AN: This is my first story, and it sprang from the desire to explore some of the criticisms I've had while watching and reading Fairy Tail. It's my favorite series, but I've never been completely comfortable with how some of the female characters were treated, especially poor Lucy. I wanted a female character that was brash, rowdy, and unapologetically so (the likes of which animation hasn't encountered since Korra from LoK), so I thought it would be fun to explore how Natsu would interact with the world if he had been written as a female character. Therefore, I took the liberty. I tried to make Natsumi as in-character as possible, and I hope I haven't let anyone down or offended anyone in the process!
This story takes place in an AU after the Grand Magical Games arc, but all events leading up to that are identical (Tenrou Island, the Battle of Fairy Tail, etc.). From there, it diverges into what I've written.
Enjoy!
It's a Bird! It's a Train! No, it's an Idiot in an Asshole Costume
September 1, X777
Laxus couldn't believe the Old Man. He knew that he was probably going senile in his old age, but that was no reason, in Laxus's opinion, to open up an orphanage. He'd thought it was weird when he took in that girl Cana a few years ago when she came in whining about finding her dad, but she was quiet and stayed out of his way, so he looked past it. Then there was that mouthy kid that was constantly taking his damn clothes off, which was way creepy for an eleven year old.
He even kept quiet when Erza came along the year before. She was just as obnoxious as the rest of them, but she was talented and she kept the nudist kid in line, so he could at least tolerate her most of the time.
But he knew this kid was going to be a pain in the ass.
She stood a few inches shorter than Gramps, glaring up at everyone as he introduced her as Natsumi Dragneel, the newest guild member. She was covered in dirt and bruises, and her ostentatious pink hair stuck out in all directions, smeared with what he hoped was mud. The kid, though he couldn't tell how old she was, looked half-wild, and the way she was mean-mugging everyone immediately pissed him off.
"Welcome to Fairy Tail, Natsumi," Erza said as she walked up to the girl, towering over her. "What brings you to our guild?"
The shrimp looked her up and down, then gave her a loud sniff. What a fucking weirdo.
"I'm looking for my father, Igneel," she said, her voice chirpy and high.
Great. Another kid with daddy issues. He swore Gramps was making a collection.
"Oh?" Erza said, eyes widening. "Well I'm sure we could help you find him. What's he like?"
The kid's eyes lit up. "Well, he's the best! He taught me all the magic I know! He's the smartest, fastest, strongest dad ever!"
Everyone laughed at her enthusiasm, but it made Laxus want to gag. Her old man was probably dead. That, or he'd taken off, just like Laxus's own had.
"I'm sure he is," Macao said from his seat at one of the tables. "But could you give us a physical description?"
She nodded vigorously, her hair bobbing up and down. "He's huge and red, almost as big as the guild hall! He's got shiny scales and sharp claws and breathes fire—"
"Is this kid serious?" Laxus couldn't contain himself, walking up to the crowd. "What the hell are you even talking about?" he sneered at the slip of a girl.
She glared at him, "I'm talking about Igneel!"
"Your father's a giant lizard? I thought my old man was a drag."
"Take that back!" she shouted, and Gramps had to grab hold of the stupid white scarf she wore to keep her from attacking Laxus. "Don't call Igneel a lizard, you jerk! He's the King of the Fire Dragons and he'd roast you alive for saying something like that!"
He laughed at her. "Sure, kid."
"Are you sure you aren't confused, Natsumi?" Erza asked. "No one has seen a dragon in—"
"I'm not confused and I'm not lying! Igneel's my dad and he taught me Dragon Slayer Magic!"
"And I'm the long-lost Prince of Fiore," Gray spat out from behind Erza, struggling out of his shirt.
"I'm telling the truth!"
"Stop lying! No one believes you!" the shirtless boy yelled at her.
"Oh yeah? Well how about this?! Fire Dragon's Roar!"
Erza ducked in surprise as a huge fireball erupted from the tiny girl's mouth. Gray wasn't as quick, and was thrown backward into the table where Macao and Wakaba had been playing cards with Cana. Laxus blinked. Well, that was something.
"Dragon Slayer Magic, huh?" he asked the kid, quirking one blonde eyebrow.
"I told you," she grumbled, crossing her thin arms over a heavily bandaged midsection.
"Was a party trick like that supposed to scare me, Flame Brain?!" Gray yelled, standing up on the table. "Ice Make Lance!" he shouted, and shot a barrage of sharp spears toward the girl.
The girl nimbly dodged the projectiles and rushed toward the boy, "Fire Dragon's Iron Fist!" she slugged him with an ignited right hook, dropping him. As Gray got back up into his Maker Stance, Laxus caught the look his grandfather shot him.
Of course. Now that the Old Man accepted the new brat, Laxus was stuck playing babysitter. Perfect.
As he walked over to the brawling children, Macao and Wakaba cleared out, an alarmed Cana following behind him. Gray and the new menace were about to throw haymakers at each other when he acted, engulfing them both in a pillar of golden sparks.
Both kids dropped. Gray moaned softly, then rolled off the edge of the table with a loud clunk. The girl lay motionless, her back to Laxus. He scoffed. For all that bluster, she sure was a lightweight. Now he was going to get an earful from Gramps about overdoing it. Moving closer, he was about to poke her in the side when she shot up, a blinding smile on her face.
He stepped back, eyes widening.
"That was awesome! You use Lightning Magic?! That was so cool!" she stood and waved her arm in the air.
"Uh…yeah, sure. Whatever," he said, not sure how to respond to this girl's apparent excitement at getting her ass handed to her.
"I'm serious! Come on, do it again. Fight me!" she put her tiny fists up, pantomiming punches.
She couldn't be serious. What was Gramps thinking when he picked up this psycho?
"Not going to happen, Pinky. I'd crush you as easily as I did now."
Her determined expression didn't waver as he spoke, though she did drop her fighting stance.
"Fine. Then I'll get stronger, so you'll have to fight me!" she promised, pointing at him in challenge.
"Don't count on it," he scoffed.
"You'll see, …" she stopped, tilting her head to the side, her shorn hair pointing straight up. "Hey, what's your name, anyway?"
Oh yeah, she was going to be the biggest pain in his ass.
August 28, X791
"Laxus! There you are, you coward!"
The lightning mage in question sighed at his table and chugged the remaining contents of his drink. He'd just paid for the damn thing, and when the impending conflict occurred, it'd just get spilled. Knowing Mira, she'd make him pay full price for another one.
The diminutive fire dragon slayer stomped into the guild, letting the cool night air in through the doors she'd just slammed open. Her teammates followed her in, but once they traced her line of sight to Laxus, they made themselves scarce, Lucy pulling Happy by the tail over to the bar.
Laxus watched her advance with a growing sense of frustrated resignation. She had a fire in her eyes, her long cherry blossom hair billowing behind her in a thick snarl. He swallowed the lump in his throat as she marched toward him, not looking forward to what would be another repeat of what had been close to a weekly occurrence since returning last month from their victory at the Grand Magic Games.
She stopped in front of his table and pointed at him.
"Tonight. Let's go. You and me," she challenged with a determined glare.
He sighed. So it was going to be this same old shit again. Lovely.
"No," he said flatly.
"Yes!"
"I said no. Now leave me alone," he shooed her away with a flick of his hand.
Natsumi slammed her hands down on his table, knocking over his cup like he'd expected. The girl didn't do anything quietly. She leaned forward, glaring, but her intimidation tactic was lost on Laxus, who was still nearly eye level with her, even from his seated position.
"Fight me," she ordered him.
He narrowed his eyes. "Go fight Gray."
She huffed. "I spent the last two days fighting that bastard. I'm here to fight you! Now take that stupid coat off and get ready!"
Laxus shook his head, choosing to ignore her crack about his coat. "Give it up, Nat. I'm not fighting with you. Ever."
Sagging against his table, she whined. "But why?" She drew out the last syllable, her eyes going wide and lip jutting out in an attempt to butter him up. Pushing down the guilt that threatened to surface every time she did this, he remained firm, pulling out his standard excuse.
"You don't see me agreeing to fight Levy, do you? Grow ten inches and then we'll talk."
She flushed with anger. "That's not fair! Of course you wouldn't fight Levy, she's not a combat specialist! Sorry, Levy," she called over to where the Solid Script mage sat with Jet and Droy. The bluenette only smiled and shrugged, waving off the unintentional insult.
The blonde man was tired of having this conversation with her. "Life isn't fair. Get over it."
Natsumi wasn't about to let him get away with the same flimsy excuse he always used, he could tell. "I'm plenty strong enough to take you on!" the pink-haired girl yelled at him.
He was going to have to pull out the big guns, then.
Leaning back in his seat, he smirked at her. "Says the girl who still can't last more than a minute against Erza?"
He watched in amusement as rage overtook her, her face turning a color that rivaled the shade of Titania's hair. "I haven't fought Erza since before the Games! I'm much more powerful now, so get off your ass and fight me!"
God, she was so stubborn. When she'd first insisted on fighting him, he'd found it funny and even a little endearing. But as the weeks went on and she refused to drop it, he only got more irritated, wondering why she wouldn't leave him the fuck alone like he asked, or why it mattered so much to her. He thought he'd been resigned to his fate of being forced to turn her down, but now she was just pissing him off.
Through trying to be nice to the little pest, he narrowed his eyes at her.
"I'm not going to fight you," he told her in a voice that he'd used to talk to small, obstinate children in the past, when he'd been about three seconds from drop-kicking them. "Not now, or tomorrow, or next week. Never. So get it through your fucking iron skull, alright? Leave me alone." Laxus growled out.
"Listen here, buddy, I—"
"I said leave me alone!" he boomed, shooting out of his chair to get in her face.
To her credit, she didn't even flinch, only continued to glare balefully as he snarled at her, inches away. He struggled to hold onto the burn of his anger as they continued their standoff. Her spicy, smoky scent invaded his nose, and his head swam.
When he began to grow worried that he may have to be the first to break in their silent battle, she saved him by pulling away to release a bellow of flame. Screaming in frustration, she kicked the chair immediately to her right, sending it flying, crashing into an unsuspecting bystander.
Luckily for Laxus, that bystander happened to be Gajeel, who'd been holding a sleeping Pantherlily.
"Oi, watch what the fuck you're doing, Salamander!" he shouted, putting Lily down and rolling up his sleeves.
Natsumi, still fuming, glared over at the iron dragon slayer. "Shut up! You should've been paying attention!"
"To what? You getting rejected? I've seen it before, and it's embarrassing," Gajeel taunted. The small girl bristled further.
"Come here and say that to my face, Pinhead!" she threatened.
The black haired man laughed. "Gladly! If Spark Plug won't kick your ass, I'll be happy to put you in your place!" Not waiting for her charge, he activated his magic, sending an iron pole at full speed to where Natsumi stood.
She jumped it easily, landing on top of the pole with the grace of an acrobat, and ran along it to strike a blow of her own, both fists blazing. The dueling dragon slayers soon dissolved into an indiscernible tussle of broken furniture and kicked-up dust. Laxus relaxed, slumping back in chair as he watched them brawl. He almost wished they weren't moving so fast so he could see properly.
She really was enthralling to watch when she fought. He admired how she always went all out in every fight, no matter how thoroughly outmatched she was. Despite being one of the smallest in the guild, the little shit was scarily strong, and could take a beating like no one else he knew, except maybe for Erza. It still baffled him how someone so small could take down the people she had, his mind flashing back to Tenrou Island when she'd dealt the final blow to Hades, and then to the Games, when she'd singlehandedly dispatched Sting and Rogue with seemingly no effort—despite having taken the brunt of their strongest spells. It'd been amazing.
In light of all that, he wasn't surprised to see Gajeel hit the wall after Natsumi clobbered him with a flaming fist.
"Had enough now?" she taunted the older dragon slayer, still sounding pissed.
Her opponent laughed, wiping his forehead. "You wish," he answered her, before the two engaged once again. Laxus knew the iron dragon slayer was fighting a losing battle, though. There was no stopping Natsumi when she was legitimately angry, and Gajeel had no motivation to fight as hard as she was. It'd only be a matter of time, he thought, smirking.
"You know she's only going to get more insistent from here on out, right?" Mira said as she came to refill his glass, snapping him out of his thoughts.
The lightning mage glared at the barmaid. "Mind your own business."
"Why don't you just spar with her? It's not like she's asking for a death match, and it'd make her whole year," the young woman smiled at him, completely ignoring his angry expression.
He snatched the glass out of her hand. The sneak was probably trying to con him into buying another round. "I don't have to explain myself to you."
She laughed. "I guess not. But you're only making things worse by not being honest with her…or yourself." The Takeover mage quirked an eyebrow at him, a hand on her hip.
"I don't know what you're talking about," he spat out, "but if I wanted to be lectured about this shit, I wouldn't have sent Freed home."
"They're just worried about you. So am I, frankly. No one understands why you insist on things being this way."
He was not in the mood for this shit. Mira was nosy on the best of days, and he definitely didn't need her poking around in his brain.
"Whatever," he groused, standing up. "I'm getting out of here while she's still occupied. I'll settle my tab tomorrow morning."
Mirajane pouted, but nodded. There was no use in trying to convince Laxus to do something on anyone's time that wasn't his own. "You won't be able to run from this forever," she said in a low tone as he pushed past her.
He swept out of the guild with one last backward glance to ensure Natsumi hadn't spotted him, not bothering to respond to the barmaid's comment. She didn't know what she was talking about, anyway, and would better served doing her actual job instead of butting into other people's affairs.
As he walked through the cool night air back to his apartment, though, he couldn't stop her words from knocking around his brain.
Maybe he couldn't avoid it forever, but Laxus would be damned if he wasn't going to try.
By the time Natsumi finally managed to knock Gajeel unconscious, the guild was emptying out for the night. She looked around after wiping her bloodied nose and noticed that Laxus was nowhere to be found. Whatever his problem was, she was getting tired of it. She didn't understand why he couldn't just fight her like she asked, even if she wasn't as strong as he was.
It didn't matter if she had to ask him every day for the next year. Sooner or later, she'd get him to fight her, and then he'd regret letting her get so strong in the meantime.
Dusting her hands off, she walked over to the bar where Lucy was eating a bowl of strawberries and ignoring Happy.
"Did you work off your frustration?" her friend asked her dryly as she looked Natsumi up and down, taking in the rips in the girl's vest and the crusted, dried blood around her nose.
Clicking her tongue, the dragon slayer hopped onto a stool beside Lucy, glaring at the counter top. "No. That hunk of junk is a sorry consolation prize. He's almost as bad as Gray."
"Are you sure about that? It's been a while since Gray drew blood. Give Gajeel some credit."
She shrugged and offered her arms to Happy, who readily jumped into them and nuzzled her neck.
"I guess. It was a lucky shot, though. I wasn't paying attention."
"Does it hurt?" Happy asked, pulling back to look up at her with wide, concerned eyes.
She managed a smile for her oldest friend. "Nah. It's not even broken," she reassured. For good measure, she gave him a scratch behind the ears.
"You're lucky, then. Your looks are one of the only things going for you. Lose those and all that'll be left is your personality," Lucy mumbled as she continued munching on the strawberries.
Natsumi stole a handful, ignoring the blonde girl's protests as she shoved them all in her mouth at once.
"That's not very nice, Lucy," Happy admonished. "Are you mad because Natsumi is prettier than you are?"
"I didn't say that! And no, I'm not!" she defended, glaring at the cat.
Swallowing, Natsumi smiled at her friend. "That's okay, Lucy. You can be prettier, I don't mind." She punctuated the statement by stealing another strawberry.
"Your generosity is truly astounding," Lucy remarked in a flat voice.
The dragon slayer shrugged, oblivious to the celestial mage's sarcasm. "Hey, do we have any food at the apartment? I'm hungry."
"I am, too," Happy agreed, rubbing one eye with a tiny paw.
Lucy's eyes widened. "You're eating right now! And we ate dinner before we got back—you still owe me the money for that, by the way." She mentally added that to the ever-growing mountain of Jewels the shorter girl owed her, despite knowing that she'd probably never see any of it. Sometimes she still kicked herself for letting Natsumi move in with her all that time ago, but it'd seemed like the best decision at the time, especially since she and Happy were already there most nights. Plus, it took a strain off the need to make 70,000 Jewel a month by herself just so she could keep her apartment. But even between the two of them, their team's destructive tendencies made footing the bill for their shared rent and Natsumi's extensive grocery needs difficult at the best of times.
"So…" the pink-haired girl blinked at her friend, "does that mean there's food at home, or…?"
"No, there's not! Now let's go before you rack up more of a tab with Mira, if she hasn't already cut you off since the last time."
Without further preamble, the blonde dragged her roommate from her seat and out of the guild before she could get herself into any more trouble, calling a quick goodbye to Mira over her shoulder on the way out.
Once they were out in the coolness of the autumn air, Natsumi felt herself calm down, both from her fight with Gajeel and her standoff with Laxus. With Happy sitting happily on her head and Lucy beside her, she was happy to be with her friends as they all walked home together. She wanted to put the night behind her and look forward to tomorrow. Maybe Laxus would come to his senses then.
"Did you ever think that Laxus is avoiding you for a reason?" Lucy asked her as she climbed up to balance on the stone wall overlooking the river, waving at the fisherman docking in for the night.
"Like what? You think he's scared?" Natsumi asked her, snickering. Maybe he'd decided he didn't want to mess with her after watching her beat Sting and Rogue. She guessed that was fair, but she fought against Erza all the time, even though she scared the hell out of Natsumi. It didn't seem like a good excuse, even if the thought of Laxus being afraid filled her with pride.
"Uh, yeah, I don't think that's it," Lucy quipped.
Happy looked to Lucy from his perch among the rat's nest that was his friend's hair. "Do you think Laxus just doesn't like Natsumi?"
Lucy laughed, "Honestly, I would have bet money on that before, but now I'm not so sure. It took him a while before he actually raised his voice, don't you think?"
Natsumi shrugged in response. She hadn't really given it much thought. She'd tried to get him to take her on so many time since he'd been reinstated, and he'd refused her each time. Just the fact that he didn't want to fight her made her want it even more. She wanted it so much, craved his respect as an opponent so badly, that she burned with it. The reasons for his refusal didn't bother her; only that he had them, and she wasn't willing to accept that.
"You're really not going to let this go, are you?" Lucy asked her, stopping her balancing act to turn directly toward her friend.
"Why should I? I'm not the one who's being all weird about it," she grumbled and crossed her arms over her chest.
Lucy was worried. She couldn't tell why this situation had her feeling so on edge, but it did. Laxus was being way too cagey about everything, and she had a sneaking suspicion that there was more to his refusal to fight Natsumi than he let on.
"Are you sure that's a good idea? Not giving up, I mean."
"Yes! He's being stupid and he doesn't even have a good reason for saying no."
The celestial mage smacked herself in the forehead, nearly knocking herself into the water in the process. "That's what I've been trying to tell you! Maybe he does have a reason and doesn't want to tell you! It's not like he owes you an explanation."
"It's not my problem if Laxus is being a big weirdo," Natsumi pouted.
"He may be acting suspicious, but you're being pretty weird, too," Lucy laughed and resumed her walking, the focus of maintaining her balance on the narrow wall helping to order all the thoughts that were flying through her head. "It's not like you to be so obsessed with stuff like this. I've never seen you so upset over something for so long. It's kind of freaking me out, honestly."
Natsumi sighed, reaching up to pet Happy's fur. "I don't know why it makes me so angry. But when I see Laxus acting like such a baby, it just fires me up, you know? He didn't get all weird about it when he fought me and Gajeel before Gramps kicked him out. He went all out against us!" She frowned, then, thinking about how much had changed since then.
"And when he wouldn't fight me in the forest after he moved back to Magnolia, I thought it was just because he wasn't part of the guild anymore. But when Guildarts let him back in, I thought I'd finally get a chance to show him how much more powerful I got, but then he just turned his nose up at me like he did when I was a kid, and it pissed me off!"
Her hands started to shake when she remembered every refusal he'd given her. Every half-assed excuse about her being too little, too young, too stupid. They were all bullshit, but she didn't care. She just wanted a chance to prove to him that she could hold her own and make him eat his words.
"I don't like being so angry at one of my guild mates, but I just can't help it! It's just…not fair!" she finished, taking in a large breath.
Looking at her friend's distress, Lucy decided to drop it, hoping that a good night's sleep would bring her back to her normal enthusiastic cheerfulness. She hoped that whatever was going through Laxus's head, he was doing a better job at sorting through his side of things than Natsumi was, and if not, she worried that the guild was in for far more trouble than anyone anticipated.
Note: And so ends the first chapter of what turned out to be a saga. Strap yourselves in, 'cause we're in for a long ride. And thanks for reading! I'll update within a few days to a week, depending on the response, though I also understand that since this is sort of a niche thing. If you feel inclined, drop a review! I'd love to hear feedback.