Disclaimer: If someone is posting a story on FF.N, it's a fairly safe bet that they don't own the source material.
A/N: A brief Marshall/Lily and Barney/Robin-oriented post-ep to 7x17: "No Pressure." It's a little clunky, but hopefully enjoyable nonetheless.
Lily always wins the important bets.
It's just a fact of life, albeit one that Marshall has yet to accept, even after years of marriage. Marshall is pretty savvy when it comes to predicting relationships, but Lily? Lily has freakin' relationship clairvoyance.
So after Marshall fills Lily in on the latest Ted and Robin news, Lily sighs and turns to Marshall. "For Ted's sake, I hate to say this, but… pay up."
Marshall smiles a little half-smile, and replies, "Not yet."
Lily shakes her head in disappointment.
"It isn't going to happen, Marshall," she says. "They're over."
"I don't know…" Marshall comments. "I still think there's a little something-something there, if you know what I mean."
He waggles his eyebrows cheerfully.
"Not going to happen," Lily insists.
"Oh really?" Marshall asks, raising a single eyebrow.
"Really," Lily says.
"How can you be so sure? My boy Ted's got some pretty smooth moves," Marshall points out.
Lily purses her lips and says gently, "Isn't it obvious, baby?"
Marshall stares at her.
"Barney's still in love with Robin," Lily explains, sighing. "And Robin… well, she's still scared of how much she loves Barney."
Marshall shakes his head. "I think you've got this one wrong, Lilypad," he says. "Ted said that Barney gave him the green light to make a move on Robin. What guy in love would do that?"
"Selfless love," Lily says. "Mature love."
"Right," Marshall snorts. "Because those are words that I'd use to describe Barney. Selfless. Mature."
"You have a point," Lily admits. "But… he's gotten better. And that's why – when Robin finally stops running from herself – they're going to end up together."
"Remember how horribly their relationship ended last time? No way they'd give it a serious go again," Marshall insists.
"They still have more growing up to do before it'll work," Lily concedes, "but it's going to happen eventually."
"Wanna bet on it?" Marshall asks challengingly.
"You've got yourself a deal, buster," Lily says holding out her hand.
They spit on their hands, and shake them solemnly.
Then Lily pulls out a pen and writes on a scrap of paper, Lily bets Marshall that Barney and Robin will end up together.
"We really need to find a better hiding place for this," she comments, as she puts the note in the Bet Box.
"Yeah, Barney knows where it is now," Marshall agrees. "That's dangerous."
"Speaking of dangerous, I'm a little disappointed that Barney destroyed our sex tape," Lily murmurs. After a brief pause, she asks, "Want to make a new one?"
"Um… OK," Marshall says.
"Great! I'll get the camera," Lily says, bouncing off the bed.
"No!" Marshall exclaims, before adding in a reproachful tone, "I need time to get my body in sexy camera-shape. You know the camera adds ten pounds, Lily."
"Fine," Lily sighs, sitting back down next to him. "Next week?"
"Next week," Marshall promises, and leans in to kiss her.
They fall back onto the bed in a tangle of arms and legs.
They'll figure out a new hiding spot for the Box tomorrow.