Title: Of Voyeurs and Eavesdroppers
Author: synergyfox
Word Count: 268
Pairing: No pairing? Just Regina being entirely amused by Snowing?
A/N: Gods, I haven't written fic in two years and here I come bustin' out with a cracky little drabble.
"Come on, put your back into it."
A guard halted and glanced hesitantly towards the heavy doors of his Queen's bedchambers.
"Pathetic!"
Steve resisted the urge to press his helmeted head to the door.
"Really?"
He shook his head and squared his shoulders. The Queen's private life was the Queen's business.
"Oh come on… you can do better than that."
Oh how very tempting it was, he wanted to sate his curiosity and have something to discuss with the maids.
"Idiot."
Taking a breath, Steve hurried off down the hall as quietly as possible. Others had been beheaded for far less than eavesdropping on such private affairs.
"Is that really all you have to show for yourself?"
Steve covered his mouth and bit back laughter - it wouldn't do well to be caught.
—
Wholly amused by the image before her, Regina leaned back against her pillows and crossed her ankles. She tilted the mirror up and bit into a freshly sliced apple, humming with pleasure at the taste. Gazing into the mirror she smirked at the scene - Charming had just successfully planted his seed and was out like a rock, satisfied smile on his face.
"Absolutely horrid performance. I've seen better in cheap whorehouses." She tossed the mirror to the side and sighed, shaking her head in dismay. "What an utter waste of time." Regina slid from her bed and waved her hand, dispensing of her food and changing her clothing into attire far more appropriate for a queen.
She had peasants to deal with and decrees to look over for the noble lords of her land.
Fin.