Disclaimer: I own none of these characters; I just changed the names.
Enjoy, and please R&R! This story © Celebhiril 2002
The Lord of Make-up
'Twas a bright morning on the day of the council of Elefond. Birds sang in the trees of Diveindell, elves moved about gracefully, all seemed well. Yet what they discussed in the council was quite different.
'THE ONE LIP-GLOSS'
The lip-gloss was an evil thing belonging to the terrible Lord of Make-up. At the council a host of elves, dwarves, humans, blobbits and a wizard discussed the lip-gloss's fate. They knew that it must be destroyed in the make-up factories of Mt Lipstick! There was no other way to destroy it.
So it was decided that Dodo and Spam (the blobbits), Acorn and Biro (the humans), Legless the elf, Giblet the dwarf and Gondapht the wizard would go on this perilous journey across 'Slightly to the Left of the Middle Earth' to Mt Lipstick to destroy the terrible lip-gloss.
It was at this point that the blobbits Kipper and Dairy leapt out from behind a shrubbery and requested to go with the fellowship. The fellowship was reluctant because they were, to be honest, stupid blobbits and would likely hinder the fellowship. Then Kipper and Dairy delivered their famous lines for why they should go:
"You need people of intelligence on this sort of mission. quest. thing!"
"Well that rules you out Kipper!"
So, the fellowship set off. It wasn't long before they were attacked by the evil Lord's minions, the Glosswraiths, who wanted the lip-gloss to return it to their master for his use. They attacked the fellowship with make-up applying sticks, threatened them with manicures and sprayed hair spray in their eyes.
Then Acorn formed a plan. He let them manicure his nails. He screamed to let them think he was terrified and then used his sharp nails to stab them. The shiny silver nail-polish, when held at the right angle, blinded them! They gave up and decided just to go to the nearest body shop and buy their own lip-gloss - which they could have done in the first place, but anyway.
The fellowship went on through the Mines of Mohawk where they were met by a large group of nasty goblin thingies. All fought valiantly, but alas, Gondapht tripped over his beard when attacking the goblins and fell to his death in a river of what may have been deodorant. It was hard to tell, as the nasty goblin thingies obviously didn't use any! His pointy hat still floated atop the river.
So a saddened fellowship defeated the goblins and went on and finally, after many months, the fellowship, minus Gondapht, came to Mt Lipstick. They fought their way though hair and beauty salons and at last came to the great furnace where the lip-gloss would be destroyed.
Just as Dodo was about to toss the lip-gloss into the furnace the Lord of Make-up himself appeared, sword in hand. He began to fight the eight. Biro went down, leaking blue ink everywhere.
The evil Lord was very strong. In a short time he had injured all but Acorn, who remained fighting. While Acorn fought the evil Lord, Dodo pulled himself off the floor, crept up behind the dark Lord and felled him with his sword.
The Lord of Make-up was defeated, but just before he died he spoke to Dodo: "There is so something you must know: I am your father!" He then fell limp.
Dodo was shocked, but he decided must think about it after, because now he must destroy the lip-gloss. He hesitated for one moment; he could use it himself - but no, he mustn't! So he tossed the lip-gloss into the furnace, and evil was destroyed forever.
Or was it? .
The Lord of Make-up
'Twas a bright morning on the day of the council of Elefond. Birds sang in the trees of Diveindell, elves moved about gracefully, all seemed well. Yet what they discussed in the council was quite different.
'THE ONE LIP-GLOSS'
The lip-gloss was an evil thing belonging to the terrible Lord of Make-up. At the council a host of elves, dwarves, humans, blobbits and a wizard discussed the lip-gloss's fate. They knew that it must be destroyed in the make-up factories of Mt Lipstick! There was no other way to destroy it.
So it was decided that Dodo and Spam (the blobbits), Acorn and Biro (the humans), Legless the elf, Giblet the dwarf and Gondapht the wizard would go on this perilous journey across 'Slightly to the Left of the Middle Earth' to Mt Lipstick to destroy the terrible lip-gloss.
It was at this point that the blobbits Kipper and Dairy leapt out from behind a shrubbery and requested to go with the fellowship. The fellowship was reluctant because they were, to be honest, stupid blobbits and would likely hinder the fellowship. Then Kipper and Dairy delivered their famous lines for why they should go:
"You need people of intelligence on this sort of mission. quest. thing!"
"Well that rules you out Kipper!"
So, the fellowship set off. It wasn't long before they were attacked by the evil Lord's minions, the Glosswraiths, who wanted the lip-gloss to return it to their master for his use. They attacked the fellowship with make-up applying sticks, threatened them with manicures and sprayed hair spray in their eyes.
Then Acorn formed a plan. He let them manicure his nails. He screamed to let them think he was terrified and then used his sharp nails to stab them. The shiny silver nail-polish, when held at the right angle, blinded them! They gave up and decided just to go to the nearest body shop and buy their own lip-gloss - which they could have done in the first place, but anyway.
The fellowship went on through the Mines of Mohawk where they were met by a large group of nasty goblin thingies. All fought valiantly, but alas, Gondapht tripped over his beard when attacking the goblins and fell to his death in a river of what may have been deodorant. It was hard to tell, as the nasty goblin thingies obviously didn't use any! His pointy hat still floated atop the river.
So a saddened fellowship defeated the goblins and went on and finally, after many months, the fellowship, minus Gondapht, came to Mt Lipstick. They fought their way though hair and beauty salons and at last came to the great furnace where the lip-gloss would be destroyed.
Just as Dodo was about to toss the lip-gloss into the furnace the Lord of Make-up himself appeared, sword in hand. He began to fight the eight. Biro went down, leaking blue ink everywhere.
The evil Lord was very strong. In a short time he had injured all but Acorn, who remained fighting. While Acorn fought the evil Lord, Dodo pulled himself off the floor, crept up behind the dark Lord and felled him with his sword.
The Lord of Make-up was defeated, but just before he died he spoke to Dodo: "There is so something you must know: I am your father!" He then fell limp.
Dodo was shocked, but he decided must think about it after, because now he must destroy the lip-gloss. He hesitated for one moment; he could use it himself - but no, he mustn't! So he tossed the lip-gloss into the furnace, and evil was destroyed forever.
Or was it? .