Since I haven't been motivated/bothered to work on The Boredom Chronicles, let's have a silly story about two of my favourite characters in the series!

First, let me apologise if this is slightly hard to read, I was having some trouble explaining Kogasa and her umbrella, and how Yuyuko cheats coming back to life or something like that. I really hope this makes enough sense...

Please try not to bang your head on your keyboard while reading as it may cause some injuries.

Universal/Third-person

"What to do, what to do?" murmured the black-white magician. "I've been hanging out at Alice's house, but I want to bring something to show her, ze. It's no fun to just watch her creations, mine are important too!

"Perhaps I should do an experiment? Yes, I should do an experiment. An experiment of imitation. I already learnt Master Spark and Non-Directional Laser, but it would be fun to do some others. I can imagine me, performing Spirit Sign "Fantasy Seal", but with a difference ze!

"I should really try something different... just copying isn't going to impress anyone... combination attacks should be interesting. Hmm... I need a partner to do this, who isn't Alice, since this should make a nice surprise for her. That umbrella girl would be fun to shoot Master Spark with; I'll be like Yuuka-san, wielding an umbrella to fire, it'll be awesome ze!

"First stop, where ever the umbrella is now!"

...

"Monster Train "Spare Umbrella Express Night Carnival"!" Hundreds of blue bullets, with some dry and wet umbrellas thrown in for good measure, flew towards and around Marisa, all hoping that they would hit her or that she would unintentionally fly into them. However, Marisa weaved around them calmly, while steadying her hands for a shot at the user of the spell card. After all, all the power in the world would not help if she missed. She would become known as an idiot, not unlike the fairy whose weakest spell card allows you to stand under her and sleep without getting hit.

"Love Sign "Master Spark"!" screamed Marisa. Even though she had done this hundreds of times, the thrill of blasting a near-unavoidable light laser at an enemy never went away. She almost felt sorry for her enemies at times; getting hit by her magical laser of destruction must have hurt, even though she herself had never been hit by it. (Not counting getting hit in Lotus Land Story by Dual Spark, I guess)

The karakasa girl fell to the ground in defeat, and Marisa quickly swooped down and caught her, before flying back to her house in the Forest of Magic. Why did the witch decide to beat the crap out of the umbrella instead of calm reasoning to get her to help with her experiment? The answer lies in force. If you simply ask someone to help you with something, they have the choice to not help, but if you FORCE someone to help you, they have no choice but to agree.

...

Tatara Kogasa, the live umbrella

When I came to my senses, I immediately noticed the amount of things surrounding me. There were things of every kind, some of which I had never seen before, so I assumed they were from the outside world. I had awoken in a strange place with strange things and a strange feeling. Getting up from the rather hard bed that I was placed on, questions flooded my mind.

Where was I? Why was I here? Was I going to die? Why am I having such a strange day?

I stopped thinking when I realised that my umbrella, or rather, I, was missing. I was beginning to panic at losing myself when the crazy black-white showed up.

"Hey," she said, "I see you're awake. You're probably looking for this, aren't you?" Holding out my umbrella, which basically meant holding me captive, she continued talking. However, all I could see was the small object she had stuck onto me. "Oh, as you might have seen, I have attached my mini-hakkero to you. This should allow me to fire a more powerful beam than before! Maybe, just maybe, you'll be able to control the mini-hakkero in time too! Think of it as payment for using your body in my experiment, ok?"

So that was what it was for. I was afraid that she was going to kill me. Blast me in the face with the mini-hakkero.

Without her half-baked explanation, I probably would have attempted to attack her and failed miserably, because I am unable to shoot anything without my umbrella. This is getting rather complicated, so I'll tell you:

I am the umbrella. We are the same person, since I am but an extension of the umbrella when I became a youkai. This means that I can disappear at will, but the umbrella will still be there. For now, I will refer to the humanoid part as "I" or "me" and the umbrella part as "my umbrella", simply to avoid confusion. Are you banging your head on your wall? I was, just trying to explain who I am.

This is almost as bad as the girl known as Saigyouji Yuyuko, who lived, died, was defeated, temporarily came back to life, and then went back to being dead, all because she attempted to awaken the soul sealing her youkai cherry blossom, which I heard was her, even though she does not know it.

Anyway, the girl, whom I now recognise as Kirisame Marisa, decided to drag me outside her house.

"Heh heh heh. Sorry about using you, you were the only option I had next to stealing the eye-gap woman's or the sunflower person's umbrellas," she said, not sounding apologetic at all.

We walked into a nearby clearing, and she pointed my umbrella up into the sky, and yelled the thing I heard her say the most. "Love Sign "Master Spark"!" A huge laser flew up into the sky. Now I wonder what the giant laser is actually made out of. It always hit me before I could notice. Perhaps it is electricity, I do not know. Maybe it is made out of snow. I was joking! Chances are it is simply a magical laser (of doom.)

My whole body shook with the force of her laser, but somehow it felt nice. Being able to control that thing on my head would make life much easier. I could use it to scare people too...

At this particular moment, the red-white miko just had to fly overhead and get blasted with a face full of laser. She fell from the sky, yelling things like, "You damn idiot!", "What is your issue with me?" and "Not again."

"Hey, shouldn't we go see if she is alright?" I asked.

"No."

"Why? Isn't she going to be injured by that?"

"Probably not. She survived worse than that before, I should think. But just for the fun of it, I'll say this:

"HEY REIMU! EAT LASER!"

Well, what did you expect her to say? "I'm sorry"? Of course not. It's Gensokyo; common sense is for the cows.

Looks like today's going to be a long day...

Fairy whose weakest spell card allows you to stand under her and sleep: I think you all know this one already.

The concepts on Yuyuko and Kogasa are merely how I see it, and aren't canon.

Is this boring? I don't think this story is particularly climatic or anything.

Anyone know what Master Spark is made out of?

Thanks for reading (and reviewing)!