Notes : This fiction is quite sad, I prefer to warn you. It's been mostly inspired by Smoke+Mirrors album by Imagine Dragons. I wanted the Nogitsune, only S03 was giving me a hard time writing Sterek. So it's actually post-S04. No spoils, but recent rumors actually helped spoil the mood.

As Captain Fandom, I take the laughter, and I take the pain. Enjoy both.

Cissa

"Do you wanna play a game?"

The Nogitsune was smiling. He knew he shouldn't have got to bed, shouldn't have fallen asleep. Now, the fox was taking over again.

"Come on… I'm here to stay, Stiles. Better get used to it. Do you know how to play go game?"

He was definitely going crazy. His evil twin was standing before him, laughing at him and now handing him what looked like a chess board. Stiles knew better. He knew how to play, at least the basics. They were in his own head, his mind taking the shape of a blank room with nothing but the dry stump the Nemeton was. What a joke.

"Come on dude. Let's play."

Silence fell, but not for long.

"So I heard you like him."

That asshole didn't 'hear' anything. He was in his fucking head.

"Won't you talk about him? Please, Stiles. I really want to know."

"Fuck you." he said as he put another stone on the board.

"Wow, if only! Fuck you, Stiles. How long are you going to stay a virgin, huh?"

"As long as I feel like it."

"Or as long as I'll allow it. Everybody here knows who's in control, who leads the game."

"So, this is just a game to you?"

"Of course! Everything is. I'm a kitsune, remember? What we were talking about? Oh, yes. Him."

Stiles didn't answer. He didn't have to. The Nogitsune was already in his thoughts: he couldn't lie to him anyway. Why even bother to speak? He even tried not to think, to no avail.

"Stiles, Stiles…" the kitsune sighed. "You're no fun, you know? I can read your thoughts, obviously, so when you're thinking not to think so I won't be hearing your thoughts… I actually hear your thoughts anyway. You're being stupid."

"Everybody says I am, until I prove them I'm not."

"You're a special kind of stupid, that's all. The kind that seduce a mentally unstable girl just to prove himself he's not as queer as he thinks he is."

The white stone cut the air and slammed the board with a loud noise.

"Last time I checked," Stiles replied, "I was mentally ill too. I mean, I'm talking to the evil fox version of the Mad Hatter, and he's got my face. Can't say I'm sane."

"You have a gift for avoiding delicate subjects, don't you?"

Stiles smiled.

"Lots of practice."

"What if I lead you to him?"

Now it was the time for the Nogitsune to smile.

"What?"

"You're sleeping, dumbass. Your poor little body is all in my control. Actually, we're already up."

Stiles did get up and flipped the goban, scattering the stones all over the Nemeton. He tried to escape the room, only there were no doors.

"Really? Stiles, if you want to win, you gotta play."

When the teenager turned around, the go game was back there, untouched.

"You got to be kidding me…" he whispered.

"Well I'm not. Your turn." The Nogitsune smiled and then added: "If you want to see what you're actually doing, you have to play, and play well. Believe me, you don't want to miss that scene."

Stiles focused as hard as he could, and took his time to place his next stone. It seemed his move wasn't so bad, since the fox honored his word. A split second later, Stiles was facing Derek.

There were in his loft, standing up awkwardly in his livingroom. The werewolf looked tense, and not in the good way. He wasn't angry but his face was showing all kind of anxiety.

"Stiles, you're here?"

"… Yeah. I think. Mostly." Stiles answered, disoriented. "What happened?"

"The… The Nogitsune, it's you?"

Of course it's… Wait. Derek didn't have any memory of defeating the Nogitsune, simply because the Nogitsune wasn't even defeated yet! So why Stiles acted like he already knew? This was a severe temporal paradox… What the fuck was going on?

"Are you ok?" Derek asked, genuinely concerned.

"Ye…No. Not at all. Not a bit. I'm clearly not ok, the… The Nogitsune, what did he tell you?"

Derek's eyes were suddenly unreachable.

"Hmm… That's…"

"What did he tell you?" Stiles repeated.

"You… He told me… He told me… you were… into me."

"Like…?"

"That you liked me. In a definitely non-platonic way. You were… he was pretty clear about that."

Stiles' cheeks went bright red.

"Oh my God… I… He really did this?"

Derek nodded and sighed. "Come and sit down. We're on for most of the night, now."

The young man followed him to the couch where he fell down.

"Something to drink?"

"Are you really treating me like another regular guest, given the circumstances?"

"Why not?"

"The Nogitsune told you…"

"What he told me doesn't matter. It's what you tell me that's important."

Stiles felt really flattered, yet couldn't help but being suspicious.

"And how can you know it's not another of his tricks?"

"I don't. I trust you, that's all."

"You shouldn't."

Derek shrugged and asked again: "Do you want something to drink, then?"

"Hmm… only water, thanks."

The werewolf disappeared into the kitchen, letting Stiles alone in the livingroom. Well, not completely alone; the voice of the Nogitsune soon echoed in his head.

"So, he knows now. And… he doesn't mind."

Stiles tried not to listen to him. If he ignored him, maybe he'll eventually go away on his own…

"I could feel his heartbeat racing as I said the words." the Nogitsune went on.

Seemed like the mute button wasn't working well tonight.

"Just shut up…" Stiles muttered.

"He even blushed a little…!" Apparently, the fox didn't give a shit what Stiles thought. "He likes you too, Stiles."

"Please…"

"I wonder why you ran into that she-wolf arms when you had that handsome guy hanging out with you… Are you a masochist? Really. Such a waste. I think you've even broken his heart. You're aware he's actually got one, aren't you?"

"SHUT UP!"

"Stiles?"

Derek came back from the kitchen, wearing a plate with water, glasses and cookies.

"What's happening?" he asked, putting the plate onto the coffee table. "You're hearing him?"

"Yeah…" Stiles was almost crying with lassitude and fear.

"And what did he say?"

"Who cares what he said…?"

So now you're not gonna listen to me? Stiles heard in his head.

"I just want to know what he said that put you in such a condition."

"He said that you… That you liked me too."

That's my boy.

Stiles breathed as if air could sweep the evil fox away, and added: "That I broke your heart when I started dating Malia."

He was half-hoping it wasn't true, but the look into Derek's eyes suggested quite the opposite.

"Oh… I…"

"You don't have to say anything." Derek whispered.

"Yes I do. I'm sorry."

"So am I."

Well, that was awkward. Stiles just sat there, silently staring at nothing in particular.

"Are you hearing the Nogitsune again?" Derek asked once more. Maybe he wanted to change the subject, but he looked worried all the same.

"No. Just… the silence."

That's always what have been: silence. Stares and gazes lost in the air, time wasted, misunderstandings and no backing in time possible. Submerged by regret, Stiles felt like he was choking on his own bitterness. He almost thought he was about to puke. Even the fox cruel monologues were more bearable that that deep and thick nothing of a silence.

Then, Derek put a hand on his shoulder, and Stiles woke up.

Panting, the young man took a look at his bed: everything was a mess. It's been a miracle he didn't fall on the floor! It was all a dream? A nightmare? Stiles couldn't decide. He didn't like the evil fox part, but the look in Derek's eyes, his voice, his closeness… That he could had had more. Except he didn't.

It was 5am on this Thursday. Stiles couldn't get back to sleep, so he went blogging and doing nothing on the Internet before getting to school. He couldn't wait to be in college, even if that meant leaving Beacon Hills. He'd surely go to the same university as Scott, Lydia, Liam and Malia, so he wasn't really worried. He didn't know if Kira would follow them or not, but that'd be terribly cool if she went too. Then they'd come back for breaks and holidays, hanging out together again with Derek and the rest of the pack.

The day went on smoothly, except for the little embarrassment Stiles felt when greeting and hugging Malia. Was his subconscious fox right about her? About Derek? No… Impossible, that was just another weird dream, a fantasy that made sense only in his head. The reality… Malia was the reality.

When they got out of the school, Stiles was surprised to see Derek. He was there, on the parking lot, obviously waiting for the teenagers to finish their school day.

"Hi."

"Hi Derek… What's wrong?" Scott asked.

"I'd say 'nothing', but that's not true." Derek sighed, his eyes avoiding Stiles. "I'm leaving Beacon Hills."

"Wh… WHAT?" Stiles couldn't believe what he was hearing. "But, you can't!"

Derek frowned, as Scott did.

"I can and I will. I must."

"Nice combo but… Why?"

"I have some urgent business in London."

That was what EVERYBODY said, and Stiles was fed up with that lame excuse. He surely wasn't the only one.

"But… The pack needs you!"

Scott didn't say anything, letting Stiles do the talking. Maybe he shouldn't have, because it was more and more awkward. Derek looked suddenly ill-at-ease, searching for an emergency exit. As he didn't answer, Stiles walk up to him, and almost whispered:

"We need you."

Staring straight into his eyes, both of them exactly knew what 'we' really meant. And what 'need' stood for.

"I'm sorry, Stiles."

"So am I."

Derek's eyes lifted up to cast a glance at Malia, something that Stiles clearly spotted. No need to whisper this time: she'd hear it anyway. Maybe she needed to hear it.

"If I knew, things would have been different." Stiles declared.

"I did know. And I didn't do anything about it. It's my fault, not yours."

"You really have to leave?"

He was almost begging and to Derek, that was painful to hear. He just nodded and put his hands into his pockets. Everything was as it was at the beginning. Like nothing had ever changed.

Fuck that.

Something had changed. Someone.

Stiles rushed to Derek and took him in his arms, holding him tightly. He didn't want to let go.

"I'm so sorry, Stiles…"

But he was already sobbing. Derek embraced him too, stroking his back with a soft hand.

"You have to let me go." he added.

"No." was the only answer he got. "I'm not. Not this time."

"You have to let go."

"I don't want you to go."

"I don't want to go. I just don't have a choice."

Minutes that were like tiny eternities later, they eventually parted. Derek went to his car where Braeden was waiting for him, and Stiles took a step back towards Malia.

So it's how it ends. After all this, this is the end.

I think not.

Stiles turned around and ran to Derek. If he was really leaving without giving an address, he couldn't disappear just like that. Clinging to his neck, he pressed his lips on his and soon, they were kissing the hell out of each other.

Fuck what Braeden would say. Fuck what Malia would do. This was their time, their last and only time, before the void.

We gotta let go.

And our heart is beating,

And we know that we gotta

Let go... Like a bird in the snow.

This isn't a ship to sail your soul...

We can't fight the friction.