WHO IS LESS AFRAID
A 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer' story by P. J. Dickinson
Disclaimer: If you recognize any names and places then you can be sure that they were created and are owned by Joss Whedon. And fair play to him. Everything else comes from me so now you know whom to blame.
Note: This is a Xander story taking place in the last five minutes of the season three show 'The Zeppo". Its one of my favorite episodes but I realized that its ending can be interpreted in a different way. This is my take on what sort of man the Harris' eldest is. And please remember, he has just lost his virginity and it is Xander.
So remember buckos 'Be home before Dark'.
ONE
00:12
00:11
00:10
'You see Jack, it's all about fear.'
Xander's heart was thundering in his chest. How could deadbutt not see that he was scared out of his mind? The digital display of the bombs detonator slipped down into single figures. It seemed to pause for an age as it changed from the tens, probably just as the eye adjusted, then all too soon its original pace was resumed.
00:09
00:08
00:07
Come on Jack. Come on you asshole don't make me do this. Xander steadied himself and forced his mouth into the driest of grins. His mind was made up. He was going to see this through to the end. "You're going to die" gibbered the chimp inside. This was it. Giles was right. He should have stayed out of this; stayed to the back of the fight like he had been told. On Jack's dead forehead sweat began to flow. His hands played with the bullet holes under his T-shirt. He looked to the unusually implacable Xander, then to the emergency exit, then to the little wires on the bomb and back to Xander. His eyes had the agitated quality of a cornered rodent calculating probabilities.
00:06
00:05
00:04
He was winning. For the first and probably the last time in his life Xander Harris was actually winning. Jack was cracking. It was just a pity that it would be too late. Xander felt himself relax as oblivion approached one glowing second at a time. This was so stupid, to get killed out of pride and sheer bloody mindedness. At least if there was enough of him left to identify it might look like he was doing the heroic thing: sacrificing his life to save his friends and the school.
00:03
Aw balls. Who was he kidding? It would just look like he and Jack had been in it together. Blowing up the school for the yah-yahs while at a loose end on a weeknight. Damn it! His bluff was going to get called. Jack was going to take it all the way. Damn it! Damn it! Damn it all!!!
00:02
To Hell with it. He welcomed death. At least there would be an end to this miserable excuse for an existence that he jokingly called a life. No more embarrassment, awkwardness and rejection. No more lashings from the tongue of Cordelia Chase. No more unrequited lusting after Buffy. An end to not understanding what Giles was talking about all the time. And an end to the constant beatings at the hands, talons and tentacles of a legion of monsters. This last thought brought a most pleasing prospect to mind; an end to the abusive dinking and fighting of his parents. Yay. A definite upside. He would miss Willow and that was it. Here it came.
00:01
Jack reached down and plucked the blue wire from the detonator. The timer ceased its countdown.
………. !
Oh. OH! He was still alive. Oh right. He wasn't going to die. Cool. He nodded his head as he came to terms with the realization. It took a few more nods for him to process this information. He was in control of the situation.
'Good boy.' He was surprised by how steady his voice was. He didn't feel the need to cringe at his usual squawk. It wasn't there.
Jack was sprawled over the bomb, his head in his hands. He had been outclassed. He was beaten. Xander was suddenly absolutely furious.
This asshole had been ready to kill them both. He had been ready to die and for what? Xander was suddenly aware that he was bigger than Jack. He moved around the bomb and loomed over him. He was enraged; all he wanted to do was pummel Jacks face into a nasty paste. His arms twitched and his fists clenched and unclenched as he stared down at the knife-wielding chickendick under his nose. There were a million things he wanted to say right then but none would have made Willow any prouder of him. Thinking of her caused his wrath to subside as quickly as it had risen. He was better than this prick.
'I don't think I want to be seeing you round school any more Jack.' With that Xander turned and left the boiler room closing the door quietly behind him.
He stood in the stairwell and caught his breath. It was over. Jack could reattach the wire and resume the countdown but somehow Xander didn't think that was going to happen. So what was he going to do now? Faith's naked breasts bouncing up and down flashed across his mind. No, no, no, no. Concentrate.
With head hung low in a combination of exhaustion and feeling dirty-good about himself he climbed the stairs up to the main hall. From below came the sound of crashing and someone having a bad time. Probably Jack throwing a tantrum he thought as he dragged his heels in search of carbonated refreshment in the shadowy corridors of Sunnydale High.