A/N: Takes place post-IA investigation, somewhere in the middle of Season 7.
This one's been in the works for quite a while. Hang onto the emotional rollercoaster folks. Here we go!
"You're going where?" The words he'd just said replayed themselves over and over in her brain because they didn't make any sense. He couldn't possibly be going. Not there.
"Kensi, babe, it's okay. Take a breath," Deeks said calmly from where he leaned against the counter.
"Afghanistan, Deeks? Afghanistan? You can't go to Afghanistan!" she cried.
"Kensi, I don't have a choice. Sam's going too. Orders from Hetty."
"No," Kensi shook her head and folded her arms tightly over her chest. "No it should be Callen. Callen can go instead."
"Babe, you know that's not how it works," he watched her pace back and forth across the floor of the Burn Room. "They need someone from LAPD on the ground over there. I'm the obvious choice. It's only for a couple months."
"A couple months," Kensi ceased her frantic movements to stare at him, her eyes flashing with anger. "Deeks, over there that's like two years. It's a warzone. You're only LAPD, they can't make you do this."
"Kensi," he ran a hand through his hair, "they're not making me." He shrugged. "I want to go."
"You….what? You want…."Kensi stared at him, completely at a loss for words.
"You and Sam and Callen, you've all done your part saving the world. Now it's my turn. It's just…something I have to do," he told her.
She continued to stare, her face a mask of horror and disbelief.
"It's going to be okay," he stepped closer, stretching out a hand to take hers. "I'll be fine."
"No, no! Don't…don't touch me," she pushed him away. "I can't…no. This is not happening. No. I'm going to talk to Hetty."
She shoved past him, out of the Burn Room, down the hall. Not seeing Hetty at her desk she marched up the stairs to Ops. The doors slid open to reveal Eric and Nell their sad eyes informing her that they had already heard the news.
"Where's Hetty?" she asked, her voice barely under control.
"Kensi, I'm so sorry…" Nell began.
"Just…" Kensi swallowed and tried not to yell at her friends, "tell me where Hetty is."
"I'm right here Ms. Blye." Their diminutive boss entered the room followed closely by Callen and Sam. "Say what you need to say."
"You cannot send Deeks over there," Kensi told her flatly. "It will crush him."
"Mr. Deeks readily accepted the mission," Hetty told her. "There's no one more qualified for this particular task."
"This particular task? And what exactly is that task?" Kensi asked.
"I'm afraid that's classified."
"Oh, like the White Ghost mission was classified? Are you going to classify all the pertinent information on this case too? Because the last time you did that I ended up a Taliban hostage."
Hetty huffed. "You are out of line Ms. Blye. Mr. Deeks is going at the request of LAPD and that is final."
"Fine. Then if Deeks is going, I'm going with him."
"I'm afraid that's out of the question. You and Mr. Callen are needed here to keep up daily operations."
"Then he is not going," Kensi said firmly.
"That is not your decision to make. Now I suggest you leave this room before you say something you'll regret," Hetty replied.
Kensi looked to Sam and Callen. "Do either of you have anything you'd like to say here?"
"Deeks is a good detective Kensi. This is just part of the job," Callen said quietly.
She turned her gaze to Sam. "And you? You think this is a good idea too."
He shook his head. "It's not my call to make."
Kensi bit her lip and nodded slowly. "Right. Great. Thanks for the help guys." She turned to Hetty. "I'm filing a formal complaint."
"As is your prerogative," Hetty told her. "Goodnight Ms. Blye."
Kensi closed the kitchen cabinet hard before slamming two bowls onto the counter. She then turned and yanked open the fridge. Peering inside, unable to find what she was looking for, she shoved it closed so firmly it rattled.
"Are we going to talk about this?" Deeks was leaning against the door jam, arms folded across his chest.
Kensi reached for the bowls and walked them to the table. "What's there to talk about?" she asked. "We don't need to talk. You can just make all your decisions without me."
"Kensi…"
"It's fine Deeks. You and Sam just go off, have your little adventure."
Deeks sighed. "It's not an adventure! It's an Op! You're acting like I decided to go on vacation without your or something!"
Kensi reached for the cutting board and started chopping a cucumber. "I just don't understand your sudden need to go put yourself on active duty with no training whatsoever."
"No training? I'm sorry, are you questioning my abilities as a detective?" he asked incredulously. "Because my record is nearly impeccable, both at LAPD and at NCIS, which you know because we have been partners for six years now. Unless that's someone else's ass that I've been backing up all this time," he finished angrily.
"That's not what I meant and you know it," Kensi shot back.
"Then what exactly did you mean?" he questioned. "Because it sounds like maybe I should just go back to LAPD since I'm apparently not qualified to handle your very dangerous job."
"Why are you so fixated on this? You know you have no field training for something like this. You're not a freakin' Navy SEAL Deeks!"
"Oh, so that makes me weak? I should just leave all the big boy work to you and Sam and, and, and Callen?" he threw his hands up into the air in frustration.
"Does this have something to do with all the whole IA thing? Because you know that you have nothing to prove to anyone."
"Well apparently I do since you don't think I'm capable of actually doing my job."
"Deeks! That's not what I said! I just don't think there's any reason for you to be doing it halfway across the world when there are other people with more training."
"Right, because it's not like I've ever been to Afghanistan before. Oh wait."
"Do not even go there right now, this is not the same thing!"
"You're right! This time I have a mission, parameters, time to prepare."
"Sixteen hours is not—ouch!" Kensi jerked her hand back from the cutting board, blood welling up from a gash in her finger.
"Are you okay?" Deeks asked.
"Yes, I'm fine," she replied through gritted teeth.
"Let me see," Deeks reached for her hand.
"No, it's fine." Tears welled up in her eyes and she used her good hand to brush them away. "Just…I'm just not hungry anymore."
She walked into the master bath, searching the cabinets for antiseptic and bandages, tears blurring her vision.
She sank down onto the edge of the tub attempting to open the tube of Neosporin with one hand. The door to the bathroom opened and Deeks entered. Wordlessly he took the medicine from her and began doctoring her wound. "It's not too deep," he said quietly, once he'd cleaned it. "Shouldn't need stitches."
"Great," Kensi looked up at the ceiling in an attempt to force her tears away.
Deeks wrapped up her finger and then released her hand. "Kensi…"
"You know what, I'm really tired Deeks," she interrupted, her voice shaky. "I can't do this anymore. I'm going to bed."
Deeks sighed and ran a hand over his face. "Okay. Fine."
They shared the same bed that night, but it couldn't have been colder.
A/N: Leave your love in the reviews!