They say time heals all wounds. I know it does not. Because I've been waiting for it to heal mine since the day you walked out my door.
Here is poem 5076.
I want to forget
Just let it all go
No more of this reality
Because it gives me such pain
This rendering pain is an unmerciful rain
A rain of what I want and what can't be
Because you've been gone so long
And just when I think you're home
It's not you
Everyone tells me that I need to move on
I wish I could
But even if I tried my hardest
It'd only be you I'd be thinking of
Because it always has been you
Each and every day
Because I've been waiting for you to come home
Since the second you left
I know everyone says you'll never come
That I'll never see you again
That my long lived hope should die
Like they think you have
But I know you're alive I'd know it if you were dead I'd feel it, I know
You're just not ready to come home yet
Just like you weren't ready to stay
That day that you left
So many years ago
It feels like forever
And it has been
I know I can't last much longer
Waiting like this
Because every day I wake up and it's the same thing
Disappointment and too many tears that were unmerited
But I miss you
Every second you stay away
I miss having you around me
I miss every little detail
Because I knew them all
I still know them
I go through them as I wait, sitting in your favorite chair
Wearing your favorite shirt
Watching the door that you hated
As I cry over the rest of the thing you left me
I'm starting to lose hope
You can't truly stay away this long
Unless you never wanted me
Like I thought you did
I guess I'll learn to live and see
This is the five thousandth and seventy-sixth poem I've written you
Since you leftI send them every day to where you said you'd be
I always get them with a return to sender stamp the next day
And I've stopped hoping you'll get these
It's more that I still wish you'd come home
Even though you won't
Because you've got another life
One without me -
An ex-wife and kids
Who you left for me
I guess you just wanted them back
I just wasn't enough
Because I'm a man
And we can't have or adopt
But I still love you
No matter how long you've been gone
Or why you left
Because it's ingrained in me
And it's something I'll never shed
I think there's someone at the door, probably the postman so I'll end this here. I love you Severus. Very much.
Yours Eternally,
HJP