"So there's this guy..." The sophmore drum major says in the most bubbly voice possibly for such a shy girl
And all the Freshmen Clarinet can do is fake a smile, and cover her heart breaking into a thousand and one shreds
"....Tell me ALL about it" she said with a fake coating on her voice
Why? Of all people... WHY did she have to fall in love with her Drum Major?
Her GIRL drum major?
It was NEVER going to happen, ever....
so why did she let herself get into this mess?
And sometimes, she wishes
she didn't have to watch her at all times on the field
because every little facial expression she makes, and every jerk of her hand and wrist
goes straight to memory, and won't stop popping into her head
And, she doesn't hurt her...
Because the Freshmen Clarinet doesn't get hurt anymore
Too many people have hurt her before, she can't be touched
So how is it that, it skips hurt
and she BREAKS her
because she LOVES her
...they love EACH OTHER
but not in the same way
And she knows she doesnt
...could never
Deserve her
So why is it NOT that simple?
And she ASKS why she tells her EVERYTHING
..."...Because you're my best friend"
she answers
...and it kills her..
And she KNOWS she's pretty
somewhere in the back of her mind
she's got to
Can't she see how long HER eyes are on her?
as her shoulder length, light brown hair keeps hitting the side of her cheek
as she sits, listening to the young girl ramble on and on about this guy
this guy who doesn't even know she exhists
"welcome to my life" she says as the story closes
"He's an idiot if he doesn't like you.."
"You're my best friend, you have to say that"
"No i don't"
"well.. he shouldn't like me... he likes her...and she's beautiful"
"So are you"
"i am not"
"Stop"
".....fine, you win...but i don't have to believe you"
"Thats okay... but im not going to lie to you"
and then its silent again
And she couldnt.. didnt lie to her
because she LOVES her
she would be dragged through the dirt
...shot
.....killed
.......hurt
as long as it meant she was okay
And the sad thing is,
she knew it would never happen
and she had accepted the heartbreak
and the pain that went a long with it
because she had never actually believed in the "Happily Ever After"
she didn't want
NEED
to be happy, ever
she didn't deserve it
"I Love You"
The drum major whispers
"You're my best friend"
she adds
"I Know..."
"... I Love You Too"
More than you will ever know