Disclaimer - I own nothing you recognise.
Written For Hogwarts Assignment 1 - Sex Ed, task 2 - Write about someone getting pregnant.
Written because my twin wanted fluff. Ily, Abs.
Word count Without AN - 1188
Pitter Patter of Tiny Feet
(Or, 5 Ways Hermione could tell Ron she's pregnant, and 1 time he tells her she's pregnant)
1
Hermione handed him the box she'd spent over an hour wrapping perfectly. Her insides squirmed uncomfortably with nerves as she waited for his reaction.
A small part of her wanted to beat him with a very large stick when he ripped into the wrapping with barely any consideration of the bow she'd so meticulously tied.
He frowned when he saw the gift was a book, and she barely hid her smirk as he read the title. Blinked. Read it again.
"Really?"
His face was losing colour, even as his ears flushed red and she nodded, biting her lip.
"Seven weeks."
Ron dropped the book into his lap. "I'm going to be a dad."
"Yes," she confirmed, a hand automatically raising to rest against her stomach.
"I'm going to be a dad. Bloody hell!"
2
"What are we having for tea?" Ron called out, hanging up his Auror robes on the hook by the door.
"Yes, hello dear, how are you today," Hermione muttered, rolling her eyes at the sheepish look on Ron's face. He moved into the kitchen, wrapping his arms around her from behind, and pressing his lips to her neck.
"Hello dear, how are you today?"
Hermione chuckled. "I was busy at work so I got us a Chinese for tea," she replied, gesturing to the plates she'd already laid out on the table, a Statis charm keeping them fresh and hot.
Ron grinned. "Brilliant."
Hermione shook her head. Sometimes she regretted introducing him to the wonder of Muggle takeaway.
"Did we get fortune cookies?" he asked, sitting down at the table.
She nodded, tossing him one from the counter. He caught it one handed, cheering himself. Hermione raised her eyebrow. She'd married a child.
He broke open the cookie and read the fortune, before snorting.
"What did you get?" she asked, taking her own seat.
"I'm pregnant," he quoted, rolling his eyes. "You'd think they'd be gender neutral with their fortunes. I'm a bloke, I can't get pregnant."
Hermione sighed. She'd married a child and an idiot.
"Ron."
"Hmm?"
"Read the fortune again," she instructed, waving her wand under the table. He frowned but picked it up and read it again.
"Oh." Looking up, he smiled sheepishly. "Probably should have got that, shouldn't I?"
She nodded, an exasperated smile on her face.
"Are we… we're going to have a baby?"
She grinned. Ron jumped up from his seat, wrapping his arms around her with a gleeful yell.
On the table, the fortune lay forgotten.
Your wife is pregnant, you twit.
3
"I've laid your clothes out on the bed, hurry up and get ready, hun, I don't want to be late," Hermione called into the bathroom. She left their bedroom and headed downstairs, wondering if Ron would even notice the clothes she'd left.
Checking she had everything packed for the Burrow, she tapped her hands impatiently against the kitchen counter.
"Hermione?"
"Hmm?"
Ron walked into the kitchen, a frown on his face. "You laid out Harry's old T-shirt for me, the one Ginny bought him when she was pregnant."
He was topless, the shirt in hand.
"It's not Harry's," she replied offhandedly, turning away from him. "I bought it for you."
"Wha - but - we're not - we're - really?"
She turned back to face him, holding out a small envelope. When he opened it, it was to see an ultrasound photo in a frame. He immediately fell in love with the grain black and white bean depicted, and as he looked up for confirmation off Hermione, he noticed her eyes sparkling with tears.
"Happy birthday, Ron."
4
Retching for a final time, she slumped against the toilet, wiping her mouth on a hand towel.
"I'm taking you back to Saint Mungo's," Ron said, worrying his bottom lip with his teeth. "This sickness isn't normal, Hermione."
"I already know what's wrong with me," she replied, her chest heaving again. "Cupboard, top shelf."
Ron reached in, pulling out a long stick. He frowned. "Is this supposed to tell me something?"
"It's a pregnancy test, Ron," Hermione replied, rolling her eyes. "Remember, I told you about the Muggle way to find out?"
"Yeah. We… We're going to have a baby?"
"Just one if this sickness is the result," she said, leaning back over the toilet as her stomach contracted again.
"Merlin… a baby… hang on. Does that mean you've… you know… all over this stick?" He dropped it into the sink. "Eww. Why did you even keep that?"
"I was going to wrap it and surprise you with it, but I can't. Stop. Being. Sick."
Ron rubbed a hand up her back, smiling widely as he made sympathetic noises.
5
"Come on, Rosie, we're going to meet uncle Harry and James and Al in the park," Ron called, waiting by the door. Sure enough, his two year old daughter toddled out to him, a wide smile on her face.
"Here, sweetheart, let's get a coat on you," he murmured, bending down. He blinked when he looked at her t-shirt.
Lifting her into his arms, he walked into the living room, where Hermione was reading.
"Hermione?"
She looked up and smiled, raising her eyebrow in question.
"Why is Rosie wearing a T-shirt saying 'World's Best Big Sister'?"
"I happen to think she will be the world's best big sister," Hermione replied cheerfully, smiling at the giggling little girl. "Won't you, Rosie?"
"Are you sure?"
Hermione nodded. "Healer confirmed it yesterday."
Ron grinned, leaning down to press a kiss to her lips. "Brilliant. You sure you don't want to come to the park?"
Hermione shook her head. "I've got work to do. You two have fun."
Ron nodded, heading back towards the door, before he stopped.
"Merlin."
"What?"
"That means we're gonna have to deal with your cravings again, doesn't it? I swear, if you start chewing on coal again -"
"Then you'll smile and not say a word, because I'll be carrying your child," Hermione interrupted, her eyes narrowing.
Ron nodded. "Yes, dear."
+1
Hermione woke slowly, blinking her eyes open to find herself in an unfamiliar room. Ron was sitting next to her bed, a happy smile on his face.
Odd, considering they were obviously in a hospital room.
"What happened?" she asked, smiling when he startled slightly at her voice. He leant forward in his chair, picking her hand up and holding it between both of his own.
"You fainted at work," he informed her quietly. "Your blood sugar was low, because you skipped lunch - again."
Hermione felt her face heat up.
"Thing is, you're going to have to start looking after yourself, and eating more. You're eating for two now, babe."
"I will, I pro - wait, what?"
"We're pregnant!" Ron all but shouted, the grin spreading even further across his face.
Hermione took a moment to let the news sink in, just as the Healer entered the room.
"Pregnant," she whispered, a hand moving to rest on her stomach. "We're going to be parents."
Ron nodded. "A family, Hermione. Our own little family."
She squeezed his hand. "We're already a family, Ron. We're just getting a bit bigger."