No. 1
Remus had not expected to nearly die when he walked into the dorm room, but with his friends, he should've known it was going to happen sooner or later.
His amber eyes watered as soon as the door was open, and he blinked away the water, quickly, his hand going up to his face to shield his sensitive nose from the acrid stench. He glanced over the small space, taking in the large pile of socks near the back of the room. He saw a lump of something moving under robes, and leftovers scattered all over Peter's bed. Or, what he thought to be Peter's bed. You never knew when James or Sirius wanted to change things up a bit and switch the beds for a practical joke. His bed, thankfully, was untouched.
He blinked again and drew his wand, walking cautiously into what had to be the stinky pits of hell. He ignored the food and socks in favor of looking into the moving robes, wondering what the hell was underneath. He was almost afraid to find out.
He didn't make a sound while he was walking, but damn, the lump made a sound when he poked it suspiciously with his wand. It was a cross between an elephant and a pissed off cat, the high screeching noise being muffled by the copious load of clothing. Something that looked like Sirius' hair popped out from underneath, twisted and turning round to look at what had poked him. When he spotted Remus, he grinned. Remus was not pleased to that his teeth had something caught between them.
"This room is a disgusting disaster. What did you do?" he demanded of the dog.
Sirius blinked, then replied cheekily, "I didn't do it. At least, not by myself." He pointed at the pile of socks. "James helped. Besides, this shit is all his anyway."
Following the direction of Sirius' finger, Remus blinked at the sock pile. "The Sock Pile of Death is hiding dear old Prongs?" he questioned lightly, his voice muffled from his lack of breath through his nose.
Sirius laughed. "Yup. He disappeared beneath it about an hour ago. Haven't seen him since."
"And Peter?" Remus inquired, racking his eyes across the room.
"No idea," the other replied, before he disappeared beneath the robes again.