Title: A Faded Memory

Author: Devlyne (Originally published as BelleAngeli)

Published: 07-20-03 (Re-Post 9/15/2015)

Disclaimer: I do not own Labyrinth, Jareth or Sarah. Nor do I in any way resemble Jim Henson, The Jim Henson Company, Henson Creature Shop or Disney.

A/N: Revision Completed 9/15/2015.

Chapter 1: Dreams Die Hard

Dreams of childhood fade and we often wonder if they were only mere fancies of our imaginations. It is how every adult has found it and so how Sarah found it. She often sat alone in her apartment considering this. It was a beautiful apartment decorated in the most modern decor that she could afford. The well placed paintings, tables and chairs were all part of who Sarah was now. This was not who she'd meant to be, of course. Does anyone ever become who they mean to be as a child? All her little curios and past mementos were put away, much like her childhood hopes and dreams. Well, almost all. There was one room in the apartment which was her special place. She hadn't been able to afford storage for all her treasures when she'd moved out last year. And Carin had made it quite clear that Sarah might return at a later time to find her things gone if she left them.

Instead of burying her treasures away, Sarah had used them to decorate the room. The name had an ominous ring to it even to her; "The Room". It sounded like the plot to a fairy tale with an evil king torturing a hapless hero. As soon as the thought had crossed Sarah's mind, she felt the laughter bubble up. Laughter didn't come easy these days, but nothing came easy any more. The Room was a plain room made prettier by the fact that its windows caught the rising sun. She'd edged the windows with a filmy material that allowed the light in while obscuring the view. Afterward, the decorating had begun and the room now looked more like a nursery than a spare bedroom. There were shelves lining two of the walls with books and knickknacks of every nature. All Sarah's old stuffed animals and toys had found a home on the bed or on the shelves among the knickknacks. Now the only remaining decoration was a child to enjoy the comforts of the room as Sarah once had.

Sometimes Sarah would come with a book and lay there reading in a dancing pool of sunlight. An old lamp with hanging shards of crystal that sat on a table near the window would catch the sun and send rainbows dancing across the room. She'd sit and watch it for hours until the rainbows finally faded. It always left her heart light and easy with the beauty of it. Sarah always struggled with the part of her wanted to get up to dance with the rainbows and twirl about. She had danced once or twice at first. Now, she was happy to sit there smiling at it all and remembering. There were times she would come in here just to lie on the rug and stroke the soft material for hours on end. That was a time when she could drift away in to her thoughts and dreams without being interrupted.

Those were the good moments; there were always going to be good moments. She thrived on those few moments of uninterrupted peace and quiet. Of course, there were also bad moments and they were almost as many as the good moments. Sarah found herself in the same routine of rising, going to work, going out with friends and coming home. But what was it she came home to? Right now it was an empty apartment with empty hallways. She'd almost considered getting a cat or another animal to keep her company but in the end had decided not to. The thought of an animal demanding food and shedding all over her house set her teeth on edge. Oh, she'd learned all about that perfectionist sort of cleanliness from Carin. That had been a lesson somewhat worth unlearning. The moment Sarah had freedom to toss her clothes and things any which way, she'd done so.

That freedom had faded quickly and a fastidious need to keep everything in order had returned. Gone were the days of piles of clothes on the floor and the dishes in her kitchen sink. There would be whole days spent cleaning the apartment from top to bottom. The windows opened to allow fresh air and sunlight in. Fresh air? Not really, it was a city and there was little fresh air to be had. There were gaseous fumes and odd putrid odors that permeated the air when it was hot. Day or night, she could hear cars passed while honking their horns or speeding to their destination. Sarah could pretend it was the fresh air of the country at least. She remembered what that had smelled like. It had smelled sweet, full of the scent of flowers with the warmth of the sun on her back and face as she looked up at the sky. Her green-grey eyes closed a moment as she treasured that remembered sensation.

Those memories designed to lift Sarah's spirits only seemed to lower her deeper in to the darkness. She looked about the apartment wanting something more. There was no perfect life to be had. Why then did hers seem so much less than perfect? There were times when she'd stood before the oil paintings at the museum and tried to compare her life to one. All those dark, drab little colors swirled together to create a complete picture. That felt like a very accurate description of the life she lived in the city. And then Sarah would see a brighter painting and couldn't help but walk away with that light feeling returning to her heart.

A familiar face flashed through the mirror before her and that put a slow smile on her lips. "Alright, alright, he is handsome and he is waiting . . . I'm going already ..." He was Christopher Damien, a local up and coming lawyer. He had the good looks and talent that most women were looking for and few could find. Once, when they'd first met, Sarah had almost believed he'd had the dreamer in him too. It was something she could see in his eyes at times. Something in the way he smiled and would gaze at her. It was not love at first sight. Sarah had stopped believing in that a long time ago, but there was the tiniest spark between them. Maybe not love at first sight, but Sarah thought it was love nonetheless. And if her friends happened to think he might propose soon then who could blame her for sharing that hope.

Another face replaced Sarah's reflection in the mirror before vanishing. She hadn't quite caught a glimpse of it and thought perhaps it was memories of Chris once more. His lips against hers were soft and sweet. His strong hand holding hers and letting their fingers entwined. Dreamy almost star-crossed looks drifted over her as she let her chin come to rest on one hand a moment and indulged in the memories. Maybe it would be tonight? He had said there was something special he wanted to talk about tonight. Could this be it? That smile returned as bright as ever, but there were cold fingers of dread creeping up her spine. The world felt very wrong and tilted on its axis for a moment before Sarah shook the cold away. There it was again, that shade of a face in the mirror before her.

Turn back, Sarah, turn back before it's too late.

Oh! Clenched fists pressed to her eyes as Sarah tried to drive away the scene emerging in her head. She'd spent so long trying to forget that dream but it always returned when her guard was down. The left-hand drawer of her dresser opened so she could dig out the orange pill bottle hidden there. One small white pill drawn out and a quick dry swallow disposed of it before the doorbell rang twice. That should be Chris. Sarah headed for the door already forgetting about the bottle on her dresser. She didn't see as it tipped over spilling its contents here and there. Nor did Sarah see that face return in her mirror to gaze sadly at the pills scattered over her dresser.

Her smile was already in place as she pulled the door open for Chris and stood back so he could admire her. "Sorry I'm late, Sar- Anyone ever told you you're beautiful?" The tall, young man stood there smiling and looking her over before offering his arm. Sarah could hardly help the blush that rose to her cheeks. She pulled her jacket on without waiting for his help and took the offered arm. If she hesitated a moment to listen for the faint click of her door lock, Chris didn't comment on it. It was just another one of Sarah's quirks and that was part of what he liked about her, wasn't it?

"So, where are we going tonight?" Their voices trailed off down the hallway as they headed for the elevator. The lanky blond figure didn't need to hear the rest of what was said. His fingertips moved over the edge of the dresser while blue eyes took in the pills spread there. How far his Sarah had fallen; he would have to do something about that. But what? A slow smile widened the man's lips as the wheels in his head slowly began to turn; yes, what indeed?