Am I Falling In Love Again!

by animenerd10210

Byakuya has lived a life of solitude since the death of his wife Hisana. But when a young, misguided, misjudged, slightly rude and rebellious soul reaper comes to notice in his life, how does he deal with it?

I walked into the squad 6 meeting room and took up a seat next to an open window. The cool winter air relaxed me as it gently brushed against my face and through my hair. I looked at some Sakura trees. They mesmerized me the way they shifted with the flow of the wind.

Using some of my spiritual energy, I blew off some of the leaves. I waved my hand around, controlling the wind and making the leaves dance around.

"May I have everyone's attention?"

Captain Kuchiki's voice rang throughout the room. Everyone silenced and gave the captain their undivided attention. I, on the other hand, was more concerned with the Sakura petals currently in my possession. Waving my fingers about, I played with the leaves like a puppeteer. A cat strayed about around the area where I was holding the petals. Lowering the petals, I began to tease the cat into chasing them. The cat rolled over on its back and began pawing at the leaves. I couldn't help but let out a small giggle.

"Do you find something amusing Nayami?"

The captain called.

"Huh?"

I asked, jumping out of my little moment. Having lost my concentration, I found I dropped the petals and the cat had already had them in its mouth. Sighing, I turned my attention to the captain.

"Not anymore."

I replied, slightly agitated that I had been taking out of my calm zone.

"Have you listened to a single word throughout this entire meeting?"

"I listened to a sentence."

I replied, not really caring.

"And what exactly did you hear?"

I smiled my famous catlike smile. "'May I have everyone's attention'."

Renji and a few others in the room laughed a bit at my comment.

"Silence."

He spoke loudly. The room was silent once again.

"Nayami, leave. This meeting apparently isn't important enough for you."

"Whatever Bob. This gives me more time to catch up on my sleep."

I stated on my way out.

"You're useless anyways so it wouldn't really matter if you were asleep or just not paying attention. A waste of space like you should just disappear."

With that said, he went back to the subject they were on before. I walked out of the room and started on my way back to my room.

'So what else is new? It's not like anyone cares anyways. My own parents didn't want me, what made me think that I would be wanted here?'

I stopped for a moment and starred at the floor.

'Nii-san...'

My mind flashed back to the first encounter I had with my older brother.

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I was out on my nightly stroll around the Rukon District. My kimono hung loosely around my body. One of the elderly men in District felt sorry and gave it to me. I was only about 10 years old when he did so you could say I have grown into it a bit more with me now being 26.

I stopped at my usual place and sat on a small wooden bench. I looked around. No lights emanated from any of the houses or shops. A few people were asleep on some boxes in an alley.

I sighed. This place was doomed. Why I was still here I didn't even know. Getting up, I headed back to my small, little rundown abandoned shed I called home.

When I entered, I was too tired to pay attention to anything. Untying my kimono, I let it fall to the ground. I shivered as the cold air hit my almost bare body. A bandaging had covered from my chest to a little pass my lower area. I crawled on some bags that were full of shredded paper and other soft items I had found just laying around. This was my bed. My blanket was made up of used cloths I had found and sown together.

Sleep came easily to me. My mind drifted off.

As my dream begins, it is pitch black. There's a smell in the air. It's that of rose petals and perfume. My eyes open to a woman with short black hair. She looks frustrated. A man stands off in the distance next to a boy with snow white hair. He looks back at me. His eyes are icy looking.

"Mommy?"

I ask.

"SHUT UP! NO MORE! I CAN'T STAND TO LOOK AT YOU!"

She screams, slapping me across the face. It burns. I hear the man speaking now to the little boy.

"Come Toshiro, let us take our leave."

I look to the boy one last time through tear blurred eyes. He looks back at me then to the man. They hurry out of the room.

My mother picks me up and I cling to her tightly. I look ahead of me as she runs with me down a dirt path behind our house. She covers my eyes and continues to run.

"Mommy, I can't see."

She squeezes me tighter.

"Mommy, that hurts!"

Her nails begin to dig into my side.

"Mommy stop!"

I cry. She ignores me and continues running for a few more minutes. When she stops, she removes her hand from my eyes and I see we are now in a forest.

"Mommy, what's-"

I look up to her for an answer. She stares down at me, hysteria in her eyes.

"You should have never been born. I can't stand to look at you, you worthless, hideous, useless, child!"

She hisses, striking me again and again. Multiple times I feel her hands beating on me. Then suddenly, she stops. A man yells and I hear her leave. All is black. I can't see anymore. I can't hear anymore. I can only feel... Feel the pain of being hurt, being left alone... Unwanted... Uncared for... Useless... It's all I could be.

I jolted awake from my dream. Almost every night I had to relive that horrible nightmare that occurred about 20 years ago. I haven't seen my mother since. I never did find out who that boy was. I never saw him again.

I sighed and wipe my sweat soaked head. I tried to go back to sleep, but I found that I was unable too. As I lay atop my makeshift bed, I heard the sound of footfall. I never cared enough to find out who would be walking around at this time of night. I tried to ignore the crunching of gravel and get back to sleep. I listened for a minute as the footsteps got closer.

Then suddenly, they stopped. My eyes sprang open when I realized they had stopped outside of my door. I remained quiet and still, hopping that whoever it was would leave. I could see their shadow from under the door. Whoever it was, was just standing there. Then suddenly, they disappeared.

'W-What? How can they just disappear like that?'

I jolted up and ran to the small window next to the door. I peaked outside, but couldn't see anything.

"So there was someone in here."

I jumped and turned around to face a person standing in the shadows. From the sound of their voice, it was obviously a man.

"Who are you?"

I asked. I didn't really know what to do in a situation like this.

"Are you Nayami?"

He asked.

"Depends who's asking."

"Are you or are you not?"

"I'll tell you what. If you decide to show yourself, I'll tell you."

The man was quiet for a minute before walking into the light that peaked in from the moon. I took in his height first. He spoke like a grown man, but looked like a child. I couldn't tell his eye or hair color, but there was something about him that seemed familiar.

I sighed.

"Yes, I am Nayami."

I stated.

"Get dressed and follow me."

He demanded as he walked out the front door.

"I'll be waiting outside when you're done."

With that, he closed the door. I starred after him for a moment before I realized I was standing half naked in front of a complete stranger. My face felt extremely hot as I reached for the kimono that lay on the floor. I put it on as quickly as possible.

Once I was sure I was decent, I opened the door and looked around. Just as he had said, he was waiting outside.

He looked up at me once before turning to walk away. Without a word, I followed him.

"Where are we going?"

I asked after a few minutes. He didn't answer.

"If you're not going to tell me, will you at least tell me your name?"

I asked. He stopped walking.

"I'll tell you in a little bit. Right now, all I'm going to tell you is that of the 13 Court Guard Squads, I am the captain of squad 10. I've been sent here on a mission to eliminate a group of hollows. I brought some of my men with me and we have a camp near here. When we get there, I will explain how you are involved."

With that, he stopped talking and continued walking. I looked at him for a moment before continuing to follow him.

A few minutes later, we came to a small camp. Some soul reapers had huddled around a fire and were obviously drunk.

"Heeeeey Captain~ welcome back!"

A woman with orange hair greeted as he walked up to the group. I stood back a little feeling uncomfortable being in this new setting, surrounded by unfamiliar people.

"Hey, who's that?"

One of the men who were sitting there asked.

"Looks like a fun night."

Replied another. The captain shot him a look and he immediately looked away.

"Rangiku, I told you not to be drinking while I was gone."

"Awwww, c'mon captain, we were just having a little fun."

The lady answered.

"That's enough of this. Everyone is to return to their tents and sleep up for tomorrow."

He stated. Everyone replied with a yes sir and returned to their tents except the woman known now as Rangiku.

"That means you too."

He stated. She sighed heavily.

"Fine, fine. Try not to stay up too late yourself there tiger."

She replied with a wink. A visible blush made its way to his face.

"Just, get out of here!"

He shouted at her as she laughed and went back to her tent. He sighed heavily.

"Come have a seat and I'll start my explanation."

He said while taking a seat on a rock in front of the fire. I cautiously made my way over to the fire where I took a seat across from him. My kimono began slipping off my shoulder. I stumbled to get it. Sighing, I looked across the fire to the boy or man or whatever he was. I tried to figure out why he seemed so familiar.

It wasn't until he looked up that I noticed he had icy blue eyes. I went stiff. This couldn't be the same boy as back then... Could it? After all these years.

"Who... are you?"

I asked once more.

He sighed.

"My name is Toshiro Hitsuguya."

My eyes widened. This was the same boy. I was too shocked to say anything.

"The first and only time I ever saw you was over 20 years ago. My father was leaving my mother... She was... your mother too."

Chills went up and down my spine.

"Although we had the same parents,"

He continued

"We never saw each other. The only time I ever saw you... You were in pain."

He got quiet. I couldn't stop starring at him. Was this true?

"H-How could we have never met if we had the same parents?"

I worked up enough nerve to ask.

"You see, our mother... When you were born, she was really happy. She spent so much time with you. Night and day. Up until you were three. She started changing. Our father would always spend time with me. It was, you could say, a father and son, mother and daughter thing."

He looked at me intently. I watched him carefully.

"Mother was getting tired of father not spending enough time with her and when he told her about her spending so much time with you, she started to... Distance herself from you. She tried to get closer to father, but he was used to spending time with me. You, by then, had become really attached to her, according to what father said. Mother apparently found that you were in the way. Father said to me once that she had told him that it was perfect before you were born... I... I would always ask my father to see you and when he would try to let me, mother would get in the way. She would never let me. Things got so bad to the point where father said that he was leaving with me. Mother got hysterical. That day, they were arguing. I had gone to see what the problem was. When I went to their room, I saw you. When I saw mother hit you... I felt filled with such pain. I wanted to help you... But I couldn't. Father took me away. That's when he filled in all the blanks. I wanted to know what happened to you for so long, but I could never find you."

He was silent. I didn't really know what to think at the moment. He... I had no idea.

"I... I..."

I couldn't speak.

"I took the opportunity of being out of the soul society to see if I could find you. It took a while. I had to ask around a lot. Finally, an old man was able to give me enough information as to where you were."

I got up and walked over to him. Looking him in the eyes, I could see the truth. He was sad, I could tell.

"I want you to join the 13 Court Squads."

He stated.

"Why?"

I asked, somewhat surprised.

"I lost track of you when I didn't even get a chance to know you. I want to know about my little sister. I don't want to lose you. I want to make up for everything."

He stated.

"Well, I've got nothing better to do here."

I replied. He smiled.

"I promise to make it up."

I looked at the fire.

"Don't make promises you can't keep."

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Sighing at the memory, I continued on my way back to my room. I was tired. I didn't want to think about anything else at the moment. I knew that I was useless. I didn't need my mother or Byakuya to tell me that. I've heard it everywhere so what would be the point in hearing it one more time. Even during my training in the academy, all my classmates said the same thing. The teacher did. The only person who ever believed in me was nii-san... I didn't care who I let down, just as long as it wasn't nii-san.

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My room was moderately cold. With all my spiritual energy floating around in there, it was like my own personal air conditioning. I liked it cold. It numbed the world around me.

I quietly crawled into bed. I faced the wall opposite of the entrance. The curtains were opened, letting in too much light. Releasing a gust of my spiritual pressure, I pushed the curtains down. I was finally relaxed and drifting off to sleep when a Hell Butterfly flew in through the window and landed on my cheek. I stared at it and read its message.

'Damn it brother, you can't let me sleep?'

I thought with a laugh. I sighed and sat up. The butterfly flew off my cheek and went back out the window. Standing up, I walked out of my room, closed the door and locked it before flash stepping to the Squad 10 Captain Quarters.

Without knocking, I casually walked in. Rangiku was asleep on the couch as usual. Toshiro was doing some paperwork. Not feeling the need to bother him, I sat on the floor in front of Rangiku. There was a pen on the table in front of me. I picked it up and began poking Rangiku in the stomach. Every time I did, she snorted. I laughed a little each time. At one point, I poked her pretty hard and she snorted deep and loud. I started laughing so hard she woke up.

"What's going on?"

She asked, drool covering half her face. I stared at her for a few seconds before laughing even louder than before.

"What's so funny?"

She asked.

"Ahahahaha, oh nothing!"

She clicked her tongue and walked out. I waited for a moment, listening as she descended down the hallway. I heard some other people laughing and Rangiku's spiritual pressure increased than disappeared. I laughed more.

Toshiro sighed and stood up. He walked over to the door and shut it. Standing there, he just stared at me. I stopped laughing and looked down.

"Sorry brother."

He walked passed me and to his desk.

"Take a seat; I need to speak with you on an important matter."

I did as I was told and sat down facing the floor. A few minutes of silence passed. I heard Toshiro get up and walk over in front of me.

"Look at me Nayami."

I picked my head up and starred at my brother. He looked a bit agitated. I felt bad, like I had truly done something to disappoint him.

"It has been brought to my attention that during your captains meetings, you fail to pay attention and loaf off during the day. Please do understand that, when a captain calls a meeting, it is most likely concerning something important and should require your attention whether or not you find it amusing or not."

He stopped and looked me in the eye.

"I-I know, please forgive me brother."

I replied, looking down. I felt horrible. I couldn't stand letting him down.

'I've disappointed him, haven't I? I screwed up again... All I can do is cause him problems.'

Just as I began feeling worse about myself, I felt Toshiro's arms wrap around me.

"Listen, I'm not mad at you. I'm just trying to tell you that I'm worried about you. I don't want you getting into any kind of trouble."

He spoke softly and his words were as kind and gentle as they have always been.

"Thank you nii-san, I really appreciate the fact that you took the time to worry about me, but please don't. I'll work harder for you so please don't worry about me."

I looked him in the eye when I spoke. I wasn't lying when I said this. Toshiro was the only person I could never lie to.

He smiled and his face softened.

"Alright. Is that a promise?"

He asked. I nodded.

"I need to get back to work, you should do the same."

He stated. I nodded.

"I'll see you later for dinner."

I told him. He nodded as he walked back to his desk. Running over to him, I gave him a quick kiss and hug before flash stepping to the squad 6 captain quarters. I took in a deep breath before knocking on the door.

"Come in."

I heard that captain say. I opened and closed the door quickly as I entered. Captain Kuchiki was filling out some paperwork. He stopped for a moment, looked up, then back down to continue writing.

"Take a seat."

He ordered. Nodding I sat down without a word. Minutes passed before he finished whatever it was he had been writing. Setting it aside, he put his pen down and looked at me.

"Can I help you?"

He asked.

"Captain."

I spoke bowing my head.

"Please forgive my rudeness this afternoon. I guarantee from now on I shall give you my complete undivided attention during meetings and thoroughly carry out any tasks assigned to me without complaints."

I kept my head down even after I had finished talking. Byakuya didn't say anything for a few minutes.

"What brought about this change?"

He questioned. I shook my head.

"I just can't... let my brother down."

I stated.

"Raise your head."

Picking my head up, I looked the captain in the eye.

"Very well then. Tomorrow, stop by my office first thing to receive your orders. You are dismissed for the rest of the day."

"Thank you for your time and kindness captain."

I said with one last bow as I stood up and left the room. I sighed. Never once in my life had I ever bowed my head to anyone and having to do so now was painful.

'Whatever... Now I have to get up early tomorrow. I have some time before dinner, I'll take a nap.'

I thought, heading over to my room. As I walked in, I tripped over the chair that was next to my bed and in front of my desk. I cursed a bit as I moved it out of the way. Once in bed, I found I was exhausted from walking around all day. Not really doing much, but still. I couldn't wait for dinner with nii-san. He would probably come up with something weird to eat again. I laughed to myself as I remembered the soup with mashed potatoes and noodles.

'That's Toshi-kun for you.'

With that final thought, I feel asleep.

~ ~ ~Toshiro~ ~ ~

I looked at the clock which read 9:30PM. I was going to take Nayami to dinner tonight, but by the looks of it, she had probably forgotten and fallen asleep again.

'Oh well, maybe some other time.'

I thought, walking out of my room. I started my way to the cafeteria so I could get a little snack for Nayami when she decided to wake up and eat.

On my way there, I passed Byakuya.

"It seems you spoke to your sister."

He stated. I stopped walking to speak with him for a moment.

"Yeah, if you have any more problems, tell me and I'll talk to her."

"I don't think there will be anymore problems. By the looks of it, she desperately wants to please you."

I looked him in the eye.

"What do you mean?"

I asked, curious.

"She stopped by my office earlier to give her apologies as to her recent behavior. When I inquired on why she decided to change her ways so suddenly, she replied with 'I can't let my brother down'. It seems the two of you have a close relationship."

I smiled.

"Yeah, something like that. Please look after her for me."

He turned and began walking.

"I won't let her get into trouble."

With that he left.

~•~○~Byakuya~○~•~

'Nayami... what kind of person are you truly?'

I thought as I walked into squad 4's captains' office.

"Oh Captain Kuchiki, a pleasure it is to see you again."

Captain Unohana greeted. I nodded.

"Is there anything I can help you with?"

"I need a profile background of my third seat Nayami Hitsuguya."

"What for, might I ask?"

She questioned, motioning to one of her squad members.

"There is something I would like to into involving her in particular."

She nodded, taking a folder from the person she had sent off.

"Well, this is it. You may keep it with you. If you need anything else, please let me know."

"Thank you."

I spoke, taking the folder and leaving.

Once I was back in my office, I sat down and opened the folder and began reading of her past.

'During her days in the academy, Nayami generally never showed enthusiasm during training, although she had great power. She was teased by many people and got into fights and arguments often. When questioned as to why she did so, her reply was generally the same 'People are stupid and deserved to be treated like the idiots they are'. Her temper escalated to the point where she was about to be banned from ever entering the academy again. Only when her older brother and only known living relative Toshiro Hitsuguya showed up did she begin working harder. It is known that, as a child, Nayami was abused and abandoned until her brother found her and convinced her to join the 13 Court Guard Squads. She is conservative and unless she respects them, generally cold and uninterested.'

I sighed and sat back in my chair. In the photo in the folder, she looked a bit angry and disturbed

'This explains very little, but helps out somewhat as to why she is the way she is.'

Closing the folder, I set it off to the side and pulled out a few papers from one of my desk drawers. I looked at the title of the papers that read 'Transfer Sheet: Nayami Hitsuguya'. I put the papers in the bottom drawer and locked it.

'I'll give her another chance.'

I pulled out a few more papers that needed Nayami's signature. They were over today's meeting and needed one of each of my squad member's signature, but since she left... Well I had made her left, she didn't sign it...

Thinking about it now, the words I spoke seemed to weigh themselves on my mind and I felt a bit guilty after learning more about her past.

I pushed the thought away. This wasn't any of my concern. My duty was as a captain of the 13 Court Guard Squads and that's all I should focus on.

"I should get this to Nayami before she goes to bed for the night."

I said to myself before heading out of my office.

~ ~ ~Nayami~ ~ ~

The room I was now in was as cold as ice. My whole body felt numb and deprived of heat. I felt around trying to find a wall or something solid that could lead me out of the room, but I couldn't find any. The only thing I could see was my own body.

"Hello? Is anyone out there?"

I called with no answer. I sat down where I was. I felt so alone being like this. There were no distractions to keep my mind wondering. I could feel my sanity slowly slipping as the silence began to settle in. It began to get comfortable before the sound of a gentle footfall came to my ears.

I jolted up and looked around. Slowly, a figure came into view.

"Toshiro!"

I jumped at the sight of my brother. Running up to him, I dropped to my knees and threw my arms around his neck, grateful that I was no longer alone.

"I'm sorry Nayami, did you wait for me?"

He asked, putting his arms around me.

"It's alright; it only matters that your here now."

I replied, looking at him with a smile. He smiled back, but for some reason, it didn't have its' normal, happy charm. Examining his face, I could tell he had an ulterior motive.

"Nii-san..."

He shushed me and pulled me back into the hug, a bit tighter this time.

"Just relax, I've got you now."

He stated, tightening his hold on me.

"I... I can't breathe, Toshiro!"

I heard him smirk.

"Toshiro sto- AH!"

I felt him bite down on my neck and I could feel warm blood flow out. I pushed my hands between us in an attempt to get him away from me. I managed to push us a few inches apart. Toshiro looked me in the eye now.

"You... You would deny your own brother?"

He asked, giving me one of his sad looks.

"Toshiro I..."

He smirked.

"You know, you don't have to be... just my sister."

I felt his hand travel down the side of my body. My instincts began kicking in and I knew I had to get away. I tried to push him off, but he was too strong. He chuckled and attempted to get closer to me.

"Nooooo!"

I screamed, jolting up in bed. My heart pounded in my ears and I couldn't breathe. The room around me began to spin and I felt dizzy. As I was trying to catch my breath, the door to my room flew open and Captain Kuchiki ran in.

"What happened?"

He asked, on the alert. I tried to catch my breath to tell him it was all just a dream, but my breath got caught in my throat and I began choking. I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Try to calm down and relax when you breathe."

He spoke calmly as he sat at my side. For some reason, having Byakuya at my side comforted me. I relaxed enough to get my breath back to normal.

"Are you alright?"

He asked.

"Yes captain, thank you."

"What happened?"

He questioned. I blushed a bit.

"I-I'm sorry I startled you captain, I had a horrible dream and I guess it kind of got to me."

He nodded.

"Don't worry about it; I was on my way over here anyways."

"Did you need something?"

I questioned.

"... It can wait until morning. You have a fever; you should take it easy right now. Wash you face off and drink some water and you will feel better."

He spoke as he placed his hand on my forehead.

"Um... Right. Thank you captain."

He nodded.

"I'll see myself out."

With that, he left the room. I stared at the door for a few minutes, part of me hoping that he would come back. I blushed at my thoughts.

Pushing that aside, I got up and did as Byakuya had suggested and washed my face off. The water from the bathroom faucet was cold, but relaxing. I cupped my hands and filled them with water. After drinking water, I walked over to the desk that sat by my bed. Turning on the lamp, I pulled out a paper and some paints. I took in a deep breath and let my hands draw the image in my mind.

The picture took about 15 minutes to complete. When it was done, I took a look at it and blushed. I had drawn a picture of the captain.

'T-that's embarrassing.'

I shook my head and set the picture in an empty frame I had in my desk. Afterwards, I wrapped it up.

'I'll give it to him as an apology.'

I thought, turning off my lamp. I lay back on my bed and laughed to myself as sleep finally came to me. I didn't know why, but I felt like tomorrow was going to be a good day.

~•~○~Byakuya~○~•~

After leaving Nayami's, I felt somewhat happy. I had to stop and think about why that was. I was worried when I heard her scream and, when I found out that there was nothing there, I felt relieved. Sitting by her side made me want to smile. I never thought of her as anything more that a subordinate, but now it seemed as I couldn't see her as just that.

I sighed, finally sitting down in my office.

There was a knock at the door. Quickly, I sat up straight and began working on paperwork.

"Come in."

I spoke. Renji entered.

"Here is the last of the paperwork captain. If that is all, may I retire to my chambers for the night?"

He asked as he handed me the paperwork.

"Thank you. That will be all. In the morning, stop by my office first thing to receive your orders."

"Yes Captain Kuchiki."

He spoke before leaving. I sighed once more and sat back again after he left.

'Nayami...'

I shook my head.

"I need some sleep."

I said to myself as I got back to looking at more paperwork.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~Next Morning.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

~ ~ ~Nayami~ ~ ~

The next morning, I got up early and was on my way to the captain's office. I held onto my pocket that contained the picture. I was nervous about giving it to him and considered heading back when a meeting was called. I sighed and started on my way to the meeting room. I was one of the first people there. I took my usual seat by the window. The air was colder than yesterday. It relaxed me.

A few minutes passed before the captain walked in. I blushed and the picture began to feel like it weighed several thousand pounds. It was hard to concentrate on what was going on in the meeting.

Several times, I noticed, that Byakuya would look over at me to be sure that I was paying attention. Each time he did, my stomach would churn a bit and I would feel like smiling.

'When you think about it, these meetings aren't that bad to listen to.'

I thought.

"That concludes today's meeting. You are all dismissed."

With that, everyone began walking out. I got up and walked over to where the captain was.

"I was surprised to see that you were paying attention during the meeting."

He said, looking down at me. I never noticed before the difference in our heights. I smiled.

"I'm full of surprises."

I stated happily. His eyebrow arched and he gave me a confused look.

"Oh, it's nothing."

I replied with a blush.

"Captain, I delivered the paperwork as you asked."

Renji said as he walked over to the captain. I took a step back and let them talk for a moment. The room was empty by now, well, except for Renji, the captain and I.

"Good work Abarai. There are some papers on my desk that you need to fill out. Please do so."

"Yes Captain."

Renji said with a bow before he left.

I stared after him for a moment.

"Nayami."

The captain called. I jumped.

"Y-yes sir?"

I asked.

"Do you want your orders now or are you going to go by my office later?"

He asked.

"Um... If it's alright, I'd like to receive them now."

I replied. He nodded. I listened to my instructions quietly.

"Is that understood?"

I nodded.

"Then please get to work."

I nodded again and was about to leave when I remembered the picture in my pocket. Swallowing the lump in my throat, I faced that captain once more.

"Um... Captain?"

I asked. He looked up from some paperwork he had with him. Reaching inside my pocket, I pulled out the picture.

"T-This is for you as an apology for everything."

I held it out to him with a shaky hand. He took it and opened it up. He stared at it for a moment.

"Did you draw this?"

He questioned.

"Yeah; I've always had a knack for these things."

I said with a smile.

"It's nice. Thank you."

He said, setting it down on a desk.

"I'll be going now."

I stated, taking my leave. I felt more relieved after having given him the picture.

'That went better than expected.'

I thought, on my way to do as I was told.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~Lunch.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

By the time lunch rolled around, I was exhausted. Never before had I done so much running around. Even now, I still wasn't finished. I had to go to each captain and collect paperwork which I was then to fill out and file accordingly.

'I thought that was Renji's job...'

I groaned as I slumped over my lunch table. I was hungry, but too tired to get up to get something to eat.

"Hey Nayami-san!"

I looked up at the sound of my name. Hisagi stood at my side, along with Izuru and Rangiku. I groaned in response and turned back over to hide my face.

"Looks like someone's a bit tired."

Rangiku stated, pushing me over to take a seat at my side.

"Yeah, I heard you were actually working today."

Hisagi laughed.

"Oh, aren't you guys kind."

I said sarcastically.

"Come on guys, Nayami tries."

Izuru stated. I smiled.

"Nice to know someone cares."

I said, sitting up. Almost as soon as I spotted the food in front of everyone, my stomach began to growl.

"Ugh..."

My head fell forward and landed with a 'thud' on the table.

"Ow..."

I heard Rangiku giggle and Hisagi laugh.

"Are you alright?"

Izuru asked. He was the only one who actually cared.

"No... My tummy hates me."

"Maybe because you never feed it."

I brightened up instantly at the sound of my brother's voice.

"Toshiro!"

I smiled, sitting up. Toshiro pulled up a chair and sat at the edge of our booth.

"Here, eat up. I already ate."

He said as he pushed a tray in front of me.

"I love you~ !"

I said with a smile as I began to eat.

"Yeah captain, she loves you~"

Rangiku re-stated.

"Keep quiet Rangiku. Nai-chan, you didn't eat dinner last night either, did you?"

He asked. I froze while eating my sandwich. I swallowed what was in my mouth and set it down.

"I'm so sorry Toshi, I crashed last night."

He smiled.

"It's alright. I'm just glad to see that you're not getting in trouble for once."

I smiled back.

"Please, I'm not that much of a troublemaker."

He laughed at this.

"Anyways, I'd love to stay and chat, but I need to finish some paperwork."

I nodded.

"I'll go visit you later."

I said as he got up. He nodded and walked off.

~•~○~Byakuya~○~•~

As I was going through some paperwork, Renji walked in.

"Excuse me captain, I received a letter that was told to be handed in to you as soon as possible."

He spoke while handing me an envelope.

"Thank you; please return to your work."

With a bow, he left. I opened the envelope and pulled out some papers that were inside. They had the mark of the Kuchiki family. I read the letter.

'My dear son, we are having our annual family gathering and would like for you to return home with us so that we may catch up on lost time. We would be ever so delighted if you were accompanied by a guest.

-Best Regards, Your Grandfather'

I sighed.

'So it's that time of year again... Why does grandfather always want me to bring someone? That man... Who could I bring? There's no one I could trust to be civilized enough to get through one dinner with my family.'

While I was thinking about it, I happened upon the picture Nayami had painted. I grabbed it.

'Nayami? I don't think she's that type of person...'

I sighed. Considering all the options, if I had to choose, I'd want someone from my squad and there weren't too many females here. Nayami's the only one I really talked and it was only a few words here and there. I didn't really have time to think about it.

'The dinner is tomorrow. I'll take my chances with Nayami.'

I sighed and got back to work.

'I'll ask her before the day is over.'

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~Night~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

~ ~ ~Nayami~ ~ ~

I sighed happily as I sat down on the couch in Toshiro's office.

"You finished your work I take it?"

He asked.

"Yup! And I'm glad I did. I never knew there was so much to do in just one day."

I replied.

"Yeah, but guess what, you got the easy job."

I stared at him wide-eyed.

"You mean there're harder ones?"

He smirked.

"Haven't you noticed I'm always doing paperwork?"

I pretend fainted. He laughed at this.

"I won't be done here until late in the night. Go on and get something to eat without me."

"Are you sure? I can bring you back something."

I said, sitting up. He smiled.

"Don't worry about it. Besides, I had a big lunch, I'm not hungry now."

I smiled back.

"Alright then, if you need me just let me know."

I said as I left.

"Hey Nayami!"

Rangiku greeted as I passed her in the hall.

"Oh, hey Rangiku. I'm going to get some dinner, want to come with?"

"No thanks. I have to help the captain finish some paperwork."

I nodded.

"Alright then, if you say so."

With a smile and a wave, she left and I was back on my way to the cafeteria.

'I wonder what I should eat... Hm... It's Friday so they should be serving steak and potatoes... yeah, yeah that sounds good...'

With my eyes closed, I tried to imagine the taste of it and the smell. That was, until I ran into someone.

"I-I'm sorry, I should have been watching where I was going!"

I said, bowing down. Peaking up, I noticed it was Byakuya.

"Oh Captain, it's you."

Standing up, I smiled.

"Were you going to get something to eat as well?"

He looked at me. My smile faltered and I felt stupid.

"I-I'm sorry, it's really none of my-"

"No, I was looking for you."

I looked at him dumbfounded.

"E-Excuse me?"

I asked.

"I need to speak with you about something. Please follow me to my office."

I nodded, not wanting to start an argument with the captain. Several times on the way to his office, my stomach began growling once more. I sighed and tried my best not to think about eating.

'He couldn't let me get something to eat first?'

"Please come in."

He said while holding the door open. I walked in and took a seat. The door closed and Byakuya walked over to take a seat at his desk in front of me.

"Please take a look at this."

He said, handing me a paper. I skimmed over it. It was an invitation to a dinner at the Kuchiki family house.

"Captain, I'm confused. What does this have to do with me?"

He sighed and took the paper back.

"If you paid close attention, you will see my grandfather asked for me to bring a guest. My grandfather can be a bit of an eccentric man. He is always trying to get me to socialize more. He wants me to bring someone with me to the annual family dinner. I..."

He stops for a moment and sighs. I look at him, still a bit confused.

"Nayami, will you go with me to my family dinner?"

He asks. After hearing this, I didn't know how to react. I just sat there, in shock.

"It's not an order, but a request."

'I-Is he really asking me to have dinner with him or is just some kind of prank? He wouldn't really want me of all people to accompany him to something like that would he?'

"If you don't want to go, you can just say 'no'."

He said.

"I-It's not that I don't want to go, it's just that I... I'm a little in shock."

I smiled up at him.

"But, I wouldn't really mind going. Are you sure you want me to go with you though? I'm sure you could find someone else."

He looked down at me, then at the wall.

"I've already thought about it. If I have to take someone, I'd rather they be from my squad. You are one of the very few females on my squad that may be civilized enough to accompany me."

I felt a little down after hearing that.

"Oh... So that's the only reason?"

I asked.

"Of course. My relationship between my subordinates is just that. Nothing more."

I felt used even though I hadn't agreed to anything yet.

"I-I don't know. I'll have to think about it. I'll let you know tomorrow. If that is all, captain, I'll take my leave."

With that, I left to my room.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

I sighed. I laid down over an hour ago and I was still unable to fall asleep. I looked at a clock I had hanging on the wall opposite of my bed. It read back 11:30 PM.

'Isn't that just great?'

I stood up and turned my bedside lamp on. Sitting at my desk, I pulled out a pen and paper and began writing.

Useless… That's all I've ever been.
From birth, until the end.
That's all I'll ever be.
Nothing ever can be done about me.
Why must I even try?
Everything I do is all a lie.
People only think it's fine.
When they use me, before they realize.
All I'll ever be is useless.
I don't want to try any more, it's frivolous.
Just use me and you'll see.
Useless is all I can be.

I sighed and sat back. This was the truth of my reality. How Toshiro could ever see me as useful, I'll never know.

A knock at the door drew my attention. I sighed and got up, wondering who would be up at this time of night.

"Captain, what're you doing here?"

I asked when I opened the door to see Byakuya standing there.

"May I come in?"

He asked. I nodded and opened the door to let him in. He walked in and I closed the door behind him.

"Would you like something to drink?"

I asked out of courtesy. He nodded. I left the room and into the small kitchen that was just a few feet away from the bedroom. I got a cup and filled it with some water from a cooler I had. When I walked back to my room, I found Byakuya reading the poem I had just wrote.

"Please don't read that!"

I shouted, running to get it from him. I slipped on some water, which had splashed out of the glass, and fell. The glass shattered and some of the pieces lodged themselves in my arm.

"Are you alright?"

Byakuya asked, helping me up.

"Y-yeah, I'm fine."

I replied, trying to cover my arm.

"Let me see."

Grabbing my arm, he looked at it.

"I-It's really nothing. You don't have to worry about it."

I looked away.

"It's my job as your Captain to look after you."

Hearing this really pissed my off.

"I don't need you to look after me so just go away!"

I shouted as I walked past him and into the bathroom. I closed the door and ran the water. The warm water burned as I grabbed some tweezers and attempted to pull out the glass shards. Byakuya knocked on the door.

"Go away!"

I said, slightly pained. Despite what I said, he opened the door and walked in anyways.

"Let me help."

I shook my head.

"Don't you have other things to do like Captain stuff?"

I asked, angry. He shut off the water and grabbed a towel from the rack.

"Sit here."

He said, motioning to the sink. Carefully, I jumped up on the sink and sat there. Byakuya grabbed held of my arm. This time, his hands felt more gentle and kind. He grabbed the tweezers from me and began to pull the pieces out. I flinched each time he did.

"It's worse than it looks."

He said.

"What do you care?"

I mumbled.

"More than you think."

He stated. I didn't say anymore. A few minutes passed and the only sound in the room was that of the glass going into the sink.

"What makes you think that you are as useless as you say?"

He asked suddenly.

"What do you mean?"

"That poem you wrote…"

I chose my words carefully.

"Ever since I was little I was told that I was just a useless thing that would never amount to anything. In the academy and even now, that's all I've been told. I don't know why, but Toshiro seems to have so much faith in me… I feel like…. He's just doing it to make up for what our parents did…. I don't…. I don't really think he even wants me here… Sometimes, I feel like, I'm just in the way. I've tried to make myself useful, but it's always ended in failure and disappointment. When I was in the academy, I was almost kicked out for getting into it with my teacher. He told me that I should just give up and stop trying. I didn't know what happened after that. My anger spiked and everything went black. Toshiro, to this day, still won't tell me what happened."

Byakuya was quiet while he worked. He stopped for a moment.

"I'm sorry."

He said.

"For what?"

I asked.

"It seems I too have called you useless before. I'm sorry. It may always be hard to make yourself seemed useful in the eyes of your peers, but just by you trying to help, you're being useful. As long as you try."

I smiled.

"Thanks Captain. About tomorrow-"

"If you'd rather not go than don't. What I said earlier, I didn't exactly mean it like it came out. What I should have said was that I'd rather go with you since I've spoken to you a bit more than any other woman here. My grandfather is an eccentric man, as I have said before. I think he would enjoy meeting a person like you. Although we are a noble family, he still enjoys acting a little immature every now and then."

He said as he turned on faucet and began washing my cuts one more time.

"I'll go."

I said. Byakuya looked at me.

"Are you sure?"

I nodded.

"Yeah. It's my thanks to you for helping me."

I smiled. Surprisingly, he smiled back. Seeing this, I couldn't help but blush a bit.

"Do you have a bandage?"

He asked.

"Yeah, there's one in the drawer there."

I pointed at the direction of the bottom left drawer of the sink. He pulled it out and used it to wrap my arm.

"You're good at this."

I complemented.

"I used to get hurt a lot when I was a child. My grandfather would always clean me up afterwards. I learned from him."

I smiled.

"That should do it."

He said, tying the bandage in place. I attempted to push myself off the sink, but my arm hurt too much and I slipped. Byakuya caught me and held me up.

"Are you alright?"

I asked.

"Y-Yes, thank you."

I blushed and moved away from him.

"I cleaned up the glass and water for you in the other room."

He said as we walked out.

"T-Thanks. You didn't have to."

He smiled again.

'Boy, I must be dreaming…'

"I'll see you tomorrow morning in my office for you to receive your orders."

I nodded.

"Until tomorrow, Captain."

I smiled as I walked him out. Closing the door, I sighed.

'I knew today was going to be a good day!'

I laughed to myself and turned off my lamp. After turning off my lamp, I settled down in bed and quickly fell asleep.

~•~○~Byakuya~○~•~

I got to my room and sighed as I took off my shoes and began getting ready for bed. I felt unusually satisfied with myself right now. Nayami was… someone of interest.

'I don't really know what it is…. But something about Nayami makes me want to smile.'

I smiled again just thinking about the way she smiled sometimes. I'd seen her smile before when she was with her brother. Something about her smile was really alluring.

As I turned out the lights and laid down, I realized, all I could think about was tomorrow. It wasn't seeing my family, it was being with Nayami. I didn't know how it would turn out, but I had a good feeling about it.

'Nayami… What kind of surprises will you show me tomorrow?'

For the first time in a long time, I fell to sleep with a smile on my face.