Billy Best Takes a Wife...
"I'm just not sure this is the best plan. I know you want Little Joe to gain experience in dealing with men in San Francisco, but he's only sixteen years old." Adam had been trying to talk some sense into father for the last hour.
"Pa, tell Adam to mind his own business!" Joe was furious that his big brother always interfered in his plans.
"Stop. Both of you. Adam, I believe that Little Joe has grown up this year and is perfectly capable of delivering this letter to Mr. Stewart for me." Ben cupped the back of Joe's head, "You are going to do just fine." Joe smiled at his father with a look of happiness.
"Thanks, Pa." Joe ran upstairs taking the steps two at a time. While Adam dropped his eyes...with a 'just wait' look.
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"Now, Joe, you wire me if there are any problems." Ben watched his young son who was looking down the Virginia City street at a girl. Was he making a mistake to send Joe? After all, Adam and Hoss had the same responsibility at the same age and they had did a fine job. "Joseph!"
Joe turned back from watching the pretty young lady boarding the stage. "Sorry, Pa. I will do everything right, you'll see Pa, you can trust me." Joe stood with his hat in hand eager to leave town to be on his own.
"I'm sure I can. Goodbye, son. Be careful and have a good time." He watched Little Joe board the stage sitting next to the young lady, he couldn't help but sigh, oh to be young again. Ben waved as the stage rolled out of town, he hoped that Adam would not be able to say, "I told you so."
Joe nervously sat beside the young lady in the coach. He was getting ready to speak when the lady picked up the book Joe had laid down.
"Billy Best! I love the Billy Best books. Have you read all of them?"
"Yes." The nervousness slipped away as they tore apart the Billy Best character. Each had their own special passages and quotes.
"Oh, I wish I knew Billy Best. He is so romantic and handsome." The wistful words played on Little Joe like a fiddle. Little Joe started to say he was Billy Best when he remembered his last session over his Pa's knee. Would it be worth it? Pa had told him never to pretend to be Billy again. But, who would know? After all, he would never meet this girl again after they got off the stagecoach.
"Well, I'm in disguise because of my readers...but I'm Billy Best." The words hung in the air as if they were blasphemous. He could almost hear his Pa yelling from the Ponderosa.
"You mean you're "The Billy Best" from the Billy Best books?" The young innocent lady gazed at Joe like he was the most handsome man in the world.
"That's right." Joe puffed his chest and blinked his eyes. He knew from his girl friends that he had beautiful black eyelashes. "I'm on a business trip." Joe tried to sound important.
"Are you writing another book? " The tiny blonde with big blue eyes was making Joe feel all the things a young man shouldn't be feeling so early in the morning.
The stagecoach hit a bump making the two fall into each other arms. "Are you all right?"
"Yes, thank you." The blonde hugged Joe while scooting just a bit closer. "I'm going home, I've been on a long vacation. I would love to have you call on me." She whispered softly in his ear.
"I would like that." Joe laid on the charm while telling the biggest white lies he could. This was going to be a fun trip. Sure he had to take a letter to Mr. Stewart for his Pa, but there was no reason he couldn't pretend being Billy Best again. What Ben Cartwright didn't know wouldn't hurt him...or his backside.
At sixteen Joe had finally matured...he was a man. Pa was letting him carry a gun and he had shot at outlaws and been beaten up twice. That proved that he could hold his own. The persona of Billy Best was just cream on the top. Joe's short memory about his last episode of being Billy Best slid off his back, this time it would be different.
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Adam had settled down for a nice long rest with the San Francisco newspaper when an article caught his eye. "Billy Best marries Eliza Sutton." A cold chill ran down Adam's back as he looked up at his father then back to the paper. "Mr. Billy Best of the famed Billy Best books married the heiress of the Sutton Timber Empire, today. They had only been acquainted a short time when the young couple eloped to be married. Eliza's father, Jonathan Sutton, with pride made the announcement to the newspaper. The couple will be making their home in San Francisco. A new Billy Best book will out be soon.
Adam was stunned, it couldn't be Little Joe, it had to be a coincidence. "Uh...Pa." Adam cleared his throat, then tried again, "Pa...when is Little Joe expected home?"
"Next week, Adam. I told him he could have three weeks for his trip." Ben sipped his hot coffee slowly, then sat down in his red chair.
"I see." Taking courage in hand Adam tried again. "Have you heard from Little Joe at all?"
"No. I told him to send me a wire if there was any trouble."
"I'm not sure but I think he might need us." Adam's eyes widened as he read the newspaper.
Ben lowered the cup of coffee at the tone of Adam's voice. "What's the matter?" A sinking feeling settled in his stomach as he noticed the San Francisco paper in his son's hand. "Is there something in there about Little Joe?"
"No, not Little Joe." Adam was almost afraid of mentioning the name Billy Best. "It seems that..."
"Well, what? Is Joseph in trouble?" Ben leaned forward his heart beating very quickly.
"NO...it only says that ...Billy Best married Eliza Sutton in an elopement a week ago." Adam was almost whispering as he finished the sentence. Ben had turned red in the face with a look of horror on his face. "Now, Pa, we don't if this is Little Joe. It could be anyone pretending to be Billy Best." Ben sat as if turned to stone, he knew he had to breathe but he wasn't sure if was going to be any time soon.
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Billy Best and Eliza Best were now residing in the Sutton mansion on Nob Hill. Billy...also known as Joe Cartwright, wasn't sure how all this had happened. He had taken Eliza out to dinner several times then before he knew it, he was up to his ears in lies. One led to another then Eliza had declared her undying love for him, so of course, he told her he loved her. Then before that could settle Eliza had them before a preacher being married. Joe felt as if a whirlwind had taken over his life. Billy Best was married to a girl with millions of dollars, a famous family, and a very rich father who would murder him if he found out the truth.
A week of trying to keep at bay from his wife's advances was enough to exhaust anyone. She kept asking him if he was better yet, but he kept making excuses that he was still under a doctors' care and had to wait to consummate the marriage. Not that he didn't want too, but he wondered if his Pa would understand?
"Darling, are you going to get ready? We have to be at the Henderson's reception in an hour. I'm so happy that Dee Dee is getting married at the same time we have. She's lucky to marry Eddie Drake, isn't she? He's very handsome and distinguished." His wife could talk for hours and never repeat a single sentence on any subject. Eliza ran over to kiss Joe deeply on the lips letting her body linger next to him, maybe Billy only needed...encouragement. Joe held his beautiful wife in his arms...he longed to..."
"Billy, hurry!" Eliza broke away going through the bedroom door that connected her room to Joe's. Joe sat down on the bed holding his head in his hands...he couldn't hold out much longer, his Pa would just have to understand his dilemma. Eliza walked back to the door looking into Joe's bedroom. "Did you see how Bertie Small was looking at me?"
"Yes and he better put his eyes back in his head." Joe said firmly, how dare that little pipsqueak look at his wife like that. Of course, she wasn't really his wife in the bibical sense, yet.
He cringed when he remembered his wedding night. There was his beautiful Eliza dressed in a pink nightie sitting in the big double bed waiting for him. He knew exactly what to do but the image of his father kept appearing in his mind...that was enough to make him hesitate. Joe went over to the bed and sat down on the corner, "Eliza, I have to talk to you."
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The Cartwright's arrived in San Francisco four days later. They were tired and weary but they had made the trip in record time. Staying at their favorite hotel they had immediately unpacked, changed their clothes and arrived on the doorstep of the Sutton Mansion. "Hello, we were wanting to speak with Joe.'..."
"Billy Best." Adam interrupted.
"I'm sorry but Mrs. Best are out for the evening. Would you like to speak to Mr. or Mrs. Sutton?" The maid showed them to the parlor to wait. Adam, Ben and Hoss sat down on the chair's looking at the elegant style of the home. Ben was wondering how to tell Mr. Sutton about his son's latest escapade. If he had a daughter he would want to imprison the fool hardy young man that did this deed to his family, there was no reason to believe that Mr. Sutton wouldn't do the same thing.
"Mr. Cartwright?" John Sutton entered to the room to see the three Cartwright men. He, of course, had heard all about the Ponderosa in Nevada. The men were legends of the West. And rich, timber rich. "What can I do for you?"
"Mr. Sutton?" Ben held his hand out firmly shaking Mr. Sutton's hand. "These are my son's, Adam and Hoss."
"How do you do." John pointed to the sofa's in the room so they could be more comfortable. "I'm very glad to meet you, I have longed to talk to you for a long time about your timber operation."
"I also. I believe we could come to an understanding on our timber leases. But...I have another matter to discuss with you."
"Yes?" John waited he could feel the tension in the room almost vibrating off the walls.
"I was hoping to speak to...your son in law, Billy Best." Ben could barely utter the words.
"Billy? I believe Billy and Eliza are at a party but as soon as they come in I will give him a message. Are you a friend of Billy's?"
"You could say that." Adam muttered quietly. Ben bit his lip he didn't need Adam's sarcasm at the moment.
"Yes. Could you ask Billy if he would meet us tomorrow morning at ten at the McCathey Hotel." Ben shook Mr. Sutton's hand then tried to feel his way through the conversation, trying to understand Sutton's personality. Just wait until he got his hands on his son.
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Billy and Eliza arrived home about two o'clock in the morning. Both had drunk more that usual. Tonight Joe was going to make Eliza his wife. His father would get over it eventually. They were laughing as they entered the house but the maid handed Joe a message. "Who wrote the note?" Eliza asked.
"It's from your father." Joe opened the note reading quickly then thought he was going to be sick. "I have an early appointment in the morning."
"Oh, Billy, not tomorrow!" Eliza pouted, she had given the waiter money to ply Billy with alcohol all night. "Darling, surely you can go out later?" Eliza kissed Joe sweetly on the lips letting her hands linger on his waist. Joe pulled away reluctantly.
"No...no I have to leave by nine." What was he going to do ? Or, what was his Pa doing to do? Could he run away? Would they find him if he escaped on a steamer to the Hawaii Islands? He walked Eliza to her room, then went to his bedroom, sat down on the bed trembling in fear...he could just see his father's face when he was angry...he would be more angry than the time he pretended to be an outlaw...or the time he had played a trick on Miss Jones. Joe fell back on the bed...what was he going to do?
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The Cartwright's entered the sitting room of their suite letting out sighs. They knew that tomorrow was going to be a hard day but they had to save Little Joe somehow. At least that was what Hoss was thinking.
"Pa, there is only one thing to do." Adam sat down in the chair putting his head back against the cushions.
"Oh? And what is that, Adam? If this is another one of your plans, I'm really not in the mood." Ben sniped back at his oldest son.
"You don't have to take my advice, Pa." Adam lips thinned in anger.
"I'm sorry. Tell me about it." Ben collapsed on the sofa. "I can pay off Sutton if I have too. Maybe timber contracts..." Ben sat in deep thought, wondering how much this last little escapade of Little Joe's was going to cost the Ponderosa. "What is your idea?"
"We kill him."
The words were dropped into silence then Hoss jumped off the bed, grabbed his gun aiming at his brother, Adam. "No one is goin' to kill Little Joe."
"Hoss! Your brother was just kidding!" Ben's voice roared in the room.
"That true, Adam?" Hoss looked into his brother's eyes...you never knew what he was talkin' about.
"No." The one word sealed the deal for Ben.
Ben turned to Adam with a small smile. "I think I understand."
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Joe's nerve almost failed him the next morning. He had been up all night worrying about his father. What could his Pa do? Well, he could whip him but he would recover from that. What else? Make him stay on the ranch for the next five years? That would be hard with all his work. Joe pulled his shoulders back then knocked on the hotel suite door.
"Come in." Ben's deep voice made Joe's heart skip a beat. He opened the door taking a lone step inside.
"Pa?" The word squeaked out of Joe, he could feel the sweat running off his face. His father was alone in the room, that meant that Adam and Hoss were either putting their ear to the wall...or had taken themselves off so they wouldn't have to listen to him yell if his father felt it necessary.
"Joseph, sit down." The soft words had Joe sitting immediately. "Would you like to tell me how you ended up in this mess?"
"Pa, it was an accident." Joe waited to see if his father believed that.
"Really, how does an accident happen using the name of Billy Best?" The silky words were an indicator of his father's temper.
"Pa, it was all Eliza's fault."
"You are blaming the poor girl you married pretending to be Billy Best? " Ben was astounded. Little Joe never ceased to amaze him.
"Yes..." the word came out a little weaker. "She started talking on the stage about Billy Best..."
"Out of the blue? Why would she have done that?"
"She happened to be reading a Billy Best book. So, naturally we started talking about him and one thing led to another and she was so excited and I wanted to impress her so I mentioned I was Billy Best. I didn't mean too Pa...you have to believe that...it was just an accident."
"Joseph, I guess the main question is... have you..." Ben didn't know how to say this to a young boy, but when needed the Cartwright backbone surfaced..."did you have relations with that girl?'
"Pa! I wouldn't ever do that!" Joe said in a shocked voice that held just the right note of innocence.
"Thank God." Ben sat down staring at his youngest son wondering if he should have sent him away to a private school. "How did you...I mean you have been married for weeks?"
"Well, Pa...I told her I hurt my back." Joe looked like he should have been congratulated on thinking up this plan. "So, of course we couldn't...uh...you know.'
"I see." Ben never knew that Joe was so clear thinking.
"Yes, remember Doc Martin talking about Old Ned? That gave me the idea. It's a good thing I pay such close attention to people's conversations.
"That was a private conversation Joe after you had went to bed if I remember correctly." The stern words had Joe wilting all over again.
"Oh...yeah."
"Today, you are going back to the Sutton's home telling them you are going with us to hunt. Billy Best was supposedly a great hunter, right?" At Little Joe's nod he continued..." You will have an accident."
"Accident? What kind of accident?" Joe paled at the thought.
"Billy Best drowns in the river. His body gets swept down stream and is lost forever." The words hung in the air as Ben noticed that Joe looked like he was going to faint. "JOE!" Ben caught his son's limp body in his arms. "Adam! Hoss! Come in here!"
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Joe walked home to the Sutton house. He had finally recovered with a sip of whiskey that Adam had given him. His family impressed on him that he would never speak to Eliza again. She had to believe he had died then Joe Cartwright could return home.
That night at supper Little Joe only picked at his food, the stress of leaving the next day taking a toll on him. "Mr. Sutton, I want to thank you for taking me into your home so graciously." At Sutton's look of inquiry, Joe continued, "You too Mrs. Sutton. It's been an honor to know you." Mrs. Sutton smiled at her new son in law, he was a very handsome congenial young man.
" We love you too, Billy." Mrs .Sutton said softly.
"Tomorrow, I'm going out with the Cartwright's to hunt. I will probably be gone quite a while."
"Billy, we were going to the Dexter's party!" Eliza said sharply. "You can tell the Cartwright's you're busy."
"Oh...I have to go..." at Eliza's look of hurt..."I mean I have business to discuss with them. Mr. Sutton you understand business, right?"
"Of course, son. Eliza be a big girl and let your husband make you money." Eliza gave her father a dirty look but didn't say anything else. Dinner was soon over and the young couple walked upstairs.
"Eliza, can I talk to you for a minute?" Eliza felt like slamming her door and going to bed but Billy's sweet voice had her entering Billy's room with him.
"What do you want to say?" Eliza sat down on the edge of the bed.
Little Joe sat down beside her taking her hand in his. "Eliza, I want you to know I really like...love you. You've been the best wife I've ever had.' Joe raised her fingers to his lips kissing them gently.
"Oh, Billy. That is so sweet. Darling, I'll miss you tomorrow. The first time we've been separated all day."
"Yes. Eliza may I kiss you goodbye?"
"Oh...yes.' Joe pulled Eliza into his arms, kissing her passionately, until they fell backward on the bed, his love for Eliza spiraling out of control.
The next morning, Joe gathered his things in his saddlebags. The new suits and ties he would have to leave at the mansion. He searched the room making sure no items would be left behind pointing to his true identity. He walked downstairs for the last time...taking a long look at his home, then opened the door and walked away.
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The San Francisco paper came in the mail a week later. Adam read the paper with an article about Billy Best.
"Billy Best famed author and new husband of Eliza Sutton drowned recently in a freak accident. Mr. Best had been hunting with a good friend, Benjamin Cartwright of Nevada. Mr. Best was riding in the river when something spooked his horse, causing Mr. Best to fall from the saddle. He must have hit his head and was swept down river, his body lost. Mrs. Best was too distraught to speak to the papers.
Adam threw the paper into the fireplace before Little Joe could see it. It was one thing to deliberately kill off a character in a book, but another to know that it was causing pain to Billy Best's wife. His little brother had been subdued since returning home. Adam didn't know if his father had punished Little Joe or not. No one spoke about Billy Best.
Several months passed and thing were getting back to normal. Joe picked up the newspaper then let out a yell. "Good grief! Eliza got remarried!" Joe sat down on the coffee table his hands shaking.
"Good for her!" Ben said quickly. "I'm sure she'll be happy!"
"She married Bertie Small. Of all the gall, he was nothing but a hanger on!" Joe seethed just thinking about Bertie and Eliza together. "Well, if she thinks that will bother me she is so wrong! Pa, I'm going to the Sunday Picnic this week. Miss Sally wants me to bid on her basket."
"That is a good idea son." Ben could tell that Joe was finally returning to normal. Now, if he never heard of Billy Best again, it would be too soon.
"Oh." Joe squeaked out again."
"Son, what's the matter?"
"Billy Best new book just came out. "The Mystery of the Missing Heir." I wonder if ..."
"JOSEPH!"
Finis
