.
The main floor of the apartment had an island cabinet bar separating the tiny kitchen sink and countertops. I was bringing in my own mini-fridge along with a microwave and hotplate for food. There wasn't a stove. Grandma Lorraine hadn't needed one. The main living space would serve as my bedroom and living area. I had already mapped out in my head where to put my bed and my two-seater loveseat in front of a tv. Yes the apartment was small, but it was mine.
I had worked really hard the past few years. I had earned my Associate's degree at the local community college and had transferred my credits to take online classes with a well known university. I was getting my degree in criminal studies. I worked part-time in the afternoon as a clerk at a gas station just outside of La Push heading towards Port Angeles. I also worked part-time running patrol shifts as a wolf, although the pay was really lousy, I once joked with Seth.
I had managed to do nearly everything I had told Jacob I was going to do back when I first joined his pack, except for one thing. It was the one thing I believe I truly wanted. But, no matter how many times I tried, I could never stop myself from phasing into a wolf. And it was not from a lack of trying.
I bent down to dip my rollerbrush in paint, scrubbing the excess carefully off into the tray before turning back to the wall I had been working on. From my peripheal vision I noticed Seth leaning casually against the doorjamb, his short, spiked-up hair brushing the top of the doorway. He had really grown up, passing me in height. He watched me work a moment before speaking as he lamented, "I can't believe you're finally moving out. Mom's talking about turning your room into an office, you know."
"Yeah right." Seth knew that I knew better than to believe that. Mom didn't want me to move out on my own and was worried I would become more of a recluse than she already viewed me as. "I think she's more worried you're going to turn it into a game room for you and your friends to always be eating her out of house and home."
Seth was getting ready to enter his senior year of high school and to my surprise, had managed to garner himself the unassigned title of Leader of the Pack to all the underage wolves who still attended school on the reservation. Colin Littlesea, Brady and Daniel Fuller, Matthew Hewes, Henry Ateara II, Tommy & Bobby Wilde, and Paul Longfree (PJ to those of us who didn't want to be confused by two Pauls) all looked up to and followed my younger brother because he was "cool" and "awesome" according to them. I don't think they realized that Sam and Jacob both, had assigned Seth the fun job of keeping an eye on them in school.
The Clearwater house had become a habitat for teenage boys. No, worse than that; they were rambunctious, teenage boys who could turn wolf at any moment. Was it any wonder I wanted to move out? I couldn't leave my room anymore without tripping over one of Seth's friends, not to mention all the missing food in the fridge.
"Oh don't worry," Seth told me with a dismissive wave. "I've got your spare key here for when we need a place to hang out away from Mom." I stuck my tongue out at him, knowing he was just teasing.
I smoothed out the paint over the primer, chatting absently with Seth while I did so. We had a variety of topics to choose from, but the fact that Alex Warner had phased was the hot topic amongst the wolves at the moment. The phasings had slowed down, only one or two boys per year, but they had not stopped completely like we had hoped when the majority of the Cullen clan left our area.
I'm not sure where most of them had gone, but I think Jacob had mentioned that Dr. Carlisle and Esme Cullen had headed up into Canada to live with some other vegeterian vampires that way. They still visited the area from time to time, checking on Bella, Edward and Renesmee Cullen. The tiny psychic and her battle-scarred husband were gone along with Jacob's arch nemesis "Blondie" and her hulk of a boyfriend. I'm not sure where they went, nor did I particularly care.
With only two vampires and one halfling in the vincinity, both wolf packs of La Push had thought our days of new shifters were over. The last of the phasings should have been two and a half years ago when the Cullens kept inviting their vampiric friends into our territory as witnesses, forcing our young ones into phasing. We didn't realize it then, how wrong our assumptions were about only vampires causing the phasing, until six months after the Volturi incident when Tommy Wilde had phased the first time. Not too long after that his younger brother Bobby phased.
We had another mystery on our hands. Why were the descendants still phasing? Who would turn next and when? Like myself, the solution to the mystery could not be found in any legends of our tribes, no matter how much the elders clung to the beliefs.
During the course of talking, I finished the last swipe of paint and stepped back to admire my handiwork. Seth approached my side and admired the color with me saying, "It looks good Leah, really good. The color suits you."
"Don't tell any of the other guys that," I muttered. Jared probably thought I would be painting his great-grandma's old apartment solid black or blood red, hanging upside down crosses and pinning voodoo dolls of Sam and other pack members to the wall with darts. I had not left Sam Uley's pack on the best of terms with anyone.
The younger wolves didn't have the same impression of me as the older wolves did. To them, I was just Leah, Seth's older sister, who sometimes yelled at them for devouring all the snacks and never leaving any for me. To the older wolves I was the bitch, the bitter ex, and just a damn nuisance as the only girl in their all boys club.
Speaking of the all boys club, I glanced at my watch which showed we had less than two hours to get ready and help my mother get all the food stuff to the site of the latest gathering. We'd have less time once I got all the paint stuff cleaned up, leaving the plastic cloths down on the carpet while the paint dried.
Seth helped me clear out the empty paint buckets, while I rinsed the majority of paint off my hands and out from under my fingernails in the kitchen sink. "Did you bring mom's car?" I asked him while scrubbing.
"Nope," He shook his head. "I came through the forest." I scrunched up my nose in distaste. We'd have to hoof it (or paw it) back to Mom's house. The paint in my fur was going to be interesting to say the very least.
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Seth and I were helping unload the food from my mother's Ford Escape when Jacob and Nessie showed up at the fire site in his VW Rabbit. Their presence, more specifically Nessie's, was going to cause a stir. Perhaps this night would be interesting after all.
"Jake! Nessie!" Seth bounded over to greet them. Jacob was twirling his keys around one finger as he shut the car door, smiling at my brother. Renesmee Cullen, his imprint who was physically about the age of thirteen by this time, hugged my brother wairmly.
I had to bite back a small growl at the gesture. Nessie was looking like her mother more and more every day. It still sat ill with me that Bella had accidentally broken my brother's arm a few years back. To this day, I still hadn't given her a proper ass kicking in return. It wasn't the halfling's fault she resembled the leech-lover that riled me so much, but I scowled a bit at her anyways.
"Hey Leah!" Jake finally noticed me as I was loaded down with a cooler full of slaws, potato salads and pasta salads made for that night's dinner. "Glad to see you didn't bail."
I grunted a noncomittal response followed by, "What and miss your version of The Legendary Wolfman? Not in a million. I can't wait to see you screw it up Black."
Tonight would be the first time that Jacob Black, Alpha of our small pack, would take over the telling of the legends of Kaheleha and Taha Aki. Normally the role of storyteller fell to the elders of the tribe, but Old Quil had determined a few bonfires ago that the alphas needed to be able to pass on the legends themselves. Sam had retold the story at the last bonfire welcoming PJ into his pack. Now it was Jacob's turn since Alex Warner had decided he wanted to join our pack instead of Sam's.
He was the first to join our pack in a long time. Sam's pack was extremely large compared to the five of us in the Black Pack as we called ourselves. Jacob, myself, Embry, Seth and Quil were content to be on our own. It made it easier when you had less people sharing your every thoughts and memories. But Sam's pack was getting full and so we'd been asked to make our pack open for membership. As a pack we had discussed it. Of the five, I had objected the most. I had grown comfortable with just 'my boys' as I thought of them.
Jacob didn't bother me too much. He kept his promise to never exert his Alpha authority over any of us. I got along with Jacob fine most days of the week because of that. We still could get on each other's nerves because both of us knew how to push each other's buttons, but we also had a mutual respect for each other due to our similarities and situations. We understood each other.
Seth was my little brother but even more than that he was my family. Some of the pack members think it's weird how I fuss over him, but I can't help my instincts. Ever since my mother first brought him home from the hospital when I was five, she would refer to him as "our baby" and ask me to help her with mothering him. I know now she did it to prevent sibling rivalry, but it's hard to switch off that protective nature I have for him.
Quil took some getting used to. He was a huge goofball and cracked jokes at the expense of others. His lame-ass jokes got worse and were his way of coping when situations were stressful, but it happened at some pretty inconvenient times to clash with my anger. It didn't help matters that he imprinted on my third cousin Claire and constantly worried over her being down at the Makah reservation without him. It was a long time before I didn't want to kick his ass over every little thing he did.
Embry was the hardest person for me to face when he joined our pack right after the Volturi left. I harbored alot of guilt towards Embry for the way I treated him when I was part of Sam's pack. It was wrong of me to take my anger at Sam and the pack out on Embry by calling into question his genetic line. We still don't know who his father was amongst the elders, but I didn't bring it up at all anymore. When Embry had joined, I had drawn him aside for a private apology. He had accepted it but my guilt had never lessened. Of all the wolves he was the quietest in our group and very good at keeping his thoughts to himself.
And then there was me, a woman thrown in to the He-Man-Woman-Hater's club. Is it any wonder I had to grow myself a set of brass ones? The only thing is, if you're a woman, it's called being a bitch. Luckily Jacob recognized within me someone strong willed who would call him out on his bullshit and gave me the position of Beta. I don't think I've ever let him down since obtaining the position.
My objections to adding more members had been overruled by my Alpha who felt we'd be a good influence to Alex. And speaking of Jacob, I held out the cooler of various cold salads to him saying, "Make yourself useful High and Mighty Alpha and take this to the tables."
The cooler was switched between the two of us and I could see Nessie's eyes riveting to Jacob's bent arms as he held it. Her cheeks were staining crimson and I couldn't help but roll my eyes. Apparently she finally was getting into boys. The teeny-bopper magazines I saw in Jacob's head last week on patrol should have warned me this phase was here.
"Also get a drool bib while you're at it," I cast my voice low enough that only Jacob heard me and he shot me a glare at my jibe. I gave him the most fake smile I could possibly manage saying a saccharinely sweet, "Thanks!"
Between the four of us, with Nessie's help, we got everything out of Mom's SUV and onto the tables. Billy Black was watching as Quil Sr., Sam and Jared were working on getting the bonfire started around all the log seating. Emily was helping my mother set up the food table, her waistline rounded out in her second trimester of her first pregnancy.
My relationship with Emily and Sam has never been good. How do you stay family with the people who broke your trust and ground your heart into a million pieces? There's only one answer. You don't. I only saw Sam and Emily at pack functions if I could help it. Time has eased the wound of their betrayal but forgiveness is still eons away.
More of the packs started to arrive. Embry and Quil pulled up honking the horn on Embry's truck. Embry and Jacob had worked in his garage for months to restore the truck. They had managed to rescucitate Billy's old beat up red truck that had once belonged to Bella before she married into money. Nobody knew how that truck had stood the test of time, but it had gained a third life when Embry took ownership of it.
Beyond the windshield I could see a third figure seated between the two. "Leah!" Claire, my young cousin and Quil's imprint clambered over him in her hurry to get out of the truck. She was six years old and would be starting first grade in the fall.
"Hey Claire-bear!" I scooped her up in my arms and then dipped her low to the ground. She giggled outrageously until I put her down. "Did you bring your bottomless tummy with you? We have alot of food to eat tonight."
Claire was giggling like mad as she said, "Yeah he's right there," pointing to Quil. It was our little routine to poke fun at him every so often.
"Ten bucks says he eats five plates," Embry added to our fun as he stepped out of the truck.
"Six," Seth said as he joined us. He took Claire from me, causing another round of giggles as he greeted her with raspberries to her neck.
"Seven," Claire piped in.
"You're on."
Neither Seth nor Embry won. Claire had set the standard, and Quil wanting to please his imprint to no end managed to stuff his gullet with seven plates of food so that she could win twenty dollars from the two losers. The indigestion alone was not worth twenty bucks in my opinion.
I sat next to Rachel Black during dinner, catching up with her. Unfortunately this meant I had to sit at the same table as Paul Lahote but he was more mellow than I had ever seen him in recent years. I was wondering about his mood until I chanced to see Rachel lifting a hot dog to her mouth and the flash of a small diamond on her left ring finger.
Well that was new. I was unable to resist teasing her at that point about being a cougar which earned me several glares from Paul who was a few years our junior. Rachel took it with good humor and pointed out the obvious. "It could be worse. He could be six years old."
"That's not a fair comparison Rachel. Mentally Claire's more mature than he is."
Paul stalked off to another table before the jibes got to be too much for him. I was slightly impressed. He really had learned some control on his temper issues. Lucky bastard.
It was dark by the time the food and drink had been inhaled by everyone. With all the wolves in attendance it was hard to believe any of the regular humans had managed to eat as well but we were all stuffed. As we seated ourselves on the logs around the bonfire, the talking slowly began to fade until the only thing making noise was Quil's stomach.
I found myself sitting on the ground instead of on the log. There were more wolves than seats so I was propped into a small space on the ground between Rachel and Embry's knees, my back to the log. Seth was sitting near my mom and the elders. Quil was sitting across the fire next to Claire and Alex. Jacob was sitting with Nessie, Sam and Emily.
I regarded Alex the newest wolf. He was tall for his age of twelve just an inch shy of my height and he was beefy like Quil. He had the same dark eyes, black hair and copper skin that dominated the Quileute. What I knew of him was that his parents ran the kayak rental shop on the reservation during the tourist season. I also knew that after the legends had been told tonight, he was going to choose Jacob as his alpha.
Jacob stood up at that moment and my eyes automatically drew to him. The light of the fire flickered across his face, casting it in shadows. Smoke was hanging a bit thicker in the air tonight, likely from the summer humidity. I found myself yawning just a bit, attributing it to the combination of inhaling paint fumes earlier and now the smoke from the bonfire.
We all knew the legends by heart but we all were listening as Jacob began to speak, his voice registering the same authority his father's had always commanded when telling the tale.
"The Quileutes have been a small people from the beginning-"
My eyes drifted from Jacob, to watch the burning embers of the fire. The flames were dancing along the wood, igniting the logs from within. The heat, combined with the gentle timbre of Jacob's voice and the smoke fumes were lulling me into an almost hypnotic state. My eyelids felt heavy and my breathing deepened.
He was talking of the spirit warriors, how all the men left their bodies behind, and the women were left behind. They were always left behind. There had never been a female spirit warrior. There had never been any female in the legends until the Third Wife made her sacrifice.
Jacob had memorized the stories well, but my attention was drifting as I kept my eyes on the fire. I felt like I was listening to him speak from far away in a long tunnel. As he began to tell the story of the rivalry between Taha Aki and Utlapa, I leaned towards the left, resting on a warm leg.
We all knew that Taha Aki returned to find his body missing and that many years after his body was stolen he made a pact with a great wolf for room inside the animal's body.
I felt a shiver run down my spine and I heard a whisper of a howl, far off in the distance. The sound was full of anger and sorrow.
Jacob went on to describe how Taha Aki tried in vain to get the attention of his spirit warriors using the wolf's body language to communicate with them. Only one warrior had sought out an explanation for the wolf's erratic behavior.
Listen.
"Taha Aki's anger was the anger of a man... the hatred was too much for the wolf's body, too human..Taha Aki transformed before his brothers."
Listen to me.
My eyes which had been drifting shut snapped open and I turned my head to look at Rachel sitting on my right. "What?" I whispered to her, not wanting to interrupt the story but wondering why she had spoken to me.
"What?" Rachel's gaze had been upon her brother and she looked down at me curiously.
"Did you just say something?" I whispered.
"No."
I blinked in confusion. Rachel turned back to listen to Jacob as he talked. I turned my head to stare at the fire again. I could have sworn she had spoken to me.
Jacob was still talking, unaware of anything transpiring between myself and his sister. He finished the first story of Taha Aki and the transformation of our legendary warrior into The Great Wolf.
Quil of course always had to comment on the fact our wolves reflected our spirits inside, this time targeting Brady's ashy wolf coat.
After a bit of teasing back and forth, Jacob commanded for silence again. It was time for the story of the third wife and her sacrifice.
Once more I found myself feeling as if I was hearing Jacob in a distant tunnel. I must have been more tired than I thought to be dozing so easily. It had been a long day.
My eyelids were drifting downward again, the husky tones of the story being told drifting into a soft humming sound. I closed my eyes for just a moment to rest them.
I jerked awake a moment later when a long, mourning howl sounded from directly behind me. It had startled me into wakefulness, but my eyes blinked blearily against the sudden intrusion of light.
I must have been asleep longer than I realized. The bonfire had banked itself into more of a campfire size. The logs we had been sitting on were empty and I came to realize I was completely alone in the circle. Where was everyone? How long had I been asleep?
I stood to my feet, feeling a rush of anger that no one had thought to wake me once Jacob had finished telling his story. Had Alex already been welcomed into the pack? I should have been awake for that!
Listen to me.
A shiver ran through my body as I heard the words Rachel whispered to me once again. What was that? I turned my head to peer into the shadowy forest beyond the fire's light. I tried to reach out with my wolf senses to figure out what was out there. I had a pretty decent nose and my eyesight had been enhanced since I first phased; but as I reached out to take hold of my extra perceptions, they failed me.
I willed myself not to panic but my mind was screaming without my permission. Where were my senses? What had happened to them? I took a deep breath attempting to gain my center and find that pool of warmth that I latched onto every time I phased into a wolf. I reached vainly inside of myself to find that inner fire, but it wasn't there.
No. You cannot phase here. Listen to me.
I swiveled my head left and right, seeking the source of the voice. "Who's there? Show yourself or I'll flatten you!" I growled out the words although with my source of inner strength gone, my voice lacked conviction behind it.
Within the darkness of the woods I saw a shadow move. It circled around me, just out of sight of the firelight. I turned as it did, keeping it in my sight. For just a moment there was a strange gleam of two eyes in the dark before they disappeared as it circled back to the beginning and stopped.
It stepped forward into the circle of logs and my breath caught in my throat. It was me, or rather my wolf. I had only ever seen myself through the eyes of my pack and seeing my wolf with my own human eyes had paralyzed me.
(To Be Cont.)
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