1Wash Away the Scars
I couldn't get rid of it. The feeling that haunted me ever since he left. That weird, empty void that was made inside of me, waiting for something–someone–to fill it back up.
My sapphire blue eyes stared aimlessly at the ceiling as I lay in my bed, my hands tucked behind my head and fingering with the ends of the ribbons of my headband, which set beside my shoulder.
Nothing could tear away the memory of when I was young, when I always wished that someday I would be able to obtain the mark of a ninja. Now all that mark does is remind me that Sasuke's loyalty to Konohagakure is broken apart by a slash. I know that he's never coming back; I know that I should hate him for all he's done to my village and my friends. Yet I can't help but wonder if maybe inside of all that evil lies that same stubborn boy that I befriended all those years ago.
I shook my head.
He was gone; it was like he had disappeared from the face of the Earth. The guards at the gates had not seen heads or tails of him for nearly a year. I was beginning to become aware of the fact that he could possibly be dead. I knew Suigetsu, Karin, and Juugo had disbanded Team Hebi a few months ago; the information was leaked from a passerby who had happened to be picking herbs when they all had went their separate ways.
Perhaps he was in hiding, stalking in the shadows until the last minute when he would be able to attack Konoha once more. I am sure that Sasuke has become stronger; no matter how much power he has, there is always some way he manages to gain some form of new jutsu or special seal, despite the limitations of his chakra nature.
I really do sometimes wish that I could just forget about him. Leave Sasuke out of my mind and move on to more important things, like my real life and missions that I need to complete. But pushing aside how hard I try, nothing works to move the raven haired man from my thoughts and actions. I try not to speak, because everything I say is somehow linked to him. I try not to think too much, otherwise I will end up envisioning him. I do not talk to people who resemble him or have interacted with him, save for Sakura and Kakashi. It would be too dangerous to let my comrades know that I have not given up hope that Sasuke will come home.
'Tap, tap'
My heart pace quickened, my head turning as I heard a slight tap on the window near my bed. My blue eyes shifted to the glass pane, which was covered by curtains. Slowly, I moved my position and stood up, shuffling over to the window and pulling back the red colored fabric. I scanned the area outside. Nothing in sight except for a few late night civilians that quietly walked through the streets.
I pulled the curtains back in place, my hand shaking. A crystal tear slipped down my cheek as I struggled to keep silent. I had been hoping, wishing, dreaming, that maybe that the one at the window would have been my old friend.
I was delusional; if Sasuke had come back at all, it would have been to get revenge. No matter how much I prayed to the heavens that the crimson eyed man would return, he wouldn't. More tears poured down my face as I uttered a quiet whimper.
I knew that something was wrong with me; no one in their right mind who knew about the deadly killer, Sasuke Uchiha, would ever want him to invade their home village. But I really couldn't help it. Despite the odd circumstances, I felt slight guilt for not trying to stop him from leaving Konoha so long ago, when he went to join Orochimaru. If I had stepped in and intervened with Sakura, then maybe I could have convinced him to stay! God, this is all my fault! If I had just stopped him from going to that snake man, everything would be okay!
I bit my lip to stop myself from letting out a sob as I sat back down on my bed, holding my face in my hands as wet, salty tears stained my skin.
I had to stop this...I was breaking down. I pulled back my head and looked out another window which was next to the door. In the distance, I could see the training field.
'Yeah...maybe training would help get my mind off of things...' I thought, my hand curling into a fist. I stood up once again and pulled on my ninja clothing, grabbing some kunai, shuriken, and a few paper bombs before I headed out into the night.
Stars shined over my head as I jumped silently from roof to roof, my feet pushing off quietly and sending me flying into the night sky. A slight breeze pushed back my shaggy blond hair, my eyes blazing with determination to do the best I could at training until the sun rose above the Hokage Faces carved into the side of the mountain.
It wasn't long until I had reached the field filled with dummies and abandoned weapons which were stuck in the sides of trees and different logs that littered the area. The darkened grass whistled softly as it blew in the midnight wind. I looked around, wondering where I should start. My eyes stopped at a target pinned to a dead log, which was pushed upright to a vertical position. Perfect; I needed to work on my weapon aiming, anyways.
I put myself in a few yards in front of the log, pulling out an array of kunai from my weapons pouch. I aimed for a few seconds, then sent a kunai sweeping through the air and into the target board. But I didn't make the target; only a little more aim to the right...
'whshhhh'
I shot out another kunai, this time only narrowly missing the red circle which had been avoiding me for so long. Another. Then another. Every single time, I missed the target, but only by a little bit. My breathing had started to become harsher, and a bead of sweat rolled down my cheek.
I switched between exercises, starting with weapon aiming and then moving onto fake sparring with a few of the chakra dummies that automatically spewed out attacks when I got too close. Then was centering my positive chakra, and next was climbing trees. I remember how when I was younger that tree climbing was one of the hardest activities for me. I never did get to beat Sasuke's record of walking up the tallest tree in the training grounds. I smiled to myself as I now stood at the top of that same tree, looking over the fresh night fall that had covered the Land of Fire in a blanket of shadows. A slight trail of blood ran down my forehead, where a deep cut lay, outlined with a bluish black bruise. I had gotten it when I accidentally thrown a kunai at a metal target, meant for chakra attacks, and it had deflected and slit my forehead.
I ignored the stinging wound and sat at the top of the tree, my ocean eyes still a bit damp from crying. I rubbed them on my sleeve and watched as a leaf fell from a nearby tree and onto the ground below.
The Hidden Leaf Village...home of the Hokage. I promised to Sakura that I would eventually bring Sasuke back...I just don't know if I can keep that promise anymore.
I ran my fingers through my short hair and continued to stare at the horizon, which was dotted with darkened houses and shops, the occasional lighted window gleaming brightly and sending rays of light onto the space surrounding it. I smiled.
Sometimes I forgot what being a ninja was all about; to help those in need and to keep this land as peaceful as it always is. If I were to loose that same peace...I'm sure that I would die of heartbreak.
I shook my head, trying to clear my thoughts as I jumped down from branch to branch, getting closer to the ground. One branch was particularly thin, though, and I almost broke it, if it weren't for the fact that I hopped onto another one just in time. Finally, I got to the surface of the Earth and sighed in relief. Sometimes tree climbing can be dangerous, even if it looks easy.
I walked over and sat down on a slightly moldy log with many holes in it, looking very old. I leaned my head on my hand as I thought silently about what would happen if I were to run away from Konoha.
Nothing bad would come of it; I mean, I'm just a threat to the people around me since everyone wants to get their hands on the nine-tailed jinchuuriki, right? If an enemy were to attack the village searching for me, then innocent citizens might be killed for no reason except me. And it would be my responsibility.
So there is no real fault in running away, is there? Sakura can do well enough on her own, I know that. And Sai is fine with his social skills, if not a little bit awkward at times. Kakashi probably won't miss me that much, and Iruka's got other genins to worry about. No one would worry about where I went. Maybe I could lie and say that I was going on a very long mission.
I blinked when I felt a wet sensation tumbling down my fingers. I glanced down in the darkness and saw a thick red liquid trickling around the base of my palm. Oh shit, my cut...I didn't bring any medical supplies with me. I had to get back to the village.
I used my hand to push myself up and off of the log, my stance a bit unbalanced since I had lost some blood. I blinked fast as a droplet of blood ran over my eyelid. I had to leave. Quick.
I got into position to speed to the hospital, about to push off my foot and jump, but I found that I couldn't.
I tried again, but felt a pressure around my waist. I looked down and saw two strong hands firmly grasping around me, hugging onto my jacket.
"Naruto..."
Shivers went up my spine as I heard a rather familiar voice hiss beside my ear. I bit my lip as the fingers around my waist tightened their grip and dug into my skin.
"S-Sas-suke?" I whispered. I had never been more afraid in my life than I had been at that moment, not knowing exactly who was behind me while my hands instinctively reached to my weapons pouch.
I yelped as a freezing cold touch ceased my movement.
"Don't fight against me, Naruto...you know you can't win..." Sasuke's voice was in front of me now, and I snapped open my eyes which I didn't realize I had closed.
Scarlet red orbs with spinning midnight marks stared eerily back at me. Raven black locks fell into his face as the wind blew, sending the dark strands astray.
"W-What...what..are you doing here...?" I asked quietly, my arm still frozen in its place to reach for a kunai if needed. Sasuke's eyes burned into mine, his arms folded across his chest.
"I'm here because I need to be," He replied darkly, and I almost flinched at the negative aura that surrounded him. I felt goosebumps start to crawl across my skin as he approached me.
I shut my eyes closed as he started reaching towards me, his hand outstretched. I tried to brace myself for the attack that I was sure would come.
It never did.
All that I felt was a cooling sensation on my forehead, sending refreshing bursts of power through my body. I risked opening an eye, and when I did, a gasp escaped my mouth. A piece of cream colored linen dangled over my face as I felt pressure applied to my forehead. I opened the other eye as I could feel the blood from my wound being soaked up and into the thick fabric.
"W-what are you doing?" I asked weakly, my voice cracking in fear, scared of the fact that he could be injecting some kind of poison into my system.
"I'm wrapping your cut...dobe."
I blinked. "Why...?" I questioned.
"Because you were about to lose too much blood. Now hold still, idiot," Sasuke replied smoothly, his arm circling around my head as he covered my wound entirely. I looked down as he wiped the blood off of my hand with the rest of the linen, efficiently cleaning all of the metallic liquid from the outside of my body.
Once he was done, Sasuke backed away and gave me an odd expression. I couldn't read the emotion that laid behind those crimson eyes of his.
"Don't expect me to be staying, dobe. I came because I heard you training..." Sasuke said, turning around and starting to walk into the forest. I frowned.
"Wait! Don't go," I said, running to catch up with my former friend. The Uchiha turned his head and looked at me.
"What do you want?" He asked rudely.
"Where are you going? Aren't you coming back to Konoha?" I questioned worriedly, hoping to whatever deity in the sky that he wasn't leaving for good. Sasuke gave me a dark look.
"No. I'm going," He answered simply, continuing on his way to whatever destination he was headed to.
"Where?" I asked again as I positioned myself in front of the annoyed looking man.
"Wherever I end up," He said.
I sighed. After all this...he's leaving? After I've waited for him day and night and worried about whether or not he was dead? He's leaving!
"But...you'll come back?"
"Maybe...but you'll see me around...dobe..."
And with that said, I watched as my longest friend vanished into the shadows of the forest. Despite myself, I couldn't help but smile.