A/N: Summary is pretty self-explanatory. Because the beach time we got was nowhere near as good as it should have been.

The usual stands: Downton Abbey belongs to Julian Fellowes/Carnival/ITV.

Yellow Light

Part 1

It had been a feat for him to keep from smiling since that hour just after the break of dawn but weeks ago. Here, where there were really no confinements to speak or even think of, the smile he wore stretched nearly as far as the horizon that was before him.

As he looked out again John consciously inhaled, filling his lungs with that distinctive scent of sea air. He could almost taste the salt on his tongue. It seemed like an exaggeration, no doubt the mark of all men who had been condemned to see out their days in a hellish eternity with nothing but a blank void staring back at them. He had been one of the lucky ones, saved from such a fate. The light that had been trapped inside, hidden and hoarded behind his eyes, grew and grew until it could no longer be contained. At its height it might well have blinded him, and though it could have proved a fair bargain, he was gratified that he had been able to retain all of his remaining faculties.

He both watched and heard the foam upon the water's surface dance and crash, its power something to behold, the sound swirling in his ears. Everything really was so much sharper now, everything he experienced taking on a new force of meaning. His appreciation knew no bounds. The musk and endless stench replaced by the purity of all the world had to offer, an oppressively dark palette painted over with a spectrum of colour. He even relished the feeling of sand between each of his toes, tiny grains inching their way to every crevice and making him itch in a way that was only now mildly irritating. Wonders were ceaseless in this brand new existence.

She was the most precious wonder there would ever be.

When the curses of violence and yells of despair had not proved too much he had spent long hours sprawled against the unforgiving mattress in his box of a cell, attempting to fathom all the ways in which she was so unquestionably divine. He felt weighed down with regret on her behalf that he should have to bring her into this world where her perfection did not belong, even if she was kept sheltered in the safety of his thoughts. As it went, they were the only things keeping him sane. The beauty of her smile, the spark that never died in those sapphire eyes. The laugh that lifted his spirits after an especially taxing day when he had been subjected to one too many sideways glances. Her elegant fingers, those that surely belonged to a lady in disguise, weaving with the needle and thread as she worked; later, weaving in the spaces between his, the pad of his thumb soothing a tiny blister that had formed, the sign of unswerving duty. The breath of her sighs at the side of his head, all that he ever wanted to hear, the feel of the silk of her skin pressed to his. All too much for him to bear, and yet he was never able to think enough.

The end of October was not the time to make the most of being at the seaside. Yet Anna's enthusiasm had not dampened one bit, and in turn neither had his. Since they had decided upon the destination for their four days spent away, an extremely kind gesture by Lord and Lady Grantham meant for the reunited couple to truly enjoy his return, she had not stopped chattering about how thrilling it would be to be at the beach. To his surprise she told him that she had not visited since she was a small child, when her family had departed from the tiring occupations of the farm for a rare holiday. Keenly watching the excitement grow in her gaze, John determined that he would do everything he could to make the trip memorable for her. No doubt she would have swatted him upon the arm and told him that any day she spent in his company, unreserved to her as it now was, was more marvellous than she could ever dream. Feeling her small hand wrap around the sleeve of his jacket, as daring a touch as they could endeavour even when nobody else was present in the servants' hall, he began to wonder how different the sands of Scarborough would be to those in Fanore or Liscannor Bay.

As it turned out, they were not that dissimilar. The inn that they were lodging at sat not too far away from the edge of the shore, meaning that they could be out on the beach not too long after the sun's rise. John used his best powers of persuasion to keep them between the sheets that little bit longer and he prized Anna's relenting smile before she snuggled even closer for a kiss, the number of which he had lost count of even before it deepened considerably, her hands possessive as they snaked around the back of his neck.

With more energy than him, his wife could have stayed upon the sands all day and he would have happily regarded her in her pursuits. Anna was eager to explore every inch from one side of the pier to the other. He couldn't help but think that she looked exactly like a nymph as she twirled and skipped, her skirts held in her hands, a creamy flash of bare ankles glimpsed whilst she kicked the sand playfully. Her infectious giggles were only momentarily interrupted by a yelp or two as the sea lapped unexpectedly at her feet. She was so full of joy, John had never seen her spirits soar quite so high – save for the moment they had been pronounced Mr and Mrs Bates – and that he could be responsible for such a beautiful change in her filled him with more pride than he had in any of his life's achievements.

She had been showing another different side to herself too, one that he had been made pleasantly aware of during his imprisonment with her talk of buying garters and the fluttering of her long eyelashes towards him when the guard had not patrolled so closely, the fire of desire in her eyes burning unmistakably while his own blood heated distinctly the longer he gazed upon her. His wife in name, and but for one night that he had held dear, in body. In some of her letters she had dared to make some rather risqué hints about how they could 'get to know one another properly' once he was free and they were living in their own home, without any restrictions upon them. A dream that had been eternal for both.

He recalled the other evening when she had scampered off in front of him, going down towards the water's edge as the sun was lowering in the sky. Anna was always conscious of getting too far ahead and she slowed her steps when he reached his arms towards her, wrapping her in his embrace to cover her face in kisses. She wriggled in his grasp, claiming that she was ticklish and that the combined efforts of his hands and his lips did not help matters. She pulled his head down closer when he asked whether he should stop. The wind started to whip around them, nearly taking her hat clean from her head. He made the suggestion that it was ideal weather for flying a kite. His eyes widened and his cheeks coloured a little when he heard the one she put forward. Swimming in the sea by moonlight wouldn't prove that scandalous, if rather bracing, but then he remembered that neither of them had brought along bathing costumes. The smirk on her face was the most delicious thing he'd ever laid his eyes upon, and yet he stroked her cheek with the softest touch he could muster.

He simply could not put into words how much he loved her and how he eagerly awaited the life they would build together with every beat of his heart.

The splitting of the clouds had brought their afternoon stroll along the beach to an abrupt end, though as she looked longingly out of the window from their room John could tell Anna was hopeful that the rain would halt long enough so they would be able to go out and watch the sun set over the sea. In a swift movement that he almost didn't have the time to comprehend she brought her hat down. John smiled as he saw the small tufts of hair stick out at either side of her head, in stark contrast to the gold smoothness of the rest, not immune from the sprays of water that had come from the sky and the earth beneath their feet too.

She let out a sigh as she turned, looking down upon the suitcase that was lying open on top of the bed.

"I can't believe it's our last night already," she uttered in a whisper that was worlds away from the cheerful exclamations she had made all over the weekend.

John caught her hand as it travelled down the slightly bobbled bedsheet, bringing forth a smile that he would never tire of beholding. He gave a gentle squeeze before he quickly lifted the case, settling it down at the foot.

"Let's forget about that for now," he pleaded. "Lie down with me, love."

His arm remained circled around her waist as their backs braced the mattress simultaneously, Anna instinctively nestling closer to his side and bringing up both of her arms to fit against him. John's eyes went from contemplating the ceiling to dropping down to notice once more how her feet only made it to his calves. The sight never failed to make him smile. As much as he had wished to be part of the world again, feeling the life rushing through his veins as he found himself amongst the fields and felt the hard cobbles beneath his feet once more, he loved it best when it was just the two of them occupying the perfect world of their own making. Nothing compared to the softness of his Anna, the exhilaration he experienced when he held her in his arms though she had been made specifically for that purpose. Yet he knew she was so much more, more that he couldn't even begin to imagine but which he would dedicate himself to discovering.

She shifted a little in his arms and he adjusted his hold, cradling her like she was the most precious thing in the world. His unbelievably beautiful warrior. Her eyes were closed and she snuffled contentedly when he placed delicate kisses over the lids.

"We've done a lot of walking today."

"Is your leg okay?"

"Perfectly. I think it did it some good. Remind me of that when I start complaining later."

A veil of worry floated over her face but she was quickly placated by the raise of his eyebrows, and the hand that began to stroke its way down her side.

"You've caught the sun," he noted, dotting his fingertips at her cheeks, his slightest touch causing her to respond with a shudder of her shoulders.

"Hardly. It's been grey for most of the day."

"It's deceptive. You have." He ran a finger over a little patch of peeling skin, not that it spoiled her flawlessness. "I don't have such luck, given my mother's gift of her fine Irish complexion."

"God doesn't need to alter what's already perfect."

John rolled his eyes at her praise before he started to move insistently from side to side, bumping against one of her hipbones.

"Blasted sand gets everywhere."

Giggles erupted from her lips, a delicate hand landing upon his chest.

"It'll make for a nice memory when we get back," she replied sweetly, and he couldn't stop his mind from wandering.

Half of him didn't want to ever leave this room or indeed this bed, collected images of Anna and him and their lips crashing and hands caressing and limbs tangling taking over everything. In between heated kisses and whispered exchanges, they talked for what seemed like hours about the days to come as well as the nights. Anna spoke of giving their newly acquired cottage a real spruce-up while he hung upon her every word, stroking back the hair that had tangled upon her forehead with one hand and holding the other in hers all the while. A ridiculous part of him feared that if he let go she would disappear like a dream snatched from him as the morning broke. She noticed the concern he couldn't hide in his look, tuning into him instantly. The sheets slipped, leaving her gloriously bare before him, wearing only a soft smile. Before he could think another terrible and untrue thought her lips were lingering upon his, leading him willingly into a kiss that somehow managed to be ten times more sensuous than the last they had shared. Life was a dream that had come true for him and it would remain so no matter where they found themselves. He promised her a garden full of all the flowers she could possibly pick as his hand moved lazily over her stomach. Perhaps in time they'd even have a vegetable patch too.

It surely wasn't possible but he believed he could live off her love alone.

"We need to go out and have some dinner," her head rested in the crook of his neck. "I need to feed you up, still."

He frowned a little, though he couldn't hide the smirk pulling at his lips. "I thought you would like the slimmer figure I was cutting."

"Mr Bates," as much as he adored it when she addressed him by his Christian name he still went weak when he heard her utter his full title in such a manner. "I happen to think that the more of you there is, the better."

He had to chuckle, suppressing his baser urges to roll over and replace her clothing with kisses teemed over her body, though he didn't suspect that she would complain if he took his chances. With no fear of being silenced and possessing a freer state of mind since his release, he took the opportunity to tell her the thoughts he had been keeping while he held her close in the aftermath when she was still catching her breath. John's pulse quickened to see Anna flush as he confessed his racy words, at first worried that she might be embarrassed but being spurred on by the rapid dilation of her pupils and the warmth of her body underneath his palms.

She asked him if he would dress her in the mornings and he happily obliged, taking great pride in the job, stopping every now and then to cup her face in her hands and kiss her softly. He made sure that he didn't lace her corset too tightly, she saying that it felt too strange to be without one even when they weren't in uniform. He smiled and felt his heart flutter when she took his hand, placing it over her own.

"I love you, Mrs Bates."

The words always held such a great depth of emotion for him, and he couldn't fight it even now, just after he had kissed her again.

She shook her head, gazing at him lovingly.

"And I love you, Mr Bates." She placed a peck on his cheek. "My husband." Another on the other after her hand had stroked a path there. "John."

Anna revelled in the wide smile upon his face before she parted his lips with her own. The kiss was slow, sweet, everlasting. Enough time passed by that the rain shower came to a conclusion outside, the darkening yellow light of the sun peeking through the clouds to tell the world that the day wasn't quite over yet.

John was too entranced by the arch of his wife's back as she stood up, the curve of her behind jutting briefly in the air before her body straightened again. The weight of so many months that she had carried upon her shoulders had ebbed firmly away and she was only left with complete serenity, a renewed flame in her eyes and a smile that wouldn't leave her. A smile that tempted him to the point of surrender as much as it made his heart sing with the purest love he had ever known.

"You're right," she writhed a little where she stood, a towel held in her dainty hands and slipping between her fingers, "the sand does get everywhere. It's not entirely comfortable, given that we have to go out again."

The notion brought a light to his whole being, and he suppressed a laugh on hearing her apparent surprise as he snatched the towel from her grasp, sending it flying across the room.

"Well, Mrs Bates," he growled, causing her giggles to come forth, "I believe I have a way to remedy that."

He was on his feet before she could say any more, surprised by his own agility. Anna started to take slow steps backwards towards the bathroom, and he smiled at how close their minds were in synchronisation.

"Shall I heat the water up, Mr Bates?"

Something told him that it wouldn't take much.