Zuko blows a mouthful of fire into his hands to warm them. As much fun as the festival at Katara and Sokka's home was, he could never get used to extreme cold. Why they never had a fire going was always beyond him – and how Toph could see anything without any exposed earth was always a mystery. But it was nice to see his friends again, and he hadn't seen Aang since before he'd gone on his journey into the spirit world to rebuild its connection to the physical world.
As he walks through Sokka's still very freshly built, but quite brilliant ice house – more than an igloo, but not really a palace – and into the living space, he finds himself warmed by the sight of his friends, sitting around a slab of ice posing as a table, each with wooden cups in their hands, laughing at some joke which no doubt has Sokka involved – either as the teller, or as a punchline from Toph.
"Zuko!" Aang grins at one end of the table, "You're late!"
"I was held up by a mob of penguin-otters."
"No excuses, Firelord Crabby!" Sokka stands and slings an arm over Zuko's shoulder, "Pull up a cushion and pour yourself a drink!"
"Sokka's drunk already," Toph says, "Lightweight!"
"I'm celebrating! With the spirits!"
"The spirits do not care about you being made Chief, Sokka."
"But I care," he grins.
Zuko grins and takes a seat between Aang and Suki.
"It's good to see you, Avatar Aang," he says.
"And you, Firelord Zuko," Aang replies with his buoyant grin, and with that they fall into easy conversation, catching each other up with what has been happening in their lives since the last time they saw each other.
"Still no fire lady?" Aang asks after a while. Zuko shakes his head. In the ten years since he took the title of Firelord, he's faced a lot of pressure to marry – particularly to produce an heir to the title. It has been seven years since he and Mai split after they realised that their personalities, rather than complementing each others, only drove each other further into a pit of anger and depression. Since then, he hadn't met anyone. No one that he could really love, no one he could see himself with forever, no one who made his heart sing. No one who could make him hers, and he could make his, anyway.
"Why, have you got someone in mind?"
"Sure, I'll set you up with an air acolyte."
"Uh," Zuko stares at the wall across from him, "That wouldn't... I mean... I... uh... No. Thank you, but no."
"Aww, air acolytes not good enough for you?"
"I just still know that most of the air acolytes are just raving Aang fans."
"Wonderful people," Aang laughs. The conversation is interrupted by Katara,
"Uh, everyone, I have an announcement to make," she says gently, and everyone at the table turns to look at her expectantly, "I, uh, I haven't told anyone yet, so it's news for everyone," she says, her eyes flicking towards Aang, "I... um... I'm going to have a baby."
There's a great intake of breath throughout the room. Zuko's eyes flick from Katara's belly – which gives no hint of her condition due to the furs she's wearing – and the table, which he suddenly notices does not have a wooden liquor cup for Katara as it does for the others.
On the other side of Aang, Toph bursts into raucous laughter,
"Good job, Twinkletoes!" she cries, slapping him on the back in congratulations.
"But- but- but, you two aren't married yet!" Sokka cries.
Aang's cup hits the table quite suddenly,
"We'll be married by the time the baby comes," he says quietly before looking at her, "You should have told me first, Katara."
"I-" she starts, but Aang stands and leaves the room. Suddenly, the place seems even colder than it was before and silence falls over the gathering. Katara wrings her hands together for a moment, looking around the table. Her eyes catch Zuko's for a moment, but just a moment, before she turns to chase after her fiancé.
At the table, feeling awkward, Zuko downs what's left in his cup and pours another.
"Aang!"
Aang turns on Katara, glaring. He scans her up and down as she closes the bedroom door. His eyes pause at her midriff, and his head feels like it swells as he thinks of what's in there.
"How could you?"
"I didn't-"
"I'm twenty-two, Katara, I know how babies are made!" he yells.
"Please, shh," Katara whispers, looking worriedly at the door.
"What, don't you want them to hear? You don't want them to hear that you..." his voice breaks and he falls onto the bed, "And we've never..." he sighs, "how could you?" he repeats. Katara clutches at her furs, tears in her eyes.
"I'm so sorry."
"I don't understand."
"I... you said you might never come back, Aang."
"But I have. You should have-"
"I should have what, Aang? Waited? I did wait. I did. It's been two years since you left! I thought... I thought you weren't... I thought you'd..." she sobs, "And I was alone-"
"I was alone!"
"You chose that! You wanted to go to the spirit world alone! I thought you were never coming back! You said that you might! And so I..." she trails off, not wanting to go into the details. Aang's face crumples, his chest feeling like something is wrapped around it, squeezing, crushing.
"Do I know him?" he says quietly after a minute. Katara shakes her head vigorously.
"No! No, of course not!"
"Are you sure it's not-"
"It's not anyone. It was a fling, it was never meant to happen, and..."
"Why did you do it in front of everyone? How could you do that?"
"I thought... I thought it would be easier if you didn't have to hear it alone."
"Everyone thinks it's mine. How can we...?" he sighs, "I don't know how to deal with this."
"You don't have to. The baby isn't yours."
"But everyone thinks it is... and..." Aang rubs his face, aware that they are shaking, "and I still love you."
"But-"
"You're not doing this alone. I... I can be a dad," he says, his voice catching when he sees her place a protective hand over her front, "I can. I'll do it."
This isn't going to be easy, and he knows that. He knows that he'll always wonder who this child's father is. He knows that he'll be forever wondering if their smile belongs to him. He knows he'll always wonder if her heart belonged to him, too.
But the child doesn't deserve to go without a father, without safety. And he really does still love her.
And maybe he'll grow to forgive her.
"Pregnant." Sokka mutters to Suki that night, their room lit dimly by one candle in the corner, "Pregnant. My baby sister is pregnant."
"She's not so much a baby, Sokka."
"She's always a baby. She's always my baby sister, anyway."
"She's always been a mother, though. Who looked after everyone during the war?"
"I know, but... it just seems weird... should we-"
"Whoa! I am not ready for that conversation! We're not in a war anymore, Sokka, we don't need to breed so much."
"Don't you want kids, though?"
"Maybe! But not right this second – just because your sister is pregnant doesn't mean you have to go and have a baby! We have a lot more fun to have," she grins, tapping his nose and kissing him.
"Right," he grins back at her, "It is weird, though, right?"
"A little, I guess. I thought they'd get married first," Suki says, resting her head on Sokka's chest, "Did... did Aang seem upset?"
"I am so glad someone else picked up on that! What was up with that!?"
"I don't know... maybe he wishes she'd told him personally, first. Or maybe... no, never mind, that's crazy!" she laughs, a touch more crazily than would probably be normal. Sokka frowns into the dimness.
"What?"
"Oh, it's nothing! Like I said, it's crazy!"
"No, what was it?" he asks, and she doesn't say anything, "Seriously."
"Oh, it was just a... silly, errant thought, you know? Those ideas that come from no-where but don't actually mean anything, it's nothing."
"So what was it, then?"
"I just thought, I mean, the only other reason I can think of someone being that upset would be... y'know..."
"I really don't."
"Well... I mean... if the baby... wasn't his," she says slowly. Sokka stares at the ceiling,
"What? Suki, are you crazy?"
"I said it was crazy!"
"There's no way that could happen!"
"I know!"
"Where did that even come from!?" Sokka's laughing now, curling around Suki in his hysterical fit.
"I said I don't know – just a random, senseless thought!"
"You're insane, Suki," he laughs, kissing her.
"Yeah, well, you love me, so there must me something terribly wrong with you, too."
Katara looks down at her swollen belly, bulging over the bathwater. In the months since she told everyone, she's felt that she could see herself growing day by day, now it feels like she can see herself growing by the minute. She smiles and places a hand over the bump protectively,
'I love you, my baby boy,' she thinks. She's sure it's a boy, though she's only told Aang of this conviction. He wants to name him Bumi.
"Bumi was your best friend," Katara had said guiltily.
"And my son will be, too," Aang had replied.
He was trying so hard to be a good father already, and it broke Katara's heart. Because she could see him break a little every time he looked at the bump, every time she accidentally proclaimed that the baby was kicking. She lets her head fall back, her hair swirling around in the water. If she's honest with herself, she's not completely sure that she's doing the right thing. Of course she loves Aang, but to make him raise someone else's child... her mind flicks back to the night of it all,
'You are so beautiful,' he'd said.
'Wait, I need to know,' she'd said, pausing him, despite her hands running over his skin, 'is this a fling for you, or-'
'I love you,' he'd interrupted, 'I have for a long time. I have since...'
Her eyes flick open as she feels something in her stomach, something like churning, boiling. She gasps and clutches both hands around the bulge,
"No, no no no. You can't, please, you can't," she whispers, willing with every fibre of her being, "You can't. I'm so sorry, my baby, I'm so sorry, you can't. He'll find out, he'll know, you have to stop..."
As the child settles, she sighs, shaking.
'If only I had waited just a little longer.'
"What are you doing here?"
From the bottom of the steps, Zuko looks up to look into the eyes of the woman who has asked him the question in a very hushed, hurried tone. She is now very, very pregnant. He bounces up the steps of the air temple rooms.
"Hello, Katara, how are you feeling?"
"Aang's not here."
"I know," Zuko nods, "He sent me here to check on you – he's worried you're going to go into labour."
"I told him I'd send a message if that happens. I'm fine. You can tell him that," she says and slowly turns to retreat back inside. Zuko's smile drops from his face. He's not used to this coldness from her, not since he first tried to join them during the war. True, he hasn't seen her for months, but he's been in Republic City, and she's been at the south pole until recently. He chases after her,
"Why are you avoiding me?"
"I'm not. Of course I'm not!" she says shrilly, "I'm just... tired. Pregnancy makes you very tired."
"You are!" he quickly steps in front of her, but she turns her head away, refusing to look at him. Zuko's eyes widen, his scar pulling, "It's not Aang's, is it?"
Almost imperceptibly, and still not looking at him, Katara shakes her head.
It's like all the air is forced out of him. His heart thumps loudly against his chest. He wonders if she can hear it, too. He gulps, his mouth dry, and huskily asks,
"Is it mine?"
Just as imperceptibly as before, Katara nods.
Zuko hiccups and slides down to the ground, resting on his knees. His breathing is shallow and laboured.
"Why didn't you tell me?" he chokes.
"I didn't know how, and... I didn't want to risk Aang finding out. This is hard enough as it is, if he found out it was you... who knows what would happen?"
Zuko reaches out a hand towards the bump that houses his baby, but there's something that stops him from touching her.
"You should... we could have... we could have been a family."
"Aang and I were engaged, Zuko."
"But that... that's my child. Yours and mine, ours together!"
"I know, I know, I'm so sorry. But think of everything that will fall apart if he finds out, the United Republic, Republic City, the spirit world – what happens to all of them when the Avatar finds out that his fiancée cheated on him with his best friend and counsel?"
"I should never have let go, I knew it. I wanted to hold on to you forever. Keep you safe. I should have asked you then..." Zuko mumbles, his voice quietening with every word until he's mumbling so quietly that he can barely hear himself, and Katara probably can't either. He stands, "It wasn't cheating," he says suddenly and clearly, "It wasn't, we thought he was gone. I loved you. I love you."
"Oh," Katara sobs, and suddenly they're in each other's arms, lips meeting. One of Zuko's hands rests protectively over Katara's abdomen, the other holds her as close to him as he dares.
As they part, their foreheads rest together, and Katara shakes her head,
"I'm so sorry, Zuko. The world can't afford the him finding out."
"I know."
"I loved you, too."
"I know."
"We... we can't see each other again. Not ever. I can't..."
"I know," Zuko says deeply, resignedly. Katara steps away from him, bows her head, and walks through a doorway. As she starts to close the door, Zuko calls out,
"Wait!" he says, and Katara looks at him expectantly. He hesistates, "Wh-what is it? A boy or a girl?Do you know? You're the best healer in the world, I thought you might-."
"A boy," Katara interrupts, "The baby is a boy."
She closes the door and Zuko stands there, stunned for a moment.
"A son," he whispers.
It wasn't until the year after the death of Lord Zuko that Bumi figured out where all those extra birthday gifts came from.