The begining is from pages 181 and ends halfway through 183
Something inside Clary cracked and broke, and words came pouring out. "What do you want me to tell you? The truth? The truth is that I love Simon like I should love you, and I wish he was my brother and you weren't, but I can't do anything about that and neither can you! Or do you have some ideas, since you're so goddamned smart?"
Jace sucked a breath in, and she realized he had never expected her to say what she'd just said, not in a million years. The look on his face said as much.
She scrambled to regain her composure. "Jace, I'm sorry, I didn't mean—"
"No. You're not sorry. Don't be sorry." He moved toward her, almost tripping over his feet—Jace, who never stumbled, never tripped over anything, never made an ungraceful move. His hands came up to cup her face; she felt the warmth of his fingertips, millimeters from her skin; knew she ought to pull away, but stood frozen, staring up at him. "You don't understand," he said. His voice shook. "I've never felt this way about anyone. I didn't think I could. I thought—the way I grew up—my father—"
"To love is to destroy," she said numbly. "I remember."
"I thought that part of my heart was broken," he said, and there was a look on his face as he spoke as if he were surprised to hear himself saying these words, saying my heart. "Forever. But you—"
"Jace. Don't." She reached up and covered his hands with hers, folding his fingers into her own. "It's pointless."
"That's not true." There was desperation in his voice. "If we both feel the same way—"
"It doesn't matter what we feel. There's nothing we can do." She heard her voice as if a stranger were speaking: remote, miserable. "Where would we go to be together? How could we live?"
"We could keep it a secret."
"People would find out. And I don't want to lie to my family, do you"
His reply was bitter. "What family? The Lightwoods hate me anyway."
"No, they don't. And I could never tell Luke. And my mother, what if she woke up, what would we say to her? This, what we want, it would be sickening to everyone we care about-"
"Sickening?" He dropped his hand from her face as if she'd pushed him away. He sounded stunned. "What we feel-what I feel-it's sickening to you?"
She caught her breath at the look on his face. "Maybe," she said in a whisper. "I don't know."
"Then you should have said that to begin with."
"Jace-"
But he was gone from her, his expression shut and locked like a door. It was hard to believe he'd ever looked at her another way. "I'm sorry I said anything, then." His voice was stiff, formal. "I won't be kissing you again. You can count on that."
Clary's heart did a slow, purposeless somersault as he moved away from her, plucked a towel off the top of the dresser, and headed back toward the bathroom. "But-Jace, what are you doing?"
"Finishing my shower. And if you've made me run through all the hot water, I'll be very annoyed." He stepped into the bathroom, kicking the door shut behind him.
Here is where my take on the story starts, most likely both Clary and Jace's point of views will be 1st person. I personally like writing in 1st person, better than 3rd, but that's just me!:)
I stood there, unsure of how I should feel. As soon as I called what we had-whatever it was- sickening I regretted it. The look on Jace's face was heartbreaking. As for Jace, it probably was torture, to hear the one thing he let himself care for, call what we had sickening. I let his words sink in, 'I won't be kissing you again. You can count on that.' My stomach dropped at the thought of him never kissing me again, let alone touching me.
Turning, I walked back over to Jace's made bed, picking up his long sleeved blue T-shirt he'd given me to change into. I looked at it questionably, before sitting numbly on his bed. Sitting the shirt aside, I turned to my clothing, quickly taking my dampened shoes and socks off.
Finally succeeding I stood, turning so that my back was to the bathroom door. Grabbing the hem of my drenched shirt, I seized it up and over my head so that all I had on was my black lace bra and jeans, that hung low on my hips from the water. Reaching for the button of my jeans, I quickly started to remove them. Reaching for Jace's shirt, I slipped the over-sized thing on, letting it fall just below my knees.
I sat on the bed listening to the running water, contemplating on whether or not to leave. Standing, I went and slid my back down against the door, turning my body so I was resting against the doorframe. Slowly, I drew my knees up to my chin.
"Jace...I don't know if you can hear me but..." I paused for a moment, trying to form the right words, hoping they'd sound as sincere as I felt. "I-I'm sorry! I didn't mean what I said. Just please, don't be angry with me-I can't take it...Why did I ask you to not be angry with me? That was stupid of me- it seems like everything I've been doing lately ends up being a stupid decision." I laid my head against my drawn up knees, as I started to softly cry.
I hadn't realized the door to the bathroom opened, until I felt someone gently shaking my shoulder. Jace. "Clary. Wake up." he called softly, looking up briefly, I could tell by the look in his eyes, he was surprised to find me like that. "Clary." he said again, this time barely a whisper, while dropping to his knees in front of me. I sat up, crossing my legs so he had more room. I started playing a loose thread of string on Jace's T-shirt, when all of a sudden Jace grabbed my hands, grasping my attention as well,
"What." the word rolled of my tongue more bitter than what I had intended it too. Jace flinched slightly, dropping my hands, his eyes darkened and became cold. "Never mind. Sorry, I couldn't help but notice how miserable you sounded because of me. I'm sorry that I actually fucking care about your feelings towards me." Jace ranted on, standing up, causing me to follow.
"Oh really? When have you ever truly cared about my feelings, Jace? Cause it seems to me like you never really felt anyth-" I was cut off by Jace, grabbing a hold of my wrist, twisting it behind my back and pulling so that my back was to his chest. "Don't you ever tell me how I feel towards something, Clary. Especially you!" Jace said roughly, his breath tickling my throat. He then released my wrist, trailing his hand down ever so slightly to my hip, where he rested it there, pulling me tighter against him.
My breath caught in my throat, when I finally regained breathing, I shivered slightly thinking of the things this could lead to. 'Bad Clary! He even said himself, he wouldn't be kissing you anymore. Plus you're related…' I thought briefly. 'But that hasn't stopped us from kissing before!' I shook my head, trying to get the lingering thoughts out. Jace must've take that as a good sign, before I knew it both of his hands came around to my stomach, then ghosting down toward the bottom hem of his shirt. I could feel him bunch up the fabric there, into fists. "Just say no, if you want me to stop." Jace said his voice husky, causing my body to heat up. I let out a shaky breath, as he slowly but surely brought the fabric up and up. I swallowed hard, trying to compose my breathing.
"I thought you weren't going to kiss me anymore?" I whispered, softly. I felt something low and heavy come from the back of Jace's throat, he was laughing at me! "I'm not, dear sister." he said simply, suddenly dropping the shirt hem, and moving away from me so fast I stumbled backwards.
I would've fallen if he hadn't caught my wrist, pulling me back towards him. This time we were face to face, only centimeters away from kissing. His breathing hitched, becoming rigid. I looked down quickly, seeing what little space was really between us. Looking back up, something inside me snapped. I couldn't take it, him being so close, so hypnotizing.
Before he could register what was happening, I interlocked my hands in his golden main, before crashing my lips against his own. Which must've taken him by surprise, since he stumbled backwards slightly. Before I knew it I was pinned against him and his bedroom door. I pulled back quickly, breathing heavily. Jace started kissing down my jaw, making my stomach drop. "What happened to you not kissing me again?" I said gasping for air, gripping onto him for support. Jace lifted his head to nip just underneath my jaw, causing an uncontrollable shiver run down my spine. "Fuck it. Especially if it makes you weak in the knees!" Jace murmured against my flesh.
Gripping his face lightly, I pulled him back up meeting his hungry lips with my own. Jace's hands gripped my hips, roughly pulling them to his own. One then came down to cup my butt, the other moved quickly to my thigh, raising me up. Locking my legs around torso, I pulled back quickly resting my forehead against his own. "What's wrong? Did I hurt you?" he asked out of breath. I shook my head no, looking at his face, I started tracing the outline of his lips with my index finger. Confusion swept over his face; "Clary, what're-" he began, but I stopped him with a kiss.
"Shush." I paused, getting my breathing under control. "Nothing's wrong, in fact everything I've been wanting…No needing, I have for the time being, and that's all I ever really wanted, Jace. I've wanted to be with you since the first time I met you, you don't know how horrible I felt when we found we were possibly related. Not only that but I can't stand to not be around you, you're like a drug I can't get unaddicted too! And no you didn't hurt me, actually you're making me feel I'm gonna need a cold shower….And by the looks of it, you're going to need one too!" I babbled endlessly.
Silence. Silence, was the only thing that was in the room, no one was talking. I'm not even sure if me or Jace were even breathing at that moment, when I spilled my guts to him for the second time that night- or well morning now. I started to get nervous, so I untangled myself from Jace's frozen body, and stepped around him, moving towards the door to go to my own bedroom. Shutting his bedroom door behind, I made a beeline for the kitchen. After fishing around in the fridge I finally settled for a glass of water, to cool myself down rather than taking a cold shower.
Leaning against the kitchen counter, I heard soft footsteps coming towards the kitchen. I was hoping it was Jace, but it wasn't, it was Isabelle. "Hey, what're you doing up?" she asked grabbing something out of the cupboard. I was about to speak, when all of a sudden Jace came running into the kitchen. I set my glass of water down, as Jace strutted to me, taking me by my waist ever so gently and placing a chaste kiss on my lips. Wrapping my hands in his hair, I smiled into the kiss, pulling only a few centimeters apart Jace laughed. I pulled back, looking at him confused, he noticed my odd look and nodded his head toward Isabelle, who was just standing there, shell shocked.
Laughing I turned back to Jace, who had a cheesy smile. I rolled my eyes; "Why did you do that?" I asked. He shrugged, "I guess I was shocked when you said those things to me, I didn't know what to do. So I just stood there, like an idiot. Then some common since clicked inside me and I came after you." Jace whispered, pulling me into a hug, placing a kiss on my head.
"Well I'm glad you did!" I whispered, kissing his jaw.
"Me too….Uh do you think Izzy's gonna be okay?" Jace asked, turning I looked at the girl, smiling as I did so. Walking over to her, I placed my hands on her shoulders, guiding her out of the kitchen. "B-but you guys…You're brother and siste- B-but!" She started to ramble, "Shh. You'll be okay! I promise." I told her, reassuringly, trying hard to not laugh. Hearing Jace chuckle to himself, wasn't helping either, as we lead the dumbfounded Isabelle back to bed.