A/N: I do not own any rights to anything contained within this fic, and I have created it purely for entertainment.
Tango loved to babysit his five-year-old niece, Marissa, because she was extremely fun to hang out with, even though she could definitely keep anyone busy. She was so sweet and well behaved, though, that a little over-activeness was okay. She also loved to go on picnics and play games outside, because she said she lived for the sun; so that was why Tango found himself sitting on a sheet in the middle of Steve's back yard with a tray of snack food sitting beside him.
Marissa was sitting across from him, trying futilely to braid her doll's hair, and steadily asking Tango questions. Why do you try to hunt down dead people? Isn't that scary? Can you make the ghosts leave? Has one ever hurt you? Tango was watching her fumbling with the doll's hair and answering her questions on autopilot, almost a little half-heartedly, when she asked a much different question than the ones before.
"Uncle Dave, why do you live with Steve?"
Tango blushed a little as he answered her. "Because Steve lives closer to the TAPS office…uh work, so I started staying here when we had short breaks. And, …uh…I got tired of moving my stuff back and forth from Grandpa Bruce's house to here, so I moved in all the time with Steve last summer."
"Oh, okay, Uncle Dave."
"Why did you want to know? I thought you said you really like Steve."
"I do like Steve," Marissa said with a big smile on her face. She batted her eyelashes a few times and added, "He's handsome."
Tango laughed. "I'm gonna tell him you said that."
"Well, I don't care," she said, putting on a falsely stern look.
Tango laughed harder.
"Yeah, I do like Steve, but I asked about you living here because I heard Daddy ask Mommy about it yesterday."
Tango stopped laughing abruptly and asked, "What did your Mommy say?"
"That it was not any of Daddy's business."
Tango fidgeted uneasily as she looked at him, unable to think of what to say; but fortunately, Steve walked out the back door with a pitcher of Kool-Aid, which distracted Marissa from staring at Tango.
"Yay, grape, my favorite," Marissa squealed at Steve after noting the color of the liquid in the pitcher.
"Mine too," he answered, sitting down beside Tango.
They ate their snack food lunch then, consisting of chips, popcorn, fruit snacks, crackers, cheese strings, and chocolate chip cookies. Marissa chattered in between the bites she took about school, her friends, and the little boy that always pulled her hair, while Steve and Tango laughed and smiled in the appropriate places.
Of course, after lunch, Marissa was still just as hyped up as she was before eating, and Steve and Tango were feeling the need to take a nap in compensation for the overexertion of the morning and all of the junk they ate for lunch. As Marissa began to skip circles around them, Steve lay back on the sheet, placing his arm over his eyes and sighing loudly.
"Seriously, dude," Tango asked, a little exasperation seeping out in his voice. "You're just gonna bail on me like that?"
Steve grinned. "Well I did make the Kool-Aid."
"Dude." Tango scoffed. "You made the Kool-Aid, really? Like it was a five-course meal."
Marissa laughed and sat down between them. "You two fight like Mommy and Daddy."
Steve burst into laughter at her remark, but Tango was horrified by it, especially after the conversation he had with her earlier. He sat there mouthing words that were refusing to come out for a moment, when finally, he managed to say, "We're not fighting."
Marissa looked at him, frankly, and said, "That's what they say too."
Steve laughed even harder.
"It's so not funny," Tango hissed at Steve, hitting him on the arm with the side of his loosely curled fist.
Marissa, already finished with the conversation, leaned backwards to grab her purple purse lying beside her doll. In true five-year-old fashion, containing far too much enthusiasm, she said, "Look what I have," holding up a tube of lip-gloss. "It's strawberry flavored." She uncapped it and began to apply far too much on her lips. When she finished, she smiled at Tango, and then turned to Steve. "Now, I just need somebody to kiss."
It was Tango's turn to laugh as he realized he hadn't had the chance to tell Steve about Marissa thinking him handsome. Steve didn't laugh though; instead, he tapped his cheek, inviting Marissa to give him the kiss.
She giggled behind her hands for a second, but she leaned down to plant a wet-sounding, smacking kiss on his cheek. She smiled down at Steve for a moment, admiring the faintly pink kiss mark on his cheek, and said, "I think you need one on the other side."
"I think I do too," Steve replied.
Marissa giggled again as she uncapped the lip-gloss once more, but she didn't reapply any to her lips. Instead, she held it out to Tango. "You do it, Uncle Dave."
All of the blood fled Tango's face leaving him as white as the clouds in the sky. "Nnnno…you do it, Marissa…uh, um…it would be weird if I were to…uh, kiss Steve," he said haltingly.
"Please, Uncle Dave? Please? It's not weird! Why would it be weird?" Her voice was growing shriller with every word she spoke. "Please, Uncle Dave?"
Steve couldn't take it anymore, because he hated to see a cute little girl like Marissa disappointed. "How 'bout I do it to Uncle Dave," he asked, hoping it would appease her.
"Okay," she said, reverting to her normal voice. She thrust the lip-gloss at Steve excitedly, instructing him, "Make sure you put on enough."
Steve put on far too much lip-gloss, running it around his lips so haphazardly that some got in his stubble. "Is that enough," he asked as he handed the tube back to Marissa.
"Yes," she answered, giggling a little in delight.
Steve sat up and turned to grab Tango's head to prevent his escape, and leaned toward him with a twinkle of mischief in his eyes.
"Dude, come on," Tango said, futilely trying to pull away from Steve.
Steve kissed him on the cheek hard, and when he pulled back, there was a huge pink mark on Tango's cheek that didn't resemble lips at all.
Tango roughly pushed Steve's hands away and used his shirtsleeve to wipe the mess off his face.
"That was a good one, Steve," Marissa shouted. She jumped to her feet and hopped on the spot, because her glee at the kiss was too much to contain while sitting down. "That was a really big kiss."