Hey guys, my wireless internet card died, so my computer got sent in for repairs. I'll try to update when I can, but it'll probably be hard for the next few weeks. Oh, and I've never been to Cincinnati (or known anyone in Ohio for that matter), so I have no idea what there is to do or see there, and since I don't have the internet, I can't look it up. Here's hoping that fact doesn't distract too much from the story. Enjoy!
The Exhibit
Chapter 1
Cappie,
My first exhibition opens at the Freer Gallery in Cincinnati on February 22nd, but there is a special media-showing the evening of the 21st. I really want you to come that night, and bring Casey with you. It would mean a lot to me. See you soon!
James
"Bring Casey with me?" Cappie asked, staring at the email he had just read. "He knows we've been broken up for over a year, he was here when it happened."
Shaking his head, he clicked the forward button and then quickly typed Casey's email address and a short message. Hitting the send button, he wondered what he was getting himself into.
Case--
You probably have something going on for President's Day weekend, but James asked me to invite you to go down to his first show. It's supposed to be amazing, but if you're busy, it's not a big deal. Talk to you soon!
--Cap
Casey smiled at the email, wondering how Cappie felt about James telling him to invite her. James, she wondered, Who is… Oh yeah! James was Cappie's big! The photographer!
Finally remembering who the mysterious photographer was, she sent back a quick reply.
Cap,
Of course I'll go. See ya in class!
C.
Cappie let out a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding since he saw the reply from her in his inbox. With a grin on his face, he clicked the window shut and grabbed his bag. If he left now, he'd be able to catch her on the way to class.
Leaving the house, he saw her just a couple of houses passed the Kappa Tau house. Jogging to catch up to her, he tried to wipe the grin from his face before she saw it.
"Case!" he called, slowing to a walk as he got closer. "Hey."
"Hey Cap," she replied, smiling over at him, "I got your email."
"Oh yeah?" he asked, trying to play it cool, to make it seem like he hadn't been sitting at the computer waiting for her reply.
"Yeah, I'm looking forward to it. I haven't been to Cincinnati in a long time."
"I've never been there. Is there anything interesting to see?" he asked, genuinely interested. Maybe if there was actually something to do they could stay for the weekend, rather than just the one night, he thought, trying not to get his hopes up.
"Oh there's a ton to see!" Casey was getting excited, "And my best friend from high school lives there, so we'll have a place to stay."
Cappie smiled at her as she rattled on about the places she went the last time she was in the city, and he found himself looking forward to something more than he had allowed himself in a very long time.
James,
We'll be there. See you on the 21st
Cappie
The next three weeks passed quicker than Cappie imagined they would, and finally it was the afternoon of the 21st. Pacing the length of his room, he wondered where she was. She was supposed to meet him at the Kappa Tau house, and then he would drive them up to Cincinnati. With a glance at the clock, he realized she was… one minute late.
Chill Cap, he told himself, she'll be here, and then you'll be gone for the weekend. Just you and her. No Zeta Betas, and no Kappa Taus, just you.
He fought down the grin that spread across his face when the doorbell rang. Here we go…
Grabbing his jacket and bag, he left his room, heading down to meet Casey. At the bottom of the stairs he saw Rusty talking to Casey.
The minute she saw him, her eyes lit up, and a smile spread across her features. "Hey Cap," she said, "You ready to get out of here?"
"Definitely, Case," he said, grabbing her bag and heading for the door. "See you on Sunday, Russ!" he called, following Casey out the front door.
"Bye you guys!" Rusty called as he closed the door, watching the pair head down the steps and out to Cappie's Jeep.
Almost two hours later, Casey was fiddling with the radio and laughing with Cappie as she told him stories about her and Janie from high school. "I swear!" she said, trying to contain her laughter long enough to breath, "and then she walked right passed him and pushed him into the pool!"
Cappie's laughter filled the car, surrounding her in its familiarity. With a smile on her face, she settled back against the worn seat, pulling out her phone to call Janie to check in.
"We should be there soon, but we're only going to be able to drop our stuff off if we're going to be at the gallery on time," she explained, pausing to listen to her friend's reply on the other end of the line. "That sounds good. I'll call you when we're done, so figure out where you want to meet up and let me know."
Hanging up, Casey grinned at Cappie. She had really been looking forward to this weekend all month, and she couldn't imagine bringing anyone besides Cappie to meet her friend Janie. No one from CRU had met Janie, but she knew Cappie and Janie would get along extremely well.
She gave him directions to get off the freeway and go out to Janie's apartment, rummaging through her purse for the spare key. "She isn't home yet," Casey explained to Cappie, "but we're just going to drop off our stuff and then we have to get down to the gallery. After we're done there, we'll meet up with Janie and her boyfriend for dinner."
"Sounds good," Cappie said as he parked the Jeep on the street and climbed out. Stretching his stiff muscles, he reached in the back to grab their bags before following Casey up the steps to the apartment building.
Cappie grinned as he watched Casey punch in the code and unlock the door with ease, then bypass the elevator and take the stairs as if she lived in the building. Arriving on the second landing, she let them into the apartment and dropped her purse on the table. Giving Cappie a quick tour of the tiny apartment, she showed him where to leave there bags while she went into the bathroom to freshen up.
True to what she had said, they had just enough time to change and drop their bags before needing to leave. Half an hour later, they had parked and were walking towards the entrance of the gallery. The streets were quiet and almost deserted in the snow, the only sign of life being the occasional body running for their car.
Turning the corner, they found themselves on a bright street corner with dozens of people milling around. Taking Casey's gloved hand in his own, so they wouldn't get separated in the crowd, Cappie began to weave between people, heading towards the main entrance to the gallery. Once there, an older woman with graying hair asked for their tickets to the pre-viewing of the exhibit.
"We don't have tickets," Cappie tried to explain to the woman, "We were personally invited by James Ness."
Raising one silver eyebrow, she re-consulted her list. "What are your names?" she asked, looking up at them.
"Casey Cartwright and Cappie," he responded automatically, praying James hadn't used his real name.
"Alight," she told him, checking off their names on the guest list. "There are refreshments in the lobby, but you won't be able to take anything into the actual exhibit. Enjoy your evening!"
"Thank you," Cappie replied automatically, allowing Casey to lead him into the building.
Once they had checked their coats and turned back towards the main lobby, they were immediately accosted by an old friend. "Cappie! Casey! It's so good to see you!" James told them, his grin wider than that of the Cheshire cat.
Cappie dropped Casey's hand to give his friend a big hug, then stepped back to let Casey hug him as well. "It's good to be here," Cappie told him, "It's been too long since we got together the last time."
"Well, you know me. I've been here and there. A little bit of everywhere," he explained, his grin dropping a little. "I think my face is going to be numb after this evening. They keep wanting me to smile, and won't take the stern, depressed artist thing."
The three laughed together, Cappie breaking the laughter long enough to tell him, "You could never be the stern, depressed artist. You like to laugh too much!" which got them started on another round of laughter.
"James!" someone called from the hubbub of the lobby, "James!"
With a grin for his friends, he said, "Duty calls. But we should go out after the exhibition closes to get some food and catch up, alright?"
"Definitely. We're going to meet up with some old friends of Casey's so that works out well," Cappie told him, waving him off towards the people still calling after him.
"Shall we go into the exhibit?" Casey asked him, after James had left. "I really want to see what everyone is talking about."
"What do you mean, 'what everyone is talking about'?" Cappie asked her, taking her hand as they stepped amongst the crowd and into the adjoining room containing the exhibit.
"Everyone around here keeps commenting on the emotion, the energy, and the passion in his pictures. I want to see them," Casey explained, stopping short as they came upon the first picture.
Looking to see what had caused Casey to stop walking and speaking so suddenly, he froze, staring at the picture in front of them.
The first photograph of the exhibit was taken in a café, the hustle and bustle showing it was probably midmorning. The majority of the figures were a blur of movement, but two figures stood out in stark contrast to the others. The woman in the center of the photograph was sitting alone at a table, a textbook open in front of her with a cup of coffee sitting next to it. Behind her, there was a young man sitting at a table of people, but even in a black and white photograph, it was obvious his bright eyes were focused solely on the girl. What had stopped both Cappie and Casey in their steps was not the picture itself, or even the emotion that was seen simmering in the man's eyes, but that fact that it was them. The first day they had met. Laughing at something Beaver had said, Cappie had accidentally bumped into Casey, causing her to drop her coffee. After apologizing profusely and buying her a new one, he had then spent the rest of his time there staring at her. Her concentration had fascinated him, how she was able to block out the noise and general commotion of the cafe to be able to study. He knew right then that she was special, and he knew whoever was with her would be the luckiest person in the world.
They stood in front of the photograph, both lost in their own thoughts and memories as people came and went around them, moving on to the other photographs. Finally Casey took a step towards the next photograph, breaking the trance that seemed to hold them fixated.
The next photograph grabbed their attention in the same way the first had, and the stopped again, their gazes transfixed on the picture. This one was much more difficult to tell it was them, as their backs were to the camera, but they both knew. The picture showed a couple walking away from the camera, hand-in-hand. The distance in front of the figures was blurred away, to make it seem as if the couple was walking into forever, with no destination in sight. Casey smiled, remembering their second date. Cappie had told her to meet him at the Kappa Tau house, dressed casually. In true Cappie fashion, he hadn't given her a hint as to what they were going to do. He had blindfolded her and took her hand, leading her through the house, and out into the yard. Once onto the grass, he had taken off the blindfold, letting her see the romantic picnic set up for the two of them. They had set off across the yard, hand-in-hand, settling down on the blanket to eat. After they had both eaten their fill, they had laid beneath the stars, talking about anything and everything. That was the first time she had seen a shooting star, and Cappie told her to make a wish. And she had, that she would always remember that moment, when life was completely perfect.
Cappie had let go of Casey's hand, moving his arm around her shoulder as they stepped to the third photograph. After seeing the first two, he had a guess as to where the next was going, but he still wasn't prepared for what he saw. The sight of the picture caused the breath to catch in his lungs, the raw emotion so evident on the faces of those in the picture. It was the first time he told her he loved her. It had been a rainy day, and half the campus was flooded, canceling classes for the remainder of the day. They had chosen to curl up in the window seat of the Kappa Tau house, wrapped in a blanket as they watched people hurry up and down the street for shelter from the wind and rain. He had turned her slightly in his arms, so he could see her face. 'Casey' he had said softly, 'I love you.' A second had passed, but it felt like a lifetime as he awaited her response. Finally, she had kissed him, pouring everything she had into that kiss. And when she eventually drew back, she had whispered 'I love you, too.' The picture had been taken in that moment, when they were both dizzy with the emotion of what had just happened, her full lips red and shining and her eyes filled with love.
They stood in front of this photograph for what seemed like an eternity, completely oblivious to the clamor around them as people stopped to look and discuss the picture. Both were so lost in the emotion of the photograph that they never realized someone had pointed out they were the ones featured in the pictures. Neither noticed that instead of photographing the exhibit, the photographers were now taking pictures of them.
When they finally moved on, it was to a photograph they knew well. It was Casey's favorite picture of them; one Cappie had given to her in a bamboo frame. The one from the Vesuvius party, where they sat on the porch railing, completely lost in each other, as if the rest of the world didn't exist, and time had stood still.
The rest of the exhibit progressed in much of the same way; there was a picture of them dancing in the street in the pouring rain, one of the time they had protested protests, pictures from various parties and mixers from their first year, from the Kappa Tau formal they had gone to. Not all of them showed happy moments, but the common thread was the overwhelming love and passion contained within every single photograph, even in the one taken in the midst of a fight. The numbers of pictures seemed endless, creating a chronology of their year together. When they came to the picture of them in the snow, Casey had wrapped her hand around the locket that hung from her neck, rubbing her thumb over the smooth silver in an unconscious motion.
The same thing had happened when they came to the picture of them in the park, although her hand did not drop from the locket when they moved onto the next one, as it had the first time. She knew they were coming up on the end of the exhibit. There would only be a couple of pictures left, and she was dreading where it was going. She had enjoyed reliving their relationship, all the good times, and some of the bad, but she didn't want to see the end of it. With a glance around, she realized nearly everyone had left. There were only a couple left, talking near the entrance.
Trying to compose herself as they walked on, she looked at the next one. It was taken just days before they had broken up. They were sitting on the green couch in the Kappa Tau house, laughing. Casey was leaning forward, her hand on Cappie's knee, with laughter and happiness shining in her eyes. Cappie was looking at her as if he was the luckiest man in the world. Neither one knew exactly why they were laughing, but they were. And she was happier than anything she could ever remember. Choking back a sob, she tried to cover it up with a cough, but Cappie knew better. Pulling her close to him, he let her bury her face in his shirt, trying not to cry.
"Hey," he said, "What is it?"
Pulling back from his chest, she looked up at him, tears shining in his eyes. "That was the night they told me I had to break up with you. Just after I had gotten back to the house, Frannie cornered me, and they told me I had to choose. You or them."
Looking down at her, his heart felt like breaking again, except it was still in pieces from the last time. "Casey," he said, "Casey." Bringing his hand to her face, he gently brushed away her few stray tears. "Let's get out of here."
"Okay, but there's one more," she replied, turning so his arms were still around her, but so they could walk. Turning the final corner, all the color drained from her face, and the tears began anew, seeing the photograph in front of her.
As soon as they had turned the corner, and Cappie had realized what the picture was, he dropped his arms from Casey's body and strode out of the exhibit. He was livid, in a way he had never been before. Making his way through the people in the lobby, he grabbed James by the back of his shirt and dragged him outside, giving him a hard push on the snow-covered sidewalk. "What do you think you're doing, putting that last picture in there?" he asked, his voice indignant, but cracking with hurt and betrayal.
"Cappie," James tried explaining, knowing how angry his friend was, "I needed to tell the whole story. It was this story of love and passion that people were able to watch unfold as they walk through the exhibit, but if there was no conclusion, they would just want more. People would be asking me to finish the exhibit, because there wouldn't be an end to it."
"So you just used my pain to make a name for yourself?!" Cappie practically screamed, his body shaking in anger.
"No, Cappie," James stepped closer, putting his hands on Cappie's shoulders, trying to calm him, "I used it to show everyone the whole story. Cappie, no one in this world shows their emotion the way you do. It pours off you in buckets, whether it is love, the pain of a broken heart, or anger. It shows people what it's all about, emotion, human connection. Cappie, it's helping people, seeing that photograph, knowing that not everything has the storybook ending.
People can relate to the pain that they see."
"You could have at least given me a warning or something," Cappie finally replied, his anger slowly receding. "You could have given me a warning that the entire exhibit was about me and Casey."
"I thought about it, but that would've ruined the surprise I know you both had with every picture. Most of which I know you've never seen."
With a slight glare at his friend, Cappie's anger finally disappeared completely. Quickly embracing James, Cappie stepped back and made to go back into the gallery, with one final comment, "It's beautiful you know. Perfect. The whole thing."
James just smiled at his friend's retreating figure. "So I've been told, so I've been told," he said to himself. "But your opinion was the only one that mattered."
Still inside, Casey was still standing in front of the picture with tears pouring over her cheeks. She had given up trying to stop them and just gave into the pain. With one hand on the wall to steady herself, she took in the most beautiful, but also most painful, sight she had ever seen.
The picture was done completely in black and white, with the exception of Cappie's eyes. His eyes were true to the brilliant, shining blue they usually were, but in the photograph they were shimmering with tears. Tear tracks covered his cheeks, as the figure of Cappie sat, hunched over on the couch in the living room of the Kappa Tau house. The pain of a broken heart seemed to roll off him in waves, enveloping the viewer in his pain.
And Casey finally knew what she had never known before. How much her breaking up with Cappie had truly hurt him, had broken his heart into a million pieces. She knew she had hurt him, but she didn't realize to what extent, but now she knew. And the rest of the world knew, too.
She stood there, crying, ashamed of what she had done almost two years earlier. Ashamed that after causing that kind of pain, that Cappie would ever take her back, even for one night. And then she had broken him again. And so she cried, for Cappie's pain, for the pain she had after breaking up with him, for the pain she caused him.
Through her tears, she felt his arms wrap themselves around her body, holding her close against his wide, solid chest. Turning in his arms, she buried her face in his shirt, clinging to him in apology. And he held her as if the world was ending and she was the only thing that mattered, because in his world, she was.
Fighting to control her tears, Casey pulled away from Cappie's damp shirt and looked up at him. "I have no right to feel like this, Cappie," she whispered between gulps of air. "I did that," she gestured over her shoulder, "and yet you're still here, holding me when I need you."
"Casey," he said, a single tear falling down his face, "what is love without pain?"
"I didn't know," she said after a long silence, "I didn't know how bad I hurt you."
"No one did, only James," he told her honestly, "until now, that is."
She nodded slightly, then turned her face back into his warm chest. "I'm sorry," she told him, her voice muffled by his shirt.
"I couldn't even look at another girl, you know," he told her, his arms still wrapped tightly around her small frame. "For months, every time I saw a girl, I saw you." He could feel her sobs begin anew, her shoulders shaking against his body. "So I threw myself into Kappa Tau, to distract myself, I guess. And after about six months, I threw myself into the world of women, but still I compared every one of them to you."
Pulling back to look at him, she asked an unspoken question, "But for a while there was a different girl in your bed every night."
"And every single one of them told me that your name was the only one I ever said," Cappie told her, breaking eye contact with the girl in his arms. Instead, he focused on the photograph in front of him.
Casey looked at him in amazement, unable to comprehend how deep his love ran for her. Her thumbs were rubbing small circles where her hands clung to his back, and she pulled him closer, as if trying to meld their two bodies into one. "I never stopped loving you, you know," she told him finally. "Every time Evan and I were together, I kept thinking it should be you touching me. Not him."
With a deep breath she continued, knowing she needed to tell him everything, "The first few times I called your name, but then he would get angry, so I started editing myself, making sure I only said his name. But then he would get mad if I made any sound, so I finally stopped saying anything at all, I would force myself to be quiet, not to say a word or make any noise."
Pulling his gaze from the picture back to the girl in his arms, he looked startled. "He made you be quiet?" he asked, "Is that why when we were together during rush you were so much more subdued than normal?"
With a nod of her head, she broke the intense connection that had been forged between them. "I knew it was you, and that I didn't need to be silent, but I couldn't just let myself go anymore," she told him.
"He had you keeping up appearances while you were having sex?!" he seemed stunned, shocked. "The noises you make were some of my favorite things about you, you know," he told her honestly.
Pulling her arms from where they were wrapped around his abdomen, she wrapped one around his shoulders, bringing her other hand to his face. Tracing over his cheek with her thumb, she slid her fingers into his hair, tangling them into his soft, silky locks. "Cappie," she whispered, pulling his face down to meet hers, "I love you."
And then they were kissing, and it felt as if the world had stopped. Her lips were soft and incessant against his, and when she ran his tongue along his lower lip, he immediately granted her access. The moment their tongues brushed together, it was like a piece of heaven, kissing her again.
Just as he was about to lose himself completely in her, he felt as if someone had dumped a cup of cold water on his head. Pulling away from her lips, he let go of his hold on her body and took a couple of steps back. "Casey," he said, trying not to look at the hurt that was etched across her face, "we can't do this until we talk. I can't handle this again, until we work through some things."
Casey just nodded slowly, unsure of what made him stop, but willing to give him time. She wanted to be with him, needed to be with him, but knew it would take some work, and she was willing to give that. Wiping her eyes one last time, she looked up at him and asked, "You ready to get out of here?"
"Yeah," he agreed, "let's go." Putting an arm around her shoulders, they walked out into the lobby to collect their jackets and James.