"Everyone has that something that pushes them towards the edge."
Kurt swallowed the lump forming in his throat and blinked back the tears threatening to spill over.
"M-Mr. Shue?" Kurt almost whispered into the silent auditorium after clearing his throat.
"Yeah, Kurt?"
Everyone's eyes turned towards Kurt with concerned gazes, especially Blaine's who had been watching him silently nearly the whole glee meeting.
"Um, I just…" Kurt sighed, trying to muster up all his courage as a single tear slipped down his cheek. Blaine's hands flexed into fists, attempting to restrain himself from reaching out for his Kurt. "I know Blaine knows this, but I want to tell you all why Karofsky's suicide attempt hurt me in the way it did…" Kurt mumbled looking down at his lap as he allowed a few more tears to escape his red rimmed eyes.
Blaine cleared his throat slightly, catching Kurt's attention. He looked towards Blaine who gave him an encouraging little smile as if to say 'go on'.
"Um, well, in grade nine, before I joined glee I tried to end my life…" Kurt ended his sentence in a whisper. Tearful gasps were heard from the girls.
Kurt looked around at all the sad and pity-filled faces staring at him. A fresh wave of tears hit him and he could feel bile rising in his throat, choking him. The tears began streaming down his face as a sob ripped through him. "Blaine," was all he was able to choke out.
In an instant Blaine was wrapped around Kurt who was sat in his lap. Blaine held Kurt tightly and rocked him soothingly while whispering softly in his ear and placing soft kisses to his hair. Kurt clutched the front of his boyfriend sobbing into the soft cotton of Blaine's shirt.
The girls all attempted to reach out and comfort Kurt, but he simply shrank away from his friends and clung tighter to Blaine.
"Just give him a little time," Blaine whispered, not stopping his calming ministrations on his boyfriend.
A couple minutes of silence passed, the only sounds were Kurt's quiet cries and heavy breathing. Once Kurt's breathing had regulated and his tears had mostly dried, thanks to Blaine's soft sleeve wiping at his cheeks. He turned his face so one of his cheeks rested on Blaine's chest and everyone could mostly see his face.
"Sorry…" Kurt whispered, wanting to explain himself to everyone, but not yet ready to leave Blaine's protection.
Cries of protest were heard through out the group.
"No, no. I need to explain myself." Kurt decided his friends probably wouldn't care if he remained in Blaine's arms for his little story so he remained where he was with Blaine carding his fingers soothingly through the back of Kurt's hair and rubbing his upper arm softly. "Freshman year was…difficult to say the least; and I know it was for all of us. You're the fresh meat… a new target for all the older students… Well kids had always been cruel to me in elementary school, but never to the extent that people were in the first week of Grade 9. They were calling me names, fag, homo, twink…" Kurt choked and paused breathing deeply as Blaine kissed his cheek and urged him on. "I-I didn't know what they meant. I didn't ever REALLY know I was gay yet… I was 14, still a kid. It hurt and I was terrified. Terrified of their aggression towards me, confused as to why I was so repulsive, angry that they hated me and didn't even know me. So, one day after school I went home to an empty house. Dad was working late as usual so I started making dinner…" Kurt chewed his lip for a few seconds. "And there it was, the kitchen knife just lying there on the chopping board. I slit my wrists… My dad found me 3 minutes later sitting in a puddle of my own blood just…staring."
Blaine reached up and wiped Kurt's last few tears with his sleeve while Kurt protested. "Your gonna ruin your shirt," he whispered, snuggling back into Blaine, tucking his head under Blaine's chin.
"I don't care," Blaine laughed, kissing the top of Kurt's head again.
"I just, don't want any of you judging Karofsky for what he's done. You haven't been there and you don't understand how bad it hurts. How desperate you have to feel to want to end your own life… So just don't," Kurt whispered towards the group.
"Thank you, Kurt, for enlightening us all." Mr. Shuester said before ending the meeting and sending all of the kids to class.
"You coming to English, Kurt?" Tina asked, standing in front of Blaine and Kurt who still hadn't moved from their position.
"I'll meet you there, Tina. Thanks" Kurt smiled up at his Asian friend as everyone filed out of the auditorium.
"Your so brave baby, I love you," Blaine whispered to Kurt who simply snuggled closer to his boyfriend.
"I love you too. And thank you for being here whenever I need you." Kurt smiled. "By the way, happy anniversary Blainers"
Blaine smiled down at Kurt in return. "Happy one year anniversary Kurtie," Blaine said before kissing a smiling Kurt soundly.