howRon0 Ok, considering I helped Mandy write the new challenge, and I had no plans to do it this week, but Mandy BEGGED me, so here it is. This fic has nothing to do with my other challenge series. It is going to be a few parts. Please review all parts * ~Juliette

*Someone needs to say "sore wa himitsu desu" which means, "Now that's a secret" in Japanese.
*Someone's eyeball needs to itch
*It needs to rain cats and dogs...literally...
*A character needs to win 2nd place in something (go 2nd place!!)
*It must have a plot. (YOU HAVE NO CHANCE OF WINNING WITHOUT THIS!!!)
*It needs to be funny.
*Must include "Ewww.... Ron, what did you DO to my BED???"
*Must include purple underpants. ^^
*And lastly, must include a telemarketer!

The Long Story: How Ron Lost His Mojo

Prologue: Coffee Beans Didn't Keep Me Awake

Dawn was steadily approaching the Hogwarts grounds. There wasn't a mouse stirring in the castle… no, not mice; but there were two certain students who were wide-awake. But not another soul!

…Hold up! I just received an own from a certain Hermione Granger, informing me that the house elves are already up and preparing breakfast. Isn't that dandy? Thank you, Hermione!

Severus Snape was also up, sitting in his office. I discluded him earlier because he is not necessarily a living soul. (Okay, so that was just a little cruel.) Anyway… the much-hated Potions master was unable to sleep because he had just mixed a revenge potion, which had a nasty side affect of making one's eyes itch. It was a small price to pay when thinking about the utter humiliation that McGonagall was going to suffer during her classes the next day. That'll teach her!

Meanwhile… Those two students who I had previously mentioned as being awake were none other than Hermione Granger and Ronald Weasley. Of course, Ms. Granger has (so generously) already made her presence known.

What are our favorite side-kicks doing up? (a.) Fighting, (b.) studying… (c.) snogging? Unfortunately, the answer is (d.) none of the above. There were really three students lounging the Gryffindor common room: Hermione Granger, Ronald Weasley and Harry Potter. Harry is presently asleep in one of the fluffier sofas; thus, he could not be on the list of conscious beings in the castle.

This brings us back to the question of what the trio was originally doing in the common room so late, er… early? There are two correct answers: (a.) the short one, and (b.) the long one. Knowing me, your lovely narrator, (*waves*) you are going to hear the long version…