Vessel for the Light

And you. You're just like the big sister that ignores the little brother even though I'm way older than you.

Angela sat looking out at the water, watching the ripples. She felt the breeze ripple through her hair, teasing the loose locks. She focused on nothing in particular and was content to stare. It was the look that Sam pretty much hated but as she said, sometimes there wasn't really a look that adequately explained how she felt and thought. After all she did learn a horrible truth and it ate at her.

It pretty much was an easy plan in terms of sending Dean to get the Hand of God, the potential weapon to use against Amara. Crazy yes since it involved time travel and the power of an angel but it was one of the few choices they had. True she could use Absolution since she hadn't tried previous but… things had changed. She absently rubbed the swell of her abdomen.

What really interests me is why you didn't sense something was wrong in the first place.

Something was wrong. Angela knew that as she caressed her abdomen and thought about it. It wasn't the first time that she hadn't been able to sense her angel, her Castiel. It could be chalked up to that but… She had always been able to tell if something was or wasn't her family. Hell she knew that siren wasn't what her eyes were showing her and she really knew that it was those Leviathans that had impersonated Sam and Dean.

There were a lot of changes she had noticed since becoming pregnant and it bothered her to a degree apart from being near stressed out in fear of learning more about what Amara said she did. She had heard of women becoming more hormonal and such when being pregnant but the fact that things she took for granted weren't working… it was adding to her stress and worry that she wouldn't be able to do what she had to do and protect her family.

It really, really bothered her that Castiel had said yes and taken Lucifer in and she couldn't sense it. It also made her scared. So far she wasn't showing enough and she wore Sam's shirts to hide it but… It terrified her to think about what Lucifer would do if he found out that she was pregnant and with Sam's baby no less. It was why she couldn't really answer him when she barged in like she did.

"I have to ask why you think it wise to sit out here and in your condition," a familiar voice sounded right next to her.

Angela didn't flinched but turned to look at her visitor. "One thing hasn't changed. I'm still a dhampir and don't get cold easily." She looked at the water and then asked, "Are you alright after what happened Amitiel?"

Amitiel stretched her arms slightly as she sat next to Angela. "I am fine. I pulled back and let you take over before the sigil was used. Then I left."

"And scared them both in the process." Angela looked at the Archangel of Truth. "You're lucky that they didn't decide to go angel hunting."

"And I told you that it wouldn't hurt the baby. I was one of two that placed protection on it." Amitiel looked at Angela slightly exasperated like she couldn't believe she was going to bring it up again.

"And Gadreel was the other." Angela made a slight humming sound and her mouth twitched in the barest of smiles. She always knew the angel that misled her by calling himself Ezekiel was a good one despite what happened to him. And she long forgiven and thanked both angels for keeping the baby safe. Granted it was a long time to do so but she was glad of it. "And for that I am grateful to you both."

Amitiel smiled gently, "He couldn't let you die."

Angela smiled at the archangel. "I always thought he was a good one."

"And it's what you've always done, Sister. Since the beginning."

Angela sighed at that when she heard it. "So it is true."

"It was hard keeping it from you every time we met. But I respect our Father's wishes and what you asked for when it was done. All I could do was to help you when you needed it."

"And people wonder why I say fuck you and help me at the same time to angels." Angela couldn't help but chuckle at that. It was an irony of sorts and in the end knowing the truth kind of explained why things happened the way they did. It was a sort of relief but not a complete one. It still had her apprehensive about things that have happened and what will happen.

"Well my brothers and sisters don't quite understand and it took me centuries watching humans to understand," Amitiel offered. She studied Angela as the woman continued to sit and stare at the water. She noticed a clam that was anything but what it was. "What has you so afraid, Sister?"

"Not sure you should be calling me that."

Amitiel hummed at that, "More than ever. But seriously, what has you afraid?"

Angela looked at the archangel as she absently rubbed her abdomen. Her expression became pensive and sad as she thought about it. She looked back at the water and watched as the wind made ripples. Her eyes flickered slightly as she stared.

The funny thing is… I don't really need you anymore, Sam. You are deadweight. Her deadweight.

That was when Lucifer decided to kill Sam. At the time Angela had been in the kitchen since she had a craving for tea and a sip of the blood she kept in there. It made her nauseous at times thinking that she had cravings for it but it made her sick if she didn't have a regimen of it like a once a week thing. It made the morning sickness like a tea party.

Then she felt a sharp white hot pain. It shot down her spine that no sound came out except a silent gasp. It felt like when she had been stabbed in the back and died the first time. She felt pain but it wasn't her pain. It was Sam's pain and it was then that she started to collapse in pain. She was feeling Sam's pain and she felt paralyzed and numb about it. She couldn't move even though her body was screaming to go and help Sam but also protect her baby.

I'll help you, sister. Just let me in.

Angela turned to look at Amitiel. She never liked possession. It was a bitch and she would know having had a couple of gods and at one point a demon riding her ass. And yet she allowed an angel in. And she had a front row seat when she confronted Lucifer.

You always had to show your badass side. And to the wrong person.

"I'm afraid of something I don't remember and that it will come after what I hold dear." Angela looked at Amitiel. "What Lucifer tried to do to Sam…" She looked away for a moment before turning back. "You saved us. Bought Cas time to take control…"

"And Lucifer is still in him," Amitiel replied sadly. She looked away and chewed her lower lip. "And all because he was afraid." She looked at Angela with a firm look. "But you can do it."

Angela was taken aback by that. "What?"

"Lucifer isn't wrong you know," Amitiel replied. She put a hand on Angela's shoulder. "You can beat Amara, capture Darkness and defeat her."

"Not you too."

"Hear me out." Amitiel put her other hand on Angela's shoulder to look at her square in the eye. "It is true. You were created as an angel. You were the one created to be all that Father is. It was so much that you and your other half were the first of their kind."

Angela sighed at that. She didn't speak but her expression became pensive. She long knew that she was to be a defender of mortals and she fought against it. This she fought against but not as hard. A small part of her entertained the notion that it was true even though she didn't want it to be. She was tired; tired of things happening and taking away the happiness she found.

Amitiel knew that the dhampir was not happy to hear her words. In truth, she didn't want to drop this on her. She wished it were anyone else. But she knew that Angela wouldn't be able to live with herself unless she had done something. She continued, "It is true. You know me and what I am."

"Truth."

"And what I say is the truth. The Scribe knows it too." Amitiel paused and then continued, "I know it is not fair and I don't wish it upon you but in all honesty, you are the one to best Amara."

"I don't remember and as far as I can tell it's an elaborate plot to get me to be heaven's bitch again."

"And I don't blame you. The moment I learned about the child, I wanted to shield you from everything. But I know you. You would have protested it."

Angela couldn't help but smirk at that. "You know me well. As much as Sam knows me."

"Well…"

"Don't," Angela warned with a slight smile. "I tolerate being called the earthbound angel but I am not that." She put her hands on her lap and looked at them clasped. Sighing she asked, "You really think that I can do this?"

"From what I know and what you have done," Amitiel affirmed.

"Can't just pull out a good old fashioned yes or no can't you?"

"Alright," Amitiel replied with a chuckle, "Yes. And you are not alone." She cleared her throat and added, "Your old army is mustering. The Army of the Light."

"Tell me about it." Angela looked up at the night sky. "Kesset has a way with things."

"We follow because you are a leader at heart. And we believe. Sometimes all you need is faith."

Angela sighed at that. She felt that her own words were being used against her. She really couldn't see how this was going to work since she was pregnant and she suspected there would be fighting involved. True she could fight up until she had to slow down and give birth but… She didn't want to let anyone know but the worrying and everything else… she was getting exhausted. She felt that if she were completely human, she would be in a worse off state. "And further down the road?"

Amitiel looked at Angela. She knew the apprehensions. Gently she put a hand to the swell and looked Angela in the eye and replied, "Have faith. There are three great things. And I will keep my promise."

Angela looked at the angel and raised her brow at that declaration. "You've done enough."

"Not really. I'll help you." Amitiel sat up and paused a moment since she was going to suggest something that was probably going to be met with resistance. "I'll help you remember if you want and you'll need to develop your abilities even more so." She stopped talking and stared at Angela in the eye.

Angela didn't like what was being suggested and yet… She didn't like where this was going but in the end it was going to come down to one thing and that was meeting Amara on the battlefield. She looked out over the water and thought about things. Mostly she thought about how it would affect her family and that one still needed to be saved. She pressed her tongue on the back of her teeth as if to decide what to say when she felt it.

Pressing her hand to her abdomen, she felt it again and looked down at the swell. She stared at it for a moment to think before looking up and looked at Amitiel in the eye and gave a nod.

Amitiel nodded in reply and turned to look out at the water. The archangel knew that it was going to be a difficult battle. That the earthbound angel could do it she didn't doubt it. There was never any doubt. But she knew that it would be hard on her and the Winchesters. She didn't have to ask since she knew that both brothers were dealing with what had happened and what to do. And if she did, they would tell her the truth. For now though, the road was going to be long and difficult especially with the current situation. She would be there and be the vessel for the light.

A/N: Looks like things are going to change with Amitiel on the scene. Tag to The Vessel.