DISCLAIMER: I do not own Home Alone, all rights are owned by 20th Century Fox and its affliates. The only character I own is Kevin's (much more intelligent) sister Kelly Anne and her relations to the other characters.
This story is dedicated to anyone whose ever been lost in a foriegn country, or anyone who enjoys either film.
Don't forget to review after reading.
THE TROUBLE WITH KEVIN
BY Galindagirl13 writing as Kelly Anne McCallister, Kevin's twenty year old sister
My brother Kevin had always been a bit of a loser, you only have to ask my brother Buzz (Yeah, weird name, I know) and he'll tell you what he's like. Still, somehow he managed to get on the wrong plane instead of being left behind like he was the year before and ended up in N.Y. My hometown. Since I'm ten years older than Kevin, I got to get away from the family, which I kind of enjoyed cos they all drove me insane, and I work in N.Y really close to the swanky Plaza Hotel.
I walk past the Plaza almost everyday, looking at all the posh people going in and out, often being snubbed by Mr Hector, the posh if slightly snobbish typically English Concierge himself for daring to wear something which isn't designer outside his hotel! At least, that's what it seems like. Otherwise he must just think of me as a peasant, since most of his clientele can afford to be delivered to conferences etc in stretch limos instead of public taxis! He isn't the owner though, he's just a kind of manager, or head of the hotel staff, yet he seems to think of the Plaza as his hotel, like some horrible snob!
It's not my fault. Although I have a good job, it doesn't mean I can blow my wages out on expensive designer clothes, but I do take a delight in visiting Fifth Avenue around the holiday season. I have a very nice apartment just big enough for me and I don't share with anyone so there's no arguments over who pays the rent or whatever. It's a simple life, just away from the family, and I prefer it that way.
I never imagined that my brother would end up staying at the Plaza for a couple of days, though. Basically, he committed credit card fraud so he could stay there, and Mr Hector was dumb enough to fall for it. All I knew, was that last Christmas, Mom and Dad rushed off to Paris and left Kevin behind. Luckily they got home for Christmas but goodness knows what Kevin got up to whilst they were away. I mean, for all we know he could have been a victim of attempted burglary and nearly been caught by two burglars. I mean, who knows? Kevin just said that he 'hung around' but I know my little brother....
Anyway, it was about two days before Christmas and Mom did her normal catalogue of calls to all the family, including me. She told me that they were going to Florida, and how Kevin was driving her mad saying that he wanted to stay somewhere with a Christmas tree. I mean, come on.
Still, as far as I know, something happened at the Christmas Pageant and Kevin got into a lot of trouble for it. He had to sleep on the third floor with our cousin Fuller who wets the bed all the time. Whenever I'm at home, I share my sister Lennie's room.
I was at work when I first saw Kevin in NY. Because I work in an office tower block with a great view of the street below, he was easy to spot.
At first I couldn't believe it was him, he was meant to be in Florida, and I was sure Mom would have double and triple checked to make sure he was there after making the same mistake last year. Still, I was tired, so I dismissed it from my mind. In my lunch hour I went for a stroll in Central Park, passing the weird bird lady with the pigeons flapping around her, and eating my lunch on a bench opposite the Plaza. I saw a boy who looked like Kevin go in, after all, not many kids wander around with a great big brown rucksack and bobble hat on their head. I didn't call out encase it wasn't him, and I didn't want to embarrass myself. I waited a little while then entered the Plaza, standing in the corner of the lobby, watching the little kid who looked like Kevin walk straight up to the counter and start gabbling all this stuff. The lady behind the counter didn't seem at all convinced. She reminded me of my eleventh grade teacher, who never smiled and came out with all these nasty sarcastic comments. Mr Hector noticed the new arrival and with a brisk 'call you back, Henri' he slammed the phone down.
The idiot bellboy Cedric came waddling across the lobby attempting to balance two large suitcases on his hands, rather unsuccessfully.
"Cedric," Hissed Mr Hector, "take hold of the handles and lift them." He shook his head.
"Oh, right. Sorry." Cedric apologised and put the cases down on a trolley. Then he reached into his pocket and pulled out a fan of tips.
"Cedric," Groaned Mr Hector, "don't count your tips in public. Oh, and find out everything you can about that…young fellow." He indicated the kid, who turned around. It was Kevin! But what the Hell was he doing in New York City?
"Front please!" Ordered the lady behind the counter. Cedric scuttled over and took Kevin's bag from him, leading him toward the elevator. Mr Hector narrowed his eyes at Kevin and frowned, I was sure that he didn't believe a word of Kevin's story, whatever he'd said. I waited a little longer for some guests to talk to Mr Hector and then joined the queue myself. Although I had very little money with me, I wanted to find out what Kevin was up to.
"Good afternoon and welcome to the Plaza Hotel. My name is Mr Hector. I am the Concierge. How may I help?" He gabbled this as though memorising it from a prompt card.
"I need a room," I replied, in a similarly impressive English accent.
"Have you made a reservation?"
"Er…no."
"Well then, I'm afraid you'll have to make a reservation and then come back to us. The telephone is over there, madam." He gestured vaguely at a grey box around the corner.
"Please, you don't understand. I'm going to be looking after a child over the Christmas holiday and he is really ill, and this may be the last holiday he ever gets to see…"
"I understand, madam, but…"
"I want it to be special for him. I want it to be the best experience he has. Have you no rooms at all?" You see, I had just unknowingly done exactly what Kevin was famous for. Telling lies. Mr Hector looked at me and smiled sympathetically.
"Perhaps we might be able to find you a room? Something fancy you say? Leave it to me. I shall see what I can do."
"Oh thank you!" I cried.
"Oh, and do excuse me. May I have a name, please?"
"Oh, yes…" I trailed off, trying to think of something impressive. "Countess Nicolette of Worcestershire."
At once Mr Hector's manner changed.
"Oh, my lady, we have a beautiful penthouse available. Would you care to use that? It has a glorious view of the park?"
I nodded quickly.
"Yes, that would be wonderful, but please understand, I would rather no one knew that I am staying here, you see, I wouldn't like the media to find out."
"Of course not." Mr Hector agreed. "Cedric, will you please show this young lady to room 1765 please?"
Cedric looked from Mr Hector to me, and gave me a great false smile.
"Right this way, Miss."
So I was taken to the amazingly expensive penthouse and I must admit, it was luxury beyond compare. Everything was edged in gold leaf, there were silk bed sheets and reproduction antiques grazing the tops of the walnut and mahogany furniture, and a fridge full of snacks and beverages.
"This is our finest suite, Miss." Cedric explained, giving me a guided tour of it all. "Upstairs you have the main parlour which has all modern conveniences…"
"I'm not going to live here." I pointed out, "I'll explore for myself."
"Very well." He rubbed his fingers together, signifying that he wanted a tip. I reached into my bag and pulled out a five dollar bill.
"Here you go." I slammed the door and walked into my bedroom. A princess couldn't have been happier in this place. I called my office from the phone to tell them I wouldn't be coming in that afternoon, and they agreed to let me take the rest of the day off. To be honest, it was rather boring sitting around in the penthouse all afternoon, so I went down to the swimming pool and then realised I had nothing to change into, so I called a taxi and quickly packed my stuff into a bag at my apartment and had another taxi take me straight back to the Plaza.
I carried my bag up the stairs and wandered around the floors curiously. By this time, it was dark, and as I walked along the second floor corridor I saw Mr Hector coming out of one of the doors clutching his leg.
"Are you ok?" I asked.
"Yes, yes I'm fine." He bluffed, "Just hit the old leg on a table, that's all."
"Oh." I groaned.
"I forgot to ask you, your Ladyship, is everything to your satisfaction? No problems at all?"
"No, not at all." I answered in my best upper class accent.
"Good good. Well, I'd best be off now." And he limped across to the elevator.
So I returned to my penthouse where I slept until 6am the next morning. It was Christmas Eve, and unfortunately I HAD to work. I came down to the lobby and was about to cross to the restaurant for breakfast when I saw Kevin coming out of the elevator. Mr Hector suddenly became very flustered.
"Mr McCallister!" He called, and Kevin shook his head dramatically. He was already wearing his bobble hat and green coat.
"And how are we this morning?" Considering that he'd hurt his leg the night before, he did a great job of sprinting to Kevin.
"Fine. Is my transportation here?" Kevin asked grandly.
"Out in front sir. A limousine and a piz-za, compliments of the Plaza hotel. I do hope your father understands that last night…I was simply checking the room to make sure that everything was in order."
Wait a minute? Father? Dad wasn't there with him, I knew that for certain. He was in Florida where Kevin should have been.
"Oh well, he was pretty mad." Kevin replied,
"He was?" Repeated Mr Hector worriedly.
"He said he didn't come all the way to New York to get his naked rear end spied on."
I had to laugh at this. My little brother could really act!
"Of course not." Agreed Mr Hector, "will he be down…soon?"
"He already left." Kevin answered promptly.
"Oh…I would have liked to have offered my personal apology…"
"If some guy looked at you in the shower would you ever want to see him again?"
"I suppose not." Mr Hector drawled.
"I don't think you'll see him for the rest of our trip." Well, duh. Dad was miles away in Florida.
"I understand."
"Bye." Kevin added and walked off.
"Have a lovely day!"
His smile faltered and became a snobbish frown and he sauntered off toward the office. Oh God, he was going to check the details of Kevin's credit card, the card he must have used to pay for the hotel room.
I knew I had to stop him.
"Oh, Mr Hector!" I called. He whirled around, the smile fixed back on his face.
"Good morning, madam."
"What was that about, might I ask, sir?"
"Oh nothing. A little delinquent staying in the hotel."
"Oh, how frightfully awful. Who is he?"
"I don't know. A young fellow who is supposedly staying with his father."
"You think he may be lying?"
"Without a doubt, my lady. Now, how may I be of service?"
"I was wondering, might I have my newspapers delivered to my room?"
"Of course, my lady. Is there anything else?"
"Yes. How is your leg this morning, Mr Hector, sir?"
He leant down and rubbed his calf dramatically.
"It is rather sore, but never mind."
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that."
"If you will excuse me, I have to check some details." He limped off toward the office. Oh dear, I thought, Kevin's gonna get in trouble now.
I wandered over to the front of the hotel and watched a fat chauffeur open the door into the limo for Kevin, and Cedric presenting him with his favourite cheese pizza. At 9am in the morning! I thought he'd probably had breakfast, but eating pizza so soon after? Idiot.
The limo drove away; Kevin safely tucked away inside, and Cedric sprinting up the steps.
"Morning, Miss." He called. I groaned.
"Hello. Which way is the restaurant?"
"Down that flight of stairs, Miss."
"Thanks." I scuttled off to the restaurant, keeping a beady eye on Mr Hector as I walked by. He seemed to be very pleased, and I saw him murmur 'bingo' to himself. I walked over to the desk and he quickly shoved the card slip underneath some Plaza stationery.
"Ah, yes, madam. Your newspapers. Which would you like?" He brought out a list and pushed it across the counter top. "Please tick which you would like and I will have them sent up."
"Thank you, Mr Hector. Any news on the little delinquent?" I whispered.
"Yes actually. I shall be interrogating him as soon as he returns."
"Oh, I shouldn't be too hard on him." I suggested. After all, as much as I thought Kevin was a loser, I didn't want him scared.
"We'll deal with him in a proper manner, Miss…"
"Oh, sorry. Miss…" I quickly scanned the room for a name and caught sight of a poster with BURGHLEY REALTY on it. "Miss Burghley." Fortunately during my time at high school we'd performed Pygmalion, so I knew how to do a good posh English accent.
"Miss Burghley, is there anything else?"
"No, that's it."
"Good day to you, Miss Burghley."
I left the desk and went to the restaurant, where I had a refreshing breakfast and then left for work. I took a taxi to my offices and settled down for work.
"Mary, I'm so sorry I'm late." I apologised.
"Hey, don't worry Kelly. Dana said you're staying at the Plaza. Is that true?"
"Yeah."
"Well, come on then. Who's the guy?"
"Oh, no it's nothing like that…I'm babysitting…"
"Sure. I thought all your brothers and sisters lived in Chicago."
"Yeah, but my little brother Kevin has come to stay with my Uncle Rob and Aunt Georgette, but they're renovating their new house so I booked us in at the Plaza. Mom doesn't know."
"Oh my God! You haven't told your mother?"
"I don't need to, Mary. If Mom calls me I'll just tell her that he's safe, Ok. So don't worry."
It got to Lunch and I returned to the Plaza. As I was crossing the road I saw Kevin running toward the entrance, like he was being chased or something. When he got to the porch, Mr Hector smiled crookedly.
"You gotta help me!" Kevin gasped, "There's two guys after me!"
"What's the matter?" Mr Hector sneered, "Store wouldn't take your…" He snatched the credit card from Kevin's pocket. "STOLEN credit card?! Let's see what the police have to say about this." But Kevin legged it as Mr Hector attempted to grab him and chased him through into the hotel. I dropped what was left of my lunch and followed them. I could hear Mr Hector shouting 'Stop that Child!' and Cedric trying to catch him, but they were both too slow.
"GRAB HIM!" Mr Hector yelled at the receptionist lady, the one who looked like my eleventh grade teacher. She turned around from her position by the elevators and held open her arms, making her look quite comical. I needed to grab Kevin myself, but he sailed through her legs into the elevator and bashed the button, the doors closing on him just as all three hotel staff collided in a heap on the floor.
"You little…" Mr Hector hissed as the door closed, and I came out of my hiding place behind a tall plant.
"What on earth is going on?" I demanded in my best snobbish tone.
"Get me security!" Mr Hector yelled, ignoring me, "We have to stop that delinquent!" He saw me and smiled.
"We have a slight situation here, Miss Burghley. Please come and find me later if you wish to make a complaint."
"What kind of situation?" I demanded.
"The young delinquent has returned."
"Ah I see."
"Please excuse me, Your Ladyship." He rushed off, dragging a rather bemused Cedric across the floor by the arm.
I watched as they gathered a security team together, some of the dumbest people I'd ever seen. A short old guy whose nametag read 'Cliff' another tall yet weedy guy 'Donald' and of course, 'Brenda' the receptionist, Mr Hector himself and Cedric, who was moaning that he had hurt his head.
They raced upstairs to Kevin's room, me in pursuit. I hid on one of the sofas behind a column near Kevin's room, and they all burst in.
"Hold it right there!" I heard someone command, and it wasn't Kevin.
"This is the concierge sir." Explained Mr Hector's voice, pompously.
"I knew it was you, I could smell ya getting off the elevator." The mysterious voice retorted, and I knew I'd heard it somewhere before, I just couldn't think where. "You was 'ere last night too, wasn't ya?"
"Yes sir, I was."
"You was 'ere. And you was smoochin' with my brother."
I then realised what was so familiar. Kevin was playing a gangster film called 'Angels with Even Filthier Souls' and fast forwarding through the girl's dialogue so it sounded like 'Johnny' the gangster guy was in the room.
"Bah!" Mr Hector scoffed, "I'm…afraid you're mistaken, sir."
"Don't give me that, you been smoochin' with everybody. Snuffy, Al, Leo, Little Moe with the gimpy leg, Cheeks, Boney Bob, Cliff." There was a gasp and I knew that it came from Cliff.
"No, it's a lie!" He protested.
"I could go on forever, baby." 'Johnny' snapped.
"I'm terribly sorry sir, but I'm afraid you're mistaken. We're looking for a young man." Mr Hector persisted.
"All right. I believe ya. But my Tommy gun don't. Get down on ya knees and tell me ya love me."
"On your knees." Ordered Mr Hector nervously and after a pause he exclaimed "I Love You!"
"You gotta do better than that." 'Johnny' scoffed.
"I LOVE YOU!" Agreed the other staff.
"Maybe I'm off my hinges but I believe ya. That's why I'm gonna let you go. I'm gonna give you to the count of three to get your lousy, lying, low down four' flushed carcass out my door."
The staff threw themselves on the floor and covered their heads as 'Johnny' went mad with the gun. Kevin slyly slipped away through the fire escape. I quickly raced after him.
"Kevin!" I called.
He stopped on the stairs.
"Kelly?"
"Kevin, what's going on? What are you doing in New York? Mom said you'd gone to Florida."
I heard the voices of the concierge behind me and Kevin ran off without a second glance.
"Brothers." I murmured to myself and sadly returned to the lobby, where Mr Hector was waiting.
"Why, Miss McCallister, this is a pleasant surprise. I thought you might be helping your brother out."
"My…brother?" I asked worriedly.
"Yes. Mr McCallister left this in his room?"
He held up Dad's address book.
"Oh shoot."
"Exactly, Miss McCallister. Your details match the address in this book." I leant forward to take it, but Mr Hector held it away.
"No, Miss McCallister. If you'd care to come this way. I would like to speak to you."
I followed him into the office and sat down on a chair.
"Now, I want the truth, Miss McCallister. Is Mr McCallister your brother?"
"Yes."
"And why do you think he lied to us all about being here with his father?"
"I don't know. God, he told Mom he wanted to go somewhere with a Christmas tree. He has this fascination with them, and Mom and Dad organised for the family to go to Florida for Christmas, where there aren't many Christmas trees. I tell you what, why don't you call the police now, and tell them to contact my parents? That way you can find out everything. My little brother is not stupid, you know. He might be a loser, but he's not stupid. He has this strange ability to plan things out on the spot. I know what he did was wrong, and I know what I've done is wrong, but please, don't hold it against him. He's a kid, and he's lost in New York City all by himself."
"I understand that, Miss McCallister, but your brother has committed credit card fraud. That is a criminal offence."
"I know, sir…."
"And why did you lie to us about your own room arrangements?"
"I don't know…I just needed to get help for my brother. I was hoping that if he got chucked out of here he might be able to share my room, that's why i booked for two people. As soon as I saw him and you told Cedric to find out everything about him, I just knew…"
"That we aren't as blind as we seem?"
"Yes…I mean, no." I replied, seeing his face, "if he comes back to the Plaza you will be civil to him, won't you? I mean…" I trailed off, and remembered what I'd said to Mary. "Oh, God! Uncle Rob and Aunt Georgette are renovating, Kevin will go there and find that out and he'll be wandering the streets looking for somewhere to go."
"If he returns, I will let you know, Miss McCallister."
"Thanks, I suggest you call the police and tell them what you know. Mom and Dad will be going spare when they find out."
"I'll arrange for a taxi to take you home, Miss McCallister." He picked up the phone and dialled 911.
"Thanks, but I'll get my own."
I returned to my 'penthouse' for the last time and packed my bags before heading home in a taxi. When I got there I found several frantic calls from Mom on my answer machine:
"Hi, Kelly, it's Mom. Kevin has gone missing. I don't know where he is. If he turns up in New York let me know."
"Hi Kelly, if Kevin is there with you, please call me. I'm going frantic with worry."
And then the phone rang again.
"Hello?" I asked.
"Kelly, its Mom. We're on the next flight to New York. Kevin used your father's credit card to check into the Plaza Hotel. The likelihood is he's going to try and visit Aunt Georgette's place, so please keep an eye out for him."
"I will, don't worry, Mom. We'll find him."
"Yeah, I hope. Kelly, when we get to New York, I'll give you a call. Meet us at the Plaza."
"Ok."
"Bye, sweetheart."
"Bye Mom."
So after another hour or so, Mom called me and I rushed to the Plaza where Uncle Frank, his wife Leslie and the kids were waiting with Mom and Dad.
"Kelly!" Dad cried, "How are you?"
"I'm fine."
"Here's my big girl!" Cried Aunt Leslie, "gosh, how you've grown." She swept me into a rib-cracking hug.
"Yeah, hi, Aunt Leslie." I saw Buzz sniggering and made a hand gesture at him.
"Right, now where do we find this Mr Hector guy?" Asked Dad.
I pointed at the concierge desk, where Mr Hector sat looking decidedly sheepish. Mom marched over to the desk and slammed her palm on it.
"Ah, good evening. You must be Mr and Mrs McCallister. I'm very sorry about what has happened, but we'd like to offer you a complimentary suite while you're here. It's a penthouse with a view of the park, I'm sure you'll find it satisfactory it was recently vacated by the Countess of Worcestershire." He narrowed his eyes at me. Mom wasn't impressed.
"What kind of hotel allows a child to check in alone?"
"The boy had a very convincing story." Replied Brenda.
Mom lost her temper at this.
"What kind of idiots do you have working here?"
"The finest in New York." And they pulled these really false grins, making them all look very dumb and gullible.
"I mean when you discovered that the credit card was stolen…" Dad interjected crossly.
"I made the discovery," Interrupted Mr Hector proudly.
"Why did you let him leave?" Snapped Mom furiously.
"When we attempted to confront him, he ran."
"You scared him away!" Scorned my father, now losing his patience.
"It's Christmas Eve, and because of you, our child is lost in one of the biggest cities in the world." Mom continued. Mr Hector hung his head like a child who has been caught with stolen candy. Cedric nodded in agreement. Mr Hector glared at him.
"Could you please take our family and our luggage up to the room?" Dad asked coldly.
"Run along, Cedric." Mr Hector hissed.
"I'm going to go down to the police station and make sure they're doing everything in their power to find Kevin. I want you to stay here with Frank, Leslie and the kids." Explained Dad.
"No!" Snapped Mom, hotly, "I'm going out to look for him…"
"What?"
"With all due respect madam, your son is lost in one of the biggest cities in the world." Mr Hector pointed out. Mom shot him a glare, and I felt like shouting that it was his fault. He should have been more sensible than to confront a ten year old boy in that manner.
"Could you stay out of this, please?" Dad commanded in that authoritative voice I knew so well.
"As you wish."
"Thank you. I don't think it's a good idea for you to start running around New York City all by yourself…" He added to Mom.
"I think if our son can do it, I can do it." Mom retorted.
"Kate…"
"Peter! I'll be fine! The way I'm feeling right now, no mugger or murderer would DARE mess with me!"
"Madam, there are hundreds of parasites out there, armed to the teeth…" Mom had had enough of Mr Hector's interference and slapped him hard. I would have done exactly the same.
"Do bundle up, it's awfully cold outside." He added, I saw tears brewing in his eyes and he nibbled his lip in a childish manner. God, what was he? A man or mouse? Brenda was looking at him worriedly, as if to say 'what do we do now?' Mom threw her bag down on the trolley and raced over to the entrance.
"Mom, do you want me to come with you?" I asked gently.
"No, it's all right. I'll be ok. You stay here and look after the kids. If that Mr Hector comes sniffing around, just give him another slap, will you?"
"Of course Mom." I smiled and watched her get into the taxi and drive away. It was quarter to twelve on Christmas Eve, Kevin was lost somewhere in the City, Mom was running around looking for him and I had just been made babysitter to all my cousins and siblings. What a great way to spend the evening! I trailed back through the lobby toward the elevator.
"Miss McCallister!" Mr Hector called. I swivelled around.
"Your mother…she's rather a violent woman, isn't she?" He gave a nervous chuckle.
"Oh yes, how is your face after that?" I snapped.
"Rather sore, I must admit, Miss McCallister, but please understand, I acted in accordance with our Guest Code when presented with the credit card as evidence of fraud."
"Sure, Mr Hector. But my brother is lost somewhere in New York City because you scared him away by reacting irrationally. I mean, he's a kid for God's sake! Are you all so dumb as to not know how to deal with a kid?"
"Well, I…I…I'm dreadfully sorry about what has happened, I do hope your brother is found safely."
"I hope so too." I agreed cuttingly, "Oh, and thank you for all your help."
I swept away into the elevator and went to our room, well, formerly my room. Buzz was already stuffing his face from the little refrigerator and Fuller and the boys were testing out the beds to see which ones made the best trampolines. The girls were sitting quietly in front of the TV, watching the Christmas special of the Tonight show and gossiping.
"Fuller! Get off the bed! Do you want to get us thrown out?" Snapped Lennie crossly.
"Ah come on!" Groaned Uncle Frank, "this is a really fancy place. Let 'em have some fun."
I took a seat on the sofa upstairs where Aunt Leslie was staring out the window.
"Aunt Leslie, are you ok?"
"I'm fine, dear. I just hope Kevin is ok."
"Yeah, so do I. But he's tough. He'll survive."
Little were we to know, that Kevin was actually being a hero at this time, and helping to put two guys back behind bars where they belonged. It got to about five to twelve and we'd just put the kids to bed when I decided that it was my duty to go out and look for Kevin, despite Mom's plea to search by herself. I had an idea where he might be, I mean, where else would a kid go on Christmas Eve? A toy store!
I knew the biggest and best toy store was Duncan's near Fifth Avenue, so I chose to visit there first. It was a long shot, but Kevin still liked to look at toys.
I took the taxi to the front of Duncan's. It was all locked up for Christmas, and looked very eerie in the dark. Kevin was no where to be seen.
My next thought was to visit Aunt Georgette's so I had the taxi take me there. However hard I banged on the door, there was no reply. Desperate, I was stupid enough to enter Central Park, where I met the bird lady.
"You haven't seen a little boy by any chance, have you?" I asked her nervously.
"Why, yes, I have." I held out the photo I always carried in my purse. "this boy?" She gestured at Kevin.
"Yeah! Oh, God, where did you see him?" I exclaimed excitedly.
"He was sitting with me at the concert hall balcony, he said he'd been bad and done a lot of things wrong. I told him that a good deed erases a bad deed and he said that he wasn't sure he would have time to do all the things he needed to erase his bad deed, but I've got a feeling he was going to help someone tonight."
"So you don't know where he went?"
"No, I'm sorry, my dear. Is he a relative of yours?"
"Yes, he's my brother. He's such a little idiot."
"But he has a good heart, my dear."
"Oh yeah, there's no denying that. If you see him again, tell him that we're all so worried and staying at the Plaza Hotel."
"I will do. Goodbye."
She walked off into the night leaving me to search the park alone. In the distance I could hear bells ringing. Surely it wasn't midnight already? I checked my watch and gasped. It was midnight. Where the hell could I find Kevin now?
I walked back past Aunt Georgette's house, just as there was an almighty bang and the lights flashed.
"Oh my God!" I cried, "Someone could be in there!"
Then I saw it, a large bag on the pavement. I looked inside. It was stuffed full of money. Oh God! This couldn't be Kevin's, could it? Then I peered more closely. No, it belonged to someone named Harry Marvin.
I didn't know what to do. Should I take it to the local police and explain that I'd found it, or should I just leave it? After all, whoever the money belonged to they might think it was me who'd stolen it.
Suddenly I saw Kevin, abseiling down the front of Aunt Georgette's house.
"Kevin!" I called, "what are you doing?"
"All right, kid, where are ya?" I saw two faces appear on the roof.
"I'm down here, you big horse's ass!"
The two guys peered over.
"Nice night for a neck injury." Kevin commented fearlessly.
"Suck brick, kid!" Yelled the taller guy, throwing down a brick with such pathetic aim it fell straight to the floor.
"You need to work on your aim." Kevin replied.
"Come on, Marv!" Commanded the shorter guy, swinging himself over the side of the roof and beginning to abseil down the front on the rope.
"Oh, I don't know…" 'Marv' protested, but the other guy wasn't going to take no for an answer.
"I said come on. Come on you big sissy." Goaded the shorter guy. By now Kevin had reached the bottom.
"You wearin aftershave?" Asked one of the men.
"That ain't aftershave, it's kerosene. The rope is soaked in it."
"Now why would anybody soak a rope in kerosene?"
Kevin struck a match against the wall and lit the rope.
"Merry Christmas." He grinned.
"Kevin!" I called.
"Kelly?"
"Kevin, what the hell is going on? Who are these two guys?"
"They're robbers. They stole the kiddie's charity money from Duncan's Toy Store. They got no right to do that."
"Kevin, they might be dangerous." I warned him.
"Oh well." He replied carelessly, "I'll just call 911."
"No, you're coming back to the Plaza with me. Mom's been going mad with worry. We all have."
"I just need to sort this out, first, ok?"
"Why did you run away from the Plaza, Kevin?"
"I got scared." He replied, and I saw him for what he was, a frightened child trying to be a grown up.
"Yeah, well, you need to come with me. How d'you know they haven't got guns or whatever?"
"I know." He answered simply, "Kelly, I'm ten years old, I'm barely able to tie up my own shoelace, but I wanna prove to myself that I can do something good."
"Kevin, you're always being good."
"No I'm not. I wind everyone up."
"Kevin, it's what families do…Oh God." The two bandits had let go of the rope and fallen into the pit at the basement causing hundreds of paint cans to fall on them, as well as bricks and half-finished wooden planks.
"Wow!" Kevin muttered. "This is great. Gotta go, sis. Don't worry. I'll be fine!" And he rushed off. The two bandits got up somehow and raced after him, snatching the bag as they went. I did not confront them, they were too busy pursuing Kevin to notice me.
I ran to the nearest call box and dialled 911.
"Hello? Yes, there are two bandits in Central Park, West 95th Street with a bag full of money. I think they may have some weapons with them, please hurry!"
A few minutes later the police arrived and several fireworks shot up into the sky. I saw the two bandits being led out of the park by the police and hoped that Kevin would be coming with them, but he did not. Oh God, I thought, I've lost him again!
My feet were aching by now and I was really tired, so I called a cab and had them return me to the Plaza, where I found Mom with Kevin in the lobby. Mr Hector gave him a glare as he walked by the desk, and Kevin smiled cheekily back at him, giving him a little wave.
"Mom!" I called, "where did you find him?"
"At the Rockefeller Center…"
"By the Christmas tree, I bet."
"Madam, might I suggest that you adjourn to your room? It is rather late." Insisted Mr Hector.
"I suppose so. Come on Kevin, you've caused enough trouble for one day." I hissed as we walked back to the penthouse.
When we opened the door, Aunt Leslie threw her arms around us all, and Uncle Frank shook his head.
"All right, Kevin?"
"Yeah, Uncle Frank."
"Come on, let's get you to bed. You've had a long day." Aunt Leslie ordered, helping Kevin into the main bedroom where he was soon tucked up in a warm bed alongside Mark, our cousin. They were all squashed in together, the girls on one side of the room, boys on the other. We sneaked out of the room and each went to our own rooms. I ended up sleeping on the sofa bed in the upper part of the penthouse. Still, it was Christmas, and by the look of things, it was going to be one of the best.
I heard Fuller call out 'it's Christmas!' at about half eight in the morning, and all the kids rushed up to the second floor where I had been sleeping to discover a huge tree surrounded by presents of all shapes and sizes. At first I couldn't believe it. It wasn't possible.
"Mom you gotta see this!" Called Lennie excitedly, and Mom and Dad appeared.
"Peter…" Mom sighed, thinking he had been the one to organise this.
"Are you sure we're in the right room?" Dad replied worriedly.
No one was listening. We all seized a package and began to shake them excitedly.
"Hey, everyone just calm down." Buzz shouted over us. They quickly calmed down. "Now, if Kevin hadn't have screwed up in the first place, again we wouldn't be in this…most perfect and huge hotel room with a truckload of all this free stuff, so I think it only fair that Kevin gets to open up the first present, then I'll go and the rest of you and so on…Merry Christmas, Kev." He chucked a parcel at Kevin.
"Merry Christmas, Buzz." Kevin grinned.
We all clapped him and although he didn't think I noticed, I saw him slip away and followed him.
"Where are you going this time?"
"To see a friend." He replied, "I want to wish her a happy Christmas."
"Ok, I'll tell Mom for you."
"Thanks, Kelly."
"You're all right, Kevin. For a brother."
"You're all right…for a sister."
"Get outta here!" I scoffed, and he ran off, dressed in his coat and hat and mittens.
A few minutes later, after we'd finished emptying all the presents, there was a knock at the door.
"Buzz, get that, will you?" Mom called. Buzz groaned and went to the door.
"Mr McCallister's room service bill, sir." Explained Cedric, with a grin, "Merry Christmas sir." He held up his hands for a tip but Buzz pulled his chewing gum out of his mouth and dropped it on his white gloves.
I walked over to Buzz, who unravelled the list, smiling wickedly.
"What's he done this time?" I asked.
"Look at this." Buzz pointed at the total on the last sheet. $967.43! "Merry Christmas indeed."
"God! How'd he spend that much?"
"Who knows? Oh Dad!" Buzz called, and Dad came over. He took one look at the bill and turned bright red.
"KEVIN! YOU SPENT $967 ON ROOM SERVICE?!" He bellowed. How lucky was Kevin to be out wishing a Merry Christmas to his friend, I thought.
Dad was in a foul mood for the rest of the morning. I quietly slipped out to the lobby after we'd finished watching some TV and waited for Kevin to return. As I entered the lobby, Mr Hector, who was wearing a very outlandish Christmas hat flashed me a very false smile.
"Good morning, Miss McCallister. Merry Christmas to you."
"Same to you, Mr Hector, sir." I replied politely.
"I haven't seen your brother this morning? Can I expect to see him at the Children's Christmas Party this afternoon?"
"I shouldn't think so, Mr Hector." I replied.
Kevin came through the doors looking very pleased.
"Kevin, if you know what's good for you, you'll go and get yourself lost in New York again." I told him. He grinned. Mr Hector came over to us and leaned over slightly to reach Kevin's height.
"Ah, Mr McCallister, how nice to see you again. No problems I hope?" he sneered sarcastically.
"I believe you have something to say to Mr Hector, Kevin?" I asked pointedly.
"I'm sorry, Mr Hector."
"I trust your room service bill has been delivered?" Mr Hector asked. Kevin walked away.
"Yes, Mr Hector. I need to talk to you about that. You see, there is NO WAY that Kevin could have spent all that money, he doesn't even know how to place an order."
"Well, Miss McCallister, I'm afraid that I must contradict you. The main items purchased on your father's credit card were 'special' items, such as desserts and the like. Oh, and there are lots of extra charges for laundry and hire of videos etc."
I bit my lip. I wanted to laugh. Was Mr Hector still that dumb as to have not figured out that he had been fooled by a movie set up?
"Kevin told me that there was a gunman in the hotel. Has he been apprehended?"
"Of course. I would prefer if we kept that between us, Miss McAllister. As much as I hate to say it, your brother is a very clever young man."
"Kevin, you do realise that you're going to be grounded until the next century?" I warned him, beckoning him over.
"It's ok."
"Isn't there some way that you can lighten the load on the room service bill, Mr Hector?"
"Lighten the load, Miss McCallister? Certainly not. This is a hotel, not a bar."
"Ok, thanks Mr Hector. So, Kevin, what happened after you left the Plaza?" I asked him loudly as I led him away.
"Two guys chased me through Central Park and I tried to get a taxi but there was a really evil-looking guy driving it. I ran away and I tried to get inside Uncle Rob's house…"
"Oh, you must have been so scared." I lowered my voice, "Kevin, play along, he might reduce the bill."
"Yeah, I was, but I thought 'I'll be fine someone's sure to find me'. But they didn't and the two guys who chased me earlier turned up at Uncle Rob's house and they tried to kill me but I escaped. I pulled the tool chest on them."
"Oh, Kevin!" I sighed dramatically.
"Wait a minute, Miss McCallister." Called Mr Hector.
"Bingo!" I hissed to Kevin, swivelling around. "Yes Mr Hector?"
"Perhaps I might be able to sort something out with the bill. After all, you've been through enough, Mr McCallister."
"Yes, he has. Thank you, Mr Hector." I replied.
"Yes, well…let me sort that out for you…" He walked off and I leant down to Kevin's height.
"You know what this means, right, Kevin?"
"Another Christmas in the trenches." He answered confidently, and we both laughed.
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