A/N: I have put the Preface, Foreword, and first chapter of the revamped SI Archives up on Fictionpress, the sister site of FFN (i.e. this site here). You can find it under Historical fiction. Log in using your FFN information (there is an option to do this), read it, and leave feedback there, please.

This is in ME/C&C fanfic category because I have yet to actually publish the Archives and is absolutely hilarious IMHO. These are far, far into the future of the SI Archives… which will purely use bland-name goods.

Preview 1: No Coincidences Here

Sometime in 2077, after the end of the Fourth Dust War

Dad says that a person's identity is determined by their sense of self, their family, and their enemy… Lia Shepard (adoptive) kicked a loose pebble along the path as she walked along it, contemplating the alien portal. Although Ancestor Kane (who had coined his own name because "Crutch"—and yes, he was the secret origin of the concept of a Crutch Character—sounded too lame) had used Northwood Studios and later EE Games to deliver forewarning to humanity regarding Dust, there were still copyright issues with retarded GDI laws, so they weren't calling the tower what everyone who was familiar with early 21st century video games knew it to be. For me that would be…

Lia, for the name Mom and Dad gave me when they rescued me…

Rats, because my whole family, including Uncle Jenkins, began as street rats during the Long Night of Solace, they survived and overthrew the depraved Christian States of America…

And of course, ONI, because the GDI Office of Naval Intelligence is still after me, even though they cannot act as boldly as they used to…

Holy bloody fucking shit.

The door slammed open. "DAD!"

John Shepard, who was dealing with signing more products for fans of that old video game series Buoyware had produced back in the day, looked up at his adopted daughter's thunderous bellow of rage. His hand closed on the pistol at his belt instinctively but managed to not draw it. Well, it was a good break from the work at least, lest his hand cramp or something… "What is it Lia?" His mother really shouldn't have let them use her and her sister's names, and then named him after their male default name just because it was convenient and a common enough first name. That would have saved him this tedious work… then again it was a lot safer than many other jobs…

"Get Ancestor Kane on the line as soon as you can. If there's a God out there somewhere… I suspect he is a Buoyware fan."

John Shepard looked down at the Buoyware merchandise he was busy signing off on "Uh… why do you say that?"

"Because the schedule for the Fourth Dust War in Ancestor Kane's fiction warning works was supposed to end in 2077, which did happen in our history, though it didn't start in that year, that's for sure." Both grimaced thinking back on it "Buoyware's main plot line based on Kane's warning starts in 2183, and a certain character in it is one hundred and six years old at that point? Dad, I'm considering heading through that gate with Ancestor Kane's lot… it'll get ONI off our backs and maybe you and Mom can consider having a kid or two, so I've been considering a new name for myself… as per the principles you laid out for me."

"So self, family, enemy, right? What does that have to do with Buoyware's coincidental numbering from the end of the Fourth Dust War for that woman's age?"

"Dad, I got LIA, RATS, ONI… I don't even have to mix and match it, just change the spaces and punctuation!"

John Shepard's face did a lot of funny twitching in mind-blown shock before he settled for staring down at a particular 109-year-old (by the end of the main series, 106 to start) blue alien's printed hug pillow which he'd just signed off on the tail end of. It was complete with a handwritten line of "I'm Confessor Shepard, and this is my favourite lover on the Citadel" as befitting his real-life rank. Though he wasn't just a Confessor anymore, it was still people's most common term for him… It took a moment before he finally spoke "…I really hope that's not an indication that you plan on doing something very wrong to me given I changed your nappies and all."

The facepalm would have been "heard" around the world had Lia not exerted tremendous psionic effort to suppress the psychic yell of frustration at her Dad's defensive response of excessive trolling.

A/N: I too was amazed by the number of coincidences that could easily arise from a Command & Conquer/Mass Effect crossover. With RATS and ONI in place, LIA was easy… mind-blowing isn't it?

This was written largely as an announcement for my Fictionpress trial release of the SI Archives for people to give critique on writing style and other such aspects on. SO GO THERE AND TAKE A LOOK (Leave a review using your FFN info to log in!)